A/N: Set in a world where Addison didn't leave Seattle. As per anything medical isn't exactly perfect. Reviews please =)
In the months that followed Addison's trip to LA she became a shadow of her former self. She threw herself into work. All she did was work. And not in a good way. In the way that made everyone around her, even those who didn't really consider her as a friend, worry. Because the more she worked the less she played. She could go 4 days without leaving the hospital. The weight dropped off her as all she lived on was coffee and whatever she could grab from the coffee cart. And whenever someone tried to mention it she would just tell them she was fine. But she wasn't.
Addison was broken. She was tired. She had nothing left to give. She saw herself as a failure. Derek, failed. Mark, failed. Alex, failed. Any hope of a family, failed. The only thing she didn't fail at was work. So that's what she would do. She dropped everything other than work. No thinking about men. No thinking about a family. Just work. And everything else in her life disappeared because of it. She didn't really notice the weight slipping off her, it wasn't something that bothered her, she was never conscious of that so when people, meaning Callie and Bailey, voiced their concerns she just brushed it off, because she felt fine, in that respect she felt fine. She failed to mention the raging headaches she suffered from every day from lack of food and sleep.
She didn't know why she did it. That wasn't the purpose when she stepped into that stall in the women's bathroom. She had a headache. So she was taking some painkillers, strong ones. So she took the required dosage. 2 pills. And then another 2, because it really did hurt. And it was as if something inside her took over. That part of her that told herself she was a failure, that nobody would notice if she was missing, she refused to believe that Alex would, that part of her took charge. And just kept feeding the pills into her mouth. And it didn't take long for her world to become hazy and she was slipping from the toilet and onto the floor, her hand poking out of the stall with the empty pill bottle loosely sat in it.
~x~
Meredith walked into the women's bathroom humming to herself, she quickly used the toilet and then moved over to the sink and washed her hands, she looked up to the mirror and frowned at the sight of a hand underneath one of the cubicles. And then she noticed the pill bottle. And then she panicked, she got down on her hands and knees and gasped when she realized exactly what had gone on. And more importantly who it was.
"Addison" she said shaking the hand "Addison can you hear me?" she didn't even get a groan in response, she shot up from the floor and opened the door "I need some help in here!" she shouted, Alex and Izzie ran towards her.
"I think she overdosed"
"Who?" asked Izzie.
"Addison"
"Oh my god" Alex gasped "Move back, I'm going to break down the door" he said bashing himself up against it, it didn't take long for the door to give in, Alex instantly dragged Addison out of the stall so she lay flat on the floor, the empty bottle of pills falling from her hand "Come on Addison don't do this" he said patting her face a little "She's got a pulse, it's weak but its there" he said pressing his fingers against the pulse point on her neck.
"Alex we need to get her checked out" Meredith said urgently.
Alex wrapped Addison's limp arms around his neck and scooped her up from the floor rushing her from the bathroom and into the nearest exam room.
"We need IV fluids and I think we should prepare for a Gastric Lavage" Alex rambled as he hooked her up onto the machines "Come on Addison, wake up" he said tapping her face again "Please wake up"
"What the hell happened?" the Chief said bursting into the room.
"She overdosed on pain killers Sir" Izzie said sadly.
"Well, lets get to work"
~x~
"How is she?" Callie said as Meredith left Addison's hospital room, Callie, Mark, Derek and Izzie had all waited not so patiently outside of the room as the Chief, Bailey, Alex and Meredith worked inside.
"We had to put in a breathing tube to do the lavage which seemed to work but now, now we just have to wait"
"She's been pulling away, all this time she's been pulling away and, I should have seen the signs" Callie said with teary eyes "I should have seen it coming"
"Hey" Mark said pulling her into a hug "She's been pulling away from all of us Callie, I, god I, we all could have done more but, we can't and, all we can do now is be there for her"
"I can't believe this" Derek sighed running a hand over his face "Why would she do this?"
"Maybe because she's broken inside!" Callie snapped "You broke her, you all broke her and, maybe she's just sick of being let down! I need to see her"
"Sure" Meredith said softly "But just, prepare yourself, she doesn't, she doesn't look good"
Callie followed Meredith into the room and couldn't help but let out a sob at an intubated pale Addison, she rushed over to the bed and grabbed her hand.
