:YOAI: means boy-on-boy. Not into it, don't read. Simple as that.
A Misunderstanding
"Move your head, Yamanaka! I can't see!" complained a young girl as she attempted to push the blonde's head down below her own.
The kunoichi turned around and swatted at the hand pressed to her scalp. She brought a finger up to her lips and released a sound somewhere between a hiss and a hush. "He'll hear us, you moron!" she whispered angrily.
The girl snapped back, "Well it doesn't matter if I can't even see him, does it!" Ino was about to retaliate when the other girls in their group all clamped their hands over the two young ladies' mouths. The first girl just growled low and shifted her position so that she could see into the window they were all perched a few yards from. "Stupid Ino-pig…"
The window they were staring into was, of course, Uchiha Sasuke's very bedroom window. It was a ritual of sorts on Saturday mornings for his fan-club to prowl around the compound and gaze lecherously into his window when the sun was high enough for them to see in.
Being the top ranked ninja that he was, Sasuke obviously knew when they were around, and for the first years of this twisted tradition he had tried warding them off.
Explosive notes, wired traps, shutting his blinds… but most of the time it was too hot in Konoha, and being the only residence of the house (and a stingy bastard) his income was usually too little to supply him with air-conditioning so he really had little choice when keeping his windows open. At least those girls hadn't become so horrid as to actually invade his house… yet. At any rate, he'd tried everything, but the Hokage be damned they wouldn't leave.
At the age of sixteen, he'd become more or less used to ignoring it.
"Can you see him! Where is he!" one of the girls tried unsuccessfully not to squeal out. She was busy trying to hop over the person in front of her.
"SSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"Wait!" Ino whispered. "I see something moving!"
They all leaned out just a bit, as if it would make it easier to see.
"Damn it! I can't see. It's too dark in there and too far away!"
Ino leaned back with her hands on her hips. "I figured this would be the case. Who's turn was it to bring binoculars?"
One girl with shortly cropped brown hair looked away shyly. Ino smirked and tsked at her for a second. Her smirk grew when she pulled a pair from her kunai pouch. "Not to worry. I came prepared."
Taking turns, they all peered into the bedroom once more; with a near perfect view this time.
"Oooh, I see him!" the girl currently holding the binoculars whispered excitedly.
It wasn't so much him as it was, in fact, just a lump under the sheets of his bed. Said lump moved around slightly before falling still again for the next five minutes. The girl struggled a bit as the binoculars were pulled from her. She pouted, mumbling about how she didn't get a good look. With an apathetic shrug, Ino took a look herself.
The lump began moving again, but so far Sasuke remained buried under the mounds of blankets. She was about to pass the binoculars on when something strange occurred. A light shown briefly into the room and then a figure carrying Sasuke's clothes stepped from the bathroom, steam rolling in after him. It suddenly struck Ino after realizing that the figure also came with sopping black hair, that the figure with Sasuke's clothes was Sasuke!
Then who…?
"There's someone else in Sasuke's bed!" she almost shrieked.
A collective gasp was her response.
"You're lying!" one girl exclaimed and snatched the binoculars.
She peered in herself and, sure enough, Sasuke was sitting on the edge of his bad and tracing a hand over the shape of the person underneath the sheets. With tears in her eyes, she tossed the binoculars to the closest group member.
Some wretched whelp had seduced their Sasuke!
Ino snatched her binoculars back, but it wasn't hard since the disheartened girls were too lost in misery to really want to see anymore. The blonde strained her eyes to see better into the room. Suddenly, something happened that Ino hadn't expected in a million, trillion, zillion years. The mass of blankets began to shuffle around again, and from the tops of the covers, a head with a spot of color jutted out. A very distinct color. A pink color.
Her fingers twitched as Ino's mind concluded that only one person she knew had pink hair. Her hands clenched, and the force of her fingers digging into it caused the sides of the binoculars to crack. The girls looked up from their tears and sobs to see Ino fuming, her breath coming through her nose in angry snorts.
"Sa. Ku. Ra."
The syllables were spoken with the most contempt they'd ever heard. And then, when the shock of Ino's fury passed, all of them began to register just what name she'd uttered.
"Haruno!" they all whispered at the same time.
