What defines a poem

No one really knows

There are short ones

And some that are long

Ones that rhyme

And them that don't

A few make sense

Many are confusing

But they all in a way

Get an idea across

Its nighttime and here I am waiting

For another day to come and go

Lost in my deep depressing thinking

Changing from high to really low

Stuck at home reduced to sitting

Should I tell him I love him so

Staring at the wall I feel like hitting

That's my anger, which I know

To let it go on without any fixing

Would be a bad choice, so no

I won't be thought of as nothing

And life can go on like a show

Heartbroken and alone I sit in my room

Staring at my window as the rain falls

And then there is the thunder boom

Surely it must be my death that it calls

Lightning zigzags across the black sky

Electricity hovers in the air around me

Finally I am able to start to endlessly cry

I guess we were just never meant to be

The storm beckons me to go outside

Do I resist for a touch longer or give in

I'm sucked in to this never ending riptide

If I fight I know I won't be able to win

Giving in I step out and into my doom

Rain mixing with the tears on my cheeks

It's impossible not to feel the gloom

As this is the end of all of my weeks

Anxious for the final bell to ring

I want to talk to him so much

But what do I say

How do I express it

Start by how much you love him

But is that way too simple

My worried thoughts

They jumble together

Should I say how I miss everything

Or does that give him power over me

Too little time

To think straight

The bell rings at its normal time

My knees start to shake and tremble

Will I make it

Or turn into jello

No more time to seem unsure

He's watching me get closer

Confidence lacking

I start to speak

Words I need to say come naturally

And it all turns out sounding great

No more worries

Take a breath

You can't read my mind

I'm sure no one can

It's a jumbled mess

Not a perfect ten

My tears caress my cheek

Making me feel slightly better

As I succumb to the darkness inside

Here I sit alone

Stuck in this ever going

Circle of nothing

It makes me wonder

Do you really care for me

Or is this a joke

Just something you do

That really entertains you

When you get so bored

It's good when you try

But then you let it all go

As you always do

And I'm single now

But I still catch you staring

So much for never

Whenever I think of you I always wonder about

A couple of different things that I shouldn't question

Like why everything's brighter when I am with you

Or why it's always sunny when we make plans to meet

How my heart races when you hug me tight

Or how I'm so light when you lift me up high

The way your lips stay so soft after every long kiss

And especially why I must love you like this

Your head hurts but you still take another sip

Trying to drown out all of your pain

But it's never going to work and you know it

That's why the guns in your pocket

The plan is branded in your mind as you leave

You stand out by your expensive new car

You never liked it much anyway

And you pull out your loaded gun

Make sure the parking lot is clear

And the loud shot rings out as you fall

You take out your shiny sharp blade

And look down at your soft white wrist

It's crisscrossed with scars of past pains

And you feel the blood pumping in your veins

You remember the taste of the dark red fluid

Oh how you just can't wait for it to flood your mouth

As the blade draws nearer and nearer your hand

You stop and the thought of the new guy hits you

The way he looks crosses your scattered mind

And a new emotion fills your chest

The blade slowly falls to the ground

You just realized you're in love with him

Now I know how you must feel

Watching me with another guy

The feeling of insane jealousy

Over someone else you know

Maybe your happily ever after

Was never really meant to be

Because your ex is smiling

And you're down in the dumps

They seem to be in the clouds

Without needing your wings

And you're falling into darkness

And you're drowning in the tears

Because you still love that jerk

My stomach rumbles as the clock moves slower

Lunch may be just an hour away but it's not

I suck in my tummy trying to get the growling to stop

It only gets louder until it's the only thing I hear

Half hour until lunch but I can barely focus

The thought of food seems to fill my entire mind

Tacos, milkshakes, French fries, warm apple pie,

Strawberries, chocolate, and cool lemon meringue

Oh how I can't take any more of this nonsense

And finally just finally the lunch bell rings

I started a new chapter this past year

I'm not the me I was; I'm living now

I have broken my heart by dating guys

Things have happened I can't dream of

And I am confused enough to last forever

So here's to a start of a brand new year

That's filled with fun, parties, love, and lies

That's interesting beyond any comparison

And that gives me my wings to finally fly

I stare blankly at the empty page

So many emotions and feelings

They fill me up and then some

But there's no words for any of it

We can start out by agreeing

Love is such a beautiful thing

Heartbreak and unreturned crushes

That's what really hurts inside

Everyone should know one simple thing

Sometimes you need to fall hard

To find the most glorious happiness

And to live life to the fullest

You have to have no regrets

Because you should live for today

Not yesterday or even the future

Today is the day you can change

I miss your smiles and your laughs

I miss that cute little yawn you have

I miss feeling your arms wrapped around me

I miss they way you would look at me

I miss your kisses and the taste of your lips

I miss you making my heart beats skip

I miss loving you and feeling so loved

I miss how you could always make me blush

I miss when the butterflies filled me up

I miss trusting you with all my heart

I miss calling you mine; selfish me

I wish I could go back to the old days

No one judged you on what you said

What you wore with something else

Or even who you sat with at lunch

You could be yourself so easily

And definitely without a second thought

No one dared classified you as an emo

Jock prep tomboy gay straight or bi

It never used to matter because back then

A person was a person no matter what

There were no rumors flying through the school

No gossip teasing or inside jokes

You were always included in a game

Never left out or ignored

Dating was never heard of

And boys still had cooties

Wearing makeup was for older girls

And dress up was the most popular thing

Princesses fairies and Barbie dolls

Life could not get any better

It only gets more complicated

Even now time flies by unintentionally

Waiting by the phone for a call

Checking your cell for a text that isn't there

Getting up early for middle school

Back then you wanted to grow up

Now you wish you could go back

Drawing on a piece of paper

Not what I normally draw

No whole hearts for love

No flowers for friends

No wolves for strength

No vampires for a different reality

No wings to represent me

No scribbles as I think

I'm not thinking

I'm not dreaming

I'm just here and my hand is moving

Broken hearts and moons behind clouds

Where will my life lead me next

I wonder

Confusion sets in as I look around

A crease between my brown eyes

Another note another random guess

On who could say these lies

Or do they happen to be truths

That mysteriously haunt my locker

Only placed there before lunch

By a shy person or a talker

Sitting in a room all alone

Feeling like I'm closed in

A small tiny black box

Part of my deepest sin

He's the start of my war and the end of my humanity

The sanity has left me and my little bit of soul I have

My heart is in pieces and crushed and stepped upon

Left all alone on the floor rotting with my confidence

Lifeless eyes have betrayed me time and time again

As you stare at me from across the cold lonely room

Frozen in place I try to look away but it is too late

You've caught me staring and now you turn away

The betrayal of what I have done wafts toward me

Silent breezes carrying messages I don't want to hear

It's always when you're left all alone to think that the worst memories hit you

Your heart slowly breaks for the millionth time and you start to cry all over again

It doesn't mean you're weak or depressed just that you loved him a lot

Giving him up is your only option left but the words won't leave you lips

He has moved on and you're left to wonder why you can't leave him behind

You've thought about loving another guy but he doesn't add up to your ex

Two totally different people oblivious to their fight to get your attention

With love you get the good and then the bad and you literally can't take it

Confused and heartbroken you are on the edge of giving up your love life

Seeing him in the halls causes butterflies to start attacking your tummy

Why can't you make them go away when he so clearly seems to hate you

Regretting the words that you said to get you into this horrible situation

Maybe you have turned into an emo as everyone else seems to think

Stereotyped into a group that no one can really ever try to understand

Then you realize that they might finally leave you alone like you want