Title: iNever

Disclaimer: I own iCarly. Oh, wait. No I don't….

Summary: Sam hears someone break into Carly's apartment at 2AM. Freddie comes over. Hilarity and drinking games occur. A little profanity!

Author's note: This is my very first iCarly fanfiction, and I LOVED writing these two. It's so much fun, but so easy to get out of character, so please rate&review!

SAMS POV

I was laying there, sound asleep in my best friend's bed. Carly and Spencer were visiting their granddad in Yakima for a few days or a week or whatever, which they knew wouldn't stop me from being at their house all the time anyway. So they gave me a key, which I had already lost, but I have a key to everyone's house called a bobby pin. They called me their "house sitter," but they don't have any animals or plants or anything, so my duties were as followed:

1. Take care of the Bottle Bot

2. Make sure none of Spencer's inventions burst into flames

3. Try NOT to eat all the meat in the house

The third task was already broken, re-broken, and re-re-broken.

So anyway, I was lying there all asleep and whatever, but the sound of the front door unlocking and opening quickly awoke me. The blood ran to my head, my heart jumped out of my chest, my adrenaline rushed and my fight or flight reaction told me to kick some ass. However, I reconsidered my options, and grabbed my phone.

FREDDIE'S POV

The sound of my phone vibrating against my bedside table woke me up. The light of my phone blinded me as I tried to focus on the time in the lower right hand corner. 2:34AM. I let out a small groan as I saw:

"NEW TEXT MESSAGE: BLONDE HEADED DEMON"

I thought about clicking "ignore," but chose not to. And I'm glad I didn't, because it read, "Come over to Carlys, nub. Im alone and I think I heard someone break in" It seemed like one of her usual shenanigans, but since she had actually bothered to attempt to use proper grammar, I took her seriously. I snarkily replied "What? You can't take em? You don't seem like the damsel in distress type to me." I got up after that, running my fingers through my messy hair and I quickly got her reply: "i was gonna but the only weapon carly has in her room is aerosol hair spray"

I'm sure she could picture my "rolling eyes smile" as she typed that out. Typical Sam. I texted back, "I was kidding, Sam. Stay right where you are."
There was no doubt in my mind that the petite blonde could probably kick the asses of anyone in Seattle, but I just really wanted her to be safe. I threw some clothes on, grabbed a wooden baseball bat, left my apartment and unlocked Carly's door with the emergency key on top of the door frame.

"Sam?" I said in a loud whisper. I snuck around the bottom floor of the apartment, my blood pumping, adrenaline rushing. The moon was bright, illuminating the entire first floor, a light that I'd much rather see a dirty blonde in than a dangerous criminal.

SAMS POV

After I texted Fredbag, I grabbed the lousy can of hairspray and snuck downstairs like a ninja. I held it as far away from me as I could; I'd much rather have an ACTUAL weapon, but tried to be as threatening as I could while holding hair products. I crept around, investigating the kitchen, thought about getting a snack, decided not to, checked out the living room, and headed down the hallway to Spencer's room. I thought I heard a noise coming from behind me, spun around 180° and slowly backed down the hallway. It was then when I backed into a very muscular body, and heard an ear-splitting, girl-in-a-horror-movie-being-murdered scream that was a probably few octaves above mine. Good thing I caught myself before I sprayed the shit out of the dishrag's eyes, because I turn around, and I had crashed into the front of Freddie's surpringly hard chest.

"Shit, Freddie, what's IN there?" I said, running my hand down his muscles.

"SAM! Are you okay!" he exclaimed, looking me up and down.

"I'm fine, Fredducini. I'd almost be impressed by your manliness if you didn't scream like a damn ballerina."

He rolled his eyes, "Are you sure you heard someone break in?"

"I'm absolutely sure!"

"Fine, well then get behind me and we'll keep looking."

I snickered and mockingly said, "Ooh, Freddie, I never saw you as the 'knight in shining armor' type."

"NO," he denied, "It's cuz I have a baseball bat and you have… Carly's… hairspray."

