Title: At Long Last My Love Has Come Along
Author: DazedConfused
Rated: R: not for kiddies
Show: Buffy: Pairing Willow and Xander.
Distribution: Yes please, just ask first.
Spoilers: Touches on 'Lover's Walk'
Feedback: Please do review
Disclaimer: I do not obviously own Buffy or any of the shows characters, Joss Whedon, and other Big Wigs do. I also used the song 'At long last my love has come along' (Etta James Version) and its lyrics; again I do not own it and I don't claim to.
Notes: In the episode 'Lovers Walk' Oz and Cordie come to rescue of Will and Xander and find them in bed together. My story starts with Oz not picking up Will's scent and driving on to find Giles. So what follows is how I thought the rest of the story could play out. Also I don't have the whole BTVS lingo down but hopefully you'll like this story anyway. I use a couple of lines from the show but I can't remember them word for word so there similar but not 100% the same.
I would like to dedicate this story to my dear friend (and excellent W&X writer) Lysa-uk who loves Willow and Xander, if you like the pairing you can find a link to her stories through my favourite authors.
At long last my love has come along
Cordelia and Oz sped along the deserted road towards the woods to retrieve Giles, not knowing that they had just driven past the Factory and their lovers.
Meanwhile in the Factory Willow and Xander lay on the bed.
"Were not suppose to" Willow said pulling back slightly from Xander after the two nearly kissed.
As Xander looked at Willow he didn't care about anything other then her, he knew Cordie was out there somewhere probably worried about him but at that moment he only wanted Willow.
"I think we could make an exception, since were going to die" Xander said trying to sound peppy but having a sinking sensation it might be true.
Willow was feeling guilty about everything; she had a million thoughts running through her head. All she wanted was for every one to be happy and get along. She didn't want to hurt anyone, especially Oz.
But as Xander finished talking all the thoughts went away and for once in a long time her mind was clear and she only had one thought: 'I want Xander'.
Willow and Xander looked at each other both sensing the others wanting and desire. Xander lent forward at the same time as Willow and their lips met.
Her lips were so soft and she tasted like peaches or strawberries, sweet and delicious. He put his hand on the back of head as their mouths opened and their tongues moved out to meet each other.
As they kissed Xander moved backwards so he was lying flat and Willow followed laying her body on top of his.
She moved her hands up and down the side of his body, felling the solidness of him and the muscles of his arms.
They rolled over as one and Willow titled her head back and Xander kissed her neck all over and then met back with her lips.
Neither could believe that this was happening after so long, but they couldn't deny how right it felt.
Willow's hand moved to his shirt and began to undo the buttons. He used his hands to support himself and lifted the top half of his body so he was balanced over her.
Looking down he smiled and she smiled her lopsided grin back, there was a certain urgency in their movements which was making the moment more intense.
When she finished undoing his shirt Xander pulled it off and flung it aside, he had an armless white vest on. Willow gave a little giggle.
"What?" Xander asked a smiling nervously, suddenly aware of being nearly naked.
"You kinda remain me of Bruce Willis" She said smiling up at him.
"Hey Bruce Willis, alright" He said lowering himself down and kissing her sweetly on the corner of her mouth and then more intensely on the lips.
Willows hands ran up his back and wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her face and neck.
They rolled over again so willow was on top, she pulled herself up, and so she was straddled over his body with a leg on either side of his hips.
She began to pull up her shirt, as Xander caught sight of her bare stomach he went in to ecstasy.
But then something happened, just as Willow was about to lift her top up over her breasts him he sat up.
"No wait" he said looking softly at her, she paused with her hands holding her top just below her breasts.
"What's wrong, did I do something" She mumbled the word something as if ashamed of herself for messing up.
"No, no" Xander told her pulling down her shirt and giving her cheek a light kiss.
"You didn't do anything wrong Will. It's just I want this to be right, our first time together.at all" he added looked down shyly at the 'at all' part, Willow lovingly stroked his face and all the fears and guilt came back.
"I've always wanted my first time to be special too. I kinda of thought that this was"
"It was, it was great" He rubbed his hands up and down her arms, silently kicking himself for being such a good guy.
"It just when were together for the first time, I don't want it to be a secret affair. I know that neither of us want to hurt Cordie or Oz but I think it would hurt them more if we do have sex and then they find out. He told her, hoping she would agree.
"Your right, I guess we got caught up in the moment"
"Plus I've been unconscious from a head wound, I wouldn't like to fall into a coma mid way through" He said with his usual Xander charm, hoping to make a laugh. Willow gave a little chuckle.
"And that whole thing about being dead either way, who are we kidding Buffy's gonna be kicking that door down any minute and saving the day" Xander added hoping it would come true.
Willow smiled and got up off the bed and picked up his shirt, passing it to him their fingers and eyes met and for a second they nearly ended up in bed together again. Lucky Willow quickly let go and started tidying herself up.
~
With Giles in tow Oz was speeding back into town. Cordie was sat up front with Oz whilst Giles was in the back putting on his clothes.