"Come on Addie, don't let them win, don't do this to me" Callie said with a sob "You're the best friend I have ever had, ever and I need you, I need you so please, please wake up for me"
"She'll pull through it" Bailey said placing a hand on Callie's shoulder "She's Addison, she has to pull through it"
"What if she doesn't?" Callie whispered.
"She will" Alex said firmly from the other side of the bed "She will pull through it"
"You do not get to speak to me" Callie snapped "This is all your fault, ever since you and them and LA she's, she's been pulling away and working herself into the ground, look at her Alex, there's nothing left of her, she's skin and fucking bones, she's not my Addie anymore"
"Believe me Callie I've been blaming myself since the second I pulled her from that stall" Alex said sadly "If I could go back I would, we all would, we've all seen it, her pulling away, we could have been better"
"This isn't the time to start pointing fingers" said Bailey.
"Bailey's right" said Meredith "We need to concentrate on her getting better, this is nobody's fault"
"She just moved her hand" said the Chief "She's trying to wake up"
"Let's give it a try" Bailey said switching off the machine "Addison you've got 30 seconds to breathe or it's going back on"
They all watched Addison carefully as the time ticked away.
"15 seconds" said Meredith.
"I swear to god Addison if you don't breathe I will kill you" Callie barked.
Addison took in a deep breath, her eyes wide, her hand shooting up to the breathing tube in her mouth "Leave it alone" Alex said grabbing her hand "Just relax, relax for a second we've got you"
"Oxygens already in the 90s" said the Chief "Let's take it out"
"Let me do it" said Meredith walking over to the bed "Just watch me Addison ok?"
Addison blinked a little and looked into Meredith's eyes as the breathing tube was quickly removed, she coughed and choked a little and took a breath.
"It's okay" Meredith said soothingly "It's okay, just breathe"
"I…." Addison choked.
"Don't try and speak sweetie" said Callie "Just breathe for me"
"I'm sorry" Addison said hoarsely.
"Sshhh, it's ok" Callie said brushing the hair from Addison's forehead "It's ok"
"I just wanted it to stop" Addison said with a sob.
"I know honey" Callie said with teary eyes "I know"
"I'm really tired" Addison whispered "So tired"
"Close your eyes Addison" the Chief said softly "Sleep for a little while"
"Ok" Addison said quietly, her eyes closing as she drifted to sleep.
"We should go and tell the others" said Meredith "We should, we should give her some time"
"Your right" said Bailey "You'll stay with her Callie?"
"Of course" Callie nodded.
"Alex, come on" said Meredith.
"I'm not going anywhere" Alex said firmly.
"Alex" Meredith sighed.
"I'm not leaving her"
"Come on Meredith, let's just go" the Chief said leading her out with Bailey.
"What's going on?" Mark said quickly.
"She's going to be fine" the Chief sighed "Breathing tubes out, she's been talking, we're just, we're letting her sleep"
"She's never done anything like this before" Derek said quietly "Never"
"She said, she said she just wanted it to stop" the Chief said sadly "We need to give her some time, she won't talk until she's ready"
"So what happens now?" asked Mark.
"We just wait" said Izzie "We wait for her to be ready"
~x~
"Hey, you're awake" Meredith said sitting up slightly as Addison's eyes opened.
"Water" Addison whispered.
Meredith stood and poured a small glass of water "Small sips" she said passing the cup over "I made Callie and Alex go and get coffee, they haven't moved all night"
"I slept all night?"
"You were tired" Meredith said softly "Look, I'm going to say something now and you're going to listen ok?"
"If…."
"Addison" Meredith glared.
"Ok"
"When I was in that water, I fought, I'd had every last bit of wind knocked out of me but I fought, I fought until I didn't"
"Wha…."
"Let me finish" Meredith breathed "There was this one tiny split second, literally a second when I just thought, whats the point, my mother hates me, I'm just a disappointment, I failed her, so whats the point, so I stopped fighting, and when something inside my head clicked, telling me how stupid I was being, it was too late and then Derek, Derek pulled me out of that water and brought me here where they did everything they could to get me back, I found you Addison, I found you and Alex pulled you out of that stall, and we did not just put all that work in for nothing so if you ever, ever try anything like that again you will not know what's hit you"
"I'm so sorry" Addison said letting the tears fall "I'm so sorry, I, I didn't mean to do it I just, I had a headache and, I just kept taking them and, I don't know why"
"Hey, hey it's ok" Meredith said soothingly perching herself on the edge of the bed and wiping the tears from Addison's cheek "It's ok, we can get you through this Addison, you haven't been yourself in months and, we should have pushed you more, to talk, and, we're here now, all of us and well, I literally had to drag Alex out of here, he's not going anywhere fast"
"Funny, he couldn't get out of our, thing, fast enough"
"You had a thing" Meredith said with a raised eyebrow.
"I slept with him, once, the day before I went to LA"
"Let me guess, he pushed you away after, made you feel like crap"
"Yeah" Addison sighed.
"That's just Alex" Meredith said sadly "He's as dark and twisty as I was, as I still am sometimes, he probably just got scared of his own feelings, I think this, you doing this, has made him realize his mistakes"
"It's just too hard" Addison whispered.
"We'll get you through it, I promise"
"Thank you" Addison said quietly "You have permission to kick my ass ok?"
"Ok" Meredith laughed.
~x~
"So, why am I here today Addison" Dr Wyatt asked sitting in the chair next to Addison's bed.
"Because the Chief asked you" Addison said dryly.
"Unless you can tell me the reason I can't help you"
"Fine" Addison sighed "We're here today because I took a few too many painkillers"
"And why was that?"
"I had a headache, I wanted the pain to stop"
"You should have seen a doctor"
"I am a doctor"
"So you should know that you should have only took 2 of those pills"
"I don't know why I took them all ok? I just wanted the pain to stop"
"You stopped coming to see me after LA, we made some great progress over that year and then you stopped, why is that?"
"I didn't have time"
"I've been told you've been working 4 day shifts without leaving the hospital, why is that?"
"I enjoy my work"
"At the risk of your health?"
"There's nothing wrong with my health!"
"You've lost a considerable amount of weight since I last saw you"
"I don't skip meals on purpose, I've never had a problem with my weight, sometimes I'm just too busy, so I have coffee and something off the cart, I know I should take better care of myself, I know that"
"So if we bring you a full meal right now you'd eat it"
"Yes" Addison said simply "I promise you Dr Wyatt, it's not about my looks, it never has been"
"Then what is it about?" Dr Wyatt asked softly.
"Everything else" Addison sighed.
"What changed after LA?"
"I found out I can't have kids, when I was there I was going to use a donor and my best friend from med school, Naomi, she ran all the tests and, I can't have kids"
"Well I'm sorry Addison, I know you wanted a family"
"Yeah" Addison sighed.
"There are other options, adoption for instance"
"They don't tend to hand out kids to single divorced women who overdose"
"Plenty of single women can adopt, and if you stick with this, with me, and we work through your problems, I can write you a very good letter of recommendation, if you put in the work"
"I just want it all to stop, the pain"
"Addison, what pain?" Dr Wyatt asked softly.
"My heart" Addison said raising her hand to her chest "It hurts, I just want it to stop"
"We'll work through it Addison, I want to see you twice a week, no exceptions"
"But…."
"Addison, twice a week"
"Ok, fine, ok" Addison sighed "Twice a week, when can I get back to work?"
"Health wise the Chief said in a week, I'm recommending at least a month off all together"
"A month!" Addison exclaimed "But my patients…."
"Need a doctor who is not at risk to herself or to them, a month, no exceptions"
"Fine" Addison huffed.
~x~
"We can't let her go back to the hotel" Callie whispered as herself, Bailey, the Chief, Meredith and Alex stood in the corner of Addison's room in a huddle.
"Callie's right" said Meredith "I don't think it would be a good idea"
"I guess I could stay with her" Callie shrugged "But then I can't be there all the time"
"So what? Someone has to be watching her 24/7?" asked Alex.
"I know she's saying she's fine but, she could do this again" said Bailey.
"I'm taking no chances" said the Chief "She needs people around her, not smothering her, just around her"
"Can you people stop talking about me like I'm not here" Addison said loudly, they all turned to look at her with sheepish smiles "I'm fine, really, I just want to get out of here"
"She could come and stay with us" Meredith said quietly "It's not like Derek's there anymore, there are enough of us there to have at least one of us with her every day"
"She can have my room, I'll sleep on the sofa" said Alex.
"I'm ok with that" the Chief nodded.
"Hello!" Addison said loudly "Can I go home yet?"
"Not exactly" Bailey said turning to her "Meredith is going to take you to the hotel to get some clothes and then you're staying at her house"
"What?" Addison exclaimed "Why?"
"Addison, if you think I'm leaving you on your own after this…." the Chief started.
"I don't need a babysitter Richard!" Addison snapped.
"Well quite frankly Addison I don't give a damn what you want!" the Chief said loudly "I am not risking you putting everyone through that again, I know it's tough on you, I know you're going through a hard time but do you think this is easy for us? Seeing you like this? It's not easy! So you are going to stay with Meredith and Karev and Stevens for as long as it takes to trust you again"
"And you're agreeing to this Callie?" Addison said glaring at her best friend.
"Addie" Callie sighed walking over to the bed and sitting on the edge "I just want you to get better, if I, if I lose you I…." Callie said, her voice cracking into a sob "I can't lose you Addison"
"You're not going to lose me" Addison whispered "I'll be here no matter what"
"You're not going to be much use to me if you're dead!" Callie snapped harshly, Addison flinched a little at her tone "Oh god Addie" Callie sighed dropping her head a little "Just do this for me ok?"
"Ok" Addison sighed "Fine, ok, but if you try and baby me…."
"We won't" Meredith said firmly "Believe me, after the drowning thing, people hovering, drove me up the wall"
"So we're on the same page then?"
"We're on the same page" Meredith nodded.
~x~
"OK, Izzie changes the towels in the bathroom every morning, use anything you want in there, it's the last door on the right, my bedrooms the one opposite, that ones Izzie's and this is Alex's" Meredith said opening the door "Wow, he actually cleaned it" she smirked "You should count yourself lucky" she said with a laugh.
"Right" Addison said with a small smile "Well uh, thanks"
"I know this is weird but, you scared the shit out of everyone Addison"
"I know" Addison sighed sitting down on the edge of the bed "I really am sorry y'know"
"I know" Meredith smiled softly "Well, I'll be right down the hall if you need anything"
"Thanks, I'll be fine, scouts honor"
"Goodnight Addison" Meredith laughed.
"Night Meredith" Addison said with a small smile.
~x~
"Come in" Addison shouted as there was a knock on the bedroom door 10 minutes after Meredith left.
"Hey, I just need to grab a few things" Alex said sticking his head into the room.
"Sure" Addison said with a smile "It's your room Alex"
"Right" Alex said with a laugh.
"Just ask" Addison said simply as Alex shifted nervously around his room picking up a pair of old sweats and a t-shirt.
"Wha...what?" he stuttered.
"You want to ask if I'm ok, you ask, I say I'm fine, you say are you sure, then I say I am, then you do this awkward stuttery goodbye thing and leave"
"Your a little crazy you get that right?"
"I tried to kill myself Alex, crazy is probably an understatement" she laughed, she looked at him as his face dropped "Too soon to joke about it?" she asked sheepishly.
"Just a little" he sighed.
"You feel guilty" she stated.
"Yes" he replied honestly.
"You think it's your fault"
"Yeah"
"Well it's not, it's my fault, so can you stop blaming yourself?"
"I just hate that, that I didn't see it, well I did but, I wish I'd have spoken to you, told you to stop pulling away from everyone, we could all see how down you were and, we should have done more"
"I did this to myself Alex" Addison sighed "It's as simple as that"
"God Addison if, if you'd had, if Meredith hadn't…." Alex stuttered with a slight choke.
"Alex I'm fine" Addison stressed "I'm getting better, I'm getting help, I'm fine"
"Look, I know you hate me but, but I really need to hold you right now ok?" Alex whispered hoarsely, Addison stood slowly and took his hand, she moved it to rest on her heart.
"Can you feel that? That's my heartbeat Alex, i'm here, I'm ok" she said softly "I'm here Alex"
Alex pulled her into his arms, holding her tight into his body "I'm so sorry" he whispered into her hair "Please Addison, please don't leave me, please, I know I hurt you, I know that, but I love you, I really really love you, you can't do this, you have to get better, you have too"
"Alex" she whispered shakily burying her head into his body "Your only saying that because of what I did"
"Addison" he said holding her back a little "I'm saying it because I love you"
"I, I can't Alex" she sighed "I need, I need to get better, I need to be myself again before I can, I just need to get better"
"I understand" he nodded "I do, I understand but, I have something for you ok" he said moving over to his bedside table, he dug around a little and pulled out a jewelry box "This was my grandmothers" he said holding it tightly in his hands "She died when I was 7, she gave me this, nobody in my family knows I have it, I've kept it hidden since the minute it was put in my hands, my dad would have sold it within seconds, she told me, when you find the girl you want to spend your whole life with, give this to her, she wore it everyday from the minute my grandfather gave it to her on their wedding day, even after he died, I want you to have it" he said opening the box to reveal a gold chain with 3 daisies made from pearls with amethysts in the centre.
