Title: Honesty
Author: Blondezilla90
Raiting: G
Characters/Pairing: Jesse, Finn/Rachel
Word Count: ~2500
Disclaimer: The characters do not belong to me. If they would you'd think I'd write only fan fictions about them?
Summary: Rachel flips out at Finn causing them both to be honest to each other.
AN: This is my take on the scene after the Run Joey Run video. I didn't like the fact that Finn said to Rachel she put her rep over her relationships. He did the same thing to her. I am just mad about the lack of anger from Rachel...so et voilà...enjoy.
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„This is garbage!" Finn yelled angrily and heard how Mr. Schuester was yelling no in response and Puck surprisingly agreed with Finn. What the hell was Rachel thinking?
"Why didn't you tell me they were in this too?! I thought you and I were going out? Being triple cast with two other guys to play opposite girlfriend. It's mortifying!" Jesse interrupted Puck and jumped up, taking a few steps towards Rachel.
"You know before I transferred here to make you my girlfriend I asked around about you...found out the rep of the kind of girl you were.....most of them had no idea who you were...the ones that did said you were kind of sneaky hot, but that that quality was canceled out by the compulsive need to be right and a strange infinity to wear sweaters with animals on them....and although neither of them liked you they said you were a person that can be trusted....and this....as the person who gave up everything I cannot look past this..." He mumbled to her in front of the entire club, tears building in her eyes as Jesse stepped away to leave the room.
Rachel chewed on her lower lip and quickly wiped her face, trying to hide her tears. She wasn't going to cry in front of the others and she certainly won't cry over Jesse. If he didn't want to understand her, it was his loss. She liked him a lot, but if he couldn't look past that he might as well dump her. She knew she wasn't flawless and she knew her faults even if she tried to deny it in front of other people.
Slowly she raised her head and saw how the others slowly got up from their chairs, passing her to leave the room. The only person who remained seated was Finn. Rachel swallowed hard and looked at him pleadingly. She just lost her boy friend, she couldn't lose her friend either. She drew in a shaky breath and ran her hands over her skirt, trying to calm herself down. Finn got up from his seat and walked towards Rachel, looking down at her.
"How could you do this to us? Is your stupid reputation more important to you than your relationships?" Finn's words hit her like a brick and Rachel felt her stomach turning with anger. He was about leave when he saw Rachel spin around and kick the white screen. With a loud thud it fell to the ground and Finn stopped dead in his tracks. That certainly was a new side of Rachel.
"Rachel..." He started and reached out for her, but she yet again spun around and slapped his hand away, her eyes brimming with tears.
"You can't be serious....PLEASE tell me you're NOT serious." She half yelled, which caught the attention of Mercedes, Kurt, Tina, Artie, Puck and Quinn who were still outside the choir-room.
"Weren't YOU the one who broke up with ME to save your reputation????????? Instead of dating me you went on a date with Brittany and Santana....AND YOU WANT TO TELL ME MY REPUTATION IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN MY RELATIONSHIPS? I loved you, Finn.....and YOU LEFT ME....for YOUR reputation...." Rachel was screaming now in anger, pushing Finn away from her in rage. He just stared at her in shock and tried to process everything. He was about to say something, but Rachel just rambled on.
"And don't pull this 'I wanted to get back with you' crap. You've hurt me more than one time, because your stupid rep was more important to you and now I am doing one thing for me and suddenly I don't care? THAT'S NOT FAIR..:" Her voice was shaky and her whole body was shaking . She swallowed hard as tears started to run down her cheeks.. She quickly turned around and ran out of the room, pushing past the others.
Finn looked after her while all sorts of emotions cursed through his body. How could he have been so stupid? He wanted to literally face palm himself or smash his head into a wall. He deserved it. Over and over again he hurt her. He sighed and lowered his gaze, shoving his hands into his pockets. Kurt and Mercedes slowly made their way over to him, but before anybody could say something, Finn stormed out of the room and ran along the corridor and out of school.
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Rachel was laying on her bed, curled up with her knees tucked under her chin, while cascades of tears rand down her cheeks. Her eyes were red and swollen, her cheeks red and nose running, but she didn't move. She hasn't moved since she got home and laid down on her bed. The events from earlier did not leave her mind and Rachel felt like a complete fool.
She knew she shouldn't have done the video the way she did, but she wanted everything to stop. She didn't want to get slushie facials anymore and she didn't want her things getting flushed down the toilet. She wanted the torture to stop. She hoped the guys would understand, but apparently they didn't Jesse officially broke up with her via text message two hours after practice and Puck went back to his old self, ignoring her completely.
That didn't sting as much as Finn's reaction. He made her wanting to disappear from the face of this earth. Finn, who had her completely lose her temper in front of the Glee kids. Finn, who accused her of things he did to her as well. She couldn't believe he was accusing her of such thing. He himself hurt her and left her to 'find his inner rock star' and to rebuild his popularity in which she didn't fit in. He had to hurt her in order to realize just how much he wants to be her.
Rachel wasn't a person who bears grudges, especially with Finn, although that one had hurt the most out of everything he had done to her. He tossed her aside like a piece of paper and thought she'd wait for him once he realized what he wanted. Jesse however changed everything. He came into her life and messed it up, turning it partly for the better. As hard as Rachel tried to fall in love with him, she couldn't. Somehow there was a special bond, but Rachel didn't feel the sparks between herself and Jesse. It wasn't until he wanted to sleep with her, that Rachel realized she wasn't in love with him. She was in love with Finn. Totally, utterly, head over heels in love, despite the way he had treated her.