"What are we going to do? We can't let her get away with this!" "She's already on his team! This isn't fair!" "She's gotta go down!" "We'll never lay a hand on her if Sasuke-kun is protecting her!" "Ino! What'll we do!"
Ino put the binoculars away as she finished digesting everything. She smirked then.
"Come on. She's gotta go home sometime."
And they were all suddenly running top-speed to stake out the house of a certain pink-haired kunoichi, prepared to teach her the lesson of her life…
"They gone?" came a muffled, tired voice from beneath the thick blankets of Sasuke's bed.
The Uchiha smirked. "Yeah."
A yawn, and then the figure shot up from bed, arms arched up towards the ceiling, stretching every limb possible. Sasuke admired from the corner of his eyes as he sat on the edge of the bed and began pulling his shorts on.
"Took them long enough, damn it. What'd they leave for, anyhow?"
Sasuke shrugged, standing up and stretching his legs. He ignored the fact that he was probably giving his partner a show. It wasn't like it was something that the other didn't see every day, but Sasuke was usually fully clothed. This morning, he hadn't even bothered with underwear, much less a shirt or anything else.
Eyeing the Uchiha appreciatively for a second, the person in the bed reached up and pulled the nightcap from atop tussled blonde spikes. Gaze turning down to the cap, a frown marred their features and a loud sigh followed. Sasuke looked back.
"What is it, dobe?"
Naruto ignored the remark in favor of mourning his favorite nightcap.
Pouting, he said, "You could have warned me there were reds in that laundry."
Sasuke huffed as he stood again, finished stretching his legs, moving to his arms and back. Arching backwards until the tips of his black tresses touched the mattress. "It's not my fault you just took it upon yourself to throw your pajamas in the washer with my stuff without asking, dobe."
Naruto's eyebrow twitched in irritation.
"Stop calling me that if you want your ass laid ever again."
Still looking at the blonde, slightly smaller boy from upside down, Sasuke arched an eyebrow.
"My ass?"
That insufferable smirk only grew the more miffed Naruto seemed to get.
"Fuck you, bastard," he muttered looking away, a blush rising on his whiskered cheeks.
Sasuke decided not to comment and just finished up his morning stretches. Done, Sasuke walked to Naruto's side and took the faded pink nightcap from him. Examining it, he said, "It was already white, I'm sure you can bleach it back out." He tossed it back to his teammate and walked out of the room to find the idiot something for breakfast.
Naruto snorted and put his chin in his hands, feeling as if Sasuke had managed to once again make a complete moron out of him. And after he let the bastard be on top every night, too.
"Oi, dobe, what do you want for breakfast?" the darker teenager called from the kitchen.
Naruto's eyes brightened at that. But the bastard cooked breakfast for him every morning, so it was a fair exchange in the future Hokage's mind. He opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off last second.
"-and if you say ramen I'll cut you, I swear."
Naruto's face fell slightly. "Then don't ask, jerk! Cook anything!" he yelled back.
He would have added the usual 'bastard' in there somewhere, but then he'd remembered that he'd end up needing to use Sasuke's laundry room again if he wanted his cap back the same way. He fell back into the pillows with a huff. He smiled when he thought of how the day might go, and then smiled even wider when he thought of what Sakura-chan might be doing this morning.
… Both he and Sasuke would find out later when a surly Sakura- sporting a brand new shiner for her left eye- pounded them into the ground shouting obscenities (mostly on inner-Sakura's behalf) and screaming about how "her queer-ass best friends were going to come out of the god-damned closet and help her pay for the flowers she'd have to be sending to thirteen Konoha girls' hospital rooms".
Goddess of Oblivion: This took me longer than I thought it would to write. I love SasuNaru (I like plenty of het and yaoi pairings in Naruto) and decided that I wanted to write something humorous on them. I hope it was okay. Obviously nothing graphic, but you've gotta be pretty dim if you didn't pick up on the blatant references.
And to all the Sakura haters- I like her personally, so I was nice to her in this story. But it's nothing any of you should get your feathers ruffled over. Please don't leave reviews saying stuff like "boo!11111 sakura should DIE!11111" and crap. She's a main character in the story, she's staying, and other characters of Naruto care about her. Deal with it, you guys.
Hope you enjoyed, and R&R please!