It seemed that for this certain retreat Giles had to strip down to his underwear and cover himself with mud and tribal body art.
Needless to say Cordie and Oz got a surprise to find Giles naked, mud smeared and dancing a merry jig.
"You know you shouldn't be drinking when you're a Watcher your on call all day" Cordie said
"For the last time I wasn't drinking you silly girl, I was dancing the jig of appeasement. It's suppose to help one reach enlightenment"
"Call it what you want but I know you'll paying for me to see a shrink"
Giles gave a sigh and although he knew better he asked anyway,
"And why would that be" he asked.
"Are you kidding, not only I'm I under stress about where Xander is but I was also subjected to seeing you naked and coated in make up and mud" Cordie said.
Before Giles could answer the van came to a screeching halt, Oz and Cordie jerked forward in their seats. There seatbelts pulling tightly across their chests and the two rocked back into their seats, Giles however who was pulling a sweater on at the time was thrown to the floor of the van.
"Really, how hard is it to bloody warn someone that your stopping" Giles said, his voice slightly muffled from his sweater being wrapped around his face.
"Sorry" Oz said absentmindedly as he concentrated on the couple on the other side of the road. He honked his horn and watched as the two walked closer, both Giles and Cordelia lent forward and watched out of Oz's window.
It was Buffy and Angel; they walked up to the side of the van.
"What are you guys up to" Cordie asked with a trance of annoyance in her voice, shouldn't they be looking for Willow and Xander not out on a Midnight Stroll.
"We found out that Will and Xander are at the Factory. Spike kidnapped Willow so she would but a spell on Drusilla so she would come back to him" Buffy told them, as Angel lingered behind her.
"Did he hurt them?" Oz asked, clenching the steering wheel with his hands.
"I think he threaten them but I'm sure their alright, I hope their alright" Buffy said.
"Hop in and I'll drive us the rest of the way" Oz said.
Buffy and Angel got in the back of the van with Giles and Oz sped to the Factory. Once there they all jumped out of the van and Oz and Cordie ran towards the entrance.
"Whoa guys, wait up" Buffy said easily catching up with them and blocking their way.
"What, we know their in there, lets go" Cordie said impatiently and Oz nodded his head in agreement.
"It's not that simple, the whole place is falling down and Spike might have left a surprise here or there. Plus they might be in a bad state, let Angel and me go in and we'll bring them out here"
They didn't want to wait on the side lines, but what Buffy said made sense. If one of them got hurt it would make getting Will and Xander out longer and harder. As one the pair moved back to Giles and the van.
The Factory was an accident waiting to happen, Buffy felt as if at any second the walls could fall down around her. Occasionally Angel would point out a place to be careful or put a hand out to help.
'He's so sweet' she thought and shook her head, 'friends were just friends'. But as he put a hand out to help her over rumble she couldn't help but smiled.
"What?" Angel asked catching her smiling to herself.
"Nothing, what, I mean. I'm always happy when I rescue my friends" Buffy said lamely, Angel gave her a strange look and he carried on walking. Buffy rolled her eyes and followed him.
"In here, I can hear and smell them" Angel said pulling up to what looked like a metal door.
"We'll get back to the whole 'smell' part later" Buffy said
"Willow, Xander" Buffy shouted through the door and then pressed her ear to it, waiting for a response.
"Buffy, Buffy, in here" She heard a muffled voice shout, it sounded like Willow.
"Together on Three" Buffy said and on three the Slayer and Vamp kicked down the door. They hit it with such force that he flew off its hinges and slid down the stairs.
Willow was stood next to a bed with a pale looking Xander lying on it. Buffy gave Willow a quick hug and then went over to Xander.
"Cordie, Oz and Giles are waiting outside; will you be alright to walk?" She asked him, he nodded and felt a little dizzy. Ever since his and Willow's close encounter he had been gradually getting worse.
Buffy supported his left side and Angel took his right, Willow followed them nervously looking at the patch of dried blood and Xander's head.
Both Xander and Willow were worried about getting outside; their other- halves would surely make a fuss over them. It felt awful to care so much about Oz and Cordie yet not enough to forget the attraction and history that the two of them shared.
As soon as they exited the Factory Oz rushed for Willow and Cordie for Xander, who groaned and Cordie saw for the first time just how bad he was.
Oz gave Willow a good squeeze but he had grown so attuned to her that he new something was wrong. He pulled back and looked her in the eyes,
'Was she hurt, scared, did Spike do something to her?' he wondered.
"I'm fine. Its Xander, he doesn't look so good" She told Oz sensing his concern for her. She lowered her voice and added "Do you think he's going to be okay?"
"Sure he is, we'll take him to the hospital right away" Oz assured her, putting an arm around her he led her to the van and helped her in to the front seat.
Angel and Buffy loaded Xander into the back and then climbed up next to him; Cordie had gotten in first and let them put his head in her lap.
Giles sat up front with Oz, Willow squeezed between them. As soon as everyone was ready Oz put his foot down and headed for Sunnydale hospital.
