Summer, 1932
"But, Angela, I just don't understand it! Why can't she find a girl to play with? You need to do something about this. You're going to regret it if you don't. It's bad enough she insists on running around in pants half of the time."
Angela Dashwood chuckled. It had never been a question in her mind whether or not her debutante mother would appreciate the spirited nature of her only child. Audrey was not a loud child, nor even a trying one. She had her moments, but the thing about Audrey was that she did what she wished. Once she made up her mind that was it. No words were said; she simply did it. If she wanted to borrow Joe's pants because they were easier to run around in, she did. If she wanted to play soldiers and Germans with Joe in the forest instead of with dolls, she did. If she wanted to run about the town as best friends with Joseph Toye, she did just that. And for the last five years, since the age of six, she had.
"Mother, I don't think we have much choice." She gazed fondly out the window to see her daughter and her best friend running after each other about the yard. The two women could hear their laughter through the open window and the occasional yell of 'Patches' and 'Toye Boy.'
"If we told Audrey that she and Joe couldn't be friends anymore, she'd be devastated for all of ten seconds. Then she'd get up and go see him anyway. You may not see it, mother, but she's just as stubborn as you are. Sometimes I wish that wasn't the quality she'd inherited from you, might I add. Besides that, Joe Toye is a nice boy. He's like the sibling she never had. What's the harm?"
Straightening up even more in her chair—if that possible with her already ramrod straight back and overly tightened corset—Mrs. Arlington sniffed into her coffee, "Still, it isn't right. What's going to happen when they get older? They're already too old to have one of the opposite sex for a best friend. She's going on, what, eleven in September? How old does that make him?"
"Thirteen, mother. And no, they are not too old. They've been friends for the last five years we've lived here. Henry works in the mines with Joe's father and Laura is one of the kindest neighbors I've ever had. The Toyes are good people and I must say it's rather nice that Audrey has someone her own age." Angela was beginning to get rather annoyed with this persistent conversation topic. It came up every time her mom came to visit and every visit Audrey disliked her grandmother more.
"You're going to regret it once he hits that age, my dear." She raised an eyebrow knowingly over her cup of tea.
At that, Angela began to freely chuckle. The very idea that Joe Toye would do anything untoward to Audrey was beyond comical. Her mother apparently didn't know it, but there was nothing but brotherly and sisterly love coming from the two. Audrey never let a mean word be said about Joe without another ten to counter. Joe threatened to kill anyone who looked at Audrey the wrong way. Angela doubted that would change. While it would probably make her laugh if it happened, she doubted the two would ever fall in love with each other. Their love just wasn't like that.
"Mother, you can't see it, but they take care of each other. And not just through the small things, but through everything. While they were playing in the forest last week, Joe got a slash the length of his forearm and Audrey refused to leave his side. She just led him straight into the kitchen and started cleaning it. I swear she would've put the stitches in herself if that's what it had required! Mother, I'm not breaking the two up. Even if I tried, it wouldn't do any good."
Attempting a new avenue, ignoring very determinedly the fact her granddaughter had been touching that boy's bloody arm, Mrs. Arlington nodded toward the piano in the corner of the room, "And what does the amazing Joe Toye do for her music besides provide distraction? She is great, Angela. You know that. We can't let a boy get in the way."
"Nor would I ever let one. However, I am not going to force Audrey into becoming one of those poor children who are forced to sit at their instrument for hours every day until she hates it. When she practices, Joe sits on the floor beside and does his homework during the school year and in the summer he reads a book. She's even taught him a little."
"Is that going to continue to be how it is? If you'd push her she could be the next great prodigy. The school in Strasbourg has expressed interest after I sent them a letter, especially because she plays both piano and violin so very well. It would be better if she could sing, too," she continued on to herself.
Decidedly picking up the coffee pot and taking the dish from her mother's hand, Angela said firmly, "I would rather she be happy than great. Mother, she is my daughter. Leave it be. If she wishes to pursue music when she is older and Strasbourg still wants her, we'll talk about it. Until then, she is my responsibility, not yours!"
Unaware of the tension in the room, a quiet, musical voice asked with dark blue eyes looking up at her, "Hi, mommy. Can Joe and I have a snack?"
Smiling at the sound, Angela turned and replied, "Of course, darling. There's some bread and peach jam in the kitchen. How is your arm today, Joe?"
In a similarly quiet voice that had just begun to change, the young man with hair far darker than Audrey's dark blonde and large brown eyes answered, "Much better, Mrs. Dashwood. The doctor said the cut will be fine. I'll have a scar, but he said he hardly had to rewrap it. Audrey's was top notch."
