Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer not me.
Author/Note 1: This one-shot follows what happens in chapters 18, 19 and 20 of Our Dawn 1. For the ones who don't remember what happened in these two chapters of the first part of the Our Dawn Series, Bella and Edward are ready to get married right after she was turned into a vampire. Jacob is trying hard to let go of Bella's memories and he notices Leah for the first time.
A/Note 2: I'm not a native English speaker so I'm sorry for my grammar and spelling. Thank you for reading.
Our Dawn Series Specials
Episode One – Will you be my Beta?
Jacob Black
I slowly got up from my bed and went to the bathroom, kicking and tripping on my clothes and shoes scattered all over the floor. I had a quick shower and started to get myself presentable for the big day.
I had left the Cullen's house less than an hour ago. The mind rapist had invited us for his bachelor party and we couldn't refuse. Well I wanted to but that was what Edward wanted me to do so I decided to do the exact opposite just to piss him off. The night ended up being unexpectedly fun but that was just because we had all the food and drinks we wanted for free.
Since I arrived home I had locked myself in my bedroom thinking about what was about to happen. Bella was getting married to him. I had tried to ignore the subject because I wanted to forget I had once loved that girl. It was hard for me but I wanted to accept that Bella was no longer my best friend, she wasn't even human anymore and she was about to have her happy ending. I should feel happy for her and move on.
But things weren't that easy. Feelings didn't disappear overnight and five days weren't enough to take Bella out of my mind or my heart. Maybe I would be able to forget in five years but never in five days.
I still loved her in a weird kind of way. We could no longer be together since she was now my mortal enemy but I could still see the old Bella and that was killing me inside. I could've let Bella die when Irina attacked us but I chose to let Edward turn her. She was going to marry him because I had allowed the mind rapist to save her or condemn her, it depends on the point of view.
The pain hit me full force again and I almost wished to be crushed by a newborn vampire again. At least that way my body would hurt but not my heart. I had ran away once because I didn't want to see her getting married to Edward Cullen but this time I couldn't run anymore. This was it and it was final. I had to get my own closure. Bella would never be mine.
Dressing up carefully not to ruin the expensive suit that Alice had bought me, I tried to keep my thoughts away from Bella and her new life with the mind rapist. I just had to think that they were my enemies and everything would be fine, right?
Wrong. I had promised Bella to be with her as long as she needed me. I had made clear to everyone in the pack that I would not tolerate a hostile position against the Cullens just because I still loved her. I was an idiot.
I knew I was being stupid but the memories, our memories, were still alive in my head and five days weren't enough to let it go.
After getting dressed I made my way over to my dad's bedroom but he didn't need any help. Rachel had helped him before leaving to the Clearwater's house. I was about to have a glass of milk when I felt that someone was coming. Unfortunately he was one of the people I hated the most today.
Out of politeness, something that he had acquired just a few days ago, Paul knocked on the door.
"She's not here." I yelled at him without moving.
"Can you at least open the door?" He asked.
"No."
"Jacob…please don't make a scene." My father said wheeling himself towards the door.
"I'm not doing anything." I made an innocent face.
"Where is she?" Paul asked as soon as dad opened the door.
"Mind your own businesses, Paul." I stated.
"Come on, Jake…She's my imprint. We're meant to be together besides it's not like I asked to imprint on your sister."
"Then fight against it." I suggested.
"I can't."
I rolled my eyes and kept making my sandwich.
"My sister had a brilliant future ahead…now she's stuck with you."
Rachel was just like Bella now. Stuck with a dumbass forever. The only difference was that Paul wasn't dead…yet. I hadn't killed him so far because Rachel had shown interest in the douche and I didn't want to cause her any pain but if he tried anything funny with her, he was going to get his ass kicked.
"I think I'm falling in love with her." Paul said. "You believe me, don't you Mr. Black?"
"Yeah…I guess so. Rachel told me she likes you too." My dad confessed. He was happy because this way Rachel would stay in La Push with us.
I would never forget my sister's words when she admitted that she was starting to have feelings for Paul Lahote a few days ago. We ended up arguing and she even hit me stating that I wasn't her father and couldn't boss her around. I sure wasn't her father but I would never let my sister in the hands of some perverted douche like Paul without putting up a fight. She deserved better than that.
