This is a pointless story about me and my friend Erika having a battle of the bands with Rex, Weevil, Joey, Seto, Mokuba, and my daddy Marik. It is quite funny, so enjoy!
Once there were peoples. There's names were Erika, Kriss, Seto, Mokuba, Joey, Marik, Rex, and Weevil (aka Buggy).They were walking when all of a sudden they came across a building. The building had a lovely sign. It read: "JAMAICA! "Kriss and Erika burst out saying,
"WELL THAT'S CONVENIENT!"
And Seto said, " How's that convenient?" And Erika said
"poor Seto. He's so unedjamacated."
So they all walked inside Jamaica.
Rex said, "What SI this place?"
"Si?" asked Kriss,
"I was feeling Mexican." Rex explained.
" Niiiiiice," said Erika.
"This is Jamaica," Mokuba explained. "It's a bowling ally, with food, bowling, and guys who think they are sexy but really aren't who are carrying eggs and hiding behind the bowling pins!" he said.
"How did you know that?" Seto asked.
"I read the pamphlet," he explained.
Marik said, "Why would THIS place have pamphlets?"
and Joey said, "BECAUSE IT'S JAMAICA, DUH!"
"That's right Daddy!" Erika said, patting him on the head.
"Good boy," Seto said, giving him a doggy treat that randomly appeared.
"I thought you were allergic?" Kriss said.
"Whatever," Seto replied.
"Now what do we do?" asked Buggy.
"Randomly run around like idiots?" Kriss and Erika suggested.
"NO!" came everyone else's reply.
":(" said the girls.
Then Rex looked around, "Where are our pets?"
Mokuba said, "you have pets?"
"Yeah, Rex has a cat and i have a wolf!" Kriss said,
"I thought Rex lied about the cat," Weevil said,
"No, he lied about lying about having a cat!" Kriss said proudly.
"That was confusing..." said everyone (except the smart people). "o.o unison!" said everyone (etsp) . "O.O THIS IS WEIRD!" said everyone (etsp). "STOP SAYING WHAT I SAY AT EXACTLY THE SAME TIME!" said everyone (etsp). "...HI!" said Erika and Kriss.
"This is stupid," said the smart people.
"Since when did Jamaica have a stage?" Erika pointed out.
"I don't know, let's have a singing contest!" Kriss said.
"NO!" Eveyone shouted.
Erika and Kriss grew a million times bigger and glared at everyone else. "YES!" they screamed.
"Meep!" everyone else meeped.
They all ran up on stage.
"Umm, can i just play the drums with Kriss instead?" Rex suggested.
"O.O!" said Erika.
"You're retarded," Rex smacked with forehead.
Then Erika growled at Rex. "SETO WILL SMITE YOU!"
"No I won't," he said.
"Wow, thanks for the help there... X.x" Erika said.
"You can play the drums," Mokuba said because he's a nice, peaceful little person.
"Cool!" Rex said.
Weevil then ruined it and asked, "Can i play with you guys too?"
"O.O.O.O.O.O!" Erika said, "NO!"
"WILL YOU STOP THAT! THE NICE DUDE IS TRYING TO ASK A QUESTION!" Kriss shouted.
"I didn't know that you can exploode..." Erika said.
Rex then answered Weevil's question in saying, "You can't play any instruments..."
Weevil then got mad and shouted, "Well you can't even play the drums!"
"Yes he can," Kriss said.
"SHUT THE HELL UP, YOUR ANNOYING ME!" Seto broke the fight. "meep!" Everyone meeped.
"So, now what?" asked Marik, who needed to talk since he hadn't in a while.
"I dunno," Erika said.
"Is this gonna turn into battle of the bands?" Joey asked.
"Sure why not?" Erika said.
"I CALL KRISS'S!" Weevil shouted.
"FINE we'll find SOME instrument for you..." Kriss said.
"I'M gonna play guitar," Marik announced.
"NO WAY! this is MY guitar!" Kriss put her arms around it defensively.
"That I gave to you!" Marik pointed out.
