Forever
I can't believe she's walking away. Just like that. How could she think I don't want her anymore? I do. I want to be with her. Forever. But she got jealous over nothing. I don't want to be with Ryan. Honestly, I had no desire to be with him or near him at all. We were forced together to work on this bonfire. Sharing a tent with him was my choice, yes. But it was perfectly innocent! Nothing happened. We didn't share a sleeping bag! Cohen got his signals crossed, as usual. He can never say anything right, can he?
Ryan told me earlier -- just before Alex had shown up with their thug friends -- that Alex had threatened him, telling him to stay away from me. I'm smiling now, just thinking about it. I must mean something to her if she did that. Then how can she just leave?!
"Marissa." I spin around and find myself in her arms. "I can't just leave like this." She reaches up and strokes my cheek. I look into her bright blue eyes and notice the tears behind them. "I love you," she whispers. "I love you and I want to be the one...you want to be with."
"I..."
"I know you don't feel the same way," she interrupts me, choking back sobs. "But I just wanted you to know."
I look into her eyes and brush her tears away. I pull her close to me and feel her head resting on my shoulder. I run my hands slowly up and down her back. She feels so soft against me. I realize our normal roles are reversed. She's usually the one holding me. She's usually the strong one. She's given me everything I need: a home, a lover, and...well, great sex, but that's beside the point. Do I love her? I know I want to be with her but...do I love her?
"Alex..." She looks up at me and I smile. "Stay." I lean in and capture her lips in a heated kiss. She moves her hands down to my waist and pulls me as close as possible. I gladly melt against her. It feels nice to be here again, in the safest place I know.
"Alex," I murmur. "I don't..." -- kiss -- "...know if I..." -- kiss -- "...love you." We finally break apart and I just look into those shining blue pools. "I don't know if I love you," I tell her. "But I do know that I care about you. Forget what I said earlier about thinking we wouldn't work. I know that I want to make this work, that I want to love you so...stay. Please." I reach out and stroke her hair back behind her ear. "I know if you leave...I'll always regret making that happen."
"I'll stay," she agrees. "But you have to mean it, Riss." I nod. She sighs. "I don't know if I can take the lies again. Yeah, I know I should've believed you when you said that you and Ryan were just friends but..."
I cut her off by placing my index finger on her lips. "Hey, hey, hey. Stop. Clean slate, okay? We're starting over now." I move my finger and kiss her. "Babe..."
"Mm...Riss..."
"Take me home," I whisper against her lips.
"Your wish is my command..." She breaks the kiss and starts pulling me toward the parking lot. She stops abruptly in front of her Jeep. "What about your car?"
"What about it? It's still at home, remember? Ryan drove me here."
"Oh." Whoops! Probably shouldn't have said that. I gently squeeze her hand.
"I want you," I remind her firmly. "I don't want Ryan anymore. I haven't for a long time. I'm coming home to sleep in your bed, okay?" She nods and offers me a small smile that I know is supposed to calm me down but really just freaks me out.
"Our bed," she corrects me. She kisses me softly. "We're unsteady," she states.
"We are," I agree. "Starting over is gonna be hard for us." Especially since we went so far so quickly.
"Yeah," she says. "But it'll be worth it. Right?" I nod and rub my nose against hers.
"Come on. Let's go home." She opens the passenger door for me.
"Thank you, kind sir," I tease her. She just grins as I slide inside. She gets into the driver's seat and leans in close.
"Anything for my girl," she whispers. I smile and kiss her nose, both of her cheeks, and finally claim her lips. She kisses me as softly and passionlessly as she can. It's hard, like I mentioned before, but we'll get through it. She moves away and starts the car, beginning the short trek back to our apartment.
As Alex drives back to the apartment, her right hand remaining on the gear shift the entire time, I slowly move my hand over to cover hers. She glances at me and smiles. She spreads her fingers apart I interlace mine with hers. It's going to take a lot of time and effort from both of us, but somehow I know we'll make this work. All I have to is look at her to assure myself that I want her.
"I love you," she whispers, wrapping her arm around me and yanking me into the driver's seat beside her. I rest my head on her shoulder and put my arms around her waist. I think I love her. I really do but...will it stick?
"Alex," I say softly.
"Hm?"
"Nothing," I say. "I just wanted to say your name."
"Okay, sweetie," Alex whispers. She pulls into one of our parking spots and turns off the car. Funny, I didn't even notice we were so close to home. She glances over at me as I lean my head against her shoulder. I meet her eyes briefly and give her a quick flash of a smile.
"Promise you won't leave?" I ask. She kisses the top of my head and puts her arms around my waist.
"Yeah. I promise."
The End.