[A/N] So, a friend of my kept nagging me to post this because I've had it written for a while, but I've been to lazy too... sorry! So, without further ado, here ya go! Hope you enjoy!

Oh, and I've included a reference to a future oneshot I'm going to write (PJ) - if you don't get it, sorry! It's not really pertinent to the story, though, so... yeah.

EDIT: I just now noticed some of the things (ie: bold letters, line breaks) didn't go through online, so hopefully, I corrected them.

HYBRID

Rose Tyler was pissed off. This was her 213th (or was it 214th?) jump, and she had just performed a temporal scan to identify the universe she had landed in, hoping it would be the right one. Really, she had expected to at least cross the right universe at least once, but no, she just can't get the right one, can she?

On top of that, nothing seemed extraordinary about this world. No aliens, "magic", teenage spies, so called gods and their children (Gods? She scoffed. More like impersonators without any real idea of origin. The god - no, Titan - of time, Kronos, was a sad excuse. Compared to her, he was like a puppy in a world of werewolves.) However, she couldn't really say anything yet - she had only been there 15 minutes.

So, Rose Tyler, once an average human, now a 343 year old time-person-thing (she'd have to ask the Doctor for the official terminology once she got back), started to walk off in a random direction through the large forest she seemed to have landed in to have a look around.

How wrong she was about the world being normal.

Expecting an average family to be in it, albeit a rich one, Rose Tyler had walked up to the modern house and knocked on the door, hoping to be able to get some directions to the nearest gas station so she could refuel her rations for the next jump (not that she needed them, but just to be on the safe side, of course)

What she didn't expect was to get a faceful of hormonal human. Apparently, Rose had interrupted his "Bella Time", as he'd dubbed it, and that was inexplicable.

"I'm sure you'll get plenty of that when you're older. Now, if you could please direct me to the nearest gas station, oh impatient one, I'd be glad to get out of your hair." the golden haired girl snarked.

The boy snorted, as if sharing a joke with someone, and pointed to the north. "It's that way. Now leave."

The snort made her suspicious, not because he had snorted, but because he had snorted after the first sentence, not the second, and as far as the time traveler was concerned, that was pretty messed up. Really, why would you snort at getting older; it's an average thing for everyone, right? (Well, unless you happened to be an egotistical alien going by the name of the Doctor or a once-human known as Rose Tyler.)

So, being the intrepid traveler she was, Rose Tyler asked the question that could get you killed on approximately 134 planets if you ask royalty, 256 if you ask someone who "knows people", and all 4,589,315 planets she knows of if you ask a woman (because everyone knows you should NEVER ask a lady this question along with "How much do you weigh?") :"How old are you?"

"17." The response was quick, almost natural, but it still had just the slightest bit of delay, as if he wanted to say something else. Yep, definitely not of the good ole' homo sapien variety. Now that she knew, she was surprised her instincts hadn't started acting up, because the man screamed out of this world! The gold eyes tinged with black, the unnatural stillness, and the predator-like vibe he gave off was just direct evidence of this.

What was he, though? Discreetly, she pulled out a hand-sized scanner to see if he could be matched up with anything in the Torchwood archive.

After awkwardly standing there for 30 seconds, the scanner chimed twice, and Rose glanced down to check the diagnosis.

Identified: Hybrid - Vampire/Unknown

Age: 117

Oh. That was... new.

"Hmm. Never met a vampire before. What's your other half, though?"

It is a known fact that any teenaged-vampire, especially ones named Edward Cullen, spending time with his [or her] girlfriend [or boyfriend] who just so happens to be "super adorable, super nice, and super interesting" (No matter what Rosalie, or Emmett, or Jasper, or anyone else says, she is all of those things! You guys just don't see it!) will not want it to be interrupted.

However, the "hateful" universe just loves to spite him and his cliche romance.

So, it just happens to drop a blonde off at his doorstep right as he was cuddling with Bella.

Answering the door with a complaint on his lips and a rant on his mind, Edward

As he continues on the conversation with the person at the door, then waits awkwardly for some reason, he is startled by the last statement stated.

"Hmm. Never met a vampire before. What's your other half?"

What? How could someone know what we are after they just met me? Nobody can know! Vampires are too secretive and special for a person to find us out, especially a blonde! Blondes are dumb!

"Hey, did you feel that?"

"Yes, it was quite a perculiar and sudden feeling."

"Hmm."

Rosalie Hale-Cullen and Carlisle Cullen were perplexed as to where the sudden urge to pummel Edward into oblivion came from.

And what did she mean by other half?

"Excuse me miss, I think you may be delusional. I am not a vampire, I am a human being, Now, please leave the premises along with your rude comments."

There. That'd get rid of her.

"Ello, vampire, here's one thing you need to know - scanner doesn't lie. So, you can tell me your half, or I can report you to Torchwood for refusing to identify yourself."

Or maybe not.

"Look, I don't know what you're smoking, but you better get away from here before I make you."

"Using force against an agent?" she responded. "I'm pretty sure I can kill you for that, mate. Just saying. However, I won't because I'm generally a non-violent person."

Oh.

"However, I will threaten you, without a doubt. So, what are you weak against: sunlight, stakes, garlic? The generic holy water?"

Ok, so she knew they were vampires, but not what type.

"You gonna answer, vampire?"

So how did she know?

"'Ello?"

How?

"'Eeeeellllllllooooo up there?"

HOW?

"OI! BLOODSUCKER, LISTEN TO ME!" and a resounding crack! sound reverberated around them.

She slapped him! She had actually slapped him!

"Wonderful. The cannon's all charged up now- and honestly, I'm skipping out on refilling rations- if one alien was like this, I wonder what the rest will be like."

And then she had the nerve to speak rude gibberish! What a rude, violent, inconsiderate girl!

And for the second time today, a cracking noise filled the air, but this time without the pain.

The girl was gone, and Edward could only say one thing, eerily reminiscent of when a certain Doctor met a certain redhead.

"What."

"WHAT."