"Yeah but i'm better!" Kriss claimed, (which was probably actually true)
"If anyone needs a lead guitar i'll vouch!" Marik shouted.
After many minutes of confusion the bands now stand Erika, Joey, Mokuba, and Seto even though he didn't want to, and Kriss, Rex, Weevil and Marik, (WOW! IT'S EVEN ! i never knew that there were 8 peoples that we always use...)
"So who's in my band?" Erika asked. Joey, Mokuba, and a very reluctant Seto raised their hands.
"Okay, Mokie, can you play an instrument majigger?"
"No..." he said sadly.
"Okay, well what about you, Joey?"
"I'm a good singer!"
"There is NO WAY that mutt is going to be our singer!" Seto grr-ed.
"Well he can't play an instrument, so what else can he do?" Mokuba asked.
"He can bang on (GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THAT GUTTER!) a drum and pretend like he knows what he's doing," Erika suggested.
"Wow, that will sure make us win..." Seto said glumly.
"Well you're positive, Mr. Positive!" Erika yelled.
"Shut up, I don't even want to do this!" he retorted.
Mokuba stood quietly like the cute little him he is. The band fought amongst themselves some more. Let's see how the other was doing...
"So what instrument CAN i play?" Weevil asked.
"I dunno, do you even know anything about music?" Kriss asked.
"No."
"Didn't think so," Kriss siged.
"Who made you the leader?" Marik asked.
Kriss pointed at Rex and Weevil, "They did."
"We did?" Rex asked as he looked at Weevil who also shrugged.
"Nevermind..." Kriss then suddenly got an idea! "Weevil can play the keyboard!" Kriss looked very triumphent over the idea that she just got.
"How do you make music out of letters?" Weevil asked.
Kriss sweatdropped, "You've never heard of a keyboard have you?" She asked.
"No, not the kind that supossadly (I can't spell today) makes music" Weevil replied.
Kriss said, "Well then it's a good thing you can program music into it so you can just move your fingers and make it look like your playing!"
"And I'm guessing that you're going to download the keyboard music form your laptop right?" Rex felt smart.
"I didn't think of that but OKAY!" Kriss said.
"What song are we even doing?" Marik asked.
"One that does not require your lovely assistance so leave" Kriss shooed.
"You can go judge!" Weevil suggested, (WOW Weevil's smart!)
"Better than playing in your wacko band..." Marik said as he trudged off.
The large dust-cloud from the other end of the room cleared momentarily. Erika looked up. She counted the other band's members. She pointed at Kriss. "One..." She pointed at Weevil. "...Uhhhhhh..." "Two?" Mokuba suggested.
"Oh yeah! Two!" She pointed at Rex. "Uh... brown? No wait... 8... no..."
"THREE, IDIOT!" Seto was obviously losing his temper.
"Oh... I thought it was P!" Joey said.
Everyone else sweatdropped.
"This is so stupid. I quit,"
Seto said, stomping over to where Marik stood.
"WAIT! SETO! YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON WHO CAN PLAY GUITAR! AND WE NEED YOU TO SING!" Erika yelled.
"I only sing for people who are worthy," Seto replied.
"Well, at least we are even again..." Mokuba sighed.
"Why do you two always fight?" Rex asked.
"Uh, 'cause he hates me?" Kriss replied.
"Doesn't everybody hate you?" Weevil asked.
"That was mean and no, his yami doesn't!" Kriss said.
"So the evil one is good and the good one is evil?" Rex said confusedly.
"Pretty much..." Kriss said as she began putting the keyboard part in one folder to transfer to the real keyboard.
Erika sighed. "Guys, our band sucks..." she said.
"Well yeah," Seto called over from the judges table (that appeared). "But I suggest you get a smarter animal to play drums. Dogs aren't that good with music..." he smirked.
"Shut up, Kaiba!" Joey called.
"Why do you call him Kaiba?" asked Erika.
"I dunno... that's what Yugi calls him," Joey shrugged.
"If Yugi told you to jump off a bridge, would you?" asked Mokuba curiously. "Wouldn't surprise me," said Seto.
