Hi everybody!
So, it doesn't count as yet another Furt fic if there's a third person involved, right? *grasping at straws*
In any case, I was inspired by "The Spanish Teacher" when Sam revealed that he lives with Finn and Kurt now and this idea popped into my head within seconds. :)
Glee is copyright Ryan Murphy, The movies I mention are copyright James Cameron and there other respective owners.
Enjoy!
"This is gonna be so sweet!" Sam said as he flopped himself down onto the mattress that folded out of the couch.
"Ladies and gentlemen," Finn began, imitating an arena announcer's voice, "welcome back to the weekly Hudson-Hummel Movie Night Extravaganza, this week with special guest Sam Evans!"
Kurt simply rolled his eyes as he sat down beside Sam. His brother always managed to turn every little thing into a big spectacle.
"Ok," Finn continued, back to business, "Now we just need to pick a movie," He sat down in front of the movie cabinet and began perusing through the various titles. "We should totally watch Die Hard!"
"I was going to say The Notebook," Kurt chimed in.
"Avatar?" Sam asked, his eyes sparkling and his mouth forming a huge grin.
"Hmm," Finn hummed, "Apocalypse Now?"
"Titanic."
"Avatar?"
"Alien vs. Predator?"
"The Time-Traveller's Wife."
"Avatar?"
"This might be harder than I thought," Finn said.
"Wait a minute you guys," Sam piped up, "I thought of something, we have tomorrow off school, so that means we get three nights to watch movies, right?"
"Sure…" Finn said. He didn't like it when people brought up math.
"And we all mentioned something connected to James Cameron, so what if we watched Aliens tonight, Titanic tomorrow and Avatar on Saturday?" Sam finished, smiling at his own problem-solving skills.
"You're a genius," Kurt said, "Usually Finn and I spend so much time debating that we just end up going to bed without watching anything."
"Alright cool," Finn said, smiling, "But Aliens is the second movie. We need to watch Alien first to get what's going on."
"Fine," Kurt muttered. He wasn't going to enjoy this night anyway, so he might as well let Finn cram as much blood and guts into it as he could.
Finn popped the movie into the player and then leapt across the room onto the fold-out mattress, the impact bouncing Kurt up a foot into the air.
"Sometimes I think you're the one who's not from this planet, Finn."
It was even worse than Kurt expected. It seemed somebody was suffering a bloody death every ten seconds. And those facehugger things were beyond creepy.
"No, don't turn into that hallway!" Kurt shouted, "DON'T GO INTO THE HALLWAY! Ew, gross, Finnnn, " The shouts turned into whines as Kurt held onto Finn's arm like his life depended on it, burying his face in his brother's shoulder.
"It's ok, Kurt, it's gone now, you can look again," Finn reassured his smaller brother. Kurt looked up just in time to see the alien biting the man's neck. He screamed and hid his face again while Finn and Sam both laughed.
"That isn't funny, you jerks!" Kurt hollered as he repeatedly slapped Finn's arm.
"It kinda is," Finn said as he stood up; that big, dumb, grin on his face, "Anyway, I have this movie pretty much memorised so I'll go make the popcorn," He explained before walking up the stairs.
"I don't know how anybody could eat while watching this," Kurt mumbled. It was at that moment that another poor idiot was stabbed by one of those vile creatures. Without thinking Kurt latched onto Sam's bicep. "Ew, ew, ew," he moaned. He realized what he was doing a few moments later.
"Sorry," he said as he relinquished his grip on Sam's arm.
"It's okay man," Sam said, "Just don't tell Mercedes."
"Oh trust me, I'll do everything I can to remove this entire night from my memory," Kurt said as he grabbed onto Sam's well-muscled arm again.
Finn came back into the room several minutes later holding a big bowl of buttery popcorn, smiling at the sounds of death and destruction. Then he looked up and saw his little brother cuddling up against Sam. Suddenly he was imagining causing some death and destruction himself.
"Hey Evans, do I need to drag you out back and have a little talk with you?" Finn growled, his brow furrowed. Sam's eyes widened as he began to stutter.
