Hi, this is an idea me and RubyxKurosaki had when I was in France as we both love panto and wanted to do another BIG fic. This will have multiple authors probably since we will be writing some characters for the first time, but I hope you enjoy!
It wasn't unusual for the school of St Hetalia to experience such everyday things such as assemblies however the response from the students was also a typical reaction, there was a low murmur of shuffling as patience wore thinner and thinner with the attention spans of the average teenage boy. No-one was really listening to the blonde haired vice headmaster as he spoke about recent misbehaviour from around the school, many of which were down the acting of three particular students. The German vice headmaster was droning on to such an extent that even the headmaster felt the sting of boredom in his head, almost nodding off against his own arm once again as the other droned on about something pointless. This wasn't what he'd intended this assembly to be for. He'd had an actual reason for it. Sighing, he leant back and set his mind back to the whole reason for this situation…
~~Flashback~~
It was a peaceful sunny day and the only two in the headmaster's office were in deep conversation until the vice head's eyes widened and he had to bit hard to stop his mouth from hanging open.
The German couldn't believe what he was hearing; scowling at his boss he folded his arms, leaning against the doorframe "Romulus." He reprimanded, fixing the other with a frown "You can't be serious."
"Ve, Of course I am! Besides, the Council have all agreed on this! Our school need to do something for the children! And we're going to let our pupils decide what they'd like to do for it!" The Italian headmasters smile was almost wide enough to outshine the sun, bounding to his feet he started to pace the office, avoiding his German secretaries' glare. His office was organized, not due to his own cleaning skill but because of the German's, if it was up to the Italian the entire place would be a mess: "I think this calls for an assembly!"
~~Flashback~~
Suddenly aware he was in the assembly hall and not in the memory he was dreaming of, he noticed the same German he'd been dreaming about turned around to face him, glaring at him in the exact same fashion. The Italian jumped to his feet, crossing over to the podium as the boys all looked up. Usually he was at least a little more interesting or at least fell off the stage which was always a good laugh.
Arthur, who had straightened slightly to hear the headmaster, felt a sneaking hand suddenly reach from behind and grab his ass. He squeaked a little, and blushing from embarrassment, turned to glare at the three sat behind him. The three in question were used to Arthur looking at them like he was going to kill them with the power of his glare, the Prussian grinning back in return as the Frenchman whipped his hands on his legs and the Spaniard went back to gazing at the older of the headmasters sons, all three sniggering and pretending, or at least trying to have no idea to the British student's reaction.
"Oui? You need something?" questioned the French boy, also known as Francis Bonnefoy.
"Keep your hands to yourself, you perverted frog!" Arthur hissed, trying to shuffle his chair forward out of reach.
"Mon ami~" Francis hissed back, licking his lips as he looked into the others eyes like some form of strange perverted fox "You don't mean that!"
Arthur flushed in joint anger and embarrassment at the French boy's words "You bloody...I wouldn't go with you if you were the last thing on Earth!"
"Who said anything about that mon cher?" Francis let out a low seductive chuckle "however if you want to date moi? I won't object" he then proceeded to laugh at the uncomfortable look in the green eyes.
The headmaster had finally noticed the disturbance, coughing as he straightened up "Now then! Boys! Listen up, I have an announcement!" He cast his sunshine-like smile around the room again.
Sparing a last glare at the French boy, Arthur turned again to face the front
"The council have given just a job, a mission!" He stepped out from behind the stand, crossing into the centre of the stage and grinning at the German sat behind him towards the back of the stage with the other teachers "We have to perform a pantomime for the local primary schools this Christmas! You all know what one is?"
A few of the faces looked confused, but considering how many foreign students were at this school, it wasn't a surprise. A hand went up belonging to Yao Wang, one of the foreign students from China "I don't understand what you mean by a pantomime aru..."
The headmaster just smiled at Yao, jumping off the edge of the stage "A pantomime...well...I'm not really sure myself if i confess. Arthur Kirkland!" He spun around, making eye contact with the school's head boy "Care to explain old Chap?"