Xander was admitted into the hospital and the doctor told the gang that he had a concussion and would need to say in for a few days.
~
It was on his second day of hospital food that Xander finally built up enough coverage to confront Cordelia.
She had visited him everyday and he felt lowest of the lows for having to break up with but he knew that if he didn't do it now then he might never get the courage to again.
Xander sat in a chair by the window waiting for her to arrive. As soon as she saw him she gave him a hug and a kiss on the lips. She probably could tell something was wrong as soon when he didn't kiss her back but she put that down to being in hospital.
She sat on the end of his bed which was opposite his chair. For some reason she felt the need to prepare herself.
"We have to talk" Xander said hoping he wouldn't come out with any more cliché break up lines.
"No wait, no good conversations start out that way. Oh my God, is everything alright?" She went from defensive to worried in one easy step; he gave a small weary smile.
"I'm fine; I'm due to be released home tomorrow"
"So what is it then?"
"When I was in the Factory I thought that I would die, for a while I thought that I only had a few hours to live. I kinda got to thinking"
"What about, don't tell me you found God and now you're going to join a church and become a priest, just my luck" She said ready to go off on a tangent.
Xander knew if he didn't stop her Cordie would go on for a while, so he opened his mouth and prayed to God that he wouldn't hurt her too much.
"I was thinking and I realized that I like you a lot and you're a great person but you're not the right person for me. Cordelia I don't love you and I think it wrong for me to carried on going out with you when I don't have the same feelings you have for me"
Cordelia's had tears in her eyes and no matter how hard she tried to blink them away they wouldn't stop, using the back of her hand wasn't helping. She stood quickly and turned her back to Xander, not wanting him to see her crying over him. She spotted a box of tissues on his night stand and pulled five or six out and wiped her eyes and blew her nose.
Through out the whole scene Xander had tried to keep his eyes on the floor. When ever he did dare to look he felt an ache in the pit of his stomach, he did love her and he had never wanted to hurt her. But the thing was he loved her but not nearly as much as he loved Willow.
Cordelia whirled around and pointed a tissue filled hand at him.
"No one breaks up with Cordelia Chase, no one" She said forcefully, she felt out of control but she hoped on some level that Xander would agree with her and everything would be find.
"That's funny because I thought I just did" He groaned inwardly and closed his eyes in frustration, he hadn't meant to say it like that. Sometimes he would come out with the funny or being sarcastic with our trying.
Cordie glared at Xander and felt all her hate, anger, fear and sadness collide - the Bitch within was about to be released.
"How dare you break up with me! And what's with the whole 'I don't love you', you don't love me but you'll grope me for hours on end"
"Hey at the time you didn't seem to mind" Xander said sitting up in his chair.
"Excuse me but what was I suppose to say when your tongue's lodge down my throat. God do you have any idea what I gave up, my so called friends dropped me because I was with you. I went from being the most popular person in Sunnydale High, to becoming a social leper - all because I was dating you".
Xander was still feeling bad but now his anger was being stoked by Cordie illustrating just how big a loser he was.
"Alright Cordie I think I get the picture"
"You know I gave up everything I ever wanted to be with you, do you think I can go back? Of course I can't, all because you decide you don't want me any more. You know what I can't stand to be near you"
She threw her used tissues at him and glared at him with piercing eyes.
"Just remember what you had and what you threw away next time your home alone playing with yourself"
"Don't you mean by my self"
"You heard me right the first time" She said storming out of the room, Xander watched her go and gave a sigh of relief that it was all over.
"Well that went better then I thought it would" He said out loud to the empty room and turned to look out the window, wondering what Willow was up to now.
~
Willow was in the park waiting for Oz to arrive; her stomach was full of butterflies. Every other second she would change her mind on whether to break-up with Oz or not. She knew deep down that she loved Xander, she always had but at the same time Oz was just so.well Oz.
He sneaked up behind her and she gave a little jump when he put his hands over her eyes but recognizing his touch she relaxed.
"Hey" Oz said still behind her and giving her left cheek a kiss before coming around the bench and sitting next to her.
He took her hand like it was the most natural thing in the world and she couldn't help herself not to smile. She watched him and knew that they had something special, she loved him so much.
Willow let go of his hand and covered her hands with her eyes fighting back the tears. It was so hard, why couldn't it be easy. Why couldn't Xander have liked her years ago when she was single?
Oz worriedly put a hand on her shoulder and asked if she was alright she nodded and put her hands on her knees, playing with the hem of her short skirt.
"Willow, tell me what's wrong" Oz asked getting of the bench and kneeling in front of her. She bit her lower lip and sniffed, stopping her tears from falling but she could still feel them just behind her eyes.
"I have to tell you something but I don't know how"
"You know you can tell me anything" Oz said; which made Willow nearly start crying again, she smiled trying to be brave.
"It's so hard to say this and I want you to know that I never wanted to hurt you"
Oz's body tensed up, he didn't need to be psychic to know that the day wasn't going to end well.
