A/N: I found this piece that I wrote back in 2016 - probably shortly after we were introduced to the Vinsmokes? - and debated with myself about posting this because I wasn't sure if anyone besides Namibean and myself would find it funny. Finally figured I'd just go for it so I made some minor edits and... Here it is. I hope the ending makes you chuckle at least a little ^^
ORANGE
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Nami pulled nervously at her skirt. Under normal circumstances, meeting your significant other's family would already be a bit unsettling, she thought. But when your boyfriend's family turns out to be actual royalty, and a sort of scientific mafia on top of that, it was… It was Meeting the Family. Capital M, capital F.
Sanji, looking calmly determined, rapped sharply on the door and waited a second before opening it. He placed a hand on her back and gently drew her along with him as he walked into the room.
Nami held her head up high, though she was feeling far from confident at the moment. It was stupid, though. And silly. The Straw Hats had come out on top in the fight to get Sanji back from said royal mafia family, so what did she have to be nervous about?
Vinsmoke Judge sat on a grand-looking chair in the middle of the room. He looked huge. It was a wonder Sanji and his siblings were even faintly normal-sized with a father like that. He was flanked by Sanji's siblings – Reiju and Yonji on his right, Ichiji and Niji on his left.
She heard Sanji exchange terse greetings, but didn't pay it much attention. She was much more fascinated by the myriad hair colours in his family. Previously, she had seen them under chaotic circumstances and there had been little opportunity to reflect on physical attributes. But she had a chance to do that now and she took it.
Judge had… Blond hair? It was hard to tell since he had a helmet on. Or was that stuff coming out of the helmet his hair? Or was that just helmet décor? Maybe he had no hair at all. That seemed likely.
Nami wondered if the Vinsmoke children had chosen their titles because of their hair colour – otherwise the coincidence was too uncanny. Poison Pink had pink hair, Winch Green had green hair, Sparking Red was red-haired and Electric Blue was… Well, blue-haired. It was rather comical, but also strange. She'd been imagining Sanji's family as being all blond so having this veritable rainbow before her was surprising and a little unsettling.
"So this is she."
"Yes."
Nami snapped back to the present, realising that they were talking about her.
"The Straw Hat's navigator girl," said his father, looking at her keenly.
Niji and Yonji snickered for some reason. She shot them a look. Niji leered at her. Okay, she definitely didn't like that one. Would it be impolitic of her to extend her Climatact and generate some lightning right over his head right there and then? Probably.
"I am," she said, hoping that her voice wasn't shaking. She didn't know what else to say beyond that. Regular niceties like "It's a pleasure to meet you" just didn't suit the mood. (Nor was it true.)
"Hmm." The old man regarded her with a hard, thoughtful expression.
Sanji wrapped his arm around her waist in a comforting and protective gesture. "She's one of the greatest navigators there is! The Pirate King only has the best on his crew."
She cast him a grateful look. But Sanji didn't see it. He had his eyes fixed on his father, as if daring him to say more.
"Let's be clear." Sanji squared his shoulders. "I am not asking for your permission. It merely seems to me that given the circumstances, I might as well make it clear to you."
Nami caught Reiju's eye then. Reiju smiled. Nami felt a little reassured and smiled back.
"What are you talking about?" said Judge.
"I believe," said Ichiji in a bored tone, "that he means to tell us that he won't be a part of any other 'ridiculous' plans father might have in the future, least of all plans to do with marrying random women. Because of this woman right here."
Nami felt Sanji tense up beside her.
Vinsmoke Judge tilted his head to one side. "Is that so?"
"Yes."
Her heart gave a wobbly leap in her chest. Wait wait wait. Is he basically saying he… Wants to marry me?
"Well." Judge looked her up and down and then at his other children. Then his gaze returned to Sanji. "Your choice is a good one."
"Huh?" Sanji sounded startled and puzzled.
Nami was just as surprised by it. That was unexpected.
"Look around you." He gestured round the room– Reiju brushed several pink locks over her shoulder, Ichiji tossed his red hair, Niji fiddled with the ends of his tremendously long blue bangs, Yonji smoothed his green hair back – then looked pointedly at Sanji, and equally pointedly at Nami's head. "We could use an orange."
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THE END
xD
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Side note: I may be slowly porting my fics over to AO3. I prefer FFN's review system and their search functions, but at times I get tired of not being able to access FFN on mobile except through the app (in which the PM inbox apparently does not sync) as a result of my country's having blocked FFN. (I only manage to access it on the computer by changing DNS settings, which I can't do on my phone.) So when I get some time, I may begin a shift over to AO3...