Arthur felt his face grow hot, one reason was because his head had once again tried to appeal to the Brit by using slang from the country, but seeing as he was Italian he didn't slip off his accented tongue as well, the other was the fact everyone turned to look at him "W-well, it's a sort of tradition...a kind of comedy play..."
"Come on, at least stand up~" The Italian just smiled at him "Everyone needs to hear!"
Arthur slowly stood, trying to figure out how to explain it "It's a form of comedy play for families...traditionally it's of a fairy tale or something similar…" he started "It's hard to explain..."
The Bad Touch Trio behind him looked up, grinning at each other as they gazed at his ass "Pretty good huh?" hissed the albino, looking over at the other two, knowing full well the English boy could hear there every word. "Of course~" purred Francis, nodding in agreement. Arthur tried to pretend he hadn't heard as he sat down hurriedly. "Si, but I have seen much better, beside who would want flimsy Ingleterra ass when you have the three of us?"
Arthur had to take deep breaths as he heard the three friend's snigger, it was taking a lot not to turn around and punch them all in the face.
The headmaster nodded, clambering back up onto the stage just as the bell rang out, signalling the start of first period. "And boys! This is your play so I need one of you to write and organise it, If anyone would like to organize this thing come to my office before the end of the day!" He cried, grinning around at them all.
Matthew followed the others out, deep in thought as an idea began to flesh out in his mind...
"Oi, Matthew!" From seemingly nowhere came a grinning American teenager, jabbing him in the side with his fingers, causing the quiet male to jerk sideways "Looks like you're plotting to kill someone down there! Whassup, bro?"
"Al! It's nothing...don't you have PE? If you're late again, they'll kick you off the team" Matthew asked defensively, sure his brother would laugh if he told him what he was really thinking about, so it was easier to direct his attention elsewhere, with TV, or sports…or a burger.
"Of course~" His sibling still wore the same grin, looking down on the other "You should join a sports team y'know, get some balls!"
"I've got better things to do than chase a ball" he answered quietly. Plus, he thought, everyone keeps mistaking us two, I'm not making it harder.
Alfred laughed, rubbing his siblings head to mess up the hair "Yeah! Chase other guys balls! Catch ya later Mattie!" And once again he was gone, vanishing into his cliché of friends and cheerleaders ready to fawn upon him. His twin sighed and carried on down the corridor, deep in thought, too deep maybe as he seemed to walk straight into a wall… that fell over, ok maybe it wasn't a wall.
"Okay, totally unawesome. What…" Gilbert growled, flicking his white hair out of his eyes as he straightened up again "What just walked into my awesomeness?"
"Ah, sorry!" Matthew looked up, temporarily shaken and just wanting to carry on as if this hadn't have happened.
"Mathieu?" The Frenchman beside gilbert looked down suddenly, smiling: "Bonjour! How did you get here?"
"Walking..." Matthew said shyly to his cousin. He stared up at the albino, recognising him as a member of the Bad Touch Trio, infamous around school for…various reasons. Apart from Francis, Matthew hadn't really met any of them except in passing, slightly worried by the rumours that circulated about them.
"Who?" Gilbert asked, looking down at the spot indicated by the Frenchman, the Spanish boy who had been following behind looked over, although still smiling Matthew could tell they was a flicker of doubt in his expression over who was in front of them.
"Mattie! My dear cousin~" The French boy just smiled, leaning across to kiss the other on both cheeks, muttering a greeting in his ear.
Matthew muttered it back, blushing a little as Francis was more affectionate than he thought was necessary "I...should get moving..."
"Oh!" Gilbert looked closer, smirking, the flash of recognition that ignited the red irises caused him to yell "Oh hi Alfred~"
"I-I'm not Alfred..." he corrected quietly, sighing. Did he look that much like his brother?