"Will?"
"I love you but I can't go out with you anymore. I.you see.and well." Willow tried to find the right words but she didn't know what to say or how to explain it.
"Xander right" Oz said standing and sitting next to her on the bench again.
"How did you.?" she asked glancing over at his wounded looking face.
"When we first started going out I knew you were in love with him and I was Ok with it, as much as a guy can be when his girlfriends in love with another guy. But then it was like you started to see me and forget about him and for a while there I really thought that we were going to make it"
"I'm so sorry Oz, I did love you, and I do love you. It's just."
"You love him more" Oz finished for her.
"Does Xander know?" He asked.
"Yes, for a while now we've talked about it and we tried really hard to pretend it wasn't happening"
"I knew he was in love with you" Oz told her.
"What?"
"When you was in the Hospital and you heard me talking to you, it wasn't me it was Xander"
"That was Xander but why didn't you tell me"
"I guess because you said my name, he pretended it was me and I went along with it"
"Oz I know that I've hurt you but I hope we can still be friends". She said reaching for his hands but he pulled away and stood up.
"I know that I don't ever show my emotions but I do have them. Right now I'm pissed off, sad and really pissed off. Look I always want to be your friend but I can't sit and hold hands with you when you've just dumped me. I think that I'll be absent around you guys for a while until I can get my head around this"
"Are you going to be alright?"
"Not right away but maybe someday I will"
Oz turned and walked a few steps before turning back and planting a kiss on her forehead, a single tear slid down his cheek and then he left.
Willow watched him go and then began sobbing, she knew that she was doing the right thing but it still hurt and she still did love Oz in away.
~
The next day Xander was discharged, he had refused Buffy's offer of a ride in favor of walking and public transportation. He had decided to get home by himself or more accurately get to Willows.
When he had finally arrived on her doorstep he felt shy about ringing the door bell. It was stupid that after years of running in and out of each other's homes he would have this feeling now.
Before he could chicken out he rang her doorbell and waited. When Willow opened her door and found Xander looking coyly at her from under his mop of hair she gave a big smile and hugged.
She moved aside and let him in.
"I was just listening to some music in my room come on up" She said leading the way.
The room had basically stayed the same over the years he had known Willow with the exception of the yearly 'theme/fad'. It had transitioned from being filled with 'My little ponies', to 'Barbie's' and through a period of boy bands worshipping to now a more Wicca orientated theme. Except now it wasn't just his friend Willow's bedroom, it was the girl he was in love with bedroom.
"How are you feeling?" She asked him.
"Good they kept me in the second day just for observation, I'm supposed to take it easy and avoid any vigorous exercise".
Realizing he had just said 'vigorous exercise' when he was stood a few inches from Willow's bed caused Xander to blush, he turned quickly as if suddenly interested in a row of candles.
He picked one up and smelled it "Um scented" and then feeling stupid he cringed, putting the candle down he concentrated on not opening his mouth.
Willow gave a laugh, secretly pleased about how nervous she was making him. She moved in front of him and looked reassuringly in his eyes.
"Relax Xander; it's just me and you"
"Yeah except now me and you are not just me and you, were you know me and you. If that makes any sense" He said knowing what he meant and hoping she would to.
"I know, before we were best friends and now we're on our way to becoming more or at least I hope we are"
"So do I Willow, I broke up with Cordie"
"Really, I did to"
"You broke up with Cordie too, God dumped twice in one week that's rough"
He couldn't help but make a joke, he was trying to lessen the guilt and pain he felt for breaking up with Cordelia. Willow gave a little giggle, and then feeling bad for Cordie and thinking about Oz she let her laugher die down and then looked up at Xander expectantly.
"How was it with Oz" Xander asked putting his hands on her shoulders.
"Terrible, I felt awful, still do. But in a way I feel better no more lies or running around behind his back. I'm sorry I hurt him but I think.no I know it's for the best and with Cordie?"
"The same, she handled it with her usually charm of wondering how I could do it to Cordelia Chase"
He looked down and dropped the act of berating Cordie, something the two of them had done so well before she was a member of the gang. She had a right to be pissed he thought.
"I think part of it was an act to cover up how she felt. I still feel like we're doing something wrong just by being together, think that feeling will ever stop?" He said.
"I hope so, in time but until then we have to remember we've got nothing to be ashamed of or to hide"
The song that had been playing was near its end and Xander took Willow in his arms and the two began slow dancing. The next song started and the two smiled at each other as Etta James voice began singing, Willow leaning her head on his chest.
'At last my love as come along,
My lonely days are over and life is like a song,
At last the skies above are blue,
My heart was wrapped up in clover the night I looked at you,
I found a dream that I could speak to,
A dream I can call my own,
I found a thrill to press my cheek to,
A thrill that I've never known,
You smile, you smile oh and then the spell was cast,
And here we are in heaven,
For you are mine at last.
As the song ended they kissed and without any guilt or second guessing they lowered themselves down on to Willow's bed.
The End
Author: DazedConfused
Rated: R: not for kiddies
Show: Buffy: Pairing Willow and Xander.
Distribution: Yes please, just ask first.
Spoilers: Touches on 'Lover's Walk'
Feedback: Please do review
Disclaimer: I do not obviously own Buffy or any of the shows characters, Joss Whedon, and other Big Wigs do. I also used the song 'At long last my love has come along' (Etta James Version) and its lyrics; again I do not own it and I don't claim to.
Notes: In the episode 'Lovers Walk' Oz and Cordie come to rescue of Will and Xander and find them in bed together. My story starts with Oz not picking up Will's scent and driving on to find Giles. So what follows is how I thought the rest of the story could play out. Also I don't have the whole BTVS lingo down but hopefully you'll like this story anyway. I use a couple of lines from the show but I can't remember them word for word so there similar but not 100% the same.
I would like to dedicate this story to my dear friend (and excellent W&X writer) Lysa-uk who loves Willow and Xander, if you like the pairing you can find a link to her stories through my favourite authors.
At long last my love has come along
Cordelia and Oz sped along the deserted road towards the woods to retrieve Giles, not knowing that they had just driven past the Factory and their lovers.
Meanwhile in the Factory Willow and Xander lay on the bed.
"Were not suppose to" Willow said pulling back slightly from Xander after the two nearly kissed.
As Xander looked at Willow he didn't care about anything other then her, he knew Cordie was out there somewhere probably worried about him but at that moment he only wanted Willow.
"I think we could make an exception, since were going to die" Xander said trying to sound peppy but having a sinking sensation it might be true.
Willow was feeling guilty about everything; she had a million thoughts running through her head. All she wanted was for every one to be happy and get along. She didn't want to hurt anyone, especially Oz.
But as Xander finished talking all the thoughts went away and for once in a long time her mind was clear and she only had one thought: 'I want Xander'.
Willow and Xander looked at each other both sensing the others wanting and desire. Xander lent forward at the same time as Willow and their lips met.
Her lips were so soft and she tasted like peaches or strawberries, sweet and delicious. He put his hand on the back of head as their mouths opened and their tongues moved out to meet each other.
As they kissed Xander moved backwards so he was lying flat and Willow followed laying her body on top of his.
She moved her hands up and down the side of his body, felling the solidness of him and the muscles of his arms.
They rolled over as one and Willow titled her head back and Xander kissed her neck all over and then met back with her lips.
Neither could believe that this was happening after so long, but they couldn't deny how right it felt.
Willow's hand moved to his shirt and began to undo the buttons. He used his hands to support himself and lifted the top half of his body so he was balanced over her.
Looking down he smiled and she smiled her lopsided grin back, there was a certain urgency in their movements which was making the moment more intense.
When she finished undoing his shirt Xander pulled it off and flung it aside, he had an armless white vest on. Willow gave a little giggle.
"What?" Xander asked a smiling nervously, suddenly aware of being nearly naked.
"You kinda remain me of Bruce Willis" She said smiling up at him.
"Hey Bruce Willis, alright" He said lowering himself down and kissing her sweetly on the corner of her mouth and then more intensely on the lips.
Willows hands ran up his back and wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her face and neck.
They rolled over again so willow was on top, she pulled herself up, and so she was straddled over his body with a leg on either side of his hips.
She began to pull up her shirt, as Xander caught sight of her bare stomach he went in to ecstasy.
But then something happened, just as Willow was about to lift her top up over her breasts him he sat up.
"No wait" he said looking softly at her, she paused with her hands holding her top just below her breasts.
"What's wrong, did I do something" She mumbled the word something as if ashamed of herself for messing up.
"No, no" Xander told her pulling down her shirt and giving her cheek a light kiss.
"You didn't do anything wrong Will. It's just I want this to be right, our first time together.at all" he added looked down shyly at the 'at all' part, Willow lovingly stroked his face and all the fears and guilt came back.
"I've always wanted my first time to be special too. I kinda of thought that this was"
"It was, it was great" He rubbed his hands up and down her arms, silently kicking himself for being such a good guy.
"It just when were together for the first time, I don't want it to be a secret affair. I know that neither of us want to hurt Cordie or Oz but I think it would hurt them more if we do have sex and then they find out. He told her, hoping she would agree.
"Your right, I guess we got caught up in the moment"
"Plus I've been unconscious from a head wound, I wouldn't like to fall into a coma mid way through" He said with his usual Xander charm, hoping to make a laugh. Willow gave a little chuckle.
"And that whole thing about being dead either way, who are we kidding Buffy's gonna be kicking that door down any minute and saving the day" Xander added hoping it would come true.
Willow smiled and got up off the bed and picked up his shirt, passing it to him their fingers and eyes met and for a second they nearly ended up in bed together again. Lucky Willow quickly let go and started tidying herself up.
~
With Giles in tow Oz was speeding back into town. Cordie was sat up front with Oz whilst Giles was in the back putting on his clothes.