As her thoughts kept drifting off to Finn, her tears slowly resolving as her sobs subsided, Rachel noticed just how exhausted she was. She slowly turned her head and took a glance at the clock. It was way past 3 am and she had to get up for school in 3 hours. She sighed and rolled on her back, taking a moment before she got up and made her way downstairs. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep and thankfully her fathers were away, so they wouldn't question her appearance.
She walked into the kitchen and made herself some hot chocolate. She grabbed one of the quilts off the couch and made her way towards the front porch. She sat down on a white bench and wrapped the quilt tightly around her body, while she put up her knees and hugged them with one arm, holding her mug with the other.
She took a deep breath and listened to the grasshoppers chirping, frowning when she heard quiet steps on the sidewalk. She got curious and leaned over to peek past the bushes, her breath getting caught when she saw a really tall, male person walking towards her house. She put the mug away and dropped to her knees, inching closer to the railing. She held her breath for a second and tried to be as quite as possible, moving her eyes up to look at the person yet again.
Her jaw dropped as she saw the stranger pick up stones, which he threw towards her bedroom. She didn't budge and the person grew bolder, throwing more stones towards the window. He seemed to get frustrated, throwing a handful of little stones towards the porch. Rachel squeaked as the tiny stones hit her everywhere, biting her lower lip.
"Rachel?" The person whispered and stepped towards the porch. The light went on and she finally saw who the stranger was.
"Finn?" She said in disbelieve and got up, wrapping the quilt protectively around her body.
"What are you doing out there?" He asked in surprise and walked towards her. Rachel backed away and bumped into the bench, sitting down.
"What are you doing here at MY house at 3 in the morning?" She spat back and grabbed her mug to take a big sip of her chocolate, almost choking as she swallowed one of the little stones. She coughed loudly and made a face, putting the mug away.
"I couldn't sleep....." Finn admitted honestly. "And I wanted to talk to you."
"And that idea comes to you at 3 in the morning?" She asked in disbelieve, lowering her gaze to the ground.
"Yes...and Kurt was freaking me out....Seriously he has some weird sleeping habits!" They both chuckled a little and Finn walked towards the bench, sitting down.
"I am sorry Rachel....I am sorry for what I said to you, I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you. I was so stupid. I am still stupid. Believe me I never meant to hurt you, but all this talk from Mr. Schue and the whole Quinn thing, I was so confused." He drew in a breath and turned his head to look at her. Rachel was still staring at the ground and as she remained silent, Finn took it as a cue to go on.
"You see....I like you Rachel...I mean I REALLY like you. I like you so much it freaks me out, but I had just lost my girlfriend and my baby. Suddenly you arranged dates for us and practically thought we were a couple. You even made kitty cat calenders. It freaked me out. I felt like you made decisions for me, just like Quinn used to do the entire time I was dating her. I didn't like it. So I put it to a halt and went out with Santana and Brittany, who finally made me realize just how much I want you. I wanted you back before it was too late. Little did I know it already was."
Finn stopped speaking and swallowed hard, feeling a huge lump in his throat forming. His heart was thumping like crazy and he felt dizzy and sick to his stomach. He didn't expect her to jump into his arms, but he hoped she'd at least give him another chance, a chance to make it all up to her.
"I am sorry as well...the video was a little over the top. All I wanted was the humiliation and torture at school to end. I don't want to be slushied every day anymore. I don't want to be hurt by the people in glee club anymore. I've reached a point where it's too much.. It was selfish of me to make this video, I realize that now, but back than I hoped it would solve some of my problems. Little did I know it would make everything worse." A silent sob escaped her lips as tears slid down her face and Rachel quickly wiped her face.
"The comment you made about me made me realize what a selfish fool I was, but at the same time it made me hate you. You did the exact same thing to me. You put your need for a good rep over your relationship. I know I was straight forward and a little too enthusiastic about it, but it was the first time a boy wanted to date me. Me...Rachel Berry...The weird geek queen." Finn's eyes fixed on her as he slid closer to her. Finally he could understand a part of Rachel. It was all a lot clearer now.
"I just want someone....who loves me for who I am. Loves be for every quirk I have, for every annoying habit I have. I know I'm not the easiest person to be around, but don't I deserve to be loved?" Her voice was shaky and more tears escaped her eyes. It ripped Finn's heart in two and he finally closed them gap between them, wrapping his arm around her shoulder to pull her against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and held her as she cried.
"I do," he finally whispered into her hair. She froze a little and shifted her body to look at him.
"What?" She whispered and looked at him stunned. Finn raised his hand to cup her cheek, brushing his thumbs against her cheek to wipe away her tears.
"I said I do....I love you for who you are....I know I am stupid and slow...and I hurt you, but it doesn't change the fact that I love you." His voice was barely above a whisper and if Rachel hadn't been so close she knew she'd have missed it.
"You....you love me?" She stuttered and stared at him in disbelieve. Finn nodded his head in response and inched closer to her face.
"Earlier you said you loved me....it made me realize that I have equally strong feelings for you. All I think about is you, you all day long." Finn smiled a little in the dark and leaned into Rachel, brushing his lips softly against hers. Rachel's entire body froze in place, but as soon as he moved his head she responded to the kiss, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck to pull him closer.
They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, holding each other tightly while kissing. Rachel felt her heart flutter and finally, after what seemed like ages she felt content. Finn's arms wrapped around her body and his lips pressed to hers were the best feeling in the whole world. She never wanted to let go, ever again.
"I love you too...," she whispered into the kiss and pulled away as her lungs started burning. Their breaths were heavy and the only sounds besides the grasshoppers that could be heard. Finn smiled brightly as he tried to catch his breath, pulling Rachel on his lap to hold her tightly, burying his face in her chest. She smiled in return and leaned her cheek against his head, knowing that this was the way things should have been all along.
THE END
