Title: These Apples Are Delicious
Ship: Ella/Grey
Rating: M
Description: One shot in the WHW series, the timeline somewhere between the final chapter and epilogue of Peer Pressure. Ella and Grey are still in college but some time has elapsed since they first started dating. In fact, they've broken up; and neither one is very accepting of that fact in all respects.
Ella Dugrey opened her front door, relieved to see that the doorknob was devoid of the delivery menu from the now defunct sub shop in town. It was the signal that she and her roommate had devised to wordlessly signal to the other that the apartment was in use as a romantic hideaway. Ella was relieved that Rosa had not posted a sign of the apartment being occupied in a manner that meant she was to turn around and trudge back out into the snow and hole up at the coffee house on the corner, or worse head all the way back onto campus to a library. It had been a long day, and while she was happy for Rosa that she and Pax had recently reunited, again, it had resulted in rendering their residence a veritable no-trespassing zone on a far too-frequent basis in the last couple of weeks. Ella needed the comfort of her own couch and the freedom of musical choice as she studied, as opposed to listening to whatever jilted co-ed felt the need to express themselves 'artistically' in the form of a sad song about their last breakup for any poor soul who had happened into the coffee house to hear.
Ella had personally had enough of breakups, not to mention ill-advised reunions, of late, be it her roommate's or her own. She kicked the door shut due to her full arms; thanks to a stack of books and a barely grasped cup of coffee—now lukewarm at best—which she'd taken on the run as a rather weepy-looking girl who had obviously just dyed her hair black had begun whimpering into the microphone and strumming her guitar to make sure it had been properly tuned. As if that would help her song, Ella had thought as she made her escape.
After safely setting her coffee on the dining table and dumping her books unceremoniously on the nearest dining chair, she pulled out her phone and turned it on speakerphone as she activated on her voicemail. She busied herself with taking off her coat, which was slightly damp at the shoulders from the light snow that had melted on her way up from the front door of the building.
She sat on an empty chair and pulled off her warm boots as she heard her brother remind her that their parents would be arriving next week for Christmas and he expected to find shelter with her, or else he was giving her Christmas present to some random homeless person on the street. She rolled her eyes and waited for the beep. Next, of course, was her mother, reminding her that they'd be up, as if she could forget, giving her an exact timeline of what Rory had planned, and a none-too-subtle reassurance that they could always swing by Yale on the way and pick her up, if she wanted to stay in Stars Hollow. It was almost tempting, to be with the family, but she'd declined as it was such a short drive and she had a perfectly good apartment to herself, as Rosa would be joining her family for a ski trip in Aspen, as they did every other year. The odd years were spent in the Florida Keys. She'd gone along last year, but now she only had an invitation to her family's yearly pilgrimage to Stars Hollow, Connecticut.
No, a little solitude suited her just fine. After breaking up with Grey Langley—who as Rosa's brother would also be heading to Aspen after finals—just as summer vacation began, she had needed to be alone. It had been difficult to manage, as his sister was her best friend and as a rule they all tended to hang out as a group; Rosa, Grey, Paxton Huntzberger, Jasper Wellington, and Ella, just one big happy pack. No matter what had gone down between individual members, they'd attempted to not let it affect the group dynamic. It had been too much togetherness as she was attempting to put some space between herself and Grey. She had struggled with the decision to end things; and in fact since they split, she'd given into doubt one too many times by allowing them to act in more than friendly terms. He never pressed for them to get back together, but after each encounter she vowed that she'd never let it happen again. It had been two months since their last set-back, and with Christmas coming, she felt it was best that he was traveling across the country from her. She needed to start the new year without him. She needed to move on.
The voicemail double beeped, signaling that there were no further messages. With a sigh, she ended the call and headed into her room to change into a much more comfortable outfit than the form-fitting dark jeans and new sweater she'd picked up on her last shopping trip with her mother in New York. It was snowing, and as she'd already walked in the snow, as was tradition in their family, she was ready to hunker down and enjoy watching it from the warmth of her home, in a pair of flannel pants and a Yale t-shirt. She was just slipping her feet into a pair of slippers when she heard someone knocking at the door.