It seemed that for this certain retreat Giles had to strip down to his underwear and cover himself with mud and tribal body art.
Needless to say Cordie and Oz got a surprise to find Giles naked, mud smeared and dancing a merry jig.
"You know you shouldn't be drinking when you're a Watcher your on call all day" Cordie said
"For the last time I wasn't drinking you silly girl, I was dancing the jig of appeasement. It's suppose to help one reach enlightenment"
"Call it what you want but I know you'll paying for me to see a shrink"
Giles gave a sigh and although he knew better he asked anyway,
"And why would that be" he asked.
"Are you kidding, not only I'm I under stress about where Xander is but I was also subjected to seeing you naked and coated in make up and mud" Cordie said.
Before Giles could answer the van came to a screeching halt, Oz and Cordie jerked forward in their seats. There seatbelts pulling tightly across their chests and the two rocked back into their seats, Giles however who was pulling a sweater on at the time was thrown to the floor of the van.
"Really, how hard is it to bloody warn someone that your stopping" Giles said, his voice slightly muffled from his sweater being wrapped around his face.
"Sorry" Oz said absentmindedly as he concentrated on the couple on the other side of the road. He honked his horn and watched as the two walked closer, both Giles and Cordelia lent forward and watched out of Oz's window.
It was Buffy and Angel; they walked up to the side of the van.
"What are you guys up to" Cordie asked with a trance of annoyance in her voice, shouldn't they be looking for Willow and Xander not out on a Midnight Stroll.
"We found out that Will and Xander are at the Factory. Spike kidnapped Willow so she would but a spell on Drusilla so she would come back to him" Buffy told them, as Angel lingered behind her.
"Did he hurt them?" Oz asked, clenching the steering wheel with his hands.
"I think he threaten them but I'm sure their alright, I hope their alright" Buffy said.
"Hop in and I'll drive us the rest of the way" Oz said.
Buffy and Angel got in the back of the van with Giles and Oz sped to the Factory. Once there they all jumped out of the van and Oz and Cordie ran towards the entrance.
"Whoa guys, wait up" Buffy said easily catching up with them and blocking their way.
"What, we know their in there, lets go" Cordie said impatiently and Oz nodded his head in agreement.
"It's not that simple, the whole place is falling down and Spike might have left a surprise here or there. Plus they might be in a bad state, let Angel and me go in and we'll bring them out here"
They didn't want to wait on the side lines, but what Buffy said made sense. If one of them got hurt it would make getting Will and Xander out longer and harder. As one the pair moved back to Giles and the van.
The Factory was an accident waiting to happen, Buffy felt as if at any second the walls could fall down around her. Occasionally Angel would point out a place to be careful or put a hand out to help.
'He's so sweet' she thought and shook her head, 'friends were just friends'. But as he put a hand out to help her over rumble she couldn't help but smiled.
"What?" Angel asked catching her smiling to herself.
"Nothing, what, I mean. I'm always happy when I rescue my friends" Buffy said lamely, Angel gave her a strange look and he carried on walking. Buffy rolled her eyes and followed him.
"In here, I can hear and smell them" Angel said pulling up to what looked like a metal door.
"We'll get back to the whole 'smell' part later" Buffy said
"Willow, Xander" Buffy shouted through the door and then pressed her ear to it, waiting for a response.
"Buffy, Buffy, in here" She heard a muffled voice shout, it sounded like Willow.
"Together on Three" Buffy said and on three the Slayer and Vamp kicked down the door. They hit it with such force that he flew off its hinges and slid down the stairs.
Willow was stood next to a bed with a pale looking Xander lying on it. Buffy gave Willow a quick hug and then went over to Xander.
"Cordie, Oz and Giles are waiting outside; will you be alright to walk?" She asked him, he nodded and felt a little dizzy. Ever since his and Willow's close encounter he had been gradually getting worse.
Buffy supported his left side and Angel took his right, Willow followed them nervously looking at the patch of dried blood and Xander's head.
Both Xander and Willow were worried about getting outside; their other- halves would surely make a fuss over them. It felt awful to care so much about Oz and Cordie yet not enough to forget the attraction and history that the two of them shared.
As soon as they exited the Factory Oz rushed for Willow and Cordie for Xander, who groaned and Cordie saw for the first time just how bad he was.
Oz gave Willow a good squeeze but he had grown so attuned to her that he new something was wrong. He pulled back and looked her in the eyes,
'Was she hurt, scared, did Spike do something to her?' he wondered.
"I'm fine. Its Xander, he doesn't look so good" She told Oz sensing his concern for her. She lowered her voice and added "Do you think he's going to be okay?"
"Sure he is, we'll take him to the hospital right away" Oz assured her, putting an arm around her he led her to the van and helped her in to the front seat.
Angel and Buffy loaded Xander into the back and then climbed up next to him; Cordie had gotten in first and let them put his head in her lap.
Giles sat up front with Oz, Willow squeezed between them. As soon as everyone was ready Oz put his foot down and headed for Sunnydale hospital.