"I can sooo see Joey jumping off a bridge because Yugi told him to..." Erika laughed.
"Isn't that because it's happened before?" asked Mokuba.
"No, that was a boat, and Yugi actually told him NOT to jump..." Erika explained. "He was a bad dog that day..." Seto chimed in.
"Yeah, well... YOU'RE ALL KITTIES!" Joey said as he crossed his arms, feeling rather proud of himself.
"Was that an insult?" Mokuba asked.
"I like Kitties..." Erika said.
"They're cleaner than mutts," said Seto.
"JUST GET ON WITH THE STUPID BAND THING!" Marik yelled from the judges table.
"Oh yeah..." said the "band".
"Okay guys, we really need to get moving with this... Daddy, you are playing drums, yes?" Erika asked.
"Yep!" Joey exclaimed, poking the drum with his finger.
"I watch Seto play guitar sometimes..." Mokuba said quietly. "I might be able to do SOMETHING..."
"Okay, then I can play keyboard!" Erika smiled.
"WE'RE ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING!" The whole band was happy. "Who's the singer?" Mokuba asked. Oh how he shouldn't have.
"Me, of course, I'd make the best singer!" Joey announced.
"Daddy, I've never heard you sing, but I don't think it's a good idea..." Erika said. "Are you saying you're better than me!" Joey asked.
"I never said that!" Erika said.
"You implied it..." Mokuba said.
"What's implied mean?" Joey asked.
"I dunno..." Erika replied.
"Let's ask SmarterChild!" she suggested.
She pulled out Charlie and turned him on. (Charlie's her laptop) Nothing happened. "DAMMIT CHARLIE, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE RETARDED NOW!" Erika screamed at the mentally retarded laptop.
"BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS RETARDED, YOU KNOW THAT!" Charlie screamed.
"O.o Charlie talked?" asked Erika.
"No, that was me, I was bored," Joey said.
"Oh. Well, Charlie's working now, so I'll ask SmarterChild!" Erika said.
"What were we asking him again?" Joey asked.
"I dunno..." said Erika
A few minutes later
"What were we doing?" asked Joey.
"I dunno..." said Erika.
Mokuba just sighed.
"Hey now it is done loading!" Kriss exclaimed.
"That's a releif" Weevil exasperated.
"Sure is, now you have a purpose in our band!" Rex said.
"Who said it was your band?" Weevil asked.
"He did, duh!" Kriss said.
Then Koga appeared 'cause he's talented like that. "Watchya up to?" He asked. "Nothing, why?" Kriss said.
"Why do you have music equipment? You're not planning on playing without me are you?" He shouted/asked.
"Sorry Koga, new band, and NO you can't play, the teams are already even so poof, right now!" Kriss ordered.
"Couldn''t he sing?" Weevil suggested.
"Yeah, i can sing! DOMO ARIGATO MR. ROBOTO! DOMO FRICKEN ARIGATO MR. FRICKEN ROBATO!" (Koga gets mad at Mr. Roboto…) Koga shouted.
"NOOOOOO!" Kriss screamed. "You always sing too badly, get mad at the song and start swearing, and dammit Koga, learn a new song!" Kriss continued.
"If you wanted me to leave you could've just said so..." Koga pops.
Erika was looking over, "That was weird..." She muttered and went back to arguing with her 'band'.
Kriss slapped her forehead, (whatever that is), "dork..."
"you confuse me..." Rex said.
"If you want explainations you'll have to take a number!" Marik shouted.
He and Seto laughed.
Back at the other band, Mokuba was sitting boredly plucking random guitar strings, Joey was standing on his drum, seeing how much time it would take to brake it, and Erika was looking for Seto pictures on Charlie. This continued for a while, until... BOOM!
"O.O! What was that!" Mokuba and Erika asked in unison, looking over to Joey. He was standing in front of the drum... or what was left. Remarkably, and no one knows how, but the drum exploded. Then turned into a cabbage. Then exploded again. Then turned into a tap-dancing chicken. Then exploded once more.
"O.o... Well that was fun!" said Joey.
"I think we're going to win, the other band is doing absolutly nothing..." Rex pointed out.
"True, HOW LONG TILL WE START?" Kriss shouted to the two 'jugdes.' "WHENEVER!" Seto shouted back.
Weevil than got an idea, "Maybe i actually DO have enough time to learn the music!"
"Yeah, but you know absolutly nothing about the keyboard!" Kriss said.
"Yeah but you can teach me!" Weevil said.
"Just go back to faking it!" Rex snapped.
"So we're basically ready we're just waiting for those idiots over there to get ready?" Kriss asked.
"Yeah pretty much," Rex said.
"WAIT! I don't think you've heard this song before Rex!" Kriss said.
"Really?" Rex looked scared all of a sudden, "Are you sure?"
"No, listen to it, do you know it?" Kriss said as she put headphones over Rex's ears.
Erika, Joey, and Mokuba mindlessly watched the tap-dancing chicken, who re-formed after Joey kicked what was left of the exploded one. It tap-danced. They watched. All was magical. Except at the judges table.
"Alright, we're starting now, whether you all like it or not," Seto announced.
"But-" said both bands.
"WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!"
"Sheesh, no need to yell, we've been ready the whole time, silly willy walnut head Seto!" Erika said. "It's THEM we're waiting for!" she said, pointing to the other band. Everyone else just sighed.
"So who goes first?" Kriss said.
"uhhhhhhhhh YOU!" Both bands said at the same time. "NO YOU! I DON"T WANT TO GO KNOW WE"RE STILL NOT READY!" they said together again.
"I know! We can play rock, paper, uh... uh... what are the things call that cut paper?" Erika said.
"A paper shredder?" Kriss suggested.
"No siccors!" Mokuba said.
"YEAH! those, we can play that game!" Erika said. Both bands huddled together to decide on their object.
"ONE TWO THREE GO!" the bands said, ("cept Erika 'cuase she can't count...) Both the bands did rock. "GRRRRRRRRR!" they said.
"We'll have to try again," Joey said.
"ONE, TWO, THREE, GO!" the shouted again. Both did paper. "GRRRR!" "ONE, TWO THREE, GO!" Both did scissors. "RAWR!" They rawred.
"Okay, I know," Mokuba said. "We'll send one of our members over, and you send one of yours. They'll have a FIGHT TO THE DEATH!" Everyone stared at Mokuba. "Or not..."
"So what DO we do?" Weevil asked.
"We could always argue about it and the first to run out of breath wins!" Joey suggested.
"Or not!" Kriss said.
"Or too!" Joey said back.
"I'm NOT gonna argue with you!" Kriss said.
"Yes you will!" Joey taunted.
Kriss just glared at him but didn't say a word.
"Dammit, you didn't..." Joey said.
"Well I, for one, like Mokuba's fight to the death idea," Seto smirked.
"NO!" said everyone.
Seto was neglected.
"So what do we do?" Erika asked. "And WHY AREN'T YOU TALKING, MARIK!"
Marik shrugged.
"This is annoying me, and my patience for being a "judge" is wearing thin. Erika's team goes first," Seto announced.
"Aww, why me!" she asked.
"BECAUSE I HATE YOU!" was his lovely reply.
"Fine... looks like we're going first..." Mokuba said glumly.
Erika and band went up on stage. "Ready?" she asked.
"Yep!" Joey said. Mokuba nodded. "OKAY AUDIENCE!" Erika yelled loudly. "ARE YOU READY FOR THE ROCKINGEST PERFORMANCE YOU'VE EVER SEEN!" -cricket cricket- "OKAY! LET'S GO!"
Joey hit his drumstick on his head, having no drum left (and it really made quite a lovely sound, seeings how the hollow space in his head made it echo nice and loud) and Mokuba plucked a string.
"Here goes..." Erika said. "One... two..." "
Oh God..." Seto cringed, fearing what was coming.
The band sang. "TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR, HOW I WONDER WHAT YOU ARE! UP ABOVE THE WORLD SO HIGH! LIKE A DIAMOND IN THE SKY! TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR! HOW I WONDER WHAT YOU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Kriss's band looked at each other and started laughing their asses off!
"Great joke Erika, but what's your real song!" Kriss said.
"GRRR!" Erika growled.
"No, really, i'm serious, that was your warm up right?" Kriss said.
"No..."
"That was our song..." Mokuba said softly, as if he were hurt by the comment. "Yeah! You got a problem with it?" Joey asked the others.
"We're so neglected..." Erika sighed. "You're turn... "
Kriss walked to the center of the stage with her guitar ready to go. The rest of her band followed. Kriss did some cool little noises with it and Rex started drumming, and the thing was... IT WAS AN ACTUAL REAL SONG THAT ACTUALLY SOUNDED COOL!
"Yeah, here I've been sitting on this bar stool," Kriss started.
"You can't drink..." Marik commented.
"talking like a damn fool,"
"Stop swearing,"
"Got the 12 o'clock news blues!"
"You can rhyme?"
"And I've given up hope on the afternoon soaps and a bottle of cold brew!" "YOU CAN'T DRINK!"
Kriss nodded to her band to keep continueing playing in case she did something dumb like attack her dad.
"Is it any wonder i'm not crazy?"
"You ARE crazy!"
"Is it any wonder i'm sane at all?"
"Yes" (I have a bad feeling about this...)
"Well i'm so tired of losing, I've got nothing to do with all day to dooo it!" "You're an idiot"
"Well, I'll go out cruising but i've no place to go with all night to get there!"
"You can't drive... crud"
"Is it any wonder i'm not a ciminal?"
"You ARE a criminal!"
"Is it any wonder I'm not in jail?"
"You've BEEN to jail!"
"Is it any wonder i've got too much, time on my hands? It's ticking away with my sanity I've got too much time on my hands It's hard to believe such a calamity I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away, ticking away from me" Kriss plays a wickedly awsome guitar solo and everyone is just sitty there with their mouthes wide open and Marik is speechless."Now I'm a jet fuel genius"
"wouldn't go THAT far!" "I can solve the world's problems without even trying!" "You "CAUSE world problems"
"I've got dozens of friends, and the fun never ends"
"you only have 3 friends!"
"That is as long as I'm buying!"
"you have no money!"
"Is it any wonder I'm not the President?"
"Who would vote for you!" (that was Seto that time)
"Is it any wonder I'm null and void?"
"Stop using big words, you'll choke on one!"
"Is it any wonder I've got too much time on my hands? and those were actually small... It's ticking away with my sanity"
"You have none left!"
"I've got too much time on my hands It's hard to believe such a calamity I've got too much time on my hands and it's ticking away, ticking away from me"
Over in the corner, Erika's band sat silently. Then they burst out laughing.
"YOU CALL THAT A SONG!" Joey called out through giggles.
"TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR... NOW THAT'S A SONG!" "SHUT UP EVERYONE! WE'RE VOTING!" Called the judges.
A few minutes passed, and the judges were finally ready.
"Okay, we know who won," Marik said.
Everyone waited with anticipation.
"The winner is..."
"No one!" Seto announced. "You all sucked! Except Mokuba. He owned. EVERYONE ELSE SUCKED!"
"HEY!" both bands shouted in unison! Mokuba excluded. He just sat there happy.
"YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO ADMIT THAT I'M BETTER AT THE GUITAR THEN YOU!" Kriss shouted at Marik.
"WELL WE ALL KNOW I'M THE BEST GUITARIST ANYWAY, SO SHUT UP!" Seto retorted.
"WE"VE NEVER EVEN HEARD YOU PLAY!" Kriss shouted.
"WHO CARES!" he shouted back.
"I DO!"
"Cierre para arriba!" Marik shouted.
"NO!" Said Kriss.
Then Marik and Kriss start arguing in spanish, the main cognate that people pick up is guitar.
Everyone else just kinda stared at the feuding faja and daughja.
"So... who wants pizza?" Joey asked.
"I'm in," said everyone else.
They walked off, leaving the two to fight with themselves. THE END!That story was hot, wasn't it? XDDD