It had been a relatively normal day by all standards for a certain tenth generation Vongola boss as he went through more paper work than anyone should ever have to deal with. He'd rather do this though, than do some of more ahem "traditional" mafia jobs. Unfortunately due to recent circumstances of having his life threatened for the hundredth time he had to put up with one of his guardians watching him do this menial task. This wouldn't have been such a problem if it were someone he got along better with like Storm, Rain, or even Lightning or Sun. Mist however was not someone he enjoyed being alone with.
Especially with that goddamned stare! Sure it was boring, who wouldn't be bored to death watching someone review papers and sign others? Apparently Mukuro Rokudo found enough entertainment in just staring though with his odd eyes. He probably knew how uncomfortable it made Tsuna, and that's why he did it; that's also why Tsuna avoided having his Mist or Cloud guardians if he could help it.
Frustrated with the tense atmosphere the Decimo tried a tactic that worked well with his Rain guardian and best friend Yamamoto Takeshi-talking. "So, umm Mukuro...where's Chrome today?...Isn't it bothersome to use your powers just to watch me do paper work?"
The demon just quirked an eyebrow at him, and if Tsunayoshi thought his smirk was large before with his mocking stare, it was even larger now that the two were going to engage in conversation. "Are you trying to get rid of me Tsunayoshi? I don't think the others would be too thrilled to find out that I left you alone. Then think of what they would do to poor Chrome." Everything in his voice screamed that Mukuro knew he had the advantage in this situation.
Tsunayoshi hated that tone. For the sake of some normalcy he continued in a pleasant enough way as if he wasn't being mocked for everything. "No, no. Not at all. Just wondering why you'd be here when Chrome-san is just as capable." A hungry look filled his guardian's eyes and the mafia boss just knew he was in trouble.
Mukuro stood from his chair and walked over to lean on Tsunayoshi's desk. Leaning even further down he whispered into the Vongola's ear, "Maybe because I enjoy being around you. Or maybe it's so I'll have a better chance of possessing you. Which could it be Tsunayoshi?"
That's about the time that Tsuna pushed himself away from the predator, glad for the thousandth time that he sat on a wheelie chair that gave him greater distance when he pushed himself away from those that insisted on coming onto him. Trying to think of anything to get him out of this Tsuna looked around the room with a topic to bring up. When he noticed Mukuro coming close again Tsuna spotted the perfect distraction in his guardian's eyes.
"How do you escape from Hell?"
The question certainly threw Mukuro off. But he was quickly back to his normal face with his not so normal laugh. "That's certainly something someone like you shouldn't have to worry about," he said flopping back onto the desktop before continuing. "It's easy more or less once you get past the first Hell."
"And how do you do that?" Even though this topic was only raised to keep a certain horny pineapple out of his pants, Tsuna had to admit that he was intrigued with the idea of going to Hell and coming back. How one could accomplish this once was a mystery to him. How Mukuro had done it six times was like Tsuna understanding (or obeying) physics.
"You beat the Devil at his little game, whatever that may be. Don't worry though, someone like you probably won't see anything as terrifying as that place. Now then, where were we?"
As Tsuna woke up and looked around his surroundings, he realized why that memory would come to him in the form of a dream. That meeting had been years ago, and the mafia boss could admit to himself with pride that he had gotten slightly better at handling his needy guardians, and everything that had been thrown at him. It took him ten or so years, but better late than never right? Everything around him appeared just as one would expect it to. Fire, brimstone, darkness, and shadows with only flame for light. Hell was just as stereotypical as everyone made it out to be. Tsuna grabbed his head to try and recall what happened when it became plainly obvious that he had died. Oh yes, he had been shot in order to prevent his family from suffering. He was able to smile at this and hoped that no one in the world of the living was referring to him as "No-good-Tsuna" for a move he thought was pretty noble.
Sitting up, the brunet found he was in a bed with rows more of what appeared to be sleeping people, while others were empty. So he got up and rolled off the bed noticing a note on the bedside table. Its instructions were pretty clear. Get out of the room and prepare to meet the Devil to decide where you're going. Looking down at his appearance, Tsuna decided that the suit he was shot in would have to do despite the blood stain and bullet hole. Afterall, what else was he going to wear? So he headed to the only door in the long room and despite the screams to be heard on the other side went through.