"Just a second," she called as she made her way to the front of the apartment once again, pausing briefly to peek out the peephole. She paused, with her hand on the knob, knowing she had to open the door as she'd already made her presence known. The visitor was most likely there to pay a call to her roommate, and would certainly only stay long enough to find out that Rosa had yet to return.
Ella unlocked the door and pulled it open, now face-to-face with Greyson Langley. His brown hair was shorter than he normally wore it, the result of a very recent trim. His black coat complimented his broad shoulders and his messenger bag was slung across his torso. His nose was slightly pink, as hers had been minutes before, from the wind that was picking up with the snow outside. He'd barely have time to warm up before returning to the chill, she thought.
"Why didn't you use your key?" she asked.
"That's for emergencies," he answered, not put off by her lack of greeting.
"The last time you used it, you let yourself into my room and got into my bed with me at three in the morning."
He smiled, his eyes giving away the fact that he remembered the occasion she was referring to with great detail. "That was an emergency."
She scoffed. "You were drunk."
"I'm not allowed to think about you when I'm drunk?" he asked.
She crossed her arms. "I can't control what you think about, whether you're drunk or sober."
"You also didn't kick me out of bed. I wasn't that drunk—I remember the events of that night with a high level of recall."
She blushed at his confirmation. "Rosa's not here."
He stamped his feet on the mat in the hall to loosen the remainder of snow that had packed in the treads of his shoes as he walked outside. "I know. She and Pax are at our place. Jasper followed our waitress home from dinner, and I came here."
"You want to crash in Rosa's room?" she asked.
"You act like I'm a bad guest. I have manners," he said as he reached into his bag and pulled out an apple. He held it out, waiting for her to take it.
"You brought me an apple?" she asked, skeptical of what on earth had prompted such an offering.
"That apple is delicious," he said with the highest level of confidence. "It's a honeycrisp. They're like candy. You love candy."
"Yes, but I'm not the biggest apple eater," she made a face as she held it in her palm, between them.
"It seemed appropriate," he admitted with a sheepish look on his face.
"What? Oh, no. No, no, no. You promised, no more."
He gave her his most pleading face. It was her second favorite expression he demonstrated in her presence, topped only by the intense and almost tortured way he looked at her just before they kissed. She was not letting anything happen tonight, she reminded herself, and to make certain of that, he would not be staying the night; not even in the room across the hall.
"Come on! It's my final paper, and if I don't get at least a B, I'll fail."
"You had no business taking Russian again the first place!" she exclaimed, feeling like she was scolding a puppy.
"I didn't! It's French."
Ella cocked her head and made a disgruntled noise. "Can't you just stick to English? You seem to have a pretty firm grasp on that already. And what about Spanish? You can at least make your way around Cabo for four days on the few phrases you can manage to recall in Spanish."
"I don't think knowing how to order beer, ask for the bathroom, and assure the police that the woman I'm with isn't a prostitute speaks of a mastery of the language. Besides, French is so lyrical and the people are so rude. I love the dichotomy of it all. I mean, where else can women eat that much cheese and still look like supermodels?"
Ella blinked at him. "I think you need to go."
"I promise to take a language you have yet to master next semester. Which ones don't you speak again?" he teased and complimented her all at once.
She rolled her eyes and stepped back. "Fine, come in. But you aren't sleeping here."
He tossed his bag by the couch and went to start unbuttoning his coat. "You wouldn't toss me out in the cold. It's supposed to snow six inches by morning," he informed her.
"So go home before it gets bad. You do have a home. I've seen it. It's plenty capable of keeping you safe from the storm."
"I'm sorry, did you miss the part about my sister being there with Pax? There is not enough therapy in the world for me to listen to them all night."
Ella sighed. "What's your paper about?"
He grinned, having won the battle if not the war, and she retreated to put the apple on the kitchen counter.
"Hey, do you have any hot chocolate?"
She turned to see him coming into the kitchen behind her. She leaned back against the lower cabinets. "I agreed to help you conjugate verbs, not make you refreshments."
"I'm cold," he informed her. "I study better when I'm warm."
