I do not own the rights to any of the anime characters that I am using in this fanfiction.

If I did, well I'd be a rich man

Kyo: You're an idiot

Me: I'm just stating facts.

Kyo: Like anyone believes that you own anything.

Me: That last statement it hurts me (Points to my heart) Right here.

Kyo: Get on with the story.

Me: But now I'm sad at my poorness 

Kyo: Do it before I kill you.

Me: All right fine.

Cheese fifties documentary music starts playing. And Soujiro is shown walking down the street

Hey you down there

Soujiro looks up with his trademark smile and waves

I bet you're having a good day

He nods

It must be nice to be a Bishonen

Soujiro looks puzzled

(Laughing) A Bishonen means you're an 'attractive' male anime character

Soujiro looks like he's saying oh and nods

That means you probable got several fan-girls and some fan-boys

Soujiro does a sweat drop

Hey looks there's some of your fan girls now (Shows several rabid Soujiro Fan girls) Do you know what those fan girls will do to you if they find you?

Soujiro looks confused and shakes his head

They're going to do something 'improper' to you

Soujiro get an even bigger smile

Not good improper

Soujiro now looks scared

Don't worry they probably won't notice you

Soujiro lets out a sigh of relief

Oh looks like the noticed you

Soujiro's eyes get huge as he sees the fan girl mob coming towards him

Now what should you do?

Soujiro starts running as fast as he can

Good, the first step to getting away from fan girls is running away

Soujiro gives the thumbs up sign

Oh no looks like they really want you (Fan girls are running faster than Soujiro) What now?

Soujiro looks around and spots Kenshin. He runs up and throws the hapless Rurouni into the fan girl mob

Excellent, the second step to getting away from fan girls is to send some other Bishonen in their way. Well that slowed them down. Maybe you should hide

Soujiro nods and goes into a hiding place

Now you should find your love interest in the series and have her help you fend off the fan girls.

Soujiro looks down sadly

So you don't have a love interest?

Soujiro shakes his head 

Don't show angst. Fan girls can sense angst a mile away

Soujiro looks terrified

Well they found you. Perhaps you need to make a love interest to help you.

Soujiro looks confused

Ha ha ha, using the process called OC or Original Character you can make your own girlfriend

Soujiro smiles and starts creating an OC

Oh no the fan girls are here and you haven't finished her. I think you better run.

Soujiro nods and starts off again

There is one other way, you can find someone from another anime and have her 'crossover' to your anime. Do you know of some other single anime girls that might be willing to help?

Soujiro nods

Well you better send her over right now (shows Sailor Mercury running from fan boys) It's because she's wearing a short skirt isn't it?

Soujiro gives a huge smile

Well it looks like she needs some help herself. If you help her maybe she'll help you

Soujiro draws his sword and cuts down the fan boys then he starts beating their dead bodies

Man settled down Soujiro. I think you may need professional help.

Soujiro stops and starts looking at Sailor Mercury and they both start blushing

Oh I think they like each other, but wait the fan girls are coming

Mercury sends a blast of water to knock all the fan girls away

The best way to get rid of fan girls is to have your wife/fiancé/girlfriend defend you, because they don't want anybody laying a hand on their man.

Mercury nods

Well looks like you found love in the end. And you didn't end up like Kenshin

(Shows Kenshin's twitching body)

Soujiro grins and starts to walk off with Mercury

Now you all know how to stay safe from fan girls. Good night and Good luck.

Soujiro: I liked that story

Me: Me too

Soujiro: To bad that you're still poor

Me: 

Kyo: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA loser