The other side was complete madness. Rape over here, rabid animals over there, booms and crashes from various forms of war machines everywhere. Tsunayoshi Sawada just ignored it and went to his given task with a straight face even when some of the terrors around him came dangerously close. One person had even tried sticking a hand down his pants from behind. Just like all the others who had tried before, this person quickly met an unhappy elbow. You think somebody would learn, if not from their own mistakes, then from someone else's. Nope. Even though he had been given no instructions, his feet led him to a grand set of doors that could easily compete with those from Vongola manors. Just as he was about to knock they opened to let him in and reveal a terrifying, sickening creature on a great throne of bones.
Another disgusting vermin crawled out from a hole in a distorted fashion and announced his presence to what be the Devil. "Tsunayoshi Sawada; Vongola Decimo. Killed in gunfire in a mafia battle against a rival mafia family." There wasn't much to it, for which Tsuna was thankful. He'd often found himself sitting while waiting for the announcer to finish introducing him to a party full of people who all knew him. He was Vongola afterall. It didn't matter how low your position in that family, if you were part of the famiglia, everyone knew you. If you were the boss everyone knew you.
The creature on the rotting throne sneered down on him. It had certainly been a while since he'd had this feeling of being looked down on, what was it? This morning? Ah, that's right, Hibari thought it would be a wonderful wake up call to be raped right before negotiations. That man couldn't smile properly to save his life, so it was a good thing he could fight to save his life instead. Anything he attempted came as a smirk or a sneer. Needless to say, he was used to the feeling of being looked down on despite his position in the mafia world. After a disturbing silence Tsuna decided to hurry things along and start the conversation himself. "So I hear things here are decided with games."
It was only through Hyper Intuition that he was able to tell that he'd shocked the Devil with his knowledge. Everything else about him said otherwise. "That's usually right, but I've grown bored recently of games. So what do you think I should do about this Vongola?"
Now how was Tsuna supposed to answer that?! The Devil just conveniently chooses his death to give up on games? He expects the mighty tenth Vongola to choose his new torture hobby? This is almost as painful as putting up with his close famiglia on a daily basis. Almost. Unfortunately the disfigured demon crawling on the floor came up with a suggestion before Tsuna could. "Why don't you put him through all the Hells for all his sins? He can stay where he gets stuck."
When they both turned with disturbing grins in his direction Tsuna used some of the colourful language he'd picked up from Italy, "Oh fuck."
Within a day he had returned to the throne room a little worse for wear, but still in decent shape. At this point everyone in Hell had been informed that the little Vongola had been turned into the Devil's new play thing for a brand new game. That meant that he had been intercepted on every level more than the normal occupant would be, and by the time he returned to the main level to shuffle into the lair everyone around was frightened by what kind of power this guy must have to make it through. The tired man could only flop down on the ground after he shut the door, not wanting to put up with anything anymore. This was almost as bad as his birthday when everyone suddenly got the same idea of what to give him for his birthday, except of course the girls who hadn't helped in the situation at all. But that was another story.
He must be honoured, because there the disgusting creature that ruled this place was, infront of him squatting at eye level boaring his eyes into Tsuna's very soul to try and understand how anyone could survive one Hell, let alone all of them.
It was just as Mukuro had told him. Once you get through one the rest are easy.
Now that the Devil was the inferior one, it was his turn to start the conversation. He only had one reason to talk to this amazing creature, and he let his intentions known by simply asking "How?"
Tsuna could only laugh. He usually did this after a particularly hard day, and today was somewhere in his top ten most difficult days. His birthday was probably above it, yeah, his birthday definitely came higher on Fuuta's rankings of most difficult days in Tsunayoshi Sawada's life. Looking into angry eyes Tsuna let his chuckles die and answered with a grin, "I go through worse almost everyday. If not worse then atleast the same level of torture. That and I had a bit of a hint on what I was going to be facing. Does the name Mukuro Rokudo sound familiar?"
"Ah, so you were only able to succeed because you had knowledge of what was to come. In that case, I should just prepare some new forms of torture the likes of which that recurring bastard has never seen. How about-"
He was quickly cut off by a pissed off yet cocky Tsunayoshi, "What? Rape? Baby sitting? Poison or acid? Mockery and humiliation? Getting shot? Hate to tell you, but I go through that everyday. The worst you could probably throw at me would be the emo Hell with all the cute fluffy things, and that would just be culture shock for a while. Like I said, I go through worse almost everyday. How about we go through some of the levels you already have set in place huh?" The tenth Vongola was not in a pleasant mood anymore, and he was going to take his frustration out by ranting the Hell out of the Devil himself about the Hell his life had been for the longest time.