She felt plenty warm, and she blamed the way he was looking at her; not to mention the fact the way she couldn't help but watch him. He was only a foot away, and she could practically feel her body's tendency to gravitate toward him. She turned quickly and started rifling through a cabinet. "I think we have some, somewhere. Rosa bought a ton of it a few weeks ago. She was so sure we were going to get an early snow. I tried telling her," she said her words quickly.
"You are the snow expert," he agreed, stepping closer to her to reach around her body to access the higher shelf. His chest lightly braced her back and his arm brushed hers on its way to retrieve the mix.
"Tell that to Rosa," she managed, finding it harder to speak.
His eyes wandered across her face as he stepped back just far enough to allow her to turn back to face him. "Clearly Rosa doesn't know everything. Look at her and Pax."
Ella reached back to rest her hands on the counter behind her. "They'll figure it out one day. Anyone can see they're meant to be together in the long run."
"And what do people see when they look at us?" he inquired seriously, not relenting in proximity.
"Grey, we've talked about this," she said, though her voice wasn't as strong and resolute as she might have hoped.
"We have. That doesn't stop us from not talking sometimes," he said, leaning just a little closer. With the slightest advance he'd be a breath away. His eyes were on her mouth, no longer on her confused blue eyes.
"I thought you needed help with your French," she offered lamely.
"I wanted a warm place to stay. You were the first thing that came to my mind," he admitted. "You were the only thing that came to mind."
"Grey," she said, her tone pleading. "I'm not a port in a storm."
"No, but you can get me warm in a hurry," he said, his hand now against her cheek, two fingers brushing her skin with just enough pressure to make her choke back a pleased sigh.
"So can the hot chocolate," she retorted, starting to wane in resolution.
"You taste better."
Her mouth opened slightly, his words silencing her attempt to dissuade him. He took the opportunity to kiss her. It wasn't a testing of the waters kind of kiss—he dove right into the deep end. Her hands came up his neck, feeling his newly shortened hair at her fingertips before sliding down the muscles on the back of his neck. His hands moved to her waist, gripping her hips and lifting her easily up to sit her on the countertop. His teeth grazed her bottom lip and she whimpered in both pleasure and frustration.
"You don't really want to kick me out in the snow, do you?" he asked as his hands found the hem of her shirt.
"We can't keep doing this," she sighed as she felt his hands slide up her stomach. He surprised her by rounding her body and sliding up her back, holding her closer to him from underneath her shirt. Her legs were parted to allow his torso to nestle against hers and out of habit she'd wrapped her legs around his waist. "We broke up."
"How's that working out for you?" he asked, in the next moment kissing just below her earlobe. She arched her head to give him better access. He wasn't playing fair—her answers were much more rational when he wasn't igniting all her pleasure points.
"You know why we didn't work," she said, not to cast blame, but hopefully to give him pause. She could form a better argument if he would just give her a minute without touching her.
He stroked her back with his hands, up and down, in a hypnotic manner. "I was an idiot."
"I don't disagree," she said with an arched brow, though the urge to lean in and kiss him was still strong. "But it doesn't change the fact that you're not ready to be in a relationship," she said, being as strong as she could while practically welded to him.
"Can you blame me for missing you?" he asked, his eyes honest and clear. "I never claimed to be worthy of you. I don't want to think about you all the time. It just gets too damn hard to think about you and not touch you."
"Shit," she closed her eyes, overwhelmed and aching. She needed to put a stop to this, there and now. If she told him to go, he'd leave. She wouldn't have to worry about him; he wasn't without options. It was the wisest choice, to widen the divide between them. Letting him stay wouldn't resolve their issues or help them move on. "I hate that you do this to me."
He kissed her softly, his lips repentant as he coaxed a response from her. His thumbs rubbed slow circles, down her back until he got to her waistband. His hands slipped down under the soft fabric and cupped her bottom. "What exactly do I do to you?"
"You aren't even taking French, are you?" she asked.
"Oui," he responded. "I thought the next time we went to Paris, I could impress you with my bad grammar and convincing accent," he suggested, without a hint of levity.
