Call Me Maybe

A/N: I'm taking a break from my drabbles to do this one shot that has been in my head for a little while. It's inspired by the song of the same name by Carly Rae Jepsen, and I just had to write it down. I really hope you enjoy this humorous story.

Disclaimer: The TMNT and all related characters are property of Nickelodeon Studios. I only own the plot, Aubree Hennigan, and Kelsey Larson.

Summary: Mikey seeks Aubree's help after he gives a girl he rescued his phone number. Can Aubree help him out of this pickle before it's too late?

Sometimes I feel like my life is less than interesting on certain days when everything goes wrong. But then I often remember that my life is interesting because of the company I keep. After all, how many people can say that they're good friends with four talking turtles and a talking rat? Not many, that's for sure. But I count myself lucky that I do know them on some days, while on others I often wish I could have a normal life without all of the drama.

That was the way I felt one particular night. I had just gotten off of work and was ready to sit down and watch some wrestling when I was interrupted by a frantic tapping on my window. I hurried to open it and found Michelangelo on my fire escape. His eyes were full of panic, and I could tell that something was wrong.

"You gotta help me, Aubree!" he cried as he entered my living room before I could even invite him in. "I did something horrible! Well, I don't think it's so horrible, but Leo and the others do."

"What, did you prank them again?" I asked him. Mikey was often dramatic about these things and often visited me when his pranks had gone too far to seek comfort. He always knew that the guys wouldn't kill him when he was with me.

"No, something much worse," he answered.

"Okay, but what could be worse than you pulling a prank?" I asked him.

"Well, it all started like this…," he began and proceeded to tell me the story.

22222

The Lair was unusually quiet for the most part on this night. Splinter was meditating, Leo and Raph were sparring, Don was in his lab, and Mikey was on the couch watching TV. The sound wasn't up too loud because Mikey knew that Splinter need to concentrate when he was meditating. But the unusual quiet of the Lair was broken by the ringing of Mikey's Shell Cell.

"Talk to the Turtle," Mikey said as he answered it. "Oh, hey, Kelsey, how's it going? No, you didn't catch me at a bad time."

This conversation was interrupted as Raph and Leo exited the dojo. Both Turtles were a bit confused as they weren't sure who was calling Mikey. Not many others besides themselves had access to the Shell Cells, a precaution that was taken to protect their whereabouts as well as their identity. But here Mikey had given someone his own number, and it wasn't anyone they knew.

"Mikey, who the shell are you talkin' to?" Raph demanded.

"Oh, hang on, Kels," Mikey said. He turned to his red-clad brother. "I'm talking to Kelsey," he said. "I saved her two days ago and gave her my number so she could talk to me."

"Wait, you gave a strange girl your number?" Leo asked incredulously.

"Well, yeah, she seemed kind of lonely, so I gave her my number and asked her to call me sometime. Besides, she wasn't a stranger after she introduced herself to me."

The effect of these words was instantaneous. Leo's rage began building, and he gave his brother a very hard glare. Mikey cowered under the stare for he knew he was in big trouble with the leader.

"Do you have any idea how much danger you've put us in?" Leo hissed in a whisper. "How many times have we told you not to give out your number to any strangers? For all you know, she could be working for the Purple Dragons or even Bishop."

"Dude, she's not in the Purple Dragons," Mikey reassured him. "I made sure to check for a tattoo before I talked to her. Plus, she was being harassed by them anyway. And what would Bishop want with her? He has no use for hot chicks like her. She's just some lonely girl who needs a friend to talk to. She doesn't have any friends, Leo."

Leo couldn't believe his brother. How stupid was he? Before Mikey could say one more word, Leo had snatched the phone away from his brother in one swift movement.

"Hey!" Mikey protested, but Leo danced out of his reach.

"Excuse me, Kelsey, this is Mikey's brother," Leo told her. "I think there's been a mistake. Please make sure you tear up the phone number and delete it from your phone if you have it saved."

"Listen, Buster, I don't know who you think you are, but you're crossing a line here," Kelsey answered. "Mikey is my soulmate, and you have no right to keep him from me."

"Soulmate?" Leo repeated. "You just met him two days ago. You can't be in love that fast."

"Oh, but I can," Kelsey protested. "It's love at first sight. We were destined to be together as we have so much in common. Mikey told me about how you guys tease him and how he feels so alone in the world, just like me. My brothers tease me, too, and they often say I'm weak. Mikey said he could understand what that felt like because you guys do that to him, too."

"Oh, he did, did he?" Leo said, glaring at his little brother.

"Yes, and you really shouldn't tease him like that," Kelsey chastised. "Mikey is a wonderful person and should be treated with respect."

"Well, I'll have you know that we don't mistreat Mikey in any way," Leo reassured her. "In fact, he's pretty much spoiled rotten. I'm sorry if your brothers tease you, but I'm sure that they love you deep down."

"No, they don't!" Kelsey cried. "They hate me just like you guys hate Mikey."

"We don't hate him," Leo replied. "Look, just don't call here ever again, okay? It's not safe for you." And before Kelsey could even reply, Leo hung up on her.

"Leo, please don't be mad," Mikey begged. "I just wanted to be her friend, so I exaggerated a little. There's nothing wrong with that, right?"

Once again, Leo glared at Mikey, feeling like he wanted to explode. But before he could even do anything, Master Splinter had arrived on the scene.

"What is all of this about?" Splinter asked them.

Leo explained the whole story to his Sensei and wondered what the Rat was going to do to Mikey for his mistake. The old Rat was indeed angry at his son and showed it with his stern look and lashing tail.

"Michelangelo, you have been very foolish," