AN: Hello there dear reader,
Firstly can I say thank you for clicking on this fanfiction. I am well aware that there as thousands of Klaine stories on here, so I am so grateful you have chosen mine to read.
This is a Future!Klaine story. It follows cannon slightly but is AU. There is Kurt and OC to begin with but I won't spoil everything for you guys.
I am hoping that this fanfic will be 15 Chapters long, but we'll see how it goes.
This is my first fanfiction. I do write CrissColfer drabbles as well, but this is kind of the longest thing I have ever written.
I hope you enjoy, see you at the end.
Love to you all,
Jadeannkneeky
His Hazel Eyes: A Kurt and Blaine Story
Prologue: 2016 NYU graduation party.
"Blaine..." I gasped shutting my eyes wishing the image would be gone from my mind. Closing the door behind me I hesitated, half of me wanting to go back inside the other half wanting to run without stopping and never look back. I felt silent tears run down my face. I breathed in and walked down the stairs taking two steps at a time; I heard his footsteps running down behind me. No one was around; they were all enjoying the party. It seemed like a different world to me. There was nothing to celebrate now.
"Kurt." I heard his pleading voice and felt his soft hand on my shoulder. I spun and came face to face with his hazel eyes.
"Please let me explain." he begged. I winced away from his touch and stared into the face of the man I loved.
"Blaine." I found myself saying. I closed my eyes wishing it would all go away, but all I kept seeing was the image of him and….I couldn't even think about it without feeling faint. I opened my eyes and looked into his. Tears were building there and he reached out to touch my cheek. His hand was soft and warm against my cheek. I leaned into it slightly out of habit before taking 2 steps away from him.
"Goodbye Blaine," I whispered and carried on down the stairs. It was over; my heart was broken.
Chapter 1: Someday…
"Kurt Hummel…Will you Marry me?" I stared at him. I looked into his Green eyes and knew my answer straight away.
"Yes!" He jumped up from the floor and picked me up around the waist spinning me around with him. Our lips met and we kissed passionately as our family and friends clapped and cheered around us. I broke the kiss and he put me back on the ground bringing our foreheads together.
"Best birthday ever," I whispered. It was the truth, Avan had organised a surprise party for my 26th Birthday. All of our family and friends were here and now we were going to get married. We smiled and I could see tears rising in his eyes. I reached up and kissed his eyes before kissing him softly on the lips again. He took my hand and slid a simple ring onto my finger and kissed it. I thought I was going to explode with happiness. I heard the tinkling of glasses and we looked over to my dad. He was standing up; Carole sitting by his side hand slipped her hand into his. I looked at my dad's face he was beaming, tears in his eyes. He wiped them away with this free hand and started to make his speech.
"Kurt I love you so much and am so happy for you. You have had so much crap over the years and I'm so happy that you found this amazing person who loves you and would do anything for you. I always thought you deserved the best Kurt but you got better than the best, you got Avan. To the engaged couple Kurt and Avan," My dad said raising his glass everyone followed and said our names. I looked around the room and caught Rachel and Mercedes eyes; both had tears in their eyes. They rushed over to us embracing me and Avan in huge hugs. People were coming over to congratulate Avan and I; I was so overwhelmed with it all. Finn gave me a huge hug and looked as though he was going cry.
"Kurt, I'm so happy for you." He said simply. He pulled me into another hug.
"Daddy, move over I want to give Uncle Kurtie a hug." We both look down and saw my beautiful niece pulling at Finn's trousers. He picked her up and she reached her arms out to me.
"Uncle Kurtie, You are going to have to wear a dress." Anna exclaimed wrapping her arms tightly around my shoulders. Both Fin and I laughed.
"How about I wear a nice suit and you wear a beautiful dress instead?" She giggled and kissed my cheek.
"You mean it uncle Kurtie?" I nodded and she squealed with excitement. "Uncle Avan, I get to wear a pretty dress at your wedding." She said turning her attention to Avan. He took her out of my arms and spun her around.
"Wow, you are going to look so beautiful," He said to her. I smiled at my fiancé's ease with children; I hoped that we could have our own some day.
"Anna, Come on now hunny. Auntie Mercedes wants to dance with you." Rachel's voice said from behind us. We all turned around and watched Anna run as fast as she could to her mother.
"Mommy, Mommy. Uncle Kurtie said I can wear a dress at his wedding, a pretty dress." She said excitedly.
"Avan can I have a word?" Finn said drawing our attention back to him.
"Sure," Avan kissed my forehead and followed Finn to the other side of the room.
I knew that Finn was probably doing his big brother bit and I rolled my eyes turning back to our guests.
The evening went on amazingly. After Avan and I had received congratulations from everyone in the room, people started to walk around the room. There was light music being played in the background and the dance floor was slowly filling up.
I could see Finn, Rachel and Anna talking to Mercedes, her husband Nick and their 4 year old twin boys Daniel and Darren at one of the tables. I watched them as Puck and Quinn, Mike and Tina, Artie and his wife Joan, Lauren and her boyfriend Rupert, Britney and Santana. I watched them taking to each other, laughing at the children and enjoying each others company. I smiled; I was glad that we had remained close friends after all of these years.
