Dragon Age: Origins and the characters contained within remain the property of Bioware. I am just borrowing them for a bit.
Below was largely how my first play through turned out (with some artistic license on my part) and I don't have any problems with this particular outcome. As devastated as I was by Alistair's sacrifice, it seemed like this was something he needed to do. Though I will add that I absolutely took Morrigan's bargain on all my subsequent games – losing Alistair once was enough!
At the time, I felt as though the whole thing rushed past very quickly with no chance to absorb what was about to happen. And then were the post-battle celebrations, in which no-one seemed to care overmuch that Alistair had died. So I thought I might try my hand at an introspective account of these events. This is my first (possibly only) attempt at fanfiction, so feedback and reviews are welcome.
Chapter One: The End.
The wind howled forlornly atop Fort Drakon, the hot, dry air fanning the fires left behind by the Archdemon. The skies above were also alight with the same fiery hue, tainting the very air with the stench of blood and smoke. Far below, unaware of the events atop the tower, the assembled armies continued to rage at one another. The faint cries of men and darkspawn in their death throes echoed faintly up to where we stood, trembling with exhaustion.
For us, the battle was nearly over. The Archdemon had been met in combat and we had prevailed. The dragon itself lay dying, each rasping breath a gurgling chorus of blood and phlegm. From its lidded eyes, glazed with agony and exhaustion, one might almost believe it was resigned to its fate. Nevertheless, the razor sharp teeth promised to shred anyone foolish enough to venture close.
The primal ferocity of our battle was evident in our battered and bloodied state. Wynne was breathing haggardly beside me, her silver hair almost singed away from the deadly breath of the creature. From across the ramparts, Alistair approached us, his once fine armour rent by the claws of endless hordes of darkspawn and painted red by their blood and gore as he cut them down with great sweeps of his sword.
Over time our technique had become so attuned that it was nearly akin to dancing. Side by side, my shield would absorb a staggering blow and he would lunge for the opening the enemy so carelessly presented. Then I would follow with a flurry of fast, deadly swipes that left our opponent reeling. The dragon was not so easily defeated, but we had held our own until the darkspawn had begun to flood out from the staircase bringing with them their deadly emissaries. As a bolt of lightning slammed into my side, nearly causing me to drop my shield, Alistair had grimly met my gaze and nodded. He withdrew to protect our flank even as I continued to battle the dragon, Wynne standing close by to bathe me with healing magic.
And then it had been over, the dragon collapsing in steaming, grunting heap. "Where is Zev?" I scanned the murky horizon, my eyes narrowed as I searched for the blonde assassin. Moments earlier, though it seemed much longer, he had run off towards the ballistas, intent upon harnessing their lethal potential. "Keep doing what you are doing," he had yelled cheekily as he nimbly dodged a swipe of the dragon's tail before disappearing amidst the chaos.
"I am right behind you, as always." I slowly turned towards the smirking voice. Unbelievably, the Antivan looked completely untouched by fire or blood or any of the other foul substances that seemed to cling to the rest of us. "Show-off." I muttered, just loud enough for him to hear. He shrugged one shoulder eloquently though his eyes glittered with the triumph of victory.
Then Alistair looked at me. Our eyes locked and everything else became still as I forgot to breathe. Dimly I was aware that Zevran and Wynne were watching us. Waiting.
Waiting for us. The last remaining Grey Wardens.
The knowledge of what must surely come to pass in the next few moments burned within my breast, far more devastating than the scorching flames of the defeated Archdemon.
One of us must die. With Riordan slain, it falls to either Alistair or I.
The pain began to ease as I felt a sense of peace sweep through my body, the path unfolding before me. I would be the one; that was as the Maker intended it should be. Everything in my life had led me to this point: the deaths of my family, Duncan, Cailan. Even Loghain. The toll was indeed high, but not yet complete. My death would finish the journey. And in doing so, Alistair would live. That mattered above all else.
I squashed the gnawing tendrils of doubt that suggested I should have taken Morrigan's unholy deal; that I should have at least offered Alistair the chance to make his own decision. But I hadn't even endured telling Alistair of her bargain, wracked with the feeling of wrongness that infused me. And thus I had returned to the witch with my refusal, knowing that the price might be my very life. And, strange as it seemed, I was content with that knowledge.
I became aware that Alistair was speaking. His voice washed over me at first, so surreal was the certainty of my impending death. Then the meaning of his words slowly dawned upon me. He intended to sacrifice himself to save Ferelden. To save me...
But this was supposed to be MY decision. This is why I refused Morrigan. The irony was exquisitely painful. The bitter realisation that she may have been right after all tasted like ashes in my mouth.
"I won't let you die either, Alistair." The words sounded like gravel and I swallowed convulsively. I became strangely conscious of the sound of my heart pounding, the trickle of blood and sweat down my cheek, the sting of clawed flesh.
He smiled sadly, eyes full of infinite tenderness. His gaze would haunt me to the end of my days. "You say that as if I'm giving you a choice." So good we were at making decisions for the benefit of the other. It did not feel quite the same on the receiving end. I could not look away as he reached out one hand to cup my face gently. Alistair's eyes shone with the depth of his feeling, the ghost of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. I half wondered if he were debating whether or not to make a wry joke. Then he glanced past me, his face all at once grave as he gave an unspoken signal. Strong, wiry arms seized me from behind.
"No! Alistair…" I didn't even recognise my own voice, hoarse with terror. "I love you, don't do this!" With sickened realisation, I knew that he had taken the decision out of my hands.
His face was set with resolve as he turned from me.
I struggled in vain against the restraining arms. "Let me go, damn you!" It was Zevran holding me back, his skilled fingers unerringly finding the pressure point in my neck that would hinder movement.
As if in a dream, I watched Alistair begin to run across the flagstones. Seizing an abandoned sword, its former owner a blackened lump of flesh, he lowered the point and charged straight at the fallen dragon. It grimly raised his head and roared at him, but its true strength was already spent. He half-dove, half-slid underneath the great, snaking neck and thrust the sword upwards into unprotected flash. The creature screamed anew and writhed, the severed arteries showering the Grey Warden in a fountain of blood.
As its head fell to the ground, I could see Alistair pause, catching his breath.
There was still time.
I jerked my head back against Zevran with jarring force and simultaneously slammed one armoured heel into his shin. The Antivan grunted with pain as my assault connected. Despite his swift reflexes, the advantage was now mine and I seized the opportunity to escape. Wrenching free, I half-ran, half-scrambled towards where Alistair stood, poised, over the helpless body of the dragon.
Too late.
With an savage cry he raised his sword and plunged it down into the Archdemon's brain.
There was silence for a heartbeat before a beacon of light erupted from the fallen dragon, suffusing the Grey Warden's body and stretching towards the heavens.
"Alistair," I whispered soundlessly as I watched my lover writhing in the radiant glow. His face showed the struggle, twisting in an agony that I couldn't even imagine. I tried to move closer but the light pulsed brighter, blinding me.
Then everything around me exploded and I knew no more.