Xander was admitted into the hospital and the doctor told the gang that he had a concussion and would need to say in for a few days.
~
It was on his second day of hospital food that Xander finally built up enough coverage to confront Cordelia.
She had visited him everyday and he felt lowest of the lows for having to break up with but he knew that if he didn't do it now then he might never get the courage to again.
Xander sat in a chair by the window waiting for her to arrive. As soon as she saw him she gave him a hug and a kiss on the lips. She probably could tell something was wrong as soon when he didn't kiss her back but she put that down to being in hospital.
She sat on the end of his bed which was opposite his chair. For some reason she felt the need to prepare herself.
"We have to talk" Xander said hoping he wouldn't come out with any more cliché break up lines.
"No wait, no good conversations start out that way. Oh my God, is everything alright?" She went from defensive to worried in one easy step; he gave a small weary smile.
"I'm fine; I'm due to be released home tomorrow"
"So what is it then?"
"When I was in the Factory I thought that I would die, for a while I thought that I only had a few hours to live. I kinda got to thinking"
"What about, don't tell me you found God and now you're going to join a church and become a priest, just my luck" She said ready to go off on a tangent.
Xander knew if he didn't stop her Cordie would go on for a while, so he opened his mouth and prayed to God that he wouldn't hurt her too much.
"I was thinking and I realized that I like you a lot and you're a great person but you're not the right person for me. Cordelia I don't love you and I think it wrong for me to carried on going out with you when I don't have the same feelings you have for me"
Cordelia's had tears in her eyes and no matter how hard she tried to blink them away they wouldn't stop, using the back of her hand wasn't helping. She stood quickly and turned her back to Xander, not wanting him to see her crying over him. She spotted a box of tissues on his night stand and pulled five or six out and wiped her eyes and blew her nose.
Through out the whole scene Xander had tried to keep his eyes on the floor. When ever he did dare to look he felt an ache in the pit of his stomach, he did love her and he had never wanted to hurt her. But the thing was he loved her but not nearly as much as he loved Willow.
Cordelia whirled around and pointed a tissue filled hand at him.
"No one breaks up with Cordelia Chase, no one" She said forcefully, she felt out of control but she hoped on some level that Xander would agree with her and everything would be find.
"That's funny because I thought I just did" He groaned inwardly and closed his eyes in frustration, he hadn't meant to say it like that. Sometimes he would come out with the funny or being sarcastic with our trying.
Cordie glared at Xander and felt all her hate, anger, fear and sadness collide - the Bitch within was about to be released.
"How dare you break up with me! And what's with the whole 'I don't love you', you don't love me but you'll grope me for hours on end"
"Hey at the time you didn't seem to mind" Xander said sitting up in his chair.
"Excuse me but what was I suppose to say when your tongue's lodge down my throat. God do you have any idea what I gave up, my so called friends dropped me because I was with you. I went from being the most popular person in Sunnydale High, to becoming a social leper - all because I was dating you".
Xander was still feeling bad but now his anger was being stoked by Cordie illustrating just how big a loser he was.
"Alright Cordie I think I get the picture"
"You know I gave up everything I ever wanted to be with you, do you think I can go back? Of course I can't, all because you decide you don't want me any more. You know what I can't stand to be near you"
She threw her used tissues at him and glared at him with piercing eyes.
"Just remember what you had and what you threw away next time your home alone playing with yourself"
"Don't you mean by my self"
"You heard me right the first time" She said storming out of the room, Xander watched her go and gave a sigh of relief that it was all over.
"Well that went better then I thought it would" He said out loud to the empty room and turned to look out the window, wondering what Willow was up to now.
~
Willow was in the park waiting for Oz to arrive; her stomach was full of butterflies. Every other second she would change her mind on whether to break-up with Oz or not. She knew deep down that she loved Xander, she always had but at the same time Oz was just so.well Oz.
He sneaked up behind her and she gave a little jump when he put his hands over her eyes but recognizing his touch she relaxed.
"Hey" Oz said still behind her and giving her left cheek a kiss before coming around the bench and sitting next to her.
He took her hand like it was the most natural thing in the world and she couldn't help herself not to smile. She watched him and knew that they had something special, she loved him so much.
Willow let go of his hand and covered her hands with her eyes fighting back the tears. It was so hard, why couldn't it be easy. Why couldn't Xander have liked her years ago when she was single?
Oz worriedly put a hand on her shoulder and asked if she was alright she nodded and put her hands on her knees, playing with the hem of her short skirt.
"Willow, tell me what's wrong" Oz asked getting of the bench and kneeling in front of her. She bit her lower lip and sniffed, stopping her tears from falling but she could still feel them just behind her eyes.
"I have to tell you something but I don't know how"
"You know you can tell me anything" Oz said; which made Willow nearly start crying again, she smiled trying to be brave.
"It's so hard to say this and I want you to know that I never wanted to hurt you"
Oz's body tensed up, he didn't need to be psychic to know that the day wasn't going to end well.