Seeing them all together reminded me of how far I had come in the past 10 years. I couldn't believe my luck; everything was going right in my life. I was becoming a successful designer and living in New York City. I had an amazing family and amazing friends who supported me with so many things and now I was getting married to my boyfriend of 3 years. I caught Avan's eye from across the room and he came over to me.
"Second surprise of the night," He said wrapping his arms around my shoulders. I groaned.
"You and your surprises! You know I like to know what's going on and here you are throwing things at me left right and centre. I don't think my heart can take anymore." I said dramatically. He smiled and rolled his eyes.
"You love it really," He kissed my cheek and didn't wait for a response. "I know you prefer live music to recorded music so I hired a band," He told me grinning. I smiled up at him.
"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" I asked him.
"You might have mentioned it before" I leaned up to kiss him deeply. "How about I show you how much I love you later on?" he asked me slyly. I smiled and kissed his jaw line.
"Why don't you show me right here right now?" I teased breathing on his neck.
"As pleasing as that sounds," He said trying to pull me from his neck. "Your dad and your brother might not enjoy watching" I smiled and looked over to my dad and Finn who were both watching us with hard expressions. I waved at them both and they drew their attention away from us. I laughed and Avan sat by me taking my hand in his playing with my ring.
"So what's this band like?" I asked him breaking our silence. He looked up at me, excitement in his eyes.
"They are so good; you're going to love them. The lead singer has an amazing voice; seriously if I didn't already have an amazing sexy talented fiancé I would seriously marry his voice." I laughed. "That's them now" Avan said pointing at the door as four guys in their mid twenties walked in carrying heavy equipment. We both watched as they moved over to the stage and began setting up their things. "If you like them we should hire them for our wedding." He said. I brought my attention back to him and he smiled slyly.
"We will argue that one later when I have come down from this high," I teased. "I'm going to go and speak to the New Directions for a bit, we haven't been together like this for ages," I said standing up and kissing him on the head. I walked away from him and walked towards my friends.
"Uncle Kurt, Anna said that she gets to wear a pretty dress at your wedding. She said that you would let me wear one to, Tell her that boys don't wear dresses Uncle Kurt," Darren said jumping on my lap as I sat down. I smiled as I saw his serious expression.
"You don't have to wear a dress, unless you want to of course." I said to the 4 year old. He laughed and turned to Anna.
"Told you so Anna," He said sticking his tongue out at her. She frowned and crossed her arms in a very Rachel like manner.
"Darren, don't stick your tongue out at people," Mercedes said to her child. He stopped and said sorry quietly. "Good boy, now go and dance with your Dad and brother for a bit." She said. He jumped off my lap and raced over to the dance floor.
"Do you have any ideas for your wedding yet Kurt?" Quinn asked me.
"He's only just got engaged Quinn, give him a chance," Puck said to his wife.
"Do you know me at all Puckerman?" I asked the former Jock. Everyone laughed, "Of course I have some ideas, going to need all of your girlies help though," I said to the group.
"I can't wait; knowing you Kurt this is going to be one of the best weddings ever." Tina said.
It was about an hour later the lights had dimmed and the band we getting ready to play, when Avan took to the stage and went to the mic.
"Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for Dalton." Everyone cheered and clapped and I smiled and walked over to Avan. He wrapped his arms around my waist as the music began to play. I pulled his head down for another kiss and heard the music start.
"You think I'm pretty without any makeup on…"
I felt my heart stop. I pulled out of our embrace and looked at the stage; he lifted his head and shook his dark curls out of his eyes he started to sing, his Hazel eyes burned into mine. I saw him and felt my heart break again. I knew it was going too well. Blaine Anderson was singing to me again, the same song that made me fall in love with him the first time.
Blaine POV:
"Blaine! Dude," I stopped strumming my guitar. I turned around and came face to face with my best friend Alex. He was bursting with excitement and obviously wanted to tell me some good news. We had been friends ever since we started work at a top law firm in New York City. We had started the same day and hit it off almost immediately. This was 4 years ago and since then we had became roommates and were as close as brothers.
About 2 years ago he had the idea of forming a band and asked me to help him start it and I agreed. Since then we had been known as Dalton named after my high school. We did the band thing as more of a hobby but people seemed to like us and we were getting more and more popular every month and today, apparently, was no different.
"Dude, I just got off the phone with a client. They want us to play at a Surprise Birthday Party/ Engagement party on the 27th." Alex said beaming.
"Sounds good but why are you so happy about it?" I asked putting my guitar on the floor and looking at him.
"I didn't tell you who the client is." He teased. I raised my eyebrows.
"Just tell me." I moaned; I wasn't in any mood to play games today. It had been 4 years since I spilt with Kurt and like every other year it hurt just as much. I remembered that night so vividly. Alex sighed.
"Come on Anderson, I know you had your heart broken like years ago but the past is past, seriously you need to get over him. How many boyfriends have you had since that one now?"
"Too many," I said sadly knowing where this conversation was heading, we had been here so many times.
"And why did every single one of them break up with you?" Alex asked sitting back in the chair and putting his feet on the coffee table.
"They all said they thought they weren't seeing all of me, like I was holding part of myself back." I replied rolling my eyes.
"Exactly, now do you want to know who we are playing for?" he asked.