"You don't want to go to Paris with me," she said softly.
"I want to go everywhere with you," he sighed into her, kissing her again. "Besides, we had fun last time."
"We did. It was after we got back that wasn't so fun," she remembered.
"I shouldn't have taken that girl's number. I threw it away," he assured her.
She shook her head. It had been the last in a list of things that had convinced her he wasn't ready to be in a long-term relationship, no matter how attracted they were to each other. "It doesn't matter. You can do whatever you want now."
"But now all I want is you," he groaned in frustration. "I've realized the error of my ways. I'm not saying you have to take me back, but at least understand that you're the only woman that I need a number for! The only one I can't get out of my mind. I want to take you to Paris, and Milan, and anywhere else you want to go. You can tell me to go to hell, but that won't make me want you any less."
"Where was this six months ago?" she asked, furious with him for making this kind of declaration now, after she'd spent so much time trying to convince herself that she'd done the right thing by ending things.
"Forget six months ago. Think about now. What do you want from me right now? Do you want me to leave?" he demanded.
She bit her lip. She could still taste him. "No."
He touched his forehead to hers, his eyes hopeful. "Do you want me to sleep in Rosa's room?"
Her eyes closed softly. Her breath hitched, and she envisioned trying to sleep alone after touching him like this. "We're just talking about tonight?"
He licked his lips as she opened her eyes. "I'll take what I can get."
"You can stay. Just for tonight."
He smiled, not out of triumph, but out of genuine happiness. He lifted her off the counter and kissed her as they left the kitchen, sans hot chocolate. She giggled as he carried her through the apartment. "You can put me down," she instructed.
"I'm not letting you go. You might change your mind," he said with a great level of confidence. He did know her, after all. She was prone to rationality in a way that almost never worked out in his favor. Not that he was so detached from reality, but when it came to her, often wanted more than he was ready to deal with. But one night he could handle. It was her that would have the difficulty, she thought.
"What about your paper?" she asked, as he stepped into her room.
"I would rather be with you than pass French," he assured her as he kissed her neck. She wrapped her arms around him tighter, just as he laid her back on the bed. He kept hold of her as they shifted to the horizontal plane of her mattress. "I'd stay here over break instead of heading to Aspen if you'd let me," he admitted.
"You can't. My family's coming up and Jake's staying with me," she was glad for the line to draw, even though he was tracing his own lines on her skin as his hand skimmed up to raise her t-shirt.
"Anyone else staying?" he asked, kissing her bare stomach.
Her eyes fluttered shut and she willed herself to remain detached. It would be one thing to enjoy this hiccup, but to lose herself in him was another matter altogether. She ran a hand down his cheek. She missed getting lost in him. "No."
He seemed to get the answer he was wanted, as he kissed up to where the fabric still covered her chest and pushed it out of his way. She gasped as his mouth warmed her skin on initial contact, his tongue running in heated circles around its target. It didn't seem quite fair, that they could be this good together and still remain apart. That was the hardest part about falling in love with Grey; her decision for them to split was best for both of them, even though it wasn't what either of them wanted. She wanted to believe that his insistence tonight was a sign of his needs, not just his wants.
Her hands found his and they interlaced fingers, him pressing hers down at their sides. He moved across her chest, using his teeth to move the remainder of clothing that was in his way, as his hands remained locked with hers. She felt a heat that he'd ignited spread at the action, and course through her as he opened his mouth against her skin again.
His tongue on her sensitive skin resulted in her breath being forced out in short, shallow rasps. He'd always been attentive to her, but that evening he had a focus and voraciousness as he worked her up, like a man being served his last meal. Apparently he'd taken her at her word—that they'd have to stop doing this. His lips came back against hers, and she parted them as he kissed the corner of her mouth. "What are you doing to me?" she asked.
"Anything you want," he answered, taking her hand with him as he slipped down the front of her lounge pants. "I'll figure out a way someday to change your mind. In the meantime, you just wanted to focus on tonight, remember?"