"She said that? When?" Paul asked with a large smirk on his stupid face.
"A couple of days ago but don't get your hopes too high son…she didn't say the L word."
I sighed sadly. Rachel didn't say she loved Paul but the way she spoke of him, I knew she would say it soon.
I should've done something very wrong in my previous life to deserve such a shitty fate.
"So…Where's Rachel then?"
"At Sue's." My dad answered.
"Where do you think you're going asshole?" I asked when Paul was about to leave.
"To pick her up?" He raised an eyebrow.
"I don't think so."
"You can't stop me!" Paul fumed. "I know you're the alpha now but I'm just going to pick her up and take her to the Cullens I'm not going to run away with her and…"
"We got the point Paul." My father warned.
"You're wrong about something though…" I grinned. "I can stop you if I want to. I'm not the alpha just for fun."
"I know…You're the alpha because you want to protect the treaty we have with the Cullens and want to stay close to your ex-girlfriend."
"Shut up!" I warned him.
"Don't provoke my son, Paul. Jake's not in the mood today."
"Why not? Oh…wait I remember now…because his girlfriend is getting married to another."
"That's it!" I stepped forward but my father put himself between Paul and I preventing me from kicking him senseless.
"So…are you going to alpha command me or can I go see my imprint?"
My dad handed Paul the keys to my car and Paul looked at him confused.
"Take the Rabbit out of the garage please." He asked. "You're coming with us to pick up Rachel."
Oh great! Now I was going to have to endure Paul all the way to the Clearwater's and during the damn wedding. I did have a backup plan though and that was the reason why I had sent Rachel over to Sue's place.
When I arrived home that morning, a bit wasted, Seth called to tell me Leah wanted to skip the wedding and stay at home. I really didn't give a flying shit about that but then I remembered that Rachel used to be Leah's friend and Leah hated Paul probably even more than I did. So I just had to make sure my sister and Leah would tag along during the ceremony. That would keep Paul at a safe distance and I could relax for a while.
"Why is Rachel at Sue's?" Paul asked.
"She's dressing up for the wedding with Leah." My father explained. "Women stuff."
"Dressing up with the harpy? That's a surprise." He laughed.
I hoped Rachel had managed to convince Leah to go. I had specifically told her that her mission was to convince Leah Clearwater to go to Bella's wedding.
"Leah should just stay at home. She's not into weddings…I mean with Sam and Emily's coming up soon I'm sure she'll be a super-bitch today." Paul commented.
Paul was right. Leah wasn't the easiest person to be around nowadays. She was still hurting a lot because Sam had dumped her but I needed her to go to this particular wedding. My mental sanity depended on it.
I parked the Rabbit near Sue's house and my dad stayed in the car. I knocked and Seth came to meet us. Embry and Quil were at his place as well. Then we heard Leah's voice upstairs. She was not in a good mood.
"What part of I don't want to go, did you not understand Rach?" She asked.
"Come on Leah. We're already dressed might as well go there and have some fun." My sister tried.
"I'm not in the mood for happy endings."
I knew exactly what she was referring to and I could relate. I wasn't happy to see the girl of my dreams getting married to Edward Cullen just like she wasn't happy to know that Sam would marry Emily soon.
"Give me a good reason to stay at home." Rachel demanded and Leah kept quiet. She hadn't told Rachel why Sam had dumped her and I guess she didn't want to tell her that the only reason she didn't want to go was because she would start thinking about Sam and Emily's wedding next year.
Now I knew why Rachel and Leah had always been friends. They were stubborn, bitchy, and bossy. God helped Paul and the idiot who would fall in love with Leah Clearwater. The bastard would have to be either a masochist or really unlucky.
My thoughts were shaken by the image of a young woman coming down the stairs. She looked quite familiar but I didn't recognise her immediately. Leah was practically unrecognisable. She was wearing a dark red dress with no sleeves. The corset of the dress gave us a really good view to her round and perfect breasts. The rest of the dress hugged her body perfectly, showing off the curves of her well defined waist. Her hair was up and she wasn't wearing any make-up which she didn't need anyways. The word "beautiful" wasn't enough to describe Leah in that dress and all I could think of was that Sam was a stupid asshole for choosing Emily over her.