"I…I wasn't…we…"
"Oh, don't be so dramatic, Finn," Kurt sighed, "I took Sam's arm hostage completely against his will."
"Alright, if you say so," Finn said, although his facial expression didn't change. He handed Sam the bowl and sat back down, "Just get back over here," he added, patting his own shoulder. Kurt just rolled his eyes, something Finn was rather used to, before swapping arms and leaning his head on Finn's shoulder.
Finally the moment came when the heroine was able to hurl that god-forsaken alien queen into space. Kurt had never felt so relieved in his life.
"You know," he said, "That final fight was kind of impressive."
"Yeah well, it's all over now so you can stop squealing," Finn replied as he rolled his eyes.
Kurt rolled his eyes right back, then got up to take the movie out.
"I still don't get how you can watch such mindless garbage though," he said as he put the movie back on the shelf. When he turned back around he was met with a many-tentacled thing latching on to his face. His scream was instantly muffled by the thing covering his mouth.
Kurt angrily slapped Finn's wrist, knocking the stuffed octopus he was holding onto the floor.
"Dude, you should have seen your eyes!" Finn choked out between his laughter, "They were massive!"
"He can, I got a picture of it," Sam said, also laughing as he held up his phone. "And so can all 280 people on my friend's list!"
"You're both EVIL!" Kurt exclaimed before turning on his heel and walking up the stairs, leaving behind the sound of the two jocks and their obnoxious laughter.
"Take that!" Finn shouted as he poked the screen on his phone. The black Angry Bird exploded, sending all the wood and stones flying everywhere, raining down on the green pigs.
"Yeah!" Finn shouted again. He had been holed up in his room working on that level for hours. He was about to start the next one when his phone vibrated. It was a text from Kurt.
"Get down here, we're about to start! 3 3 3"
"Oh yeah," Finn grumbled to himself, "tonight is Kurt's dumb romance movie." He really didn't want to watch that movie, but he guessed he owed it to his little brother after making him sit through two horror flicks.
Finn slowly made his way downstairs, thinking up possible ways to get out of what would surely be torture. According to Kurt this movie was like seven hours long.
"Mmm, yeah Kurt," Finn heard Sam moan. Confused, Finn stopped and hid around the corner.
"That feels soooooo good," Sam moaned again.
"This is just a warm up. Wait till I start putting some real effort in," Kurt replied coyly.
I knew it, Finn thought to himself, I knew the arm thing yesterday was something. And now they're …ew…right in the middle of my living room? God! Then he started to think about what he should do to beat Sam up. He was torn between punching his face or his gut first, when he heard Sam moan again.
"Alright, that's enough!" Finn yelled as he came around the corner. The sight that greeted him wasn't quite what he expected.
Kurt was sitting on the edge of the bed with Sam's feet in his lap, gently massaging them.
"Something the matter, Finn?" Kurt asked, concerned about the look on Finn's face.
"Uh, no," Finn said, "I just really want to get this movie over with,"
"One minute man," Sam said as he lay with his arms behind his head, "Yeah right there Kurt, that's perfect," he moaned as Kurt rubbed small circles into the balls of his big feet. He looked over at Finn, smiling, "I know this looks weird, but he gives really great footrubs."
Finn smiled fondly as he sat down beside Sam, remembering all the times Kurt would rub his own tired feet after his football games. "Yeah I know," he said. "Hey Kurt, any chance you could do mine next?" he asked as he swung his big bare feet up onto the mattress, wiggling his large toes.
"No way," Kurt said as he let go of Sam's feet and stood up. "We're not going to delay this cinematic masterpiece any longer."
"I can hardly wait," Finn mumbled as he and Sam shared a look of annoyance.
It started off as bad as Finn expected. Some rich, classy, holier-than-thou lady had a jerk of a fiancé and then there was this poor down-on-his-luck scamp who fell in love with her. Yawn.
And then there was the fact that whenever the music picked up Kurt would sing the words to "My Heart Will Go On" as loud as he possibly could. This movie felt like it was going on for days.
Although Finn had to admit that it did pick up a little during the middle. The "I'm Flying" thing was kinda cool, and the rest of the plot was actually original, unlike every single rom-com that Rachel had made him watch over the years.
