(A/N: Yes, another self-insert. And by someone who's terribly inexperienced at writing. Ah well. Maybe it'll be fun, maybe it'll be crap. Who knows…Probably crap.
Ah well. A tip of my metaphorical hat to both Herr Wozzeck and iNf3ctioNZ for inspiring me to do this. By the way, the first section was written a very long time ago and the writing style MAY change ever so slightly in the rest of the chapter. But I don't really know. Seriously, it's late and I can't be bothered to check.
Random disclaimer stuff: Mass Effect, its characters, and everything in its universe is not owned by me. 'Tis owned by Bioware. And I don't own any random things I may reference (bands, sodas, cheeses etc.))
The appendix. No, not that part at the end of a book that never has what you're looking for. I mean the equally useless part of your colon. I never really paid it much attention until today. Why today? Because today it decided to rupture…Or at least almost rupture. Hopefully they'll get it out before then.
They've put me on an I.V. with some painkillers. At least I think that's what it's for. I'm not sure anymore. I don't really care either. People tend to not care about much of anything when all they've been doing for the past couple hours is sleep and vomit I guess. The pain has subsided though, so I guess they've given me something for it. The surgeon strides into my tiny hospital room, looking very business-like. I wonder if he's ticked off he had to come in on a Sunday? I figure he gets calls like this a lot though.
He's talking to Mom about something. Oh yeah, did I mention Mom's here? I think I forgot to. He walks over to me, and begins pushing on my left side.
"Where does it hurt more?" he asks, moving his hand from my left to my right. The pressure issues a groan from me. "Yeah, it's appendicitis."
Well what the hell did you think it is? I just have a little tummy ache? Sheesh!
He's saying something to Mom again. Something about immediate surgery. Surgery…I've never had surgery before. This is weird. How did this happen? I'm fourteen for crying out loud! I shouldn't be having my appendix out!
The surgeon steps out and two older ladies wheel in another hospital bed. "Can you move yourself over onto this bed here?" one of them says as they scoot it up next to mine.
"Sure. Why not?" I mutter. I'm not in the cheeriest of moods. I don't think anyone would be in my situation.
They wheel me out down the hallway, my mom following. They reach some rather imposing metal doors, at which they stop. "You'll have to say goodbye here," one says to my mom.
She holds my hand and kisses my forehead. "I'll see you later, sweetie."
"Bye," I manage to choke out. Dang it, why am I choking up? It's just a little surgery, that's all. Nothing big. No big deal. No big deal…
She finally releases my hand as the double doors swing open and the nurses resume their journey to the operating room.
"I love you."
"I love you too!" I call back, with some effort. I feel my eyes tear up slightly. Oh no. I am not crying. There's nothing to cry about. No need to be dramatic.
It's just one depressing white hallway after the next until we reach the operating room. They wheel the bed next to the table. "Can you move yourself onto here?" one of them asks.
"I believe so," I reply, gently scooting onto the table. Dang, it's cold in here. Someone places a blanket over my legs, as if on cue.
"I'm going to put this mask over your face. When I do, I want you to start counting to ten, alright?"
" 'kay." Mask…Is that the anesthetic? I've never been knocked out before. Probably because I've never had surgery before. I wonder if I'm going to have a big scar…No, they'll probably make a little hole and just pull it out from there.
While I'm contemplating the possibility of scarring, the nurse…well, I guess more A nurse, places a plastic breathing mask thingy on my face. My vision instantly blurs. Dang, that was fast! I should probably be counting now. "One. Two. Three." My hearing starts getting hazy, like all the rest of my senses. "Four. Five…"
Well, I guess I'm supposed to close my eyes now.
…
That wasn't too bad. I didn't wake up during surgery at least. So that's nice.
But…where did I wake up?
Slowly open eyes…ok, there are blinding lights in this room. Why are the lights blinding? I wasn't under for that long…
Adjusting, adjusting…Alright, I can see now. Awesome.
…Or not.
Right, so this is the part where I start wondering why I'm on a table in the middle of a bare white room…And why there's a window on the wall to my left.
And why the guy behind it is freaking out.
Aaand why I'm strapped down to said table.
It looks like he's trying to communicate with someone via intercom.
Oh, god! Why did trying to speak just now result in a coughing fit? And on top of all that…
Where the hell am I?
God my head hurts! Why did it just start hurting now? Was it the extreme coughing? Did…What? Everything's dark now. Why is it dark? What just-SHIT! My head feels like it's about to explode! And that goddamn siren isn't helping! Why is there a siren anyway? And those annoying red lights? All I want to know is where the hell I am!
Footsteps? Someone just came in the room. I look to my left, and see that same guy that was behind the window walking (rather quickly) to my table. Finally, I can get some answers. Hopefully I won't start coughing again.
"Where-…" God, not the coughing again. Speak! Speak damn you! "Where am I?" There! And don't say no hablo ingles!
"Jag talar inte engelska."
Wha...What? What the fuck does that mean? He puts his finger to his lips in a shush sign, and starts undoing my restraints. Ok, at least I'm not naked. Though I am in this weird hospitalish gown-like thing...
I manage to sit up with some effort, and look at the man to my left to see him motion for me to follow him. Great, so I'm supposed to follow a strange german man through a strange not-quite-hospital in a strange not-quite-gown? And he looks like he's in his twenties, so he could probably overpower me with ease. This can't be good. He seems to be pretty excited about something...Also pretty freaked out too. I'm with him on the freaked out part. And...wait, what the crap is he wearing? It looks like the generic doctors outfit from Mass Effect. Why the hell would he be wearing that?
Looks like I've been thinking too long. He's getting anxious. Alright, I'll follow you you crazy blonde haired blue eyed Nazi. That was racist, wasn't it? Crap.
I jump off the table and proceed to follow him out the door. I wasn't expecting to feel this energetic right after surgery...Oh look, long hallway with flashing red lights and sirens blaring in my ears. Fun. He starts to run, and I follow. Did something go wrong somewhere? I hear a voice amidst the sirens and footsteps, but it sounds like spanish. Spanish? Wasn't this guy speaking some sort of germanic language? Evacuar...sounds like evacuate. What happened? Where's Mom? God I hope she's ok.
He turns right down another hallway, and left down yet another. Is this whole building just a collection of hallways? He suddenly stops in front of a door, and starts fumbling with a...what is that? It looks like a glowy hologramy keypad thing. Why is it glowy? Keypads don't glow!
The door opens with a loud woosh, and reveals...Holy...Is that...a spaceship?
In a docking bay?
With a frickin' salarian in front of it?
...
This is not my day.
(A/N: Right, so I would add more, but again, it's late, and I want to get this thing up after months of delaying. So let me know if it's decent, if it sucks, whatever. Hopefully this will turn into an epic adventure-like thing...But for now, it's late.)