"Go on then!" Thankful for the change of topic.
"Do you know the lead singer of the very popular band Lock and Key?" He asked me. Even I was taken back by this.
"Yes, they are so good. I have some of their songs on my iPod; his name is Avan Lovett right?" I replied.
"The very same."
"I didn't even know he had a girlfriend." I said leaning back in my chair.
"Dude he doesn't?" Alex raised his eyebrows at me.
"You mean...?" I stuttered.
"Yep as gay, as well you..." He said grinning as threw him a dirty look.
"He kept that one quiet."
"That's what I said." Alex said in a small voice.
"You spoke to him about his sexuality." I said raising an eyebrow.
"Kind of," He started. "I put my foot in it by asking him his girlfriend's name and he said he would if he had one and I was like oh I never knew you were gay and he said Problem? And I was like dude chill my best mate is gay so I'm totally okay with you guys and he was like good because apparently his boyfriend has had some real bad cases of homophobia in the past. It was a long conversation, come on I wasn't really going to pass on the opportunity to speak to Avan Lovett on the phone?" I shook my head in disbelief at his boldness.
"So where is it?" I asked picking up my guitar again.
"Some hotel on 4th, he said he'll email us the details." I nodded in acknowledgement.
"What's his partner called by the way?" I asked as Alex walked away.
"Erm...Hold on I wrote it down." he pulled a piece of paper from his back pocket. "Some fashion designer called Kurt Hummel." He shrugged and walked out of the room. I froze, my hand being inches away from playing a chord. My heart was beating so fast. It was my Kurt Hummel. The man whose heart I broke. The first man and last man I ever loved. The man who loved another; my heart stopped beating. He wasn't my Kurt any more.
Kurt's PVO:
"You think I'm pretty without any makeup on..." I couldn't look away. My heart was pounding in my ears, my whole body tensed and my palms started to sweat. I felt like I was going to throw up. Avan's arms were still wrapped loosely around my middle so I was stuck. I looked away from the stage to look at my family and friends. They all knew Blaine, knew what he did to me, knew what he looked like, yet none of them had realised that it was him on the stage. I couldn't breathe; I needed air. Calming myself down so that Avan didn't think there was anything going wrong, I looked up at him.
"Hun, I just going outside to get some air," I smiled at him reassuringly. He kissed me on the temple and let go.
"You alright? Do you want me to come with you?" he asked. I shook my head slowly.
"No you enjoy the…the music." I said stumbling over my words. His smiled broadened.
"I knew you'd like them," He said kissing me on the lips. I couldn't say anything. I let a fake smile fall across my face before leaving him and walking through the tables to the other side of the room. I tried to ignore the song and didn't look at the stage at all instead looking at the ground until I reached the door. I felt his gaze on me the whole time and sure enough when I turned around before leaving his Hazel eyes found mine. He looked into my soul the way he had so many times before. I looked away quickly and pushed the doors open walking away from him; like Ihad done so many times before.
Blaine POV:
I sat on the couch still letting the information sink in. Alex had gone back into the kitchen to make some food, muttering under his breath about how excited he was. I just sat there speechless.
"Wait until the others hear about this." He called out to me. I groaned to myself, the others would be just as excited as Alex was about this gig.
Along with myself and Alex there were three other members of our band: Mason, Rob and Danny. I had known Mason since high school; he had been in the Warblers with me. When we both moved to the University of NYU we had become really close and had stayed good friends ever since. He loved the idea of becoming a band and put near enough all his efforts into us becoming famous. Rob was Alex's younger brother and only joined because we couldn't find anyone else. While he got on with everyone really well, he was always the one that caused the most arguments, normally between himself and Alex. Danny was the newest member. He was Rob's best friend and had heard us play at one of our gigs and was interested in joining. We agreed and the rest was history.
They all liked Lock and Key as much as I did, I mean Mason was a huge fan; he had met them a few times and had seen them in concert. He also wouldn't want to pass at this chance, claiming it would be our big break.
I knew that the only way I could get out of this gig is if I told Alex we couldn't do it. If I could persuade Alex from declining the offer then the others would never find out about it.
"Shall we call the guys and go out for a celebratory drink? Rob and Mason can bring Sarah and Kim, I'll phone Steph see if she wants to come." Alex called from the kitchen, taking to himself more so than me. Now or Never, I thought to myself. Taking a deep breath, I walked into the kitchen.
"Listen," I started. Alex looked up from his phone, obviously about to call the others. "About this gig…" He frowned, his eyebrows coming together.
"Don't start Blaine." He said silencing me with his harsh tone. "You always complain about the gigs we do and yet it was you who said we should make this band"
"But-
"No buts. We are doing this gig. I don't care how much you complain about it, there are 4 other people in this band besides you," He said walking around me.
"Alex, please hear me out." I begged as I followed him into the living room.
"Blaine, stop! We are doing this gig, end of!" His voice was rising now. "You are the only one out of all of us who doesn't put 110% into this band and frankly I've had enough of it." He stood up straighter and his hands were failing all over the place empathising his words. I gapped at him.
"What are you trying to say?" I said, forgetting all about Kurt. I was suddenly aware of the elephant in the room.
"What do you think I'm trying to say?" Alex said quietly avoiding my eyes. I took a deep breath.