Just after the characters had finished their baby-making in that old jalopy, Finn's stomach growled loudly. "Who's going to make the popcorn today?" he asked.
"Rock, Paper, Scissors?" Sam suggested. The other two nodded their approval.
"1, 2, 3, go!" Finn said as they each picked a hand formation.
"Ha! Paper beats both of your rocks! I win!" Kurt gloated.
"Paper might beat one rock, but if you're up against two," Sam explained as he and Finn both pinned Kurt's outstretched hand between their fists, "You don't stand much of a chance."
"What are you talking about! Relinquish my hand at once!" Kurt ordered as he tried unsuccessfully to tug his hand out from between their fists.
"It's true dude. The two rocks would clash together and probably cause a spark, and then your paper would burn into ashes," Finn explained with mock sympathy, "Tough luck."
"Why?" Kurt asked as his hand was freed, "Why do you two always have to act like buffoons?" He slid off the fold-out and ran upstairs before either of them attempted to answer that question.
After popping the kernels and drenching them with copious amount of butter and salt, just the way Finn liked it, Kurt headed back down to the basement.
"Once more, you opened the door," he sang as he descended down the stairs, but he stopped when he heard giggling.
"Just one more time man," Sam said, and then they were both giggling like school children again.
"Alright, now what are you two doing?" Kurt asked as he came around the corner. Both boys were now sitting right in front of the TV, faces mere inches away from the screen. He looked at the screen and saw that they had rewound to the part where Jack "drew her like one of his French girls." In other words, they were staring at her naked boobs. Over and over again.
"Culture is wasted on you two," Kurt sighed as he sat himself back down. Eventually, the lure of food (barely) beat out the lure of breasts and they sat down again, munching on the popcorn.
All three of them were mostly silent for the rest of the film, as the love story turned into calamity and sadness. Then it ended with the old lady dying and going to Titanic-heaven. Kurt belted out "My Heart Will Go On" one final time as it played during the credits, and then it was all over.
"So," Kurt said as he wiped the tears from his eyes, "you boys crying?"
He looked over at Sam, who was rubbing his eye with his fist. "No, I've just got an eyelash in my eye," He kept rubbing as he added, "I think it's gonna take a while to get it out. Like, a few hours."
Kurt just smirked and rolled his eyes as he turned to look at Finn "And how about y-?"
He didn't get top finish his question because Finn had grabbed him and pulled him into his own broad chest. He leaned his head onto Kurt's shoulder and started sobbing heavily.
"There there Finn, it's ok," Kurt said as he patted his large brother on the back.
"But…they were so in love…and then he…and all those people…" Finn said between sniffles.
"Would some warm milk make it better?" Kurt asked softly.
Finn nodded, "Yes please."
"Ok, let's go get some. And I'll rub your feet before we go to bed," Kurt offered as he took Finn by the hand and led him towards the staircase. "Goodnight Sam," he added, smiling at the blond teen.
"Later man," Finn said with a curt nod, still trying to remain manly while there were tears streaming down his face. Sam returned the manly, yet wet, gesture as the two brothers left. Once he could no longer hear Finn's stomping footsteps, he settled himself into bed. Then he got up, went to the bathroom, took the box of Kleenex that was in there and set it on the endtable beside his mattress and settled in again. It was one really stubborn eyelash.
"C'mon Kurt, its movie time!" Sam said, rather overenthusiastically.
"One second," Kurt said as he trimmed a flower from the bouquet in front of him, "I just need to finish this arrangement for Carole's -"
"Second's up," Sam replied as he grabbed one of Kurt's arms and one of his legs and hoisted the smaller teen onto his own shoulders.
"Sam, what are you – put me down! At least go slower! Y'know, never run while carrying a kid holding scissors!"
Sam ignored Kurt's protests, carried him down the stairs and then dumped him onto the bed, where Finn was already sitting.
"Did he kidnap you too?" Kurt whispered as Sam started getting the movie ready.
"He said he'd deflate my footballs. All of them!" Finn replied quietly.