"Will?"
"I love you but I can't go out with you anymore. I.you see.and well." Willow tried to find the right words but she didn't know what to say or how to explain it.
"Xander right" Oz said standing and sitting next to her on the bench again.
"How did you.?" she asked glancing over at his wounded looking face.
"When we first started going out I knew you were in love with him and I was Ok with it, as much as a guy can be when his girlfriends in love with another guy. But then it was like you started to see me and forget about him and for a while there I really thought that we were going to make it"
"I'm so sorry Oz, I did love you, and I do love you. It's just."
"You love him more" Oz finished for her.
"Does Xander know?" He asked.
"Yes, for a while now we've talked about it and we tried really hard to pretend it wasn't happening"
"I knew he was in love with you" Oz told her.
"What?"
"When you was in the Hospital and you heard me talking to you, it wasn't me it was Xander"
"That was Xander but why didn't you tell me"
"I guess because you said my name, he pretended it was me and I went along with it"
"Oz I know that I've hurt you but I hope we can still be friends". She said reaching for his hands but he pulled away and stood up.
"I know that I don't ever show my emotions but I do have them. Right now I'm pissed off, sad and really pissed off. Look I always want to be your friend but I can't sit and hold hands with you when you've just dumped me. I think that I'll be absent around you guys for a while until I can get my head around this"
"Are you going to be alright?"
"Not right away but maybe someday I will"
Oz turned and walked a few steps before turning back and planting a kiss on her forehead, a single tear slid down his cheek and then he left.
Willow watched him go and then began sobbing, she knew that she was doing the right thing but it still hurt and she still did love Oz in away.
~
The next day Xander was discharged, he had refused Buffy's offer of a ride in favor of walking and public transportation. He had decided to get home by himself or more accurately get to Willows.
When he had finally arrived on her doorstep he felt shy about ringing the door bell. It was stupid that after years of running in and out of each other's homes he would have this feeling now.
Before he could chicken out he rang her doorbell and waited. When Willow opened her door and found Xander looking coyly at her from under his mop of hair she gave a big smile and hugged.
She moved aside and let him in.
"I was just listening to some music in my room come on up" She said leading the way.
The room had basically stayed the same over the years he had known Willow with the exception of the yearly 'theme/fad'. It had transitioned from being filled with 'My little ponies', to 'Barbie's' and through a period of boy bands worshipping to now a more Wicca orientated theme. Except now it wasn't just his friend Willow's bedroom, it was the girl he was in love with bedroom.
"How are you feeling?" She asked him.
"Good they kept me in the second day just for observation, I'm supposed to take it easy and avoid any vigorous exercise".
Realizing he had just said 'vigorous exercise' when he was stood a few inches from Willow's bed caused Xander to blush, he turned quickly as if suddenly interested in a row of candles.
He picked one up and smelled it "Um scented" and then feeling stupid he cringed, putting the candle down he concentrated on not opening his mouth.
Willow gave a laugh, secretly pleased about how nervous she was making him. She moved in front of him and looked reassuringly in his eyes.
"Relax Xander; it's just me and you"
"Yeah except now me and you are not just me and you, were you know me and you. If that makes any sense" He said knowing what he meant and hoping she would to.
"I know, before we were best friends and now we're on our way to becoming more or at least I hope we are"
"So do I Willow, I broke up with Cordie"
"Really, I did to"
"You broke up with Cordie too, God dumped twice in one week that's rough"
He couldn't help but make a joke, he was trying to lessen the guilt and pain he felt for breaking up with Cordelia. Willow gave a little giggle, and then feeling bad for Cordie and thinking about Oz she let her laugher die down and then looked up at Xander expectantly.
"How was it with Oz" Xander asked putting his hands on her shoulders.
"Terrible, I felt awful, still do. But in a way I feel better no more lies or running around behind his back. I'm sorry I hurt him but I think.no I know it's for the best and with Cordie?"
"The same, she handled it with her usually charm of wondering how I could do it to Cordelia Chase"
He looked down and dropped the act of berating Cordie, something the two of them had done so well before she was a member of the gang. She had a right to be pissed he thought.
"I think part of it was an act to cover up how she felt. I still feel like we're doing something wrong just by being together, think that feeling will ever stop?" He said.
"I hope so, in time but until then we have to remember we've got nothing to be ashamed of or to hide"
The song that had been playing was near its end and Xander took Willow in his arms and the two began slow dancing. The next song started and the two smiled at each other as Etta James voice began singing, Willow leaning her head on his chest.
'At last my love as come along,
My lonely days are over and life is like a song,
At last the skies above are blue,
My heart was wrapped up in clover the night I looked at you,
I found a dream that I could speak to,
A dream I can call my own,
I found a thrill to press my cheek to,
A thrill that I've never known,
You smile, you smile oh and then the spell was cast,
And here we are in heaven,
For you are mine at last.
As the song ended they kissed and without any guilt or second guessing they lowered themselves down on to Willow's bed.
The End