"You don't want me in the band anymore," Silence followed as Alex tried to put his words together.
"Blaine, you're so talented, but you've been so distant lately. All of the guys have agreed and we think it's best that you take a break from the band for a while." He said slowly; he looked at me sadly. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"Blaine…"He took a step forward to me. I backed away.
"You're kicking me out of the band," I said calmly.
"Not out right…"
"But you are going to replace me?" I yelled. He didn't answer; I shook my head in disbelief. "I am sorry that my mind has not been in it lately, I'm sorry that my father died last year and I am so sorry that the only reason I didn't want to do this stupid gig is because it happens to be the engagement party of the man I still love." I yelled at him. He looked at me in astonishment. I wiped an angry tear from my eye.
"Blaine…"
"Don't." I whispered. "Just don't." I looked at his expression; anger was replaced with pity and sorrow. I couldn't bring myself to hear what he had to say. Silently I backed away from the argument and walked into my room, slamming the door shut. I looked around my room and picked up the lamp off my desk, throwing it against the far wall. The bulb smashed and the room went dark. I had never felt so alone, I had managed to push away the only people who actually cared about me. Tears fell from my eyes again and I leaned against the door letting the pain wash over me. What had I done?
Kurt POV
I reached the street and the cold air hit my lungs, not realising that I had been holding my breath. I walked away from the entrance of the hotel and inside a dark alley. Making sure I was alone, I closed my eyes and leaned against the damp wall. The dampness seeped through my thin shirt but for once I didn't care about ruining my clothes. I tried to clear my mind but all I kept seeing were his hazel eyes burning into mine reminding me of that 16 year old boy I met on those stairs all those years ago.
I groaned and opened my eyes wide, balling my hands into fists refusing to let him have my heart again. I hated this situation, I hated how nothing went right in my life, I hated myself for getting so worked up about this but most of all I hated him. I hated his stupid wild hair, his stupid goofy smile, his stupid voice, and his stupid puppy dog eyes. I hated the band he was in, I hated that he ruined this perfect, amazing evening for me. I hated that he saved my life yet ruined it in one breath.
It took me a moment to realise that tears were falling down my cheeks. I wiped them away furiously remembering that I would never let myself cry because of him again. I closed my eyes again as the memory of that night came back to me.
The image of Blaine and him swam behind my eyes. I felt my heart break again. Slowly, the tears fell from my face once more and I fell to the ground unable to hold myself up anymore.
I was in love with Blaine. He had my heart from the moment we meet. Everyone knows that high school romances never last but our relationship wasn't just a romance, it was love. I was so sure that he would never hurt me because I knew I would never ever hurt him. We were together for so long but even seven years into our relationship he would make me blush at a drop of a hat, or when he reached over to take my hand I would always get butterflies in my stomach and when we made love it just felt so perfect; we were made for each other.
When I found him that night my world collapsed. I didn't think I could ever love anyone again, but Avan found me. He brought me back; saved me in more ways than even he knows. I love him. I hate Blaine. That's how I decided on my next move. I took a deep breath and took my phone from my pocket texting Avan quickly. Standing up, I brushed myself down and wiped away my tears. I planted a small smile on my face so that Avan couldn't see how much pain I was in. It took Avan all of 5 minutes to come out to me, his expression hard and concerned.
"Kurt, are you all right? You're freezing. Come inside," He said shrugging off his dinner jacket and wrapping it around my shoulders. I smiled and breathed in his soft scent.
"I'm not feeling very well, I think I have a headache coming on" I said quietly. He wrapped me in his arms and kissed my head.
"I didn't think you were; you didn't seem at all right when you came outside. Do you want me to take you home?" He asked meeting my eyes; I knew he didn't really want to leave the party.
"But the party…"
"Kurt, it's just a party. You're the most important thing to me, besides I've already asked you to marry me, which was the main reason for this party anyway." I smiled into his chest. He always treated me with so much love. I felt so guilty that I could never open up to him fully.
"Look, its okay. I'll go back myself. You stay and finish the party with our friends and family." I said to him pulling myself out of the embrace slightly.
"Don't be stupid Kurt I'm coming home with you." He said shaking his head.
"No!" I said loudly. I regretted it immediately when I saw hurt flash in his eyes. "Avan, just stay, my head hurts that all. I'll go home and sleep it off and be as good as new in the morning. Maybe we can carry on our own little party tomorrow night when I feel better." I said trying to defuse the tension that had appeared quickly. Avan stared at me for a moment. I looked down at my shoes so he couldn't see my red eyes.
"Kurt…What's going on?" He asked me quietly. I kicked myself mentally; of course he would know something was going on. I put the fake smile on my face again and looked up at him.
"I'm just worn out, tired and have a bad headache." I said trying to reassure him. He looked at me, hurt still shinning in his eyes. I wrapped myself in his arms again. "Avan, I just need to sleep. Seriously I'll be fine, I'll see you later okay." I said putting trying to put him at ease. He pulled away from my embrace and pinched the bridge of his nose closing his eyes for a moment. He sighed and looked at me.
"Fine, I'll see you later. I'll try and get away as soon as." He said. "You sure you're okay, nothing's happened has it?" He asked me. I shook my head a pulled him down kissing him quickly. I could feel his reluctance to let me go, I rested my forehead on his.