"I'm still waiting Leah." Rachel said coming down the stairs too. "If you don't give me a good reason I'm going to drag you there, do you hear me? I'm not going to leave you here drowning in your self-pity. You need to show him you've moved on."
"Fine." Leah yelled back going to the kitchen and putting her shoes on. "Let's get over with this shit."
"Great. Let's go then." Rachel smiled and winked at me. Mission accomplished.
"What the hell are you looking at?" Leah groaned.
I was still staring at her but I noticed she wasn't speaking to me, she was addressing Embry who was now blushing so hard he was the same colour as her dress.
"Stupid teenagers." Leah spat and went to Sue's car.
When she passed me by I couldn't help to glance at her body again. Truth to be told Leah had become quite hot after turning into a wolf. I had seen her naked many times before, just for fun or to piss her off, but today was different. She was breathtaking beautiful and my mind started to play tricks with me because for a split second I imagined how it would feel like to take off her clothes and touch her golden skin.
"Hey moron!" Paul's voice brought me back to reality. "We're leaving."
"What?" I asked stupidly.
"Are you coming or what?"
Everyone was already by the cars and I was still planted like a damn idiot at Sue's front door. I looked at Leah and decided that my last thoughts were way out of order. I was probably just fantasizing because I was too upset about losing Bella.
The wedding's reception was a torture. Bella was gorgeous but now her beauty seemed somehow fake. She was too pale and for a second there all I saw was a vampire and not my old friend. Renée flinched when she saw us coming and hid behind Charlie. I guess she was still not used to be around mythical creatures. I made sure to be around Paul so he wouldn't go and harass my sister who was with Leah now.
Seth spun Bella around like if she was just the same old and human Bella and I saw Leah disgusted look watching her brother acting so normally around the leeches. Then Esme arrived armed with the camera and began to take pictures. I had to fake a smile too many times until she was satisfied and then Blondie called everyone to take their places.
Charlie stayed with Bella for some father and daughter time.
I waited until everyone was sitting down and when I realised that Embry and Quil were flanking Paul, I went to the third row and sat down next to Leah.
I didn't have the intention of sitting next to her but for some reason I did. I guess I needed to be around someone who also felt cheated. Whenever I was tired to look at the happy couple I could look at Leah's breasts.
"Next time I'm going to charge you." She said aggressively.
"What?" I asked surprised.
"I'm not your sister's babysitter." She stated in a low voice so Rachel wouldn't hear us.
I didn't reply. I would probably get hurt if I did.
"What? Did you think I wouldn't know your little plan?" She smirked.
"I had to do something. She's…having feelings for him…"
"One day it will be you. Get used to it." She said with a hint of pain in her voice while her eyes caught up Sam and Emily on the row behind us.
"At least I'm not an asshole."
"Of course you are…You all are. You see a girl…a stranger and your world just stops. How lame is that?"
"It's not my fault Sam couldn't fight it off."
"And you think you can?"
"I don't know…maybe...if I have a motive."
"You should just accept it. Now that your precious leech lover is a leech herself and is going to marry her also dead lover, you should just consider the idea that you'd be better off with your imprint."
"And if I don't find my soul mate?"
"You will. You're the alpha now."
"That doesn't mean a thing."
"You'll find her."
"I don't want to be forced to love someone I don't know. I want to make my own destiny."
"I wanted to get married and have a couple of kids and look at me."
"You can still…"
"Shut up." She cut me off. "Don't dare to give me that bullshit!"
"Shhhh!" Rachel scolded us. "Bella and Charlie are coming."
I forced myself to stay put while Bella was declared Edward's wife. I wanted nothing more but to leave and never come back but I had a promise to keep. Besides I had been the one to give permission to the mind rapist to turn her, I knew this would happen eventually and maybe this was for the best. Better now than later, right?
Maybe now I could start looking for someone who could love me and only me. Someone who could give her heart to me and ask nothing in return. My soul mate perhaps?