"Shut up, Benson, this is the expensive stuff, made specifically for blinding people who break into apartments at 3 in the morning." I said matter-of-factly.

He laughed silently and muttered, "Oh, really?" as we quietly argued back and forth while investigating the house, and as Freddie insisted, I was stuck behind him the whole time. 15 minutes of sneaking around, we decided the coast was clear. We crashed on the couch in the living room, and Freddie broke the silence that surrounded us.

"Well, I should probably… get back home, before my mom… has a panic attack."

"No, Benson, stay here! Spencer's got vodka in his room. Let's play some drinking games."

"Sam, it's Thursday."

"No, it's THIRSTY Thursday." I said with a grin. I jumped up, nearly skipped to Spencer's room, dug through his messy drawers and returned with a bottle of Absolut.

"You know I don't wanna do this, right?"

"Oh, don't be such a prancing prancy."

"What are we playing?"

"It's called I Never."

"And?"

"And… you gotta say something that you've never done, and if the other person's done it, they take a drink."

"That makes no sense."

"Sure it does. Learn by example… I've never kissed a girl." I grinned and handed him the bottle as he took a drink. I laughed as he tried to hide the fact that he already wanted to cough it back up and avoid my teenage antics.

FREDDIE'S POV

"My turn?" I said after thinking about bailing on Sam and her... teenage antics.

"Your turn." She repeated.

"Uhh… I never hung off a window-washer's platform that was eight stories high." I smirked, but at the same time relived all the rushing emotions, all over again.

"That doesn't count, Fredward, you were THERE. The point of this is to find out new chiz about each other, not to get each other drunk."

"Okay, fine." I was silent for a few moments, thinking. "I never… I never knew my dad."

She clenched her jaw and snatched the drink from me, taking an extra-long sip. I knew she wanted to leave, right then and there, but she didn't. I could tell, my words had just split her open. Sam's dad was one of the many things she didn't talk about. Carly had told me all she knew, Sam's dad was a deadbeat and one day he left. And that was all she knew.

"I'm sorry, Sam." I said sincerely.

"Yeah, whatever." She muttered, not looking me in the eyes as she took another swig.

"I never kissed a girl, AND her twin sister, AND her best friend." She said with a hint of angst.

"I thought you said no things we already knew?"

"I changed the rules!"

"Sam, you can't just change the rules in the middle of the game-"

"Myeeehhhh!" she interrupted. We argued while simultaneously passing the bottle back and forth, until we were seriously tipsy. After hours of drunken giggling, goofing, and arguing, I realised that the moonlight in Sam's eyes was now sunlight.

Sam suddenly got up, and I followed and grabbed her hand after she stumbled, almost falling to her knees.

"Can you make it?" I slurred, giggling.

"You're drunker than me, Fredly, don't try an' take care of me."

"You are… you are sooooooo drunker than me." I stammered and fell back down onto the couch.

"Pucketts know how to hold their liquor."

I laughed at her cliché drunken walk to the fridge, and she tossed me two water bottles. My reflexes were seriously alcohol affected, and as I tried to catch them I realised they were already on the floor. We silently drank them, and eventually her head was on my shoulder.

"Sam?" I said softly, "Are you awake?"

"Yeah… whats up?"

"Did you know you're my best friend?"

"Dude. I texted you at 2:30 in the morning and you woke your ass up and tried to come save me from an imaginary burglar. You think you're not mine? Don't tell anyone though."

I laughed, "Okay. It'll be our little secret. Really though… I wish tonight never ended."

"Yeah, you're gonna be saying that tomorrow morning during 'Freddie's First Hangover'," she said in a childish voice, pinching my cheek at the same time, "Just shut up… and close your eyes. It makes it feel more real."

I obeyed. And what I felt was my very own blonde-headed demon, reaching for my hand with a gentle touch I never knew she was capable of.

"I can just picture the cheesy fucking grin on your face right now."

So… what'd you think? :D r&r!