My revised Chapter 1 let me know if you like this more. I just feel like I can do better so I promise to step it up, I feel like I kind of cheated you all out of some details and events.

Chapter 1

If you aren't careful, you will be dead.

I wipe my sweaty palms across my pants, taking a deep breath. I stand next to Caleb, hoping that somehow my choice will stumble upon me. Maybe when I get to the bowls, I will find clarity. Perhaps, feeling the knife across my hand will open my eyes to the right decision.

There is no right decision, you are Divergent.

The voice in the back of my mind keeps reminding me that this more than a choice of who I will be for the rest of my life, it is a choice of whether or not I will have a life to live. Caleb's name is called, I release another shaky breath. Did the time fly that fast? Caleb nears the bowl, he seems so sure of himself. A comfort I do not have. Caleb doesn't turn to look at our parents or at me. What is it like to know that you are perfectly content with being selfless? How does it feel to not have a doubt in your mind over where you truly belong?

Caleb's hand reaches out. I hold in my gasp as he throws his hand out over the bowl of water. He has chosen Erudite. I bite the inside of my cheek, my brother was supposed to be selfless enough to cut his hand and set it over the full grey stones, yet to be splattered with vermilion blood. Instead, it was just muddled with the now dull red water of Erudite. I vaguely hear my name and walk towards the bowls that will determine my future. I look to my parents, see my father's anguish within his eyes and debate my decision. I take yet another breath and cut my hand, deeply, hoping that maybe the pain will help me focus on making a decision. I watch my father's anguish turn into hope as he looks at me. And with what little piece of Abnegation that is in me, I move my hand out, it begins to rove towards the burning coals that ignite my soul. I want so badly to be selfish and give into my wants, my desires, my fire.

My blood drips down my hand and onto the floor, I need to choose. I can tell everyone's eyes are on me. I am selfish, my instinct is self-preservation. Where will I live longest? Where will I be safe? I move my hand once again. My decision has been made, I find myself reaching for the place where I can be me. I shut my eyes. Where will I go? Will I be free?

I stay true to the life I was raised in. My blood is the first to stain the grey coals, the first to identify myself as a member Abnegation.

Forgotten, lost, and hidden.

A small piece in a never ending dull color that is easily forgotten. I walk away and stand alone, until a few others join me, none of course people who I speak to often or even really know. Except Susan. I almost snort, I don't really know any of them. We can't ask questions, curiosity is not a very Abnegation trait. I need to stop thinking this way, I have made my decision, I will need to stick with it and with a better attitude. I can handle this, I was going to switch to Dauntless, initiation there must be harder than this. If I could have passed initiation there, I can definitely pass it here.

I hear the thunderous steps of Dauntless, my stare lingering for a moment on them. I could have been there. My father begins to clean up once everyone has left. I follow his direction and help the rest of my faction. Susan walks towards me, "do you need any help Beatrice?" I see some sadness in Susan's eyes, I wonder if she was shocked when Robert switched?

"No, but thank you Susan." I lend her a small smile and finish cleaning everything up. This is the world that I am going to be in forever, I should work on perfecting my Abnegation tendencies. My father turns to us, looking at each of us to get our attention. Although, we don't speak often and are hardly ever doing anything but listening to others. Each of us keeps our heads slightly bowed, as if to humble and selfless to show confidence in ourselves.

"Initiates please come with me. I will be your instructor for today, since we do not want to burden our fellow members with training you the entire thirty days. As a result, we will be sharing the responsibility. We would like to teach you how to be a part of the community and you can learn that best with Abnegation members who have various professions. It takes a village to raise a child, and you are the future of Abnegation, we should properly prepare you for a life of selflessness."

I focus on my father telling us about our stay here in Abnegation and the general schedule of initiation.

Walking with my faction, I recognize that I can be safe here with my family.

For dinner I sit next to Susan eating quietly and looking at my food. I wonder what I would be eating in Dauntless?

Would it be this silent?

Would I have made friends, real friends?