"Stop worrying, I'm meant to be the worry. I'm fine, I'll see you later. I love you." I said. He closed his eyes.
"I love you too." He said. I smiled and walked away from him.
I flagged down a taxi and slid in, leaving him standing in the same spot. I looked back at him as the taxi pulled away from the curb, disappointment was written all over his face. I felt my heart break again; I knew I was running out of chances with this man. He had given me his whole heart and was now waiting for me to do the same, I just wasn't sure I was ready.
Blaine POV
I woke up fully dressed on top of my covers. Moonlight was pouring into my room through a gap in my curtains. I rolled over onto my side to look at the time. The clock read 1:00 am. I rubbed my eyes, knowing that there was no point trying to go back to sleep. Sitting up, I noticed that there was a glass of water and 2 headache tablets next to my bed. I took them quickly and remembered the argument with Alex, I buried my head in my hands; shame washing over me. About 10 minutes later I heard a knock at my door. I ignored it knowing that it would be Alex wanting to talk about what happened. He knocked again and let himself in.
"Blaine…" He said softly. I felt my bed dip as he sat by my side. He reached out and put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "How are you feeling?"
"How the fuck do you think I'm feeling?" I said loudly. He didn't say anything for a minute.
"Sorry," He said quickly, "That was insensitive of me." We were quiet for a while. I knew he had more to say. "Why didn't you tell me or any of us about your father?" He asked bluntly.
"He disowned me when I was 16 years old, that's why." I replied bitterly.
"Man, I'm so sorry. I always wondered why you never spoke about your family but I asked Mason and he said that even he didn't really know what went down. Why did he disown you?" He asked. I gapped at him.
"Because he was over the moon that I was in love with another guy," I said sarcastically.
"Oh, okay" He said. We sat in silence again. I knew he was trying to work out what to say next.
"Blaine, please talk to me about this." He started, "You can't hold this in. I'm sorry I had a go at you but we are genuinely worried about you. You have been so distant lately and not yourself. Please talk to me." He said desperately. I took my hands from my face and looked into his eyes. He looked so scared, I felt so guilty about putting my friends through all of my problems. I really wanted to open up to him and tell him everything that had happened but I wasn't ready. I sighed and broke the eye contact.
"I just really don't want to do this gig." I explained. He removed his hand from my shoulder sighed to himself. He didn't say anything. "But it doesn't matter now because I'm not in the band," I said quickly trying to hide the disappointment in my voice. I honestly enjoyed being a part of Dalton and didn't want to leave. He shook his head at me.
"Of course you're not kicked out of the band, we just thought it might be best to give you a break for a while that's all. To be honest I don't think we were actually going to tell you. I just said it because I was pissed at you." He said. I felt relief spread over me. "But Blaine, we've rejected the other two gig offers we had because you said that you didn't want to do them."
"That wasn't just me, Danny agreed with me on the second one." I reasoned with him.
"That was only because he had a date that night." I frowned. "I know you don't want to do this gig, but honestly I think it will be good for you." He explained. I looked at him to see if he was joking. "Hear me out," He said. I nodded waiting to hear how he was going to persuade me. "You love this Kurt guy even after all of these years?" He asked me. I nodded again, feeling my heart flutter at the mention of Kurt's name. "You haven't been able to get over him; well this may be your chance." I was still confused. "He's going to be getting married," Alex said simply.
"Yes, and it's not to me." I said sadly. I remembered the promise ring I gave to Kurt when we graduated from high school. I remembered the night so clearly. I shook the memory from my mind trying to have some control over my emotions.
"Exactly, it's to somebody else, perfect time for closure."
"Closure?"
"Closure, you'll see how happy he is and realise that he has moved on and maybe you could do the same. Dude it's been 4 years, it's time don't you think?"
"Closure," I said under my breath. The more I thought about what he had said, the more it actually seemed like a good idea. Yes, it would be painful seeing Kurt happy with someone else, but maybe I could move on with my life. Seeing Kurt again might actually be a good thing.
"Are you going to do the concert?" Alex asked, breaking my thoughts.
"He might not want to see me," I said quietly remembering those words he screamed at me all those years ago, on that dreaded night.
"Mate, he'll be so wrapped up in his lover that he won't even realise it's you." He tried to reassure me. I wasn't sold but, despite my worries, I found myself agreeing to play the gig.
Dalton was going to be performing at Avan Lovett and Kurt Hummel's engagement party, what could go wrong?
Avan POV
"Kurt," I whispered entering the apartment. The whole house was dark, the only light coming from the streets. I found the light switch for the living room and turned it on. There was a half empty bottle of vodka on the table and a glass sat next to it. I frowned and picked them up taking them back into the kitchen. Kurt didn't usually drink spirits on their own; to be honest he didn't really drink at all. He was always complaining about what it did to your body and hated it when I got really drunk.
When I walked back into the living I noticed hundreds of photos were covering the floor. I picked up a handle of the photos that were closest to me. After flicking through them I realised that I had never seen any of the pictures before. I recognised a younger Kurt in a few of them and some of his friends and family, but in every single one of them there was a man who looked quite familiar. I picked up one of the smallest photos. It was Kurt, his old friend Wes-who I had meet a few times-in their old Dalton uniform and the other guy was there too, his hand wrapped around Kurt's waist. He wasn't looking at the camera but instead his eyes were on Kurt.