I looked over to my right side when Bella and Edward were kissing and I saw Leah diverting her eyes too.
I hoped this girl, the one who would fall for me in the future, could be as beautiful as Leah. I narrowed my eyes at that thought. Why had I thought about Leah? I probably needed some sleep.
After the wedding came the food. I wasn't particularly hungry but it wasn't in my nature to refuse a free meal. When we were done eating the music started and I watched as Bella danced with her father first and then with Carlisle.
I didn't dance as well as the leeches but I did want to have a dance with the bride. I wanted to talk to her and know how she was feeling. My opportunity came when Carlisle returned to his wife. I approached Bella and she raised her hand to me.
"Thanks for coming." She said.
"I guess I couldn't say no. It's not every day we have free food and drinks." I grimaced.
I wanted to ask her a lot of things but the words never came out.
"How are you dealing with the alpha's business?" She asked.
"Fine. Sam's helping me."
"Irina's still at large."
"She'll never be able to come near La Push again. I'm much stronger now."
"Well I'm just asking you to stay out of troubles while we're gone, okay?"
"No offense but I'm hardly the trouble's magnet, Bella."
"Very funny…" She laughed slightly.
I noticed that Bella was hiding the red colour of her eyes with contact lenses. It was in that precise moment I realised that even though she was my friend and she still had human feelings in her, she was no longer my Bella. She was someone different now.
She was no longer vulnerable or weak; she was a powerful vampire now. Nothing would be the same again and I would have to get over it. So when the music stopped I took Bella over to her husband and left to join Quil, Jared and Embry.
I managed to engage in a few conversations about games and food until my eyes met Paul and Rachel dancing. I had just lost the love of my life to a damn leech, I didn't want to lose my sister too.
I made my way to the dance floor and pulled Rachel away from Paul, who growled deeply. The fact that she was his imprint didn't give him he right to grope her like that.
"What the hell Jake?" Paul reacted immediately.
"You can't touch my sister without my permission." I shot.
"Protective much?" Paul teased. He sure had some death wish.
"Shut up!"
"You're not my father Jake. Let me go." Rachel ordered. "Who the hell do you think you are? Just because you're a few inches taller than before it doesn't make you the…"
"Shut it Rach…before I take you home." I cut her off. She was so annoying sometimes. Couldn't she understand I was doing that for her own sake?
Rachel was completely furious with my attitude by then. She even tried to kick me but failed. I wasn't her baby brother anymore.
"It's my life Jake so leave me alone." She spat when I released her arm.
"He's sixteen, do you know that?" I inquired. I had to play that card while I could.
"Seventeen." Paul corrected.
"Whatever." I dismissed him.
"Go to Hell Jake." Rachel left and joined Sue and my father at their table with a very angry look on her face. She didn't intimidate me with her glares though. She was no Leah Clearwater.
"We both know we are destined to be together and you have to accept that." Paul stated smugly leaving me. I wished I could rip his head off.
I headed over to my sister again and she started to accuse me of wanting to rule her life. If she knew that she would never be able to have her beautiful life outside the Reservation like she had dreamed after Paul had imprinted on her she would probably beg me to kill him but I couldn't tell her that. Not today anyways.
"I'm leaving." She stated stubbornly.
"No way. I'm not going to let you go out of my sight." I replied.
"Well though!"
"I'm going too." Leah announced.
"No." I said.
Leah glared daggers at me and I flinched a little.
"I'm going to keep Rachel a company." She hissed.
"No, you're not." I repeated.
God what was I doing? Why was I preventing Leah from going home with my sister? That would certainly keep Paul away from my house for a while but for some reason I wanted Leah to stay.
"I'll go." Kim offered. Jared was right behind his girlfriend and promised he would control Paul in case he followed them.
"Okay…fine." I accepted.
Leah gave me a murderous look and sat down again. Her eyes caught a glimpse of Sam and Emily dancing and she crossed her arms over her chest in a defensive but oh so sexy way.
As soon as Kim and Rachel left I asked Quil and Embry to stay near Paul and joined Emmett. I knew he wanted to bet about something and I almost chocked when he told me what he had in mind.