I set my fork into the chicken, which after staring at it for a few moments begins to lose its brown color and turn into grey. Susan gives me a small, Abnegation smile. I'm jealous of Susan Black. She just fits in perfectly, I bet her aptitude test went just as planned. I bet it all went perfectly normal, and when her name was called she walked to the bowls, with ease cut her hand, and felt no sense of wonder or regret or fear over which choice she would make. I bet she even felt secure in her decision. I head to the room that I share with the other female initiates. I sit down on my bed and unwrap my hair from it's bun. My blonde locks cascade around my shoulders.

After debating going to sleep, I decide to walk a bit. Susan is already preparing for bed, she smiles at me, "are you feeling alright, Beatrice?"

"I'm fine thank you, I'm just going to get some water." Susan seems to accept this and turns to her bed. I shouldn't lie that easily, especially to innocent and sweet Susan. I walk down a hall, peering into open doors and listening for footsteps, indicating someone might see me. I walk towards the back door, hopping for some fresh air.

I sit along grass and stare at the stars, I am in Abnegation. I have chosen to stay here. I will forget myself and serve others. Pressing my hands into the grass, I focus on the city in front of me. What would I be doing in Dauntless right now?

Would I be awake? Would I miss my family?

I hear a creaking and turn to see a tall silhouette. Immediately, I push myself off the ground. I attempt to think of an excuse as to why I am outside at this time when I should be sleeping. Standing tall, I look up into a pair of black eyes, peering closer they seem more of a dark blue hue. "What are you doing out here?"

"I.." I was careful to make sure I wasn't seen, there is no way he could have seen me. So why is he here? "What are you doing out here?"

He seems slightly taken back by my answer, "you are not a transfer?"

"No, I'm not."

"Then you should know better than wandering around when you should be sleeping."

I feel some of my pride surge within me, how can he tell me what to do when he shouldn't be out here either. I look at him closer, "you are Marcus's son aren't you?" I struggle to remember his name, it started with a T, "Tobias."

Tobias's lips form a flat line, I can see his jaw is drawn tight. "You are Andrew's daughter, correct?"

We have been talking in circles it seems, neither one of us answering a question, but replying with another one. "Yes, I am. I'm Beatrice."

Tobias nods, "I recommend you return to the dorm with the female initiates."

I bite my tongue and walk towards the door, Tobias clears his throat. I turn around to face him, "be careful, Beatrice."

I wince at my name, it sounds much too grey, much too selfless, I need it to sound more like me. Divergent. I shake my head and walk inside. I can't be Divergent, I need to be Abnegation. I slip into the dorm and fall into the scratchy grey sheets.

My father passes us each a trash bag, "today, we help clean up the Factionless sector of the city. This is an important job, one you should consider if you would like to help those who can not help themselves. When we aid the Factionless we help make their lives healthier and safer. Each take a trash bag and collect any trash you find. We will do this until lunch, then we will spend the afternoon canning food for the Factionless. Stay here on this main stretch of road."

I follow the other initiates and pick up trash as I see it, I never was comfortable here in the Factionless. I walk along the pieces of broken glass, tossing empty cans and paper into the bag. Despite the instructions to stay with everyone else, I leave the main path and follow the twists and turns of the abandoned buildings. I turn the corner and see a few Factionless standing around in a circle, their mismatch clothing, tattered and loose. My mother stitches socks for the Factionless, I wonder how many of them are wearing her socks. I see a figure run past them, a blur of grey streaking my view.

Was that an Abnegation?

An Abnegation running through the Factionless? Curiosity gets the best of me, I walk along the edges of the Factionless in the direction of the blur. I hear a few voices nearby, hiding behind the corner I look at the tall grey Abnegation man speaking to an older woman.

I've seen him before, I blink, Tobias. Tobias Eaton, what is he doing here? Why is he speaking to that woman? Confusion twists at my mind, I stand and watch them talk together. I wonder what they are saying?

I need to go, I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have ever left the main road, this is a very not-Abnegation thing to do. I peel myself away from the corner and walk towards my father and the other initiates. Questions race through my mind about what Tobias was doing in the Factionless.

After a few minutes of picking up trash, I come to a conclusion, Tobias Eaton is not as he seems.

He definitely is not a strict, straight-laced, Abnegation.

He doesn't stick to the guidelines of our faction.

I wonder why.

Okay my revised chapter 1. Hope you enjoy, please tell me what you think!