Note: After seeing the promotional spot of the third season's finale ... I couldn't get that scene out of my mind, so I wrote it down. Notice also, that I saw NO sneak peek before writting that!

*English is a second language to me, so please forgive all the silly mistakes I might have made.

"Castle, they killed my mother."

"They'll kill you Kate" He simply said. His tone was as serious as a heart attack.

Kate Beckett knew he was right, but she wasn't afraid to die to their hands. Any other killers, she might have reconsider, but them ... they were the reason she'd gotten that far, why she pushed it so hard to become as good as a cop can be. If she was to die tonight, the only regret she'd have was not having shot them first.

When Richard Castle read her determination in her lack of response to that, he went on: "You crawled in your mother's murder, and they didn't come out, but you're getting too close, this time they will, they'll track you down"

"Are you done?"

"You do know what you're getting yourself into, right?"

"I think you just brief me on that, thank you."

She was mad. She was biting his head off. Maybe. But she would not stand down, no matter what he'd say, they both knew it. She just couldn't stand down. Whether, he disagreed or not, she truly didn't care.

"I can't let you go out there alone"

"Castle, you're not following me around, not this time."

"The hell, I'm not! You may not realise it, but you need me now, more than you ever have before."

"I don't need you Castle, I never have!"

"That's a lie." He strongly denied.

To her, it wasn't. He came to her, from the very beginning of their little partnership, he got assigned to her, and she never asked nor needed a partner. Sure, she found him very useful in times, but it was like a plus, a cherry on a cake, a very interesting asset, but he wasn't needed! And she certainly didn't need him around.

"It's over, Castle. We are over!"

She was upset, she wasn't meaning those words. At least, that's what he tried to convince himself with. He looked up at her angry eyes, and he could not believe what he was reading there.

"You're not getting rid of me, I know what you're up to; I'm not going away!"

He was bluffing. He truly hoped that she was trying to drive him away, she could have all the reasons she wanted; caring, duty, love, protection, what so ever, but it would make sense. After all that they've been through, it would just be legitimate.

She sighed loudly and looked away. She even smiled, a pissed smile. She lifted a hand to her mouth and nodded. Beckett made a half turn before turning away to add:

"After three years, Castle, have you ever wondered?" She paused. "Haven't it ever occurred to you why I've never let you in?"

He didn't have anything to say. He felt his heart beating faster; were they really having this conversation? For once, he knew that this time he'd better shut the hell up.

"Three years! I'm not blind Castle and you're everything but subtle."

"Don't!"

He knew exactly where she was going with that. He didn't want to hear it. He couldn't hear those words from her. His head spontaneous started to slowly nod negatively.

"... God knows you've tried, Castle, but the truth is ..."

"Kate, don't!"

"... I don't love you!"

He felt life abandoned ship, exiting his body; he felt empty. They were over. His world started spinning.

"Now, get out of here!" She said coldly, getting back her attention to her mother's case in the room.

He felt his emotions gathering in his chest, forming some kind of cancer and killing him slowly, pressing against his heart. Tearing it apart, ripping it pieces by pieces.

Beckett saw the knife-effect her words had on him. She could tell, the man had died, there, in front of her. She also saw his expression change, he became angry, frustrated. She needed him to be mad at her, she deserved it. She turned back and said:

"And I swear to god, Castle, you try anything stupid and I'll shoot you myself!"

He barely looked at her and walked out of her apartment, slamming the door shut.

Beckett felt awful, his stare haunted her memory. Her eyes filled up with tears; her defences lowered now that he was gone. She had succeeded into turning him down. She had to. She had to hold on to that. She needed him out of there, away from her, so he wouldn't get hurt. He had seen right through her; she did try to get rid of him ... for his protection. She couldn't stand the thought of losing him. The irony was that she had to hurt him herself, she did have to lose him after all. But if she knew he was alive, even mad as hell at her, it would've been worst it. Even though, she fairly understood that, the pain she felt inside her wasn't fading away.

"I don't love you" she echoed herself. "Richard Castle, I don't love you, I don't ... love you" She repeated it again and again hoping to convince herself. "I am not in love with you, I ... I ... love you ... not." She inhaled deeply and sobbed while exhaling. She hid her face within her palms, got down to the floor and cried her heart out.