Disclaimer: I don't own them. Forgive me, Gene, from your place on high, for getting them a little bit dirty. I promise that they will still function at maximum efficiency.

…

"Can you believe it's him? The Captain Kirk," one waitress said in awe.

"He's so adorable," another commented.

"I bet he's big," the last one added dreamily.

"Yeah, darlin', he's big. Big and taken," a male voice informed as it came from the direction of the restrooms.

"How would you know?" the girl who had spoken demanded before turning to grab another pitcher of water.

"I know," Bones began as he leaned in close over the waitress, speaking into her ear, "because I can still feel him inside me."

The waitress's jaw dropped, and Bones, now satisfied that the restaurant's staff would quit gossiping and fawning all over Jim, headed back to their table.

"What was all that about?" Jim queried when Bones returned.

"Just letting the girls know that they should back the fuck off of my man."

"Mmm," Jim sighed contentedly, "I love it when you're protective." He tossed his lover a soul-searing smile with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"That explains why you flirt so much," Bones complained with a scowl.

"I'm not that bad."

"Jim, you have half the restaurant talking about the size of your phaser, and I don't mean the one on your utility belt."

"Let them be curious, Bones, that's only for you to know."

"You better be glad I know you love me."

"What would I do without you? I'd have no one to jab me with hyposprays."

"I thought you hate it when I do that."

"I'm referring in particular to the one attached to you. You know, the one labeled 'ecstasy'."

"God damn it, Jim! Do you have to do this to me in public?"

"What, Bones? Am I turning you on?" Jim whispered as he trailed his fingers up Bone's thigh under the table.

"How long does it take these people to bring the damn check?"

"I'll take that as a yes," Jim purred, "Don't worry, love, our waitress is coming now."

"It's about damn time," Bones mumbled.

…

"I'll get us back to the hotel soon," Jim promised on the way out to the hover car.

"Yeah, if you don't kill us with your driving."

"We'll live, and I'll only be using my left hand."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Bones, buckle up."

"Jim—" Bones began but stopped with a long gasp.

The bold captain had deftly unbuttoned Bones's pants and pulled down his fly. He now had Bones by the hypospray. "I couldn't help but notice that you needed a hand. I just so happened to have an extra one."

"Jim, this is a rental!"

"There won't be any evidence."

"How are you gonna manage that while driving?"

"You're going to put your nimble surgeon's fingers to use keeping us alive while I swallow."

"Remind me again while I fell in love with an idiot?"

"My hot body."

"Oh, yeah."

"And I'm an expert on sexual anatomy. Plus, I'm a hell of a lot more exciting than a medical journal."

"I. Have. To. Agree." Bones got out between moans.

"I mean, a medical journal can't do this," Jim said as he demonstrated his point by rubbing his finger along Bones's slit and massaging the liquid he discovered there onto the rest of Bone's engorged shaft. He earned an appreciative whimper followed by some very sexy panting.

"Jim!" Bones grabbed the steering wheel desperately.

Jim grinned, understanding the message. He ducked under Bones's outstretched arm to replace his hand with his mouth. He swirled his tongue from Bones's tip to base and back again only once before his lover came into his waiting mouth with force.

He took the wheel again, licking his lips and heaving a contented sigh. "Have I ever told you how wonderful you taste?"

"Several times," Bones replied. His normal growl was now a stated drawl.

"It must be because you're Georgian."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"The peaches. Look! We're back and alive!"

"You're a miracle."

"You're not the first to notice," Jim replied cheekily.

On the way inside, they ran into Spock and Uhura venturing out.

"Good evening, Nyota, Spock," Bones greeted cheerfully as he stepped back from the elevator to allow them out.

"Hey guys!" Jim exclaimed with his natural excitement.

"Jim; Doctor." "Good evening Bones; Jim." Spock and Uhura answered simultaneously.

"Have fun with whatever you're doing!" Jim supplied, "How about lunch tomorrow?"

"That would be agreeable. Nyota?"

"I'll set something up," Uhura assured as the elevator door closed to take their shipmates up.

"I don't think I've ever seen McCoy so happy," she commented, perplexed, to Spock.

"I believe that would be due to the captain recently performing what you would call a 'blow job' on the doctor," Spock clarified sagely.

Uhura's jaw dropped for a moment. "How long have you known about that?" she demanded.

"For quite some time. When Jim considers you a close friend, he tends to open up, if it were believable that he could open up any more. I became aware directly after Jim told me 'Spock, I need a new best friend since I started fucking the old one, and I think you're the perfect person for the job.'"

"I think he's a bad influence on you."

"I can not argue with that. However, the captain is like a puppy. It is very difficult to tell him no."

Uhura laughed melodically. "But it's not impossible."

"I believe the doctor is a good example of both points."

…

"That's not a very gentlemanly thing to say!" Jim jokingly protested.

"You're not a lady, so it doesn't really matter now does it?" Bones replied with a suggestive wink.

"You better not be playing a tease," Jim said as he pushed Bones against the elevator wall. He kissed him roughly.

"Yeah, well, having sex in an elevator isn't proper decorum for two high ranking Starfleet officers such as ourselves.

"Just as long as you hold up your end in the bedroom, I won't complain."

"We'll flip a coin for that," Bones said saucily.

"I outrank you," Jim shot back.

"Do you want me to put you off duty for a bad case of blue balls?"

"Bones!"

"I didn't think so."

"You wouldn't do that to me," he pouted.

"No, I wouldn't," Bones said softly, "unless I was really angry." He kissed Jim tenderly before noting, "This is our floor."

"At last."

…

Jim slipped his ankles onto Bones's shoulders as he built a rhythm between their bodies. As he relaxed, Jim became more playful. He pulled Bones down for a few intense kisses and trailed his fingers along the older man's angular contours. He clenched his muscles around his lover's jutting erection, relishing the fact that no other man who had truly loved him had ever managed to hit his prostate with every thrust.

Falling into a satisfied pile of limbs, Jim decided for the hundredth time that "Yeah. Bones is a keeper."

After a moment of recovery, they untangled themselves into a more organized, spooning position. Jim kissed Bones's shoulders and neck before reaching back to rummage through his pants pocket. He, and his arm, returned shortly. Jim took Bones's left hand and began sliding the anonymous band of metal off his finger.

"Jim?"

"Hmmm?"

"You told me to never take this off."

"Unless…"

"Unless you were asking me to marry you."

After Jim wrangled the old token of his affection off Bones, he revealed a box of matching rings.

"Leonard Horatio McCoy, will you make me the happiest man in the universe for the rest of my life and whatever is beyond? Will you be my husband?"

"Jim," Bones whispered. He sounded somewhere in the shock and awe as he turned to face his lover.

Jim saw the question in his eyes and answered, "I've never been more serious in my life."

"Of course I'll be your husband, if you'll be mine."

"There's nothing I want more," Jim whispered. He handed one ring to Bones after he placed the new one on his now nude finger. Bones skimmed the offered piece of jewelry onto Jim's finger and kissed it before taking a slow trail up to his fiancé's lips.