"Alex I, I can't take this" Addison gasped brushing her fingers against it.
"You don't really have a choice" he said taking it from the box and fastening it around her neck.
"Alex" she sighed dropping her head against his shoulder "You're making it really hard to forget you"
"I don't want you to forget me" he said kissing the top of her head "I love you Addison, and I'll wait for you" he said squeezing her hand "Have a good sleep" he kissed her forehead softly and then left the room, Addison sat on the edge of the bed with a sigh, her hand instantly moving to the necklace.
~x~
"So he loves you" Dr Wyatt said later that week as Addison sat in her office.
"Yeah" Addison sighed playing with the necklace.
"And how do you feel about him?"
"I want to hate him, I want to forget him, he really hurt me, he saw everything that happened with Derek and Mark and, and he hurt me like they did and, I know in the end I hurt Mark but, when we were in New York, Mark hurt me, and Derek hurt me there and here and, and Alex knew all this and, and he treated me like another one of his conquests, and I really thought I meant more than that to him"
"You obviously did, you obviously do"
"I know" Addison said biting her lip a little "But I'm just, I'm not ready to start something, with anyone, not just him"
"I agree" Dr Wyatt nodded "You need to spend a little bit of time thinking about yourself, how's your eating coming along?"
"Fine, normal" said Addison "Izzie's been baking a ton of muffins almost every day" she said with a laugh "And Callie's been coming over to cook, I must look god awful if she's willing to cook in the kitchen where her husband cheated on her, but then I guess I must be a little weird for staying in the house of the woman my husband left me for, not that I had a choice"
"How does that make you feel? Because if it's a real problem being there, with her, with Alex, I can insist that you stay somewhere else"
"It's actually ok" Addison nodded "I've never really had a problem with Meredith, well I kind of did but, I've never hated her and, she gets me, she gets that split second decision, after the drowning thing, she gets when I need someone with me and when I don't, she doesn't hover, she's actually pretty fun, I think if she were still with Derek it might be a problem, I don't think I could stay there if he was, I do think they should get back together though, this break up thing is a little pathetic"
"That's very, big of you" Dr Wyatt said with a small smirk.
"He might of hurt me but I hurt him too, I just want him to be happy"
"And staying with Alex?"
"It's ok" Addison sighed "I don't really see him a lot, I think he's avoiding me, which I'm kind of grateful for, but then there's this" she said clutching at the necklace again "Makes him hard to forget"
"You could just take it off"
"No" Addison said shaking her head "It means a lot to him, his grandmother wore it every single day after her husband gave it to her on their wedding day, the only day she took it off was when she gave it to Alex just before she died, I'm not taking it off"
"Ok then" Dr Wyatt nodded "Well, that's our time up, you're doing very well already Addison, I'll see you in a couple of days"
"Yeah" Addison said standing up "Thank you"
"I didn't do anything, I'm just here to listen"
Addison sent her a small smile before leaving the office and making her way back to the Grey house.
~x~
"I just don't know what to do anymore" Addison heard Alex say as she approached the kitchen, she stopped short of walking in.
"You just have to wait Alex" she heard Meredith say softly "I know you love her but, she's not ready yet, you have to wait for her to be ready"
"I know" Alex said sadly "All I want is for her to be better, for her not to feel that way, I just want her better"
"Dr Wyatt's pretty much a genius, she can be brutal and a bit of a pain in the ass but, she's the best" Meredith sighed "She'll get through this Alex, you just have to wait"
"I know" Alex sighed, Addison took a breath and entered the room with a slight cough.
"Hey!" Meredith smiled "How'd it go?"
"Good" Addison nodded "It felt good anyway"
"Good" Meredith smiled.
"I have to go" Alex said standing up and leaving the room, Addison let out a sigh and sat down in the chair he left.
"This is really getting to him" Meredith said softly.