"So…Leah or Rosalie?" Emmett said with a smile.
So he wanted to bet on who was the most hostile girl in town. Leah and Rosalie were, of course, the queens of that department.
"Leah. Definitely." I stated.
"Okay…I bet a hundred dollars on my Rose."
"A hundred?" I didn't have all that money.
"Don't you have faith in your…wolverine?" Emmett laughed.
"Of course I do. You're on."
"Okay…then let's prove it, shall we?"
"How?"
"I bet I can kiss the she-wolf before you can convince my Rose to dance."
"Kiss Leah? You have to be joking…you won't even manage to approach her much less kiss her."
"You don't know that. She might have the hots for me."
I laughed. Leah hated all the leeches. No exception. Well maybe she liked Carlisle just a little because he had saved her brother, but that was it.
I thought about Emmett's suggestion. I didn't like the idea of seeing him kiss Leah and I really didn't feel like dancing with the Ice Queen but for a hundred dollars maybe I should give it a try.
Glancing over at Leah one last time before heading over to ask Rosalie for a dance I saw her shooing Embry for the third time rejecting his invitation to dance and I was almost sure she would never let Emmett Cullen kiss her.
Since Emmett hadn't said anything about rules I told Rosalie about the bet and watched her fume in anger.
"Are you going to let Emmett kiss a wolf?" I asked smugly. "He'll stink for at least a month."
"Fine, you won dog." She said and pulled my hand. "Let's dance."
Dancing with Rosalie Hale was a nightmare. That was something I really didn't want to do ever again. She smelled too damn sweet and I was getting sick in my stomach. Thank the Spirits Emmett noticed us and came to speak to me.
"Hands off mutt." He said.
"She's not complaining…" I grinned.
"Are you aware of what you're doing honey?" Emmett asked his wife.
"Yes."
"You're dancing with a mutt." He pointed put.
"You were going to kiss one…I guess we're even." She retorted releasing me.
"You told her?" Emmett asked.
"You never said I couldn't tell her."
"I can't believe this…" Emmett complained.
"You owe me a hundred dollars." I smirked.
"Hey, Jasper…you didn't use your power on Rose to make him win the bet, did you?" The idiot asked his brother.
"Of course not. What fun would that be?" Jasper questioned with an innocent face.
"I almost had the she-wolf around my finger." Emmett complained again.
"You wish." I said. "You don't know Leah like I do. She's not like the others. There's no way you would've kissed her tonight."
"Why not? Don't tell me you're jealous..."
"What? Jealous? Come on! Why would I be jealous…she's just…she's…Leah for crying out loud!"
Okay so that one caught me off guard.
"Jealous? Are you insane? She's...Leah for crying out loud!"
"I think she's hot…" He confessed.
Rosalie hit Emmett on the back of his head and I glanced at Leah again. She was still sitting down, arms crossed and a huge frown. When she noticed I was looking at her she gave me the finger and turned her head the other way. Maybe I should've let her go with Kim and Rachel.
"I'm going to drink another beer…" I announced leaving Emmett and Rosalie arguing in the dance floor.
I ended up drinking at least five more beers and that's why I probably didn't even notice when Bella and Edward left to the airport. So what if they were going on their honeymoon? So what if Bella was going to give herself to that ice cube guy? She was one herself so who cared, right?
I grabbed a bottle of wine and as the moon slowly showed up in the sky I decided to leave the party and headed to First Beach. I needed some time alone. I had too many things in my head and I needed to let go. It wasn't just Bella and her honeymoon, it was also Paul and Rachel, my recently position as alpha and the stupid thoughts about Leah Clearwater.
Emmett was such a jerk. He had planted doubts in my head. I mean why would I be jealous if he really kissed Leah? It was just and bet. Plus she was single and I didn't even like her that much, right? She was bitter, cruel, sarcastic and evil to all of us. No exception. And I knew for a fact that I wasn't her favourite person on the planet either.
Why was I still thinking about her? I should be crying about losing Bella.
I drank a bit of more of wine and lay down on the sand. For a while all I listened to was the sound of the waves. It was relaxing. I closed my eyes and I would've probably fallen asleep if I didn't hear someone walking in my direction.