Smiling, the mother nodded, "Oh, I have no doubt. The look of determination on her face made sure of it. Go ahead and grab your snacks." Audrey, appearing to dread every moment of it, took the few steps toward her grandmother and gave her a clearly awkward hug before sprinting from the room.
Winter 1935
"Joe…? Joe, what're you doing?" Audrey tilted her head to the side, trying to figure out what she was looking at.
Freezing where he sat, Joe quickly shook his head from his eyes had been closed and made his hands hold the book in his lap instead of conduct absently. They hadn't just been doing that. Coughing quickly, he closed the book and ignored her question, "What was that? You've never played it before."
Grinning at the reddening of her best friend's cheeks, she replied, "It's Handel's 'Messiah'. It's catchy, isn't it?" He refused to look at her and she grinned. She'd seen him sitting there conducting with his hands, not reading a word of his homework. "Here, come on, we'll work on your "Für Elise" and Rhapsody in Blue instead." She scooted over on the piano bench, making room for him.
Joe rose and sat beside her, elbowing her until she fell off to the floor for good measure. Laughing loudly, she got up and pushed him back. When they finally calmed down again to focus, she brushed her shoulder against his, "Joe, you'll always be my best friend, no matter what anyone says."
Smirking back at her, understanding the sincerity in her statement, he teased, "No one but me could put up with you, Patches."
Gasping, she punched him hard in the arm, "Speak of yourself, Toye Boy!"
She enforced his impromptu lesson with an iron fist for the next ten minutes until his Rhapsody in Blue was flawless. He'd perfected Beethoven long ago. She was glad he shared at least a bit of her love and passion for music. It made her feel less guilty that she was spending so much more time on it lately, leaving him bored she suspected.
She didn't realize that Joe loved every minute of hearing her practice, whether it was piano or violin. She was incredible and it felt right just to stay with her. Who didn't want a radio without commercials?
Sighing and leaning against a dissonant chord, Joe stated, "Audrey, I think I'm going to quit school next year. I'll finish this one out, but I don't want keep going. I'll get a job at the mine. We need the money."
Looking at him quizzically, head tilted to the side so her long brown braid swung off her shoulder, Audrey questioned, "Are you sure?"
"Yeah." Now that he actually said it out loud when questioned, he felt sure. He also felt sure she would support him, an immensely good feeling.
"Okay. Can I bring you your lunch when I don't have school?!"
Laughing, Joe nodded, "Only if you pack good stuff in it and don't eat it."
Pressing a hand to her emotionally wounded heart, she declared, "Would I do that to you?!"
He didn't think a second before answering, "Yes, you fucking would!" She just grinned, not denying it as she turned back to the piano. Joe knew her too well, just like she knew him too well.
Autumn 1936
"Joe, what's this part do?"
Looking over with clear preoccupation, a seventeen-year-old Joe replied, "That's the alternator. It deals with all the electrical stuff. Give me a wrench." Frowning with amused exasperation, he handed what he'd just been given right back. He did not need the biggest wrench he owned. Voice level as always, he continued, "A smaller one, please, Patches."
Laughing, she did as he asked before leaning back over the engine of the Toyes' vehicle. Joe was convinced he knew how to fix it, explaining why they'd been banging and pounding on the poor metal for the last two hours. Audrey didn't know much about cars, but there were just so many parts, she had to know. Curiosity was a fatal flaw with her.
Despite how she liked to tease him about his mechanical talents, the lengthiness of their task was due more to her incessant questions than Joe's competence. Smiling again, anticipating the annoyed sigh that was about to come, she queried, "What's that one?"
Sigh.
Leaning over to look in the direction she was, Joe answered, "The battery, you numbskull. Go get me a sandwich."
"You just ate. You can't be hungry again. Besides, you can get your own damn sandwich. How about that one?"
"The carburetor."
"What's it do?"
"It lets air mix with the fuel so it'll ignite when the sparkplug sparks in the piston. Flathead screwdriver, Patches."
"Yes, sir, Captain Toye Boy." Raising an eyebrow at her amused sass, he just shook his head. Sometimes being Audrey's best friend was very trying.
He loved her anyway.
Late Summer 1937
Joe frowned as he came up out of the mine at the whistle to find Audrey collapsed onto the ground, sobbing her heart out into her dark blue skirt. As Henry Dashwood's daughter and Joe's best friend, she was known to almost everyone at the mine and a small circle of confused workers had gathered around her. It appeared they hadn't gotten a word out of her, though.
They let Joe through without a word and he knelt beside her, squeezing her shoulder, "Patches…?" He was greeted with another hiccupping sob that seemed to come all the way from her toes. Glancing down at them, he found her feet bare, black, and the hell was going on?
