These are a collection of unfinished works by me. A few times in the past year I've begun to write something that just never took shape or form, but I wanted to post them onto my archive to keep all my fics together. There might be a slim (and I do mean very very slim) chance of me finishing one of these, BUT, I wouldn't have posted them here in the first place if I ever thought that possibility would actually come to fruitation.

Each work has an author's note that follows explaining my thoughts at the time and why I decided to even attempt these in the first place. Sorry if you think this is weird, just ignore them if that's the case. ;) I won't mind. :D XOXO Sharon

Created: December 8, 2007, 6:57am

Written: after High Society, based on Victor, Victrola

Tenatively Titled: Worthless

Worthless. What really is worth anyway? To most people in Chuck Bass' world, your worth is your money. But to Chuck Bass himself money doesn't cut it. Sure, he enjoyed his money to the fullest extent. He enjoyed his liquor, his parties, and his women. He enjoyed scandal and drama. He found it all very exciting.

The thing is, no one ever asked him why. Well, maybe they had—his father for instance. But he always gave his answer with a mischievous smirk, "Because I can."

That's not the real reason. In fact, no one—not Nathaniel, not Blair—had ever known what Chuck was thinking.

Worthless—we're back to that again. What does Chuck base worth on? Well, the answer lies with his father. Bart Bass spent years showing disapproval to Chuck. Everything Chuck did, nothing was ever good enough. He constantly compared Chuck to himself. Bart was a self-made man. He built his fortune from pennies. Chuck didn't work hard enough—especially not as hard as Bart had to work as a boy.

Chuck had resigned himself long ago to the fact that in his father's eyes he would always be worthless. Instead of continuing to search for that approval, he gave up and just became the most worthless human being possible. Why deny who you are, hmm?

The alcohol made him forget anything in life that was real. And who doesn't enjoy a good party? The women, well, they were truly something. Women were just as worthless as he. His opinion was slightly bias—he knew that. After all, his mother was a slut. His father kicked her out when he was ten. Evidently, she slept around—a lot. His father never remarried, but he saw all the women on his father's arm. All these women lining up to prove to his father just how worthless they were too.

None of the women lasted more than a night. His father had more important things to do than to worry about women. He went and he took and then he forgot. Chuck saw all this and he believed it. He believed all women were worthless—well almost all women. There was one that he found to be an exception to the rule.

Blair Waldorf. He had known her about as long as he had known Nathaniel. They went to school together, they grew up together; their lives revolved around each other. Blair and Nathaniel were his best friends in the world.

Maybe it was because he knew her before he was old enough to understand about worth. Maybe it was because he recognized from the beginning that she was different from every other girl. Whatever the reason, he felt like he wasn't too horrible of a person if Blair was willing to be his friend. He felt the same way about Nathanial.

In all the years that he knew Blair, he never once thought about her in any sexual way. He always knew that she belonged to Nathanial. He never once questioned it. He was always supportive and helpful to both of them. He would do anything for them because of this giant pedestal he had put them on in his mind.

When Blair showed up alone at Victrola that night, he was genuinely distressed to find out about Blair and Nathanial breaking up. He wanted to find out what happened so he could try to fix it. She wouldn't talk to him about it though. Instead she decided to let loose and have a little fun.

He almost wished she hadn't, because it was while he was standing there watching her do a little strip tease that he realized something fascinating. He realized that with everything she did—following society's dictates, everything her parents said to do—she was always dignified and intelligent. She was the perfect lady. She was also extremely hot and sexy. Even as she stood up there dancing, she was every inch the woman she is every day. Her performing didn't take away from her worth or make her seem slutty—nothing could ever do that.

The thought was disquieting. He found himself admiring her while she danced in front of and flirted with the crowd. He felt even more drawn to her. It was almost intoxicating to him. He never felt this way before and he didn't know what he was feeling.

Eventually they were in his limo. They were both a little buzzed from the alcohol. He looked at her and couldn't help himself. "You were amazing up there," he whispered.

She looked at him with her beautiful eyes so wide. He was ready to just leave it at that. The limo would drop her off; he'd go home, go to sleep, and completely forget about ever being attracted to Blair.

Then she started moving. She scooted over toward him and leaned forward to kiss him. It was a brief, but oh-so-hot, kiss. He pulled back, startled. She was looking deep into his eyes almost begging him for something she couldn't name. He really wanted to give her anything she wanted, but she wasn't like any other woman he'd been with. He found himself asking a question he had never asked before, "Are you sure?"

She leaned forward to kiss him again. That was all the answer he needed.

Love was not something he understood very well. The only person he loved was Nathaniel—like a brother. He didn't understand fairy tales and he didn't understand why men got married and spent their entire lives with one woman...

Unfinished.

This was actually the very first thing I ever wrote from Chuck's point of view (hence, there might be some tense problems). The first thing I ever wrote for Gossip Girl was actually from Nate's point of view ie: Karma, Chapter 1. This was very helpful in psychoanalyzing Chuck, but I ultimately abandoned this inside look at him because I felt like an idiot for attempting to write something with backstory that I did not know--like what happened to his mother.