"What are you doing here?" Leah asked as if she owned the beach.
"Nothing. You?"
"The same." She sat down beside me and took the bottle of wine from my hands. "I prefer whisky."
I sat up and looked at her.
"What?" She asked. "Why are you always looking at me today?"
"I'm not."
"Yes, you are…I'm not going to break down crying. It's not as if this is the worst day of my life…I can't say the same about you though."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're hurting because of her. And the only reason you made me go to the leeches' wedding was because you needed to see someone as broken as you. You used me."
"That's not…true..."
"It's fine...I know you didn't do it on purpose."
I didn't say anything because I didn't have the courage to tell her that the reason why I wanted her close was because looking at her body made me forget Bella temporarily. At least that was my theory. But she also had a point.
"How do you do it?" I asked after a long time in silence.
"You know how. You're constantly in my head…you know how I deal with it."
"Becoming a harpy…That's not very healthy, you know? You should try another way."
"Yeah…Whatever. It doesn't matter anyway."
"Does this pain go away?"
"I don't know. I don't think mine will."
"Do you think…we'll ever fall in love again?"
"You probably will."
"I'm not talking about imprinting."
"Me neither. It's just that you're a good kid Black. You'll eventually forget about Bella, forgive her and the mind rapist and move on. You'll meet a nice girl and you'll be happy."
"What about you?"
She just shrugged.
"I'm not a good person." Her voice was firm which meant she wasn't joking.
What should I say now? Should I comfort her and try to make her feel better? She would know I'd be feeling sorry for her and she'd be pissed off with me.
"Seth and Sue surely disagree with that." I offered.
"They don't know the real me…Do you know what my Dad told me before Sam left me for Emily? He told me he was proud of me and that he couldn't wait to see me getting married and having kids. He said I was his princess…and do you know what happened then?"
I knew what she had been through but I let her talk. This was actually the first time she was talking about her feelings.
"The next week Sam dumped me and then I turned into a fucking giant dog, I probably lost my chance to be happy and to have children and I caused my dad's heart attack. I'm responsible for my mother and my brother's pain…for Emily's, for Sam's and even the whole pack. I got you all suffering with me because I'm a selfish bitch. I worth nothing. No one will ever look at me or want me for that matter. I feel invisible and lonely…You should've let that newborn vampire kill me, Black. I deserved it. I'm not like you. I'm a bad person!"
"Hey…come on…"
"Can't you see? I want to die! Why can't I just die? No one would miss me!" She got up and drank the rest of the wine. Then out of the blue she started to take off her dress.
"What the hell are you doing?" I asked getting up and turning my back to her.
"I'm going to try something."
"Put your dress back on." I begged.
"Tonight is a good night to die."
I was pretty sure that was the alcohol talking. I could smell it and I knew Leah had been drinking before she had joined me on the beach. I just never thought she was actually serious so I only reacted when I heard a splash on the water.
"What the hell are you doing, Clearwater?" I yelled watching her naked form diving.
I scanned the sand and saw all of her clothes there even her underwear. She was really drunk to do something like that and I was really stupid to think that I'd be able to pull her out of the water without getting my ass kicked.
"Leah! Come back!" I yelled again but she was gone under the water. "Shit!"
I took my tie, my shoes and my white shirt off and dived after her. Thank the Spirits I was a strong wolf and could see perfectly underwater. I found her and pulled her up with me but as soon as we hit the surface she started to fight me off.
"Let me go! I want to die! Don't touch me!" She screamed.
"Shut up! You're way out of line! Be quiet!"
I practically dragged her with me and when we reached the sand she kept on squirming and I felt a sharp pain when her knee made contact with my groin.
"Fuck! Are you crazy?" I let her go and regretted it immediately because she went to the water again.
I grabbed her wrist and pulled her down and into the sand. I couldn't let her go to the water again and I had to find a way to immobilise her. I lay down on top of her and noticed she had started crying.
"Don't cry, please." I asked softly. I did think she was a harpy but I had no pleasure watching her pain.
"Why can't I just disappear? I'm worthless. Everyone would be better off without me."