She pulled her bottom lip into her teeth, releasing it slowly as both of their fingers brushed over her panties. It might have been well below freezing outside, as the snow piled up on the ground, but in her bedroom on the third floor, it was unbearably hot. With flannel sheets against her back and Grey over her, she was well past overheated. His lips grazed her breast again, as he let go of her hand and slipped under the edge of her underwear and swept his thumb up over the apex of her body. Her whole body shuddered at the stimulation and she turned into him.
"You don't miss this?" he whispered against her, his breath tickling her skin. His thumb stroked her again, and she let out a whimper in response. "Ella?"
"Yes," she managed as he dragged his thumb down, moving with increased speed as he gained moisture from her warm, wet form. Once again, he stroked up, easing the friction and increasing the pressure. "But we shouldn't."
"Why not? I love you," he vowed as he slid two fingers inside of her while keeping the motion of his thumb steady.
"Don't stop," she instructed as her body tightened around his hand.
"I won't," he said with a double meaning, moving his lips down to her breast once again, intensifying her reaction. If he was attempting to prove a point, he was certainly driving it home. She let herself get lost after all, as her head sank into the pillow behind her and he kept up the rhythm he'd established, inside her, against her; he'd overtaken her. He continued, slowing only after she had begun to shiver a little, signs of aftershocks of the intensity of the pleasure he'd provided. He kissed between her breasts, then higher on her chest, her chin, and finally her lips. He rested the palm of his hand over her, resting between the cloth of her underwear and just her, keeping the heat trapped against her skin. "I can stay."
"Tonight?" she asked, meeting his eyes dead on as she felt her chest rise and fall.
"I could stay longer," he offered. "I can. I can be here, for you."
She knew he was being honest—possibly more honest than he'd ever been. She'd certainly never seen him like this. Grey was self-assured, but he was also fairly open with his faults. He'd told her that this wouldn't be an easy thing for him, to be in a relationship. And he'd been good at it until he just wasn't. There had been frayed edges. Not major hurts, but minor injuries that lingered in her mind. He didn't want to admit it, because he did love her. She had to be the one to end things. "I'm not sure I can. Tonight's all I can promise for now. You should go to Aspen. I shouldn't be a reason you're not with your family. Not right now."
His couldn't disguise the melancholy in his eyes. She reached out and held his cheek as she kissed him. "If there is ever going to be a time when we work, I want it to last. I can't lose you again, and if we rush it, I'm afraid that will happen. Does that make sense?"
"Until then, I'm on my own, huh?" he gave her a smile, though his sadness seeped through still.
She tilted her head back and forth, in a sideways nod. "After tonight. I'm all yours tonight."
He barely moved his head as he nodded in agreement. "What about being my language tutor?"
She laughed, her merriment filling the room. "Like I have a choice?"
"I'm always going to need you," he assured her, brushing his thumb now across the smooth of her cheek. "No matter what happens."
She could feel tears welling up at his words. She wasn't used to him being so forthcoming about his feelings for her. These last few months, while she knew they were both still attracted to one another, they'd been so awkward and stiff with one another. She supposed they'd go back to that new normal where nothing felt quite right tomorrow. Tonight she felt so natural and connected with him; almost enough to make her want to take his words and run.
"Hey, Ella, don't cry," he soothed, repositioning himself to slide under her as he wrapped both arms around her. "If you don't stop, I'll start talking to distract you, then I'll end up rambling and you'll end up smacking me."
"Some things never change," she sniffed with a smile. "Sorry. I wasn't expecting an emotional rollercoaster."
"Neither was I," he agreed. "But ever since I met you, nothing's been quite what I expected. When I told my parents we split, I figured that my dad would roll his eyes and my mom would yell at me for losing a girl like you. You know what happened?"
Ella shook her head. She assumed they knew by now, but Rosa had never mentioned her parents' reaction to the news. Rosa herself had been supportive of Ella, while checking in on her brother in his time of need. Ella suspected she'd set Pax and Jasper with a best course of action and forced them to watch over their friend.
"Mom just looked at me, with this look of pity. She's never looked at me like that before. As if I could pretend for a moment that I hadn't lost the best thing that had ever happened to me, that sealed it. Dad took me drinking."