"The level of animals? Ha! Try putting up with a temperamental cow for ten years! Oh and animals of all other sorts! A lion for one! The first one I had to put up with was bad enough. Being sent to the zoo thinking you're on a date with the cutest girl only to find out that you're actually looking for an animal familiar. And of course you just have to be thrown into every cage in order to find out what's most suitable for your personality! No one could possibly throw you in a cage with cute animals could they?! No! You're theto be leader of the Vongola so your animal symbol must be strong like you're not. They all say this despite the fact that everyone else has a relatively tame animal like a turtle or a bird! Nope I needed a fucking lion that wanted to eat me! Heaven knows that house isn't full of animals already, and the way people run in and out all the time, eating food, making a mess, and trying to kill me. Not animalistic at all. Oh and of course there's Ken! Mukuro's pet? Yeah it's a human who can change his features to those of animal's with fake teeth! He takes great joy in pretending to be a dog or something else that can chase me down the street, the hall, around the office! You name it; chances are I've run in, down or up it! That was a piece of cake!" Tsunayoshi was panting at this point, and that was just with his explanation of the level of animals. He still had five levels to explain, and he probably wouldn't stop there by the looks of things.
"Asura and Human were a complete joke! Strong opponents?! They were so weak! Do you know who has been on my case for ten years? Reborn! That tiny annoying baby that is the world's strongest hitman! Want to know a great way to wake someone up in the morning? Kicking them works really well according to Reborn! So does blowing them up, shooting them, hitting them with a 1 ton mallet! Hell that works for everything! And that's only the tip of the iceberg! I've been attacked by anyone, everyone, and anything since this whole mafia disaster started! Most of my guardians were first introduced to me by them trying to kill me! Getting blown through the sky with dynamite! Grenades and bazookas all the friggin' time! Give one of them a baseball and you're as good as dead if he throws the ball in your direction! Boxing of course is a sport dedicated to fighting! Of course this has to be done in the most EXTREME manner possible right?! Being bitten isn't much fun I'll have you know! It's a miracle I didn't land here soon with the amount of times I've heard the phrase "Bite you to death"! He was once the most feared teenager in Namimori, I'll have you know he's now feared world wide! Guess who gets to fight him whenever he's bored, challenged or horny! ME! Same with the bastard with the pineapple haircut! Mostly when he's horny though. They're all strong beyond comparison, so when I have to fight them, I'm limping at the end of the day! Those are my friends. How much fun do you think it is to put up with enemies of similar strength?! I think the strongest thing I came up against in there was the rabid cat that followed me from the animal level and decided my face would be most effective as a scratching post! You know who else does that?! Uri! My right hand man's vicious box weapon and precious pet! So if you think those battles were tough, you obviously don't know anything about mafia or frequent rape victims! Were you aware strength is handy when you want to rape someone? It's even more helpful when you're the rape victim who wants no part of it! Lots of training right there, not to mention all of the official training, and normal fights." Three Hells down, three to go. Quick to shoot down? You bet. "As for the last three Hells, once you've seen one terrifying illusion you've seen them all, and when you've avoided being possessed as long as I have you don't have much to worry about amateurs. If I had been caught down there I have a feeling Mukuro would have come down here and throttled the guy, then taken my body...I really don't want to know what he plans on using my body for whenever he tells me he's going to possess me one day." There was a definite shudder as it was obvious the tenth was imagining all kinds of horrible things.
The Devil's face was laughable as Tsuna continued to shatter all his hard work by going on about the Varia, Hibari's disciplinary committee, I-pin, the part of the family his dad was in charge of, Millifiore, Byakuran, his mom during her time of the month combined with a failed test score. This man just kept on going about his life and all he'd been put through. It was absolutely miserable.
"Hey wanna know what's even better than all of the comparisons to your Hell? My misery! It was mostly okay being known as 'No-Good-Tsuna' by all my class mates, because at the time I really was. I much prefer that one to the new one I was given over the years in my family. Try taking the 'no' in my nickname out and putting 'in-bed' in between 'good' and 'Tsuna' or other things like that. Anything to do with bed, or innuendos to do with sex have all been applied at some point. Oh, and the sheer amount of annoyances could kill me. Lambo was the biggest one until about...two days ago actually, but there's also Longchamp and his cronies. Until I became the official tenth everyone annoying me to become the tenth was pretty bad. Oh, and next time you see Mukuro keep him here! Popping up whenever he pleases, trying to take over the world through me, the amount of finances that guy uses in hair supplies despite him being an illusion, and the fact that Chrome can do just about anything with her hair being a girl and all! Absolutely aggravating! No one really wants him up there except Chrome, and she can create her own organs now, so take him! And if you see Reborn, keep him too! I see no reason to get hit all the time by a ten year old. Everything he does is aggravating, especially his 'good intentions'. So in the likely situation you see him for all his killing, tormenting, womanizing, etcetera, don't give him back.
