30 Sure-Fire Ways to Annoy the Heck Out of Vlad Masters
1: Dial his phone, then beat him to it. Sit there talking to nobody for a looong time, and don't let him get the phone. Then, whenever he leaves the room, laugh and say loudly, where he can hear you: "No, sorry, Vlad just left... Really? That's too bad. I'll talk to you later, Maddie!" Then hang up as he breaks down the door trying to get to the phone.
2: Tell him his ponytail is girly.
3: Ask him about the sissy-girly bow around his neck.
4: Convince him to put his hair down. When he does, scream "Ohmygawd Riku!! 3" and pounce him.
5: Whenever he enters a room, sing in a high-pitched, squeeky voice, "Lonely... I'm s-lonely. I have nobody... to call my own!"
6: Insist that his ghost half is a vampire who comes to life when he sleeps. Just for emphasis, draw some bite-marks on your neck and blame him.
7: Whenever he says something, say "that's what she said," whether it makes since or not. It'll drive him crazy.
8: Make a point of emphasizing that Maddie and Jack make the CUTEST couple.
9: Ask him why he impersonates Sean Connery when he talks.
10: Ask his age.
11: Tell him he needs to mix up his wardrobe a little.
12: Insist over and over that he try online dating.
13: Tell him that your football team kicks the Packers' butts.
14: Buy him a shirt for his birthday that reads "I Love Fruitloops."
15: Pester him about his interest in Valerie. When he gets angry, insist that she's too young or him.
16: Do the same for Danny.
17: Make fun of the "Plasmius Maximus." (that name is just too funny)
18: Tell him that he's just a bad closet Dracula wannabe.
19: Reprogram his holo-Maddie to look like Jack. Be sure to leave the same dialogue and voice attributes.
20: Insist he drop his pride and come up with his own battle cry because you know he's dying to.
21: Whenever he starts talking lovey-dovey about Maddie, point at him and shout "Homewrecker!!"
22: When he's battling Danny, whenever he opens his mouth to throw an insult, make a loud HONK sound.
23: Ask him why he gets a sick satisfaction out of beating up children.
24: Break out the puppets at an embarassing time and give him the talk.
25: Ask him if plastic surgery hurts.
26: Write him a letter from a secret admirer asking him to meet them in a dark, secluded place. Send an identical letter to Danny.
27: Ask him if he's ever considered therapy.
28: Look at him suddenly and scream "What's that glowing zit doing on your face?!"
29: Re-decorate his entrance hall with Danny Phantom fan-gear. Invite Danny over.
30: Whenever he's petting Maddie (the cat), roll your eyes and tell him that he should work on his Dr. Evil impression.
