Disclaimer: I don't own Hannah Montana.
Author's note: This is set in an alternate version of season 3 or 4 of Hannah Montana. Enjoy!
Hit the road, Mike!
Oliver Oken enters the backstage-area at the Chicago House of Rock. Oliver is wearing his favorite version of his Mike Standley-outfit.
"I'm hangin' out with Hannah cuz I'm more than just a fan-ah. Gonna rock and make a mess, yeah I'm fricky fricky fresh. Yo!" says Oliver as he does some hip hop-moves.
"Hey! Show some style, Mike!" says Hannah.
"Why? I shall always be right here and I'll never show my fear!" says Oliver.
"If you say fricky fricky fresh, you're goin' home, okey?" says Hannah as she give Oliver an evil look.
"Sorry, but I still haven't got a rule-book!" says Oliver.
"Like I told ya a thousand times..." says Hannah. "The golden rule of Hannah Montana's backstage-life is, be cool, be calm and..."
"Look, it's Clair Torres!" says a very excited Lola.
"Be anything other than that!" says Hannah.
"Hannah, look!" says Lola.
"Miss Lola, since when are ya excited about a girl...?" says Hannah confused.
"Look at her! She's kind of hot, isn't she?" says Lola.
"Funky girl-bud say what...?" says Hannah.
"Stay back my ladies and let the Oken-Captain show you how to hit Bull's Eye!" says Oliver as he walk over to Clair.
"Lola, knock me out so I don't have to see this fuckin' disaster!" says Hannah with her sarcastic voice.
"Hi, baby!" says Oliver to Clair.
"I'm not your baby, but hi anyway. I'm Clair Torres!" says Clair.
"I know! You're awesome in your new movie." says Oliver. "You're hot!"
"Thanks...?" says Clair.
"It's Mike! Mike Standley, the third." says Oliver.
"Oh! Thanks, Mike!" says Clair as she give Oliver a kiss.
"Man, I can't believe it!" says Lola to Hannah. "One little kiss from some freakin' top model-slut and suddenly he doesn't even remember his Lilly-Pop!"
"I'm sure he's just bein' nice to her. Oliver...I mean Mike, would never cheat on ya, Lola." says Hannah.
"I hope so..." says Lola in a sad voice.
"Of course, I've been wrong before..." says Hannah as she sees Mike and Clair make out as if they were boyfriend and girlfriend.
"No!" says Lola as she run into the bathroom and close the door.
Lola pull of her wig and transform back into Lilly and begin to cry.
"Why did Oliver do that...?" says Lilly through her tears.
At the same time Oliver and Clair are on their way out to Clair's limo.
"Mike, aren't ya forgetting something?" screams Hannah, but Oliver doesn't hear her.
Lilly comes back out from the bathroom, her make-up a big mess since she's been crying. "Where's Mike da Fake?" says Lilly.
"Sorry..." says Hannah. "He and Clair left a few seconds ago."
"That freakin' stupid Clair-lovin' shit-head who never was in love with me!" says a very angry Lilly.
"I'm so sorry, Lils..." says Hannah as she does her best to comfort her friend.
"I thought he was in love with me..." says Lilly as she begin to cry again.
"I didn't see it comin' either. None of us did." says Hannah.
Later at the Stewart's house Miley plays the piano as Lilly enter the room still wearing her Lola-outfit except for the wig.
"Hi, Miley..." says Lilly in a sad voice.
"Hi, Lils! Feelin' a little better now, do ya?" says Miley with a smile.
"A little..." says Lilly. "I've been crying since we came home..."
"Aaww, Lilly!" says Miley as she give her friend a hug.
"Miley, you're the best friend in the whole world!" says Lilly.
"Thanks, Lils!" says Miley.
Miley sit down at the piano and start to play and sing.
Hit the road, Mike. Don't ya come back. Hit the road, Mike. Don't ya come back no more, no more, no more.
Hit the road, Mike. Don't ya come back. Hit the road, Mike. Don't ya come back no more, no more, no more.
"So, Lilly..." says Miley. "What do ya wanna do? Eat comfort-food and watch a silly little chick-movie? Listen to some girl punk-songs and scream it all out?"
"I already ate a big load of strawberry ice cream, so no comfort-food at the moment and I'm not in the mood for girl punk. Just hug me Miley and be here for me." says Lilly in a soft voice.
"Sure, girl bud!" says Miley as she give Lilly a hug.
"Aaww, Miley!" says Lilly.
"I'm always here for ya, Lils!" says Miley.
"Thanks, Miley!" says Lilly with a soft voice as she begin to smile.
"You're me very best friend, Lillian Truscott! I hate seein' ya sad, girl." says Miley.
"Miley..." is all that Lilly can think of to say at the moment.
"So, I'm right here for ya, Lilly my dear!" says Miley with a smile.
"Thank you so much!" says Lilly.
The End.