"I know" Addison sighed "I'm just, I'm not ready, and Dr Wyatt agrees with me, it's a time to think about me, about my life, I can't, I can't get into all of that, not yet"
"I know" Meredith said squeezing her hand "And he knows that too but, he, he just needs some time I think, to get used to it"
"I know" Addison said quietly.
~x~
1 month later.
"I can come back to work now right?" Addison asked impatiently as she sat in Dr Wyatt's office.
"You can come back to work" Dr Wyatt smiled "I'm really impressed Addison, you've done really well….that doesn't mean you're going to stop seeing me but, once a week should be enough from now on"
"Thank you" Addison smiled "For everything, I'm, I'm starting to feel like myself again now, except I'm pretty desperate for a surgery"
"I can only imagine" Dr Wyatt laughed "I'll call the Chief, you get going"
"Thank you" Addison shouted running from the room and straight into Alex "Ahhh" she yelped.
"Sorry" he laughed as he steadied her "It's just, it's been a month"
"Wanna scrub in?" Addison asked with a grin.
"Addison that's, that's great" he said hugging her.
"I'm serious, I'm going to steal whatever surgery's on the board right now, want to scrub in?"
"Ok" Alex laughed "Let's go"
~x~
"Ahhh, that's better" Addison sighed as she walked into the scrub room taking off her gloves and mask.
"It was like you've never been away" Alex smiled as they started to scrub out "Your, your still wearing it" he said glancing at the necklace.
"I haven't take it off" she whispered playing with it in her fingers "Alex I, I know it's been a month and, I know I've probably messed you around a little bit but, I'm getting there, I promise you that, I'm not there yet but, I'm getting there"
"Ok" Alex said simply.
"Ok" Addison smiled.
~x~
2 weeks later.
"Do you think you're ready?" asked Dr Wyatt.
"I think I'm ready but do you think I'm ready?" Addison asked.
"I think you're ready" Dr Wyatt nodded "But you have to be honest with him, and with yourself"
"Ok" Addison nodded "Ok then" she smiled.
~x~
"Alex!" Addison said loudly as she approached him in the cafeteria.
"Whats wrong?" he frowned standing up and stepping towards her, Addison merely smiled and crashed her lips against his, his arms wrapped around her waist holding her to him tightly, hers moved around his neck as their tongues meshed together.
"I love you too" she breathed as they pulled away "I'm ready, I'm so ready, and I'm scared and I really can't be hurt again and, I'm putting myself all in this and, you have to do that too, because if you don't then…"
"Addison" he said cutting her off "I couldn't be more in this, I love you so much, I love you, and I'm scared too, I am but, we can do this, we can do this" he said kissing her softly "I love you"
"You can have your bed back now" Addison whispered into his ear.
"As long as you stay in it" Alex whispered back.
~x~
"Oh god" Addison breathed rolling onto her back "That was amazing"
"I know" Alex panted "You're incredible, you're just….I love you" he said kissing her neck "I love you"
"I love you too" she smiled kissing him softly.
"You're beautiful" he said as he ran his fingers through her hair "You're so, beautiful, don't you ever think any different ok?"
"Ok" she whispered "I'm ok though Alex, you know that right? It's going to be something which, I'm sure will stay with us forever but, I'm ok, I promise you"
"I was so scared" Alex whispered as he cupped her cheek "When I had to break that door down and, and start the treatment it, it was adrenaline that got me through Addie because I was so scared"
"I'm so sorry" she said kissing him softly "I'm so sorry I put you through that, I'm so sorry"
"Just promise me, promise that if you're feeling down, even if it's something you think is small, you need to tell me Addison, promise me, promise me you'll tell me"
"I promise" she said squeezing his hand "I promise you"
"I love you so much" he whispered kissing her "And I'll never leave you again Adds, I promise, I'm serious, this is it, this is forever for me, for us"
"I love you" Addison said tearfully nuzzling her face into the nape of his neck "I'm not going anywhere, I promise, I love you, I love you"
Alex held her close into his body, his hands stroking through her hair and along her back, they shared small kisses and slowly fell to sleep.
~x~ ~x~ ~x~
A/N: So I had the idea of the necklace thing and wanted it to resemble a real existing necklace, so I searched for vintage jewellry and found this one, here's a link (Obv replace [dot] and [slash] and don't put in a www)::
i48[dot]tinypic[dot]com[slash]23wprpf[dot]jpg
I think it's pretty beautiful =)