Don't own Naruto.
Thoughts
Quiet. It was very quiet. The kind of quiet that you can meditate in, or sleep in without interruption.
Unless you're awake.
Sasuke was awake in the quiet summer night. He was awake as he gazed down on the blond sleeping peacefully next to him, presumably dreaming – or not dreaming. It didn't really matter to Sasuke. All that mattered was that Naruto was unconscious.
The dark-haired man memorized his lover's face with his eyes, running his hand over the skin on his back. It was soft, seemingly too soft for a man, let alone a shinobi.
Memorizing – committing it to memory. Breathing his scent in, gently brushing his fingertips over his hair. It was so peculiar, the texture. Different – everything about Naruto is different, and perhaps that is partially why Sasuke is so attracted to him.
Different then others, yet the only one who understands him. Does that make Sasuke different?
Sasuke contemplates this as Naruto breathes deeply, in and out. The process is mesmerizing, and Sasuke thinks he could watch him sleep all night. Naruto is so different, he thinks.
Similar, yet different.
Sadness grips him as he realizes just how different they are -
How unworthy he is.
He studies Naruto's face. It is content, he concludes. He is happy, even in deep sleep. Something about his unconscious body tells Sasuke more about Naruto then if he was awake. He is unguarded. Not that Naruto doesn't show emotion – quite the opposite. But it is difficult to see when Naruto is truly, genuinely happy, and when he is pretending to be happy.
Sasuke suspects he is very used to pretending.
What brings Naruto pain, brings Sasuke pain. What brings Naruto joy, brings joy to Sasuke also. They are connected to each other.
But when Naruto is asleep, and it is comfortingly quiet – deathly quiet – Sasuke is left with no one but himself.
Looking down on the soft, warm body next to him, Sasuke wishes he could be different.
He wishes that he could make Naruto happy, just happy, instead of bringing pain with him. He longs to wipe the sadness from his blue eyes as he remembers.
Remembers that time is limited.
Sasuke moves, carefully, so that he does not disturb the man sleeping next to him. Leaning on his arm, he sees Naruto's face clearly in the moonlight.
At some point in his sorry life, apologies were not enough. At some point, fate decides the consequence.
In this case, Naruto was the consequence.
Sasuke glances at the bottle of prescription drugs on the nightstand closest to Naruto. Eventually, fate will win their battle. Naruto was born to win, to strive to excellence, perfecting the dreams of his forefathers – until Sasuke came along.
Naruto continues to breathe deeply in his small, tranquil bit of bliss. How many breaths does he have left? Sasuke wonders. How much longer with I be able to lay here, next to him, to watch him as he sleeps?
Sasuke scoots closer to his dying lover, taking comfort in his overwhelming heat that was all Naruto. He hears him breathing, slowly, strongly. Naruto is different, he thinks. He will survive.
The quiet begins to fade out as he falls asleep to something much, much better then silence.
Fin
Feedback gives me giggles. :3