"Humiliation's pretty painful too. Remember when I told you about the girl that I really liked? She thinks I'm gay! Hell! She supports me! I am not gay despite what she, and all my guardians may believe! Although due to circumstances I now have to atleast admit to being bisexual. Raising little kids? Guess what that involves? Potty training! I won't tell you how many shirts I've burned because of the cow! Too many to count! Oh and Bianchi! She doesn't like how much time of Reborn's I take up, and so despite being my subordinate she takes it upon herself to feed me. If you think the reason she's called 'Poison Scorpion' has anything to do with poison and some form of sharp object you're dead wrong! No, it's because she can't cook to a point where her food looks and tastes revolting! She knows that when she creates killer food, her enemy doesn't stand a chance. What she doesn't realize is that everything she cooks in killer food!
This was the point where the Devil put his hand on Tsuna's mouth to stop the rant from continuing any longer. His mind had more than enough new ideas on how to improve his disastrous paradise. An even better idea arose to him on how to complete this Vongola's Hell. "Good job child. You get to be sent home. From the sounds of it, it's a lot worse than anything I have here yet. Enjoy life again if it's possible in your situation. And tell Mukuro, Wilfred never wants to see him again after what he did to him." With the last sentence he pointed at the creature that acted as the Devil's assistant and Tsuna was lit in flames to take him home, albeit painfully-wait, no it's not that bad after playing dodge bomb way too many times.
Tsuna woke up to the sound of beeping and panicking voices now turning hectic when they saw him move. Despite protests the Vongola boss sat up and held his right eye which burned now. Was that where he had been shot? If that was the case, it was going to be interesting to explain how he was alive after having his brains blown out. Just then his left eye shot open in realization. He stuck his free hand out and swiftly demanded a mirror. The people around him, while concerned for his health didn't dare to oppose the will of the tenth.
While he waited the doctors did multiple tests to find that he was perfectly fine, much different from the case two minutes ago. Once he finally received the okay from the doctor who asked if he needed anything for his eye, to which the answer was no, his guardians all in various levels of shock, mourning, and happiness scrambled in. Chrome handed him the hand mirror he had requested and it was only then that he opened his right eye to find what he had been dreading.
"Kufufufu, it would seem that we match now Tsunayoshi." Replacing the shy Chrome was a Devil more evil than the one he had just encountered who placed a hand on the boss's shoulder looking into the reflection. Where he once had two brown eyes, there was now one normal brown eye and a red eye with the symbol for the six levels of Hell. Somehow Tsuna had a feeling that the deal attached to his eye was that if he managed to survive his own personal Hell, he would get a seven instead.
There was an uproar as people began to argue about finding out what the bastard had done to the tenth, and how would Tsuna's new eye effect their situation. He just closed his eyes and remembered his parting words with the Devil.
"Fuck you."
"By the sounds of it, everyone above here will be doing that to you anyway."
He just knew that it would be better to keep his mouth and eyes shut for now. Maybe he could get some sleep now since he knew none of his guardians would attack him while the others are in the room. None of them were too fond of orgies.
Part of me is almost tempted to continue this for the sake of NaNoWrMo...but what could I do really? I don't write M stuff. Although I certainly read too much of it to be good for anyone's health. So no going too in detail over the rapes Tsuna faces on a daily basis. This was originally supposed to have a lot more swearing, but as I tried to create Tsuna's TYL character I realized that he probably wouldn't swear too much despite going to Italy, and just the fact that he's in the Mafia. Sorry if anyone's offended about my references to swearing Italians, I've just been told by my very Italian buddy that the Italian do actually swear quite a bit, and given that the characters in the show who swear the most are the Italians, for a fanfiction we can make this work. Anyway I'm tired so I'm going to leave. Yay to my first KHR fanfiction. Someone tell me all the things I did wrong while I write another story, till then
~Tangerine