"Audrey, what's the matter? Where are your shoes?"
She just looked up at him and continued crying. He was more than a bit perturbed by then. Audrey was a teenage girl, but she didn't cry that much. He could count the number of times on one hand. She just refused to let life make her cry. She tried too damn hard to make things good. On the rare occasion she did, she hid away from anything alive and breathing that wasn't her mother or him. He immediately wondered what truly terrible thing had happened to cause this very public sobbing.
Kneeling down, Joe hugged her tightly and queried, "Patches, what happened?"
Cinching her arms around his neck, Audrey buried her face into his chest but said nothing. While she didn't cry often, when she did she was a blubbering, talking mess and he always knew exactly what was wrong. This silence was scaring him. Hesitantly, he tried, "Do I need to beat somebody up?"
She gave a watery laugh at that which came out with more pain than humor before shaking her head, "No…" Face dissolving into one of extreme grief, she choked out, "Joe, my-my parents just died."
He jerked back and held her at arms' length, "What?!"
Breaking down anew, she nodded. Despite words and thoughts and worries running through her mind a mile a minute, they only came out as stunted pieces of an explanation. "They took the car. There was a truck... The sheriff was waiting outside the house when I got home from school. My shoes are at home. I ran here. It was a long way… Joe…they're dead."
"Shit, Patches, I'm so sorry." Joe pulled her close again, for a long moment at a loss for what to say, something that hadn't happened in the ten years they had been best friends.
Sensing this, Audrey's muffled voice came out of his shirt, "Don't say anything, Joe. Just stay with me. I just need someone to stay."
"Okay."
Winter 1937
"What do you mean you're leaving?"
Joe stared at Audrey in shock, disbelief engraved into his expression. He'd wondered what she was going to spring on him when he came home from the mines that day to find her sitting in the snow on the front steps in her coat and a pair of his boots. Audrey was a wimp when it came to cold. He saw the way her fingers began to twitch, needing an instrument in her nervous state, when she didn't answer right away.
Her sentences were short, almost like she hadn't processed the information yet either, when she finally said, "My grandma came today. She's my guardian now. She's making me go to the music school in France. She wants me to be a female Mozart."
"You hate Mozart. You like Beethoven better," he protested, not completely grasping much else to protest to yet.
A smile broke through her tears, "So do you."
Everything was silent for a long moment, the snow falling silently about them. Joe was still wrapping his head around it. How could she be leaving? The longest they were ever apart was the nine hours a day he worked. For the past four months, the time apart when they slept had even gone away. She'd been sleeping in his room, in her old bed they'd dragged across the yard together, with him ever since her parents died. She insisted that he wake her up when he left for work at 4am so she wouldn't wake up alone. At the beginning, she'd refused to let go of his hand when she fell asleep at night, their arms simply spanned the distance between them.
Her leaving felt like he was losing that arm. It was like he was losing a part of him. How was he supposed to do that?
As he didn't answer, Audrey felt her heart sink even more. She stepped forward and hugged him, leaning her head against his chest where her height allowed. "Joe," she whispered, "I don't want to go. I want to stay."
Returning the hug, Joe replied more heatedly, "Then, stay. Don't go to Strasbourg."
"I can't. Grandma has legal custody of me. She's got my boat ticket already. I've already been accepted to the school. She says term starts the end of January." Her sentences were still painfully blunt, her shock stripping her of any of the small amount of eloquence she usually had.
"You'll come back, won't you?"
She squeezed harder, "The minute I turn eighteen and have the money… You won't get married without me, will you?"
Snorting loudly, flicking the back of her head affectionately, "Who am I going to marry? I won't know if she's going to be an old hag in a year without you. Get married without you," he rolled his eyes.
Smiling again, she smacked his arm, "Hey, it's a fair request!"
Wrapping a dirty, coal dust-covered arm around her shoulders, Joe kissed her temple, "Come on, Audrey, before you freeze. You pansy."
Smacking him in the gut, making him gasp, she grinned, "No, I always imagined myself more of a bright yellow iris, happy and laid back."
Catching his breath, Joe snorted, "No, Patches, you're a really deep red rose: dark, beautiful, and with plenty of thorns." She laughed at that and kissed him on the cheek. He had her there.
"You're still not getting married without me."
January 1938
Audrey finally stopped staring at her shoes as Mrs. Toye gathered her into one final hug. Laura Toye had become the finest surrogate mother a girl could ever hope for, far beyond what Audrey could've asked for. The Toyes had become her family without a second thought of the money or the difficulties it might present. Audrey loved them for it more than she could express.
Mr. Toye was next in line, telling her during a fatherly embrace that if she ever needed anything they were going to be waiting for her at home.
