It's Not Over
By Ginamr
Summary: He'd hurt her and nearly destroyed her. But Edward's crucial mistake was thinking that Bella wouldn't fight back. Bella was a lot tougher than she looked and she was damned if she was going to believe for one minute that the last several months of her life had been a lie.
Soundtrack for this chapter: Broken by Lifehouse, It's Not Over by Chris Daughtry
This chapter is from Bella's POV.
One
I had thought my life would never be normal again—until just before Thanksgiving when Charlie had declared at the dinner table one evening, "That's it, Bella! I'm sending you home to Renée."
Charlie's announcement caught me by surprise. "Why? What did I do?" I blurted.
He scowled. "You didn't do anything," he explained. "That's the problem. You never do anything."
I sighed. He was right. Ever since— I couldn't finish the thought. "I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize, Bells," he murmured. "Believe it or not, I get what you're going through. I felt the same way when your mom left and took you with her. It was hard, but I dealt with it. You refuse to acknowledge that anything happened and that won't help your heart heal. You can miss him, honey, just don't let it destroy you. If anything, you'll be stronger for it."
Surprisingly, Charlie's words got me thinking. How could I doubt how much Edward loved me? The song that he'd written for me...It had been so easy to believe when he'd said he didn't want me anymore. Why? My gaze locked with Charlie's and suddenly it made sense. I had been so afraid that what had happened to my parents would happen to Edward and I that I hadn't let myself believe that he loved me. He couldn't because I was broken...damaged in some way.
Charlie seemed to have guessed the direction of my thoughts. "I hope you know it wasn't your fault, Bells," he said softly. "Sometimes love just isn't enough to keep two people together. Your mama was right about one thing, though—you're meant for something more than this small little town can offer." He paused. "I know I wasn't around a lot when you were younger...not as much as I should have been. If I'd had any sense, I would have followed Renee to Phoenix and worked it out so that I had you half-time."
I shook my head. "Everything worked out."
"Still," he continued. "Maybe if I'd played a more active role in your life, things would have been easier and you'd have found yourself a nice young man by now."
It always came back to Edward. I wished I could explain everything to Charlie...what Edward was, what had almost happened in Phoenix and why Edward had left me. Over the last several months, Charlie and I had grown closer than I'd ever imagined. He wasn't just Charlie to me anymore. He was my dad.
"I know you may not think so," I began. "But Edward is nice. He's had a rough life. He's so afraid of hurting me—"
Charlie's lips tightened. "You were downright catatonic after he left, Bells. I ought to go after him with my shotgun and teach him a thing or two about hurting my little girl."
The image of Charlie's face when the bullets didn't leave a scratch made me laugh. Despite the ineffectiveness of his plan against an invincible vampire, I understood and appreciated the sentiment.
I looked back at Charlie to see his lips stretched in a genuine smile. "It's good to hear you laugh, kiddo. The first step on the road to recovery...the first of many. You're going to be okay, Bells."
"Yeah," I said with a smile.
/\
I spent the remainder of the evening in my room, content in knowledge that Edward still loved me while at the same time furious at him for lying to me. I was tired of him trying to protect me from himself. I wasn't a porcelain doll. I could take care of myself. I had to find him. No matter what it took, I had to find him. But I had no idea where to even start. The tip about Carlisle getting a job at a hospital in L.A. was a false trail. It was way too sunny for them. More than likely, they'd be heading north.
It was a one in a million shot, but I slid into my computer chair and did a search via Google for Doctor Carlise Cullen. I didn't really expect it to be that easy. If it was, then Edward would have known I'd find them and wouldn't have tried this little stunt. To my surprise, the first search result mentioned a Doctor Carlise Cullen and his adopted children. I clicked on the link and when the website opened, I found myself staring at the familiar face of the man who had become like a second father to me.
I moved past the picture and read the article. It made mention of Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rose, Jasper and Alice...but no Edward. Confused, I continued reading. Not one mention of him. But I'd bet my truck that his family at least had an idea of where to find him. I wrote the name of the town on a scratch pad and looked it up on Google Maps. It was some town in Canada —Lake Cowichan. It was very rainy most of the year and very cold, making it the perfect place for the Cullen family. I jumped from my seat and rummaged under the bed for the old road atlas from my mom and I's trips, finding Canada with ease. Lucky for me, Renee had hopes of world travel.
I smiled as I came across the little black book that contained my passport. I opened it and checked the date. It didn't expire for another five months. That gave me plenty of time to find Edward and get back to Forks. Charlie. The thought was so sudden that all of my happiness at finding my second family evaporated. I couldn't leave for five months without some kind of explanation.
The familiar jingle of my cell phone caught my attention and I answered instinctively. "Hello?"
"Hey Bells, do you want to go out tonight?" I sighed in disappointment. It was only Jacob. "It really isn't healthy for you to stay locked in your room, you know. Charlie said that you were feeling better, so..."
I was struck with sudden inspiration—Jake could go with me. Charlie, the hypocrite, wouldn't think anything of us spending nights together without supervision. I hated lying to Jake, but for now it was best that he didn't know the details. I'd tell him once we'd left the Port Angeles city limits.
"Yeah," I replied, trying to sound casual. "About that...I thought it might do me a bit of good to get away from Forks for a little while...away from the reminders, you know?"
I could hear the disappointment in his voice as he continued, "Oh. Okay then."
I paused to gather up the nerve. "I thought it would be fun if you went with me…like a sort of road trip. Charlie wouldn't ever let me go by myself. Do you have your passport?"
The disappointment quickly became suspicion. "Yeah, why? Where are we going?"
"Canada is nice this time of year," I said casually. Nice and cold. I wouldn't doubt Cowichan Lake was completely frozen over.
"Canada?" he choked. "Have you lost it? It's freezing! Why do you think they hold the Winter Olympics in Vancouver? Besides that, Charlie will freak." He paused. "This isn't about the Cullens, is it?"
"Of course not," I lied, flinching at how easy the half-truth came. "Carlisle took a job in L.A., remember?"
His suspicions seemingly settled for the moment, he sighed. "All right. But how do you plan to convince Charlie to let you take time off school…not that I agree with this crazy plan of yours."
I froze. I hadn't considered that. The last thing I needed was a repeat of Charlie's postal freak out when he found out I was in the hospital and I dreaded the thought of a second storm out, fake or not. But I needed to do this.
"Maybe I'll just leave him a note that we're eloping."
"W-what?" came Jake's stuttered response.
I laughed, but had the oddest feeling that Jake was taking my flippant suggestion to heart. "Hey, it's not like we really can, you know. We're only, what, 17?"
"I'm 15," Jake corrected.
A grin turned up the corners of my lips. "So, in a year you'll be jailbait anyway. We just need to make a show of it. It takes parent permission for you to marry me and even then, you can't marry anybody until you're 16. But Charlie doesn't need to know that we know that."
"This is crazy," Jake murmured. "I must be out of my mind…but okay. If you're sure, I'll help you. I just hope none of the towns nearby will give a box of bullets to a father on a homicidal rampage."
I felt guilty leading him into trouble like this. He was risking his father's wrath and Charlie's just so I could see Edward again. For a moment, I paused…until the image of Edward's handsome face assaulted my mind's eye.
"As much as Charlie's going to flip, this is for the best," I assured him.