Kurt handed the scissors over to his big brother and hissed, "Put these somewhere he can't find them,"
Finn took them and slipped them under the cloth that was covering the endtable, pulling his hand back out just as Sam turned around, beaming.
"You ready guys?" He asked.
"Yeah, totally," Finn answered.
"So excited," Kurt added.
"Awesome!" Sam said as he sat down on the other side of Kurt and hit Play.
Now, the Hudmel brothers did enjoy this movie, but really it was more of an experience to watch Sam instead. The blonde jock almost seemed to be in a trance, he was so absorbed by it. He would speak along with the dialogue – in both English and Na'vi. He would swing his arms about, mimicking Jake's combat moves. He cried a little when Grace and Trudy died. He took Kurt's hand in both of his and recited Jake's romantic speech to Neytiri. He lightly punched Finn's shoulder when he recanted the part where Jake and Tsu'tey confirmed they were bros. He shook with rage and despair when the Tree was destroyed. And when it was all over, he lay flat down onto the bed, exhausted. He got so engaged with the movie that he barely had any energy left.
"Wasn't that great?" He asked the other two, his already large mouth formed into a massive smile.
"Yeah, awesome!" Finn replied with almost too much enthusiasm.
"It was certainly a spectacle," Kurt added, keenly aware of the bump in the tablecloth. And hoping that Sam wasn't.
"Cool," Sam said weakly as he rolled onto his back, and then drifted off to sleep.
"Dude, let's get out of here!" Finn hissed through his teeth.
"Right behind you!" Kurt replied as he slipped his hand under the cloth and retrieved his scissors.
The two boys tiptoed out of the room and up the stairs as carefully as they could, leaving Sam to dream of forest planets and blue people.
It was a few days later, and the sun was shining brightly as Finn and Sam were hanging out in front of the school, waiting for Kurt so they could go home together.
The soprano eventually came excitedly running through the front doors, clutching some papers in his hand.
"I got an A on my paper!" He shouted as he approached his two roommates.
"I got a C on my last paper," Finn said.
"A C? Oh Finn you're improving!" Kurt said, wrapping his arms around Finn's waist. Finn returned the congratulatory hug.
"So, what did you write about?" Sam asked.
Kurt began to blush a little and looked at the ground, mumbling his response.
"The effect Ellen Ripley had on feminism," he said.
"Oh really?" Finn asked, grinning like an idiot. "I thought they were 'a bunch of mindless killing movies.'"
"They are!" Kurt snapped back, "They just have a semi-interesting protagonist."
"Hey guys, can we get going now?" Sam asked, before adding with a suave grin, "I need to get ready for my date tonight."
"Ooh, Sammy's getting some action tonight!" Finn teased as the three boys began walking towards the parking lot.
"Mercedes finally came around huh?" Kurt asked, "What did you do to get through to her?"
"It was easy!" Sam answered, "I just pulled her into an empty classroom, sat her down, and sang 'My Heart Will Go On.' She melted like butter."
"How romantic," Kurt sighed, staring off into space.
"Could you help me figure out what to do with my hair?" Sam asked, running a hand through his golden locks.
"Of course!" Kurt replied. He was surprised Sam even had to ask.
"Actually, I was kinda hoping you could help me get ready, Kurt," Finn piped in.
"With what? Are you going out with Rachel?"
"Actually, I sorta got another job," he replied.
"Doing what?" Sam asked, curious.
"Well, I got hired to dress up like a Na'vi and entertain at a kid's birthday party."
Kurt couldn't help but let out a giggle, "Really?"
"Yeah, the dad saw how tall I was and said I'd be perfect for it."
"Dude," Sam said, putting a hand on Finn's shoulder, "That is so, so cool."
"Well," Kurt said, "it looks like our 'Movie Night Extravaganza' was a hit."
"I'll say," Sam added. He wrapped an arm around both of the other guys' shoulders as they walked to Finn's truck.
"So, How about this weekend we do Quentin Tarantino?"
Fin.
^See what I did there?
Review away, if you people aren't sick of my same old fics yet. Although I am currently working on a Tina fic, too. ;)
Thanks for your time!