I felt myself get more and more angrier as I continued to pick up the pictures off the floor. I could tell that these pictures had been taken over a few years. Some of them were at Dalton or Kurt's other high school. Others were at NYU or at Kurt's home in Ohio. Most of them were taken on vacations or parties. In a few of the pictures Kurt and this other guy were kissing or holding hands not looking at the camera. I felt sick; Kurt had never mentioned this man before. I picked the last one up of the floor and placed them all on the coffee table. The picture on top of the pile was just the unknown man. He was laughing in the picture and had a drink in his hand. The background was dark which brought all the attention to the very good looking man. As I continued to stare at it, I felt a pain in my chest, Kurt had obviously loved this man and yet he had never mentioned him before.
I stood up and took one more look at the man's face. It dawned on me were I recognised him from; it was the lead singer of Dalton. My eyes widened, of course how did I not know? The name of the band was obviously taken from the high school both he and Kurt went to.
I remember Kurt tensing underneath me when the band had been playing earlier on. He had obviously recognised him as soon as he saw him. Something must've happened between them in order for Kurt to leave like he did.
I knew I should have wanted to kill this guy for what ever he did to Kurt but instead I felt myself getting pissed at Kurt. I should already know what he did to Kurt, Kurt should've told me, but he always shut down when ever we got deeper into his past. He never mentioned any past relationships saying that he had had a few flings in college and nothing in high school because he came from a mostly homophobic town.
I felt angry tears fall down my face; I had never felt so betrayed. He had been lying to me about everything. I'd always thought that when two people loved each other they shared everything. I always brushed it off when Kurt refused to tell me everything, thinking that he would tell me when he was ready. I thought asking him to marry me would show him that he could trust me with everything, How could have been so stupid? The memory of us standing in the alley this evening came back to me. I knew something was really wrong with him, but I let him go again.
With the back of my hand, I wiped away my tears and walked towards our bedroom. I slowly opened the door, letting the light from the living room fall over the bed. Kurt was curled up fully clothed on top of it; his body facing away from the door. I walked around the bed and looked down at my fiancé's face; he looked so beautiful and fragile when he slept. I bent down and kissed his forehead. He rolled over onto his back oblivious to the fact that I was there. I sighed and went to walk out of the room when I noticed something in his half clenched fist. I slowly opened his hand, trying not to disturb him, and saw what was there. My heart stopped, two rings were in his palm. A small promise ring and the engagement ring I had brought him. I knew who had given him the ring; I backed away from the bed and out of the room. Grabbing my coat, I left the apartment not wanting to be there when he woke up. I had known ever since I first looked at those photographs…Kurt didn't love me; he was still in love with someone else.
Kurt POV.
When the taxi pulled up at the apartment my head was banging. All I needed was a drink; that would help me forget. Forget what, I didn't know: Blaine, Avan, everything. I sighed, setting Avan's jacket and my keys on the telephone table. I walked into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of vodka and poured it quickly into an empty glass. I winced as the bitter taste ran down my throat. I poured another glass and took the bottle into the living room. I sat in silence letting the street noise fill the apartment.
I felt so useless. Seeing Avan's face as the taxi pulled away broke my heart; he deserved someone so much better. I never realised how much I was hurting him. He'd always ask me about my past, asking why I never spoke about former relationships, high school or college that often. I shrugged it off making up some bad excuse knowing that, even though he didn't believe me, he would drop it and change the subject because he loved me. I knew that I would have to tell him some day.
As our relationship grew deeper, he opened up to me more. He told me about his past and about he had struggled to come to terms with his sexuality and how he hated keeping it quiet from everyone because the record label would be worried about the image of the band. We would sit together in the living room and he would pour his heart out to me, crying on my shoulder on some occasions.
Deep down I knew that he was looking for me to do the same but I couldn't. Don't get me wrong I had tried so many times, but I always stopped myself. It wasn't that I didn't trust Avan, it was just I didn't want to open myself to anyone ever again. The deeper you got the harder you fell, Blaine had taught me that.
Blaine
His name made my skin crawl but my heart flutter at the same time. Seeing him tonight had brought make so many memories; some bad, most good. I remembered the first time he kissed me. I was making a coffin for my dead bird and he came in and started to speak about a song that were we going to sing. I asked him why he had chosen me to sing it with him, I remember being so anxious about asking him as if I already knew the answer.
"There comes a time when you say to yourself oh, there you are, I've been looking for you forever,"
I closed my eyes remembering the kiss; so deep, full of unspoken words. 'You move me Kurt' tears fell down my cheeks again. We were both so scared about our feelings. We were 17 and we had fallen in love. I smiled remembering the day he told me he loved me. No big gesture, no fireworks, just those perfect three words.
But he broke my heart, it took all of 2 minutes, but he broke it so badly I never thought it would ever be fixed. Avan tried, he has been trying so hard to glue it back together. Tonight would've made it perfect, made us perfect. Tonight should've been about me and Avan, getting married, starting our lives together, me giving him my whole heart. Instead, my heart was breaking again. All the progress we had made had been destroyed and this time, I didn't think even Avan would be able to fix it; All because of Blaine.