Francis slapped the other upside the head, causing him to whine in annoyance as he looked across "Oww!"
"That's Mathieu~" He smiled, "Look closer, He's much cuter, huh gilbert?" The Prussian actually looked, gazing closely at the boy standing in front of him. And for some strange reason couldn't quite work out how to speak...wow. He had very beautiful eyes...and his smile...And what the hell was he thinking?
"Francis!" Matthew blushed hard at this, pulling away as he noticed the gaze from those red eyes "I...need to get to class..."
"Class?" The Frenchman smiled "It's only nine thirty..." He spoke absent mindedly as he looked at his watch, Matthew went wide eyed and shot up in a panic, then looked over the other three seeing their calm demeanour.
"Aren't you guys worried about being late?" he asked, confused.
"Not really, mi amigo, what's the point of stressing over silly things like grades, when we can have fun and siesta and do something more interesting?" the brunette laughed, warmly oblivious to the hand Francis was sneaking around his waist.
"Oui, and has absolutely nothing to do with the fact we forgot to do our homework, see you later Mattie" Francis laughed, dragging the Spanish teen away, the Albino in tow.
"Bye birdie~" Gilbert smiled at him, not even realising what he'd just said...
The day seemed to be dragging on, and as far as Feliks was concerned, third period couldn't come quickly enough. Glad to be free of maths and PE, he darted into the drama studio, ignoring the other, rather boring students milling about as he headed straight towards the Canadian who was leaning against the wall "Mattie! Heya~"
"Hi" Matthew gave him a small smile "You're in a good mood Feliks."
The Polish boy giggled, pulling down the collar on his shirt with a smile "Love bites~" He purred: "Finally!"
"With who?" Matthew asked, blushing at the fact that he was so open about it. He had figured a while ago that he was into both guys and girls, much to his brother's amusement, but he tended to keep it to himself, unlike Feliks who, while he had never officially said he was gay, made it so obvious in his manner that most people figured it out within a short time of meeting him.
"Toris, of course!" He sat down beside the other, kicking his legs up onto the table: "But anyway! Saw you gazing at gilbert earlier~"
Matthew sighed, though it wasn't a surprise. To anyone who knew Feliks, they knew his uncanny ability to be the schools gossip queen, as well as probably the biggest queen in the school. "I wasn't looking where I was going and walked into him Feliks, that was all!"
"Oh, yeah?" He laughed, winking at him: "Caught you looking all puppy dog eyes at him…Thinking he's hot huh?"
"N-no! I mean..." Mattie flushed "I guess he's not bad but...he's friends with my cousin..."
"Friends with Francis just like Antonio is~" He purred, closing his eyes "You like the bad boys~?"
"I never liked Antonio! Besides, he thought I was Al...He probably doesn't even remember me..."
"Of course not!" Felix yawned, looking sideways at his friend: "Anyway! What got you daydreaming all morning? Bet you don't remember a thing from maths! Been dreaming of lusty red eyes hmm?"
"No! Feliks! Just thinking about that thing Mr Vargas mentioned in assembly…" Matthew mumbled, looking away from the Polish boy.
"Oooh..." Feliks smiled: "The pantomime thing?"
"Yeah...I mean..." Matthew sighed "I had an idea...I don't know if I could do it alone though..."
"You had a what?" The other squeaked, turning around in his chair and gazing at the other: "Fess up! Right now!"
"Well...I can't act that well...but I can write and I know how to direct..." Matthew sighed "No-one listens to me though"
"We all know you can write! You always get top marks for it, duh!" Feliks was interested now, smiling happily at the other: "So you can write and direct but you have no voice...hmmm...so why don't you just get a, like, voice?"
"Get a voice?" Matthew frowned "How do you mean?"
"Hmmmm..." The other pulled a pen from nowhere, biting the end of it in thought before suddenly scribbling something on a piece of paper: GET. A. BOYFRIEND.
Matthew blushed and crumpled it before anyone could see "I'm fine being single!"
