Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/n: This story is dedicated to my friend Lizzie. She really came up with the basic structure of comedy while I wrote around it. So this is for you Lizzie!!!

Edward's POV

It was spring break and my brothers, sisters and I were so excited. Dad had planned a whole trip for us and wouldn't tell us what we're doing. However, we did see a hotel in Coast Rica pulled up on his laptop. We were beyond excited. Dad also said Bella could come which was an extra bonus in my opinion.

Today is the first day of spring break. Bella slept over last night and mom made a special break feast this morning. It was delicious.

"Where's dad" Emmett asked.

"He's getting ready for the trip." Mom smiled

My siblings and I all looked at each other with smiles on our faces. We didn't want to lead on that we knew where we were going. Just ten the phone rang.

"Hello, Cullen residence Esme speaking" my mother answered the phone. "Alright I'll tell them…..Ok bye honey….see you in a little bit….love you too bye, bye. That was your father children he wants you to get your bags downstairs and ready to go."

As quickly as possible we grabbed our suitcases and ran down the stairs.

"Coast Rica here I come" Rose screamed

"I can't wait to do all the shopping" Alice giggled

"No school, no homework, It's naptime for me." Emmett laughed "I can picture it now, me lying in a hammock asleep."

"The history is supposed to be amazing there." Jasper told me. I smiled. Jasper and I always had a fun time with historical stuff.

"Maybe I'll get a tan." Bella giggled. Soon we all joined in the laughter.

However, our laughter was interrupted by a loud honking noise. We ran outside to see a huge RV parked in front of our house.

"Hi Kids." My Dad yelled from the monstrosity of a vehicle. Soon he climbed out as the family stepped forward.

"What do you think?" he asked.

"It's beautiful Carlisle!" my mother shrieked as she wrapped her arms around him

"What happened to Coast Rica" Rosalie asked.

"Coast Rica?" Esme tilted her head "We were never going to Coast Rica….your father had this planned the whole time."

"Then why did we see hotel registration for a hotel in Coast Rica pulled up on your laptop." Alice threw out. Esme looked at Carlisle with a puzzled face.

"Well," He began. "If you must know, those were hotel registrations for this summer. Your mother and I are going on a little get away. It was going to be a surprise, but that's ruined now."

"We're going to Coast Rica this summer!!!" my mother kissed him again.

"Sorry to be rude dad" Emmett questioned "What possessed you to get an RV?"

"Well, Emmett I thought it would be a great family bonding experience." My father smiled proudly.

"So get your stuff kids it time to leave" my mother shouted.

We gathered our stuff slowly and walked at a slugs pace back to the retched RV. Mom and dad were all ready inside when we entered. It was actually a pretty nice RV.

"Grab a bunk." Dad yelled "bed in the back is ours so it's off limits.

Jasper took the middle bunk next to Alice….well across from Alice. Emmett immediately hopped on the top bunk above Jasper. He was so big it sunk down….just Jasper's luck. Rose slept across from Emmett. Bella and I took the two bottom bunks. Then we moved out in o the living area.

"Ready to go" my mom asked. We all groaned.

"Wait!" my dad yelled. "I forgot something." Just then he whipped out a captains hat and placed it on his head. "New rule….You must call me Captain Carlisle…..I need a first mate….Esme."

"No way Carlisle…I'm not wearing a hat." My mother refused

"Please" He pouted "You would be the cutest sailor ever."

"Fine." My mother took the hat and placed it on her head

"Alright now I need a skipper" he looked back at us "Come on….anyone…..please…..fine I'll pick…..Edward….you are my Skipper"

"Ha-ha" Emmett laughed.

Then he put the stupid hat on me. I felt like a five year old getting ready to take a picture.

"Where are we going, Carlisle." Bella asked

"Wherever the road takes us." My father replied as he put on his white Ray Ban Wayfarer.

Then we took off on the crappiest vacation ever. What was my father thinking? An RV for crying out loud. All I knew was that this spelled out trouble with a capital T.