I walked into our bedroom and opened my huge wardrobe. I didn't realise what I was looking for until I found it. Right at the back of the wardrobe, behind winter coats and suitcases was an old shoe box. I carefully pulled it out and walked into the living room, my eyes never leaving the box in my hands. I placed it on the coffee table next to the vodka and reclined back into the chair. I hadn't opened this box at all since I had filled it up. It was like my very own Pandora's Box. The longer I thought about how much I would regret opening the box the more I wanted to open it. I opened my eyes, sat forward and poured myself another drink. I took the box in my hands and slid off the lid. His face shinned from the photo below, his hazel eyes looking back at me.
I looked at each picture, studying every detail before tossing it to the floor. By the time I reached the bottom of the box, the bottle of vodka was half empty. My head was spinning and hundreds of pictures of him were surrounding me. My cheeks were tear stained and my eyes were red raw. I hated myself for looking at those pictures; they all brought back unwanted feelings. I reached inside the box and pulled out the last thing in there. A small blue velvet ring box lay in the palm of my hand. The memory of the first time I saw that box hit me.
"Kurt Hummel," I turned around and saw Blaine on one knee. My mind immediately thought the worst. I knew he could see it in my expression. He laughed and pulled out a small blue velvet box. "I love you so much, it's not a proposal before you start, but it's a promise. A promise to never hurt you, never upset you, never leave you. A promise to love you forever, even when you're really ill and puking up your guts, or are being a stubborn cow because you want to watch Harry Potter and I want to watch Mulan, or when you wake up beside me and have bed head and morning breath," He winked at me. "A promise that I, Blaine Anderson, will someday ask you to do me the greatest honour and become my husband." He smiled at me and I felt my eyes fill up with tears. He opened the box and took at a plain silver band. "Will you accept this promise ring?" He said taking my hand. I blinked back the tears.
"Of course I will," He slid it onto my hand and kissed it. I pulled him off the ground and kissed him passionately. Fireworks were still going off around us, but we didn't care we were in love and we were going to be together forever.
"Happy new year Kurt," Blaine said pulling away.
"Happy new year Blaine," I whispered bringing myself back to reality. I opened the small box and took out the ring; bring it up to my eyeline. The engraving was still etched on the instead, it read Someday in italic writing. I took the ring and placed it in the palm of my hand. It had meant too much to me back then, now it was an empty promise. My engagement ring caught my eye. It was slightly too big for me, I realised as I slipped it off my finger and placed it on the palm of my hand next to the promise ring. Blaine would've got the right size, I thought to myself. My mind froze, what was I doing? It's the alcohol speaking, a small voice suggested. I shook away the thought and tried to stand up. It took me four attempts to get to my feet and walk to the bedroom. It didn't occur to me to tidy up and put things away, all I cared about was sleep. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically drained.
I collapsed onto of the bed and waited for sleep to come. The last thing I saw was the two rings in my hand, one of them burned more brightly than the other. As sleep took me I breathed quietly.
"Someday,"
Blaine POV
"I'm not even at the apartment yet; can you guys go and set up at the hotel without me?" I said to Alex as I crossed the busy street on the way back to our apartment. I heard him sigh at the other end of the phone.
"What ever but just don't be late, you have about 2 hours before we go on," Alex reminded me. I shook my head as I darted through the traffic that was slowly building. The Law firm was only a few blocks from the apartment so Alex and I walked there and back every day. He had booked himself half a day in order to get the equipment ready for the show. I would usually do the same but the thought of doing the gig put me on edge.
I had regretted agreeing to do the show as soon as I had agreed to it. Of course Kurt would be still pissed at me. The thought of seeing him again made me feel sick. I hoped that he didn't recognise me, but even I knew it was false hope. I had, therefore, tried to back out of doing the gig by other means. I had faked illness, tried to swap shifts with other people, booked a visit to see my brother and his family claiming I had forgotten all about it, but the guys weren't having any of it. They had ignored every single one of my excuses and said that I would be doing the gig even if they had to drag me there by my hair.
My last attempt of avoiding this concert had been procrastinating for the majority of the day, therefore leaving all my work until the last minute and making myself late. It would've worked as well if my boss hadn't told me to go home and get ready. Apparently he was a fan of Dalton and didn't want me missing the gig because I was doing work that could be left until the next day.
That's how I found myself leaving my apartment at 8:30 and climbing into a cab making my way over to the one place I didn't want to be. The only thing that was keeping me from running was the fact that I didn't want to let the others down. Alex had spoken to them all after our argument and told them what was going on and they had all agreed that doing the show would be good for me. They had all said that it would be an excellent time for closure. Bullshit.
The taxi pulled up outside the hotel at 8:45 giving me 15 minutes before I was meant to go on stage. I paid the driver and stepped out of the car, looking up at the entrance of the hotel. It was one of the best hotels in the city and was very expensive to stay at and even more to hire a room for a party. I shook my head; of course Avan Lovett could hire the whole hotel out if he wanted to, he was a millionaire. I pushed the bitter thoughts to the back of my mind and slowly forward to the hotel doors. I opened the doors and hurried inside. I was inside the doors when a familiar face walked up to me, his face red with anger.