"Leah…You're not worthless, you're a protector. You have a mission…Just don't give up."
"No one needs me."
"That's not true. I need you." I lied.
"What for?"
"I need you to be my second in command." I blurted out the first thing that came to my mind. "Will you be my beta?"
She looked directly into my eyes and a small smile appeared in her pink lips.
"Really? What about Sam?" She asked.
"Never mind Sam. I'm asking you."
"You want me to be your beta?" She repeated.
"Yes. I think you're perfect for the job. That way you can show the guys your leading qualities."
"I have qualities?"
I nodded and it was then I became aware of how close we really were. I was lying on top of her, my hands were holding both of her wrists on each side of her head and my legs were straddling her so she couldn't move.
Our noses were almost touching and I couldn't help to think about how good it was to feel her naked body pressed up against mine. Suddenly I felt really hot and I looked at her eyes. I could kiss her to see how she tasted like, I could even try to feel her body. I would blame it on the alcohol and my hormones later but then again that wouldn't be such a smart move.
I didn't want to take advantage on her. She was drunk and I had just lost the girl of my dreams. I wanted my first time to be with someone who loved me even though I didn't mind if she had a gorgeous body like Leah's and those beautiful hazel eyes.
"Jacob…" She whispered sending a shiver down my spine. I never thought her voice would have that effect on me. "Your belt is hurting me."
My belt? I was pretty sure it wasn't my belt she was feeling. I felt my face heating up and prayed she wouldn't notice. She would never let me live down to it and even worse, the whole pack would know.
A few seconds went by and I made no effort to move or let her go. I was still considering the idea of kissing her besides if I got up I would have a clear view to her naked body and my "belt" could reveal himself to Leah.
"Do you want to seal the deal?" She asked and I was momentarily confused. Was she making me a sexual offer? Because I was tempted to say yes.
"What deal?" I asked stupidly.
"The beta thing…You're not changing your mind, are you?"
I shook my head no and sighed in relief.
"How are we going to seal the deal?"
She bit her bottom lip, which made my "belt" wake up again, and smiled. God she was killing me. Literally.
"I'll cook you breakfast tomorrow." She offered.
Was she really being nice to me? That was a first.
"Breakfast? In bed?"
"If you want to. But I'm not sleeping with you. You're not my type."
"You're not my type either." I said immediately feeling a bit self-conscious about our situation and then I finally got up. What I was feeling for her was wrong in too many levels. I had to put myself together and fight off this stupid and wild attraction. Wolf hormones sucked big time.
"Really? Well your belt doesn't agree with your words." She grinned mischievously.
I went to pick up her dress to hide my embarrassment and she followed me.
"Don't worry Jake…I guess that's just a normal and healthy human…and manly reaction." She said still amused. "Unless…" Her voice dropped.
"Just shut up Leah."
"Were you thinking about Bella?"
I faced her with a fierce expression but she wasn't scared.
"What if I was?" I retorted and she looked a bit disappointed.
"Forget it…You're just an idiot. Bella is not even a real woman anymore. Just move on…asshole."
She ripped the dress out of my hands and put it on quickly. Now I was the one disappointed. Me and my "belt". Leah should walk around naked more often.
"Don't forget about my breakfast tomorrow." I told her while she was walking away.
"Don't worry…I won't." She replied and for some reason I felt a chill.
As far as I knew Leah could cook but the way she had spoken made me wonder. Maybe she was planning on poisoning me? I shook my head to erase those thoughts and lay down again on the sand. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I was tired. Not physically but mentally and emotionally.
As I drifted off to sleep all I could think about wasn't Bella, Edward and their honeymoon. I just kept wondering why I hadn't thought about Bella when I was with Leah? I had non-innocent fantasies with Bella often but now…something had changed. I could feel it in my bones. I just couldn't understand why I had let Bella be replaced so quickly and on top of it by none other than Leah Clearwater…La Push's bitter harpy and my soon to be beta. She would make my life miserable. What the hell was I thinking?
"Shit." I mumbled just before falling asleep.
To be continued...
A/Note 2: Dedicated to all the Blackwater fans out there!
Have a happy New Year!
Take care, Karisan