Ella smiled. "Mom made me eat ice cream from a tub then took me shoe shopping in the city. Then we went to Serendipity. Dad asked if you needed to be roughed up."
Grey smiled. "What about Jake?"
"Please. It's Jake," she rolled her eyes.
Grey smiled. "I can go, if it's better. Or at least sleep in Rosa's room."
"No," she grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him against her. "It's warm in here, and it's like we're snowed in, all secluded from the world. I think I needed this; to know even though we're not together, that maybe it's also not quite over."
"Our other sexual encounters weren't so supportive of that notion?" he smirked.
"Hey, I'm right here if you want another chance at convincing me," she said, her eyes brimming now with hope instead of tears. She hoped that they'd each manage to find their way back to each other when the time was right. She didn't want closure, she wanted an open invitation.
He leaned down and kissed her, slowly and surely, and she rose up to meet him in matched fervor. Her grandmother had always told her how magical snow was, and this seemed to be her proof. She spent this night, a gift of sorts just before the Christmas holiday, with the one thing she had wanted most.
XXXX
The display of the clock read 3:31 as she gained consciousness, having woken to signs of hunger. She glanced at Grey; smiling at his relaxed face next to hers on the pillow. Her fingers itched to trace the line of his jaw, but she didn't want to wake him. Instead she gently lifted his protective arm from her waist and slipped out of bed to find something to tide her over until breakfast.
She pulled her robe around her bare body and quickly stepped into her slippers. The tile in the kitchen would be freezing under her feet. She considered making the hot chocolate that Grey had wanted earlier in the evening, but didn't want to make any noise. She made out the shape of the apple on the counter, and remembered his promise that it tasted like candy. She grabbed it and walked over to the window, pushing back the curtain as she took a bite, to look out over the freshly lain blanket of snow that had fallen in the last few hours. They'd gotten six inches easily, and it was still falling from the sky. She took a bite, her teeth piercing the skin of the fruit and into the juicy, sweet flesh.
"You aren't going to open that window, are you?" Grey's groggy voice asked as he came shuffling out of her room, with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders and hanging down his otherwise naked frame.
"I did entertain the idea briefly," she admitted. She held up the apple and took another bite.
"I told you those apples were delicious," he said, taking a bite as she offered the fruit, holding it for him as he ripped a chunk off with his teeth.
"As a matter of fact, they are," she agreed as she watched him eat.
He chewed thoughtfully and swallowed. "But not as delicious as you."
She put both hands on the apple, turning more of the honey-red skin toward her. "You're going to have to stop talking about me like that, you know."
He sighed as he watched the snow fall, and then he finally met her eyes. "Like what?"
"Like you want to ravish me. Friends don't do what we just did."
"It's too late to be friends with benefits," he nodded. "It's also too late to turn back now. I meant what I said."
"It's one of your more admirable qualities," she smiled at him.
He stood a little straighter with his blanket drawn around his shoulders, like an overgrown child. "I have admirable qualities, huh?"
"A few. Mostly your straightforwardness and your inability to give up. Take your search for a second language you can retain. Most people would accept defeat after the second botched attempt, but not you."
"It's nice that you phrased it so nicely. Rosa just says I'm stubborn and pig-headed."
She laughed at his expression and her best friend's coinage. "You have a nice smile, too."
"If we're going to start complimenting physical attributes, I'm gonna be out here with my feet on this freezing cold floor all night. Might I suggest we just go back to the warm bed and let me show you all the parts of you I enjoy? After all, the sun hasn't come up yet, so it's not tomorrow by a mere technicality."
She finished the apple and tossed the core before following him back toward her bedroom. "It's going to be hard to resist you too long if you keep getting to me on technicalities," she informed him.
He grabbed her hand to pull her back on the bed after she shed her robe. He kissed her and fixed his eyes on hers. "That's the idea."
She pressed her body back against his, generating heat once again, and kissed his shoulder as he ran his hands through her hair. They only had a few hours until the sun came up, as the shortest day of the year drew near. She wasn't going to waste it thinking about his departure of the next time they would see one another. The future would sort itself out. She didn't want to miss a moment of what was happening in there here and now.