"Where the hell have you been?" Mason practically shouted at me. I gapped at him stopping in my tracks. The few people that were in the reception turned and looked at us, he ignored them and continued shouting. "We have been phoning you none stop; we're going on stage in 5 minutes!"
"Sorry my battery died and I couldn't find my charger." I lied avoiding his eyes. Truth was I turned my phone off when I had finished on the phone with Alex. I knew they would be phoning me constantly making sure I was still coming, then reassuring me it would be alright, then asking me where the hell I was. I couldn't deal with them, I couldn't deal with anyone. I was so out of sorts and everything kind of felt like a dream. I couldn't believe I was in the same building as Kurt after all of these years.
"Forget it, you're here now. You ready to face the music?" He said to me softly.
"Of course not," I replied. "I'm still deciding whether I'm going to actually go through with it or not." He smiled.
"It will be fine, better than fine." He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and guided me down a hall way off the reception. We were quiet for a moment before he spoke. "I've already seen Kurt by the way, he's…changed." He said quietly. I remembered that Mason knew Kurt as well.
"Changed how?" I said.
"You'll see," His eyes twinkled as he looked down at me. I sighed, I wasn't ready for this, I was never going to be ready for this.
"Did he recognise you?" I asked him trying to keep the conversation going knowing that if I was left with my own thoughts I would run the other way.
"No, not from a distance anyway." He replied. "Avan came and spoke to us, he is cool man. To be honest he reminded me of you a little." I raised my eyebrows. "Only a little bit, to be honest if he wasn't getting married to the man you're in love with you two would get on like a house on fire." I ignored him. "Anyway, here we are." He guided me to a set of double doors. "Don't worry this is the stage entrance, we thought it would be better than going through a crowd of people who would want to kill you if they recognised you." He joked.
"Seriously, way to boost my confidence," I turned and glared at him. He brought his hands up in defence.
"Just keeping it real man," He pushed open the doors and led the way onto the stage.
"Jerk," I muttered under my breath and followed him through the doors. The others were gathered one corner waiting for us. I saw the party out of the corner of my eye and made myself look the other way, avoiding seeing everyone until I was on stage. It would be too late to run then.
"Blaine! Finally," Rob hissed when he saw us coming over to them. He handed me my guitar a little forcefully.
"Rob, leave him." Alex said glaring at him. He turned to me his expression softening. "You ready for this mate?" He asked me.
"Nope, I feel like I'm going to be sick," I whispered. I taking off my jacket and placing it on top of an equipment box. All of their eyes watched me as I walked back to them.
"It will be fine, remember closure," Danny said to me with a smile, I didn't return it.
"Okay guys, here we go, good luck." Alex said to us all as the lights dimmed on the crowd. "Blaine, I nearly forgot!" he said, the others had made their way on stage already. "We have changed the first song on the set list, something a little more appropriate." He said.
"Why have you changed it? We always start with Here comes the sun, it's a freaking crowd pleaser." I moaned.
"We're doing that second; we're starting with Teenage Dream." I felt myself go white. "I know we haven't rehearsed it as much, but I think it fits nicely with everything that is going on. You'll be fine," He said putting his hand on my back before walking out on stage.
I couldn't believe what was happening; I was going to be singing that song to Kurt again. It was like someone up there really hated me at the moment. I heard a man introduce us to the crowd of people. It was a split second decision, I could run away and never look back, or I could go out there and face whatever fate was waiting for me. Courage, I thought to myself. I shook my head and walked out on stage, taking my place at the microphone. I closed my eyes ignoring the crowd, ignoring Kurt, and just felt the music.
"You think I'm pretty without any makeup on,
You think I'm funny when I tell a punch line wrong,
I know you get me so I let my walls come down, down."
I opened my eyes and let the words take over me. My eyes found him straight away, standing to the side of the stage with Avan Lovett's arms wrapped around his waist. Mason was right he had changed; he was even more beautiful than before. I looked at his expression. His face had gone pale and his mouth was wide in shock. He recognised me and he wasn't happy about it. His gaze went to the other people in the room, I recognised his family and some of his friends, none of them had realised who I was. I brought my attention back to him. He had turned to Avan and was speaking to him. I saw him smile before untangling himself from his partner and walk across the room. As I watched he walked between the tables, still with the familiar grace that I remembered, He reached the door and turned back and looked at me. I felt so many emotions hit me at once. Angry, sorrow, despair, regret and most importantly love. I still loved him even after all this time. Even after seeing him happy with someone else. I still loved him, always have and always will.
With one last fleeting glance he opened the door and disappeared from view. I could still see his face as I pulled my eyes away from the door. I could still see the look in his eyes that same emotion mixed with all the rest. It was the same look he gave me all those years ago, disappointment. I knew, in that moment, I would do everything to get Kurt to never look at me like that again. It wasn't going to be easy, but I could never live with myself ever again if I hadn't set the story straight and told Kurt exactly how much he meant to me.
There we go, I hoped you liked it. You have no idea how excited I was when I finished this Chapter.
Please review etc. It will make me sajidogdfjgudfh A LOT!
Love to you all,
see you in Chapter 2.