"Mattie, Mattie, Mattie!" He laughed, leaning closer to him: "Look, I know you're as gay as me! Just get one, okay? What about asking Gilbert? I bet he would!"
"I don't fancy Gilbert!" Matthew blushed, looking up to check no-one had heard him "Besides, what if he's straight?"
"Oh fine, fine~" Felix pouted, poking himself: "Make me think my gaydar is all broken, why don't you like, totally just ask him to help because he's awesome?"
"He doesn't even know me!" Matthew argued. He sighed "Besides, I thought you would help me..."
The other went pale, cursing inwardly as he looked down: "N-no...Mattie you know i can't...I'd freak out, and like, look stupid again..."
"Again? But Feliks, you're so good at drama and backstage stuff...better than me…"
"Mattie! Don't you remember what happened last time anyone put me on a stage?" The polish boy flushed "Like, I'll help you backstage...but only..." His eyes lit up, smirking: "Only if you ask Gilbert to help you. And if you call him like, awesome when you do and he'll definitely agree!"
"No...You've never been on a proper stage since I came here...And why do I have to call him awesome?" the Canadian huffed.
"Oh yeah...you like, missed that. Heh! Anyway!" Changing the subject was always a good idea: "Because he has a huge head! And ego! And penis apparently~"
Matthew sighed "Fine...what have I got to lose anyway...?"
"Lose?" Feliks giggled: "Just your virginity!"
Matthew blushed "Honestly, you act so shy and then you say stuff like that!"
"Just the way I am~" The other smiled, swinging around to sit properly in his chair: "When you gonna go ask the head then? Lunchtime?"
"Guess so...although I don't know if anyone else will do it as well"
"Like, no! You think anyone was even listening?" asked the other, smiling over at him, "Anyways, the head likes you!"
"He likes Alfred" Matthew corrected "And can't tell us apart."
"So what? Most people can't! I'm still up for dying your hair pink~"
"I think that's a little drastic..."
"People would notice the difference~"
"Knowing my luck, they'd just go 'Oh, new hairstyle Alfred?'"
Feliks had to cover his mouth to stop the giggling, looking away from the other boy in amusement: "Oh yeah! Force that prick to make it obvious he's a faggoty fag just like us?"
"Al's not gay…he's done it with girls..." Matthew muttered shyly.
"What?" He frowned, yanking out his notebook from his bag: "Who? And where did he find them? All-boys school and he's getting girls~"
"Someone from that all-girls school down the road..." Matthew said "I don't remember her name..."
The other pouted, scribbling anyway: "How do you know? Was he boasting about it again?"
Matthew nodded "He was talking to her after school"
"Great!" Feliks just smiled: "I'll get Kiku on it straight away~ Next headline for the newspaper here I go~"
"Feliks! You can't publish that!"
"Like, I totally can~" he laughed, patting Mattie's shoulder just as the teacher appeared...
Hope this gets your interest!
Right, for those who don't know what a pantomime is (a fair few ^_^) It's a traditional family play set around a fairy story. There is ALWAYS a hero (traditionally played by a young girl or occasionally a young boy in tights) a love interest who has to sing, a villan who must be completely OTT and a dame who is a man in a large dress who throws sweets into the audience (although this is banned in some places for health and safety reasons). There is A LOT of innuendo and slapstick humour and they are often topical as well. I know very few people here in England who don't go to at least one in the holiday season, since nearly every theatre, drama club, church and school does one.
The English are mad. Get used to it.
The best thing I can suggest to those confused is to watch some, so here are youtube links to some (remove the spaces)
Dick Whittington (the dame in this is very good imho) http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v=9F87IvUBShY
Cinderella http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v=adb3Sfo_nE
Jack and the Beanstalk http : / / www . youtube . com / watch?v=I7KxO8VhxpA&feature=related
And by searching you can find many more ^_^
I hope you enjoy our fic! The next chapters behind you!