She didn't wait for him to say anything before she just wrapped her arms around Joe's neck and held on tight, not allowing herself to cry. He hadn't said a word all day and neither had she. It had been painfully silent, despite the quiet natures of them both. Everything was changing too quickly. She wanted to cling to Joe and the life she loved for as long as possible.
She buried herself in the black fabric of his jacket and how it smelled like coal and the silly cologne he wore when he went on dates or somewhere important. It smelled good; she just enjoyed making fun of him for it. To be honest, she was flattered he considered showing her off important enough for cologne. She could feel the stubble he hadn't shaved off yet against her cheek. She remembered teasing him about it when he first started having facial hair. He'd been worse the first time he'd seen her wear make-up.
So much of her life had had Joe beside her to experience it. She'd just lost her parents. Audrey was far from sure she could handle losing him, too. It felt like her heart had already been ripped in two and now it was being smashed into tinier pieces.
Joe pulled away, staring at his feet and refusing to look at her as he pulled something out of his jacket. "Here, I got this for you. That music teacher at school helped…"
With shaking hands, she relieved his grip of a folder of music entitled in his handwriting "The Joe Toye Collection." She flipped it open to find the inside cover held a table of contents. All of her favorite pieces for piano and violin were there. Moonlight Sonata, Claire de Lune, Rhapsody in Blue, Tchaikovsky, Beethoven, and Bach were all there, waiting for her to play and love. Sitting in the back was also a hardbound book with a dark blue cover. She looked at the spine and found that it read Sense & Sensibility.
Joe's eyes stayed firmly on his feet when he mumbled in explanation, "The girls in it have your last name. I thought you might like it."
Ignoring the whistling of the train and the irritated admonishments of her grandmother, Audrey just smiled up at her best friend, content to make the moment last as long as humanly possible. Sensing her gaze, he looked up to return her smile. "I'm gonna miss you, Patches."
Hugging him again, she breathed, "I love you, Joe." It was true but she wasn't sure she'd ever actually said it. Joe was her best friend and she loved him like a brother. Now was the last time in a long time she'd get to say it. She'd never felt so sure of doing a thing in her life.
Not hesitating for a moment, he replied, "I love you, too, Audrey."
Audrey's gaze was still drawn back to the platform as the train rounded a corner and was cut off from view of her home. The Toyes were gone but she kept her nose pressed against the cold glass, unable to let them go quite yet. Her music and book were clutched in her mitten-clad hand, gripping them like a lifeline. They lay on the green fabric of her skirt in her lap, apparently unaware of their significance.
Mrs. Arlington leaned forward after the first ten miles of awkward silence and grabbed for the folder, "What music did that boy give you, Audrey? Anything decent?"
Immediately pulled from her trance, Audrey snatched the folder back from her grandmother's searching hands, only just keeping herself from slapping them. "It's none of your business," she said with coldly.
Perturbed by that rudeness, Jennifer sat stiffly back in her seat. If Audrey was going to be ungrateful for this opportunity, then she wasn't going to extend any pleasantries, either. "You're going to have to forget all about that boy, girl. I don't care how in love with him you are. You'll probably never see him again. You're going to make something of yourself if it kills me and he's going to go nowhere but back to that mine. Think about that."
Unable to hold back a smile that reminded the grandmother spookily of her daughter, Audrey just looked at her, "Any woman in the world would be lucky to have Joe Toye love her. He's the best man I know. But, I'm not in love with him. He's my best friend. There's a difference." The young woman appeared prepared to say much, much more but, sighing, just rolled her eyes and looked back out the window.
How could she not understand? How had everything gotten so sideways? What was the point in trying to talk to this woman who apparently didn't really know her at all?
The rest of the train ride was quiet as a tomb, as were the cab, hotel stay, and ride to the boat. Audrey was too sad and her grandmother was too sure she was right to allow herself to be swayed by anything. Audrey could only lift her hand in a wave to her grandmother as she sailed away from everything and everyone she'd ever known.
A/N: Hello there everyone!
First of all, I own nothing, etc, etc, etc.
Secondly, to be completely honest, I probably shouldn't even be putting this story up. I don't have a whole lot of plot ideas or semantics figured out. All I have is a character idea and a couple of scenes that just won't leave me alone. I've written Band of Brothers fics before, but I was much younger and they always turned out Mary-Sues. I'm hoping to change that with this one, but I'll just admit upfront that I haven't the faintest idea on update consistency or anything. Reviews always manage to give me a kick where I need it, so maybe it'll pick up. :)
So, let me know if you have any ideas at all. I'd love to hear them! Thanks for reading, and I hope you stick with me and enjoy. :)