Author's Note: So this is my first Saiyuki fic and I hope you enjoy it. It takes place pre-series, a month after Sanzo brings Goku to Chang-an. Just a pointless bit of fluff, Sanzo style. ^_^

Disclaimer: Dude, if I owned Saiyuki, would I be writing fanfic?

Waking and Dreaming

Sanzo jerked up in his bed, his breath coming in harsh gasps that burned his throat. He could feel the cold sweat dripping down his back and sides adhering his sleeping robe to his skin. He knew it was a nightmare that had roused him and was grateful that he could not recall what it had been about. All he remembered was the sick terror and despair that came from helplessness. He felt along the floor next to his futon, fingers fumbling in the darkness for his cigarettes. Finding them, he placed one between his lips and lit it with a match from the book he'd taken to keeping next to his bed. He took a long drag and watched the plume of grey smoke, luminescent silver in the moonlight from the open window, fade as it rose to the ceiling. He could feel the last dregs of his terror fading with each exhalation of the evanescent clouds.

The fear itself was fleeting, but he wondered if he dared to fall asleep again. His nightmares were not the kind that quietly faded after waking. They tended to wait in the recesses of sleep until he drifted off again. This time around he may not be so lucky as to forget what they were about.

It was just then that he noticed the lump under the covers at his side. Startled, he looked down to see the tuft of brown hair and the gold diadem sticking out from beneath his blanket. He scowled down at his unexpected guest and took another drag from his cigarette. It had been only a month since he'd brought the stupid monkey back to Chang-an and the little beast was still driving him insane.

Sanzo sighed and turned his gaze to the open window and the half moon hanging in the starry sky. He had thought that once he got that stupid voice in his head to shut up he would have some peace, but no, the moron insisted on following him back to the temple and had been nothing but trouble ever since. Though he had to admit that there had been nothing more severe than a broken urn since the first incident with the Seiten Taisei. (And he also had to admit that it was amusing to see the stiff and proper monks thrown into apoplectic fits of indignant rage at the monkey's antics.)

The sleeping Goku made a soft whimper in his sleep, drawing Sanzo's sharp gaze back to his ward. The monkey shifted and turned toward Sanzo. He wiggled over until his head was resting in the young monk's lap with one arm curled up to his chest and the other thrown around Sanzo's waist.

"What the-? You little shit, if you don't get off this instant I'm going to murder you!" Sanzo hissed. Goku's only response was to snuggle closer, making a happy sigh as he did so. Sanzo growled and wondered where he had put that blasted fan so he could beat some sense into the stupid monkey. He tried to shove the smaller boy away but it only served to make him tighten his grip.

Sanzo grumbled and cursed as he resigned himself to his fate. Not only would he get no more sleep that night, it seemed he would also be serving as a pillow to the stupid monkey. He shifted his own pillow and leaned back against the wall, stabbing out his cigarette in the ashtray at his bedside.

He'd closed his tired eyes for only a moment when the next thing he knew the bells of the temple were chiming to call the monks to their duties. The dawn light shone through his window, illuminating his sparse quarters. He straightened and bit back a curse at the crick in his neck. His leg was numb and Goku was still curled up in the same position from the night before, his chubby face slack in a sound sleep. Sanzo had to remind himself not to smile at the sight. There was nothing cute about his charge, nothing at all. Especially not when he was curled up like a kitten with a look of innocent, oblivious, contentment on his face.

"Priest Sanzo?" there was a soft knock on the door followed by the screen sliding open. One of the monks, Sanzo couldn't be bothered to remember his name at the moment, peered inside. "We are waiting for you to lead morning rites, Priest Sanzo," he said, bowing.

"Someone else can do it," Sanzo replied, turning his gaze back to the sleeping child in his lap.

"But Priest Sanzo--," the other monk started.

Sanzo shot the man a heavy glare that he reserved for perverts and people who interrupted his paper work. The monk fell silent, bowed, slid the screen shut, and fled.

Sanzo settled back against his pillow and lit up another cigarette. With his free hand he brushed a tuft of wild hair from Goku's face.

His refusal to do morning prayers had nothing at all to do with the boy asleep at his side. He just didn't want to get up. That was all there was to it. It had nothing to do with the warmth he felt in his chest or the comfort he took from having a warm body pressed close to him. And it most definitely had absolutely nothing to do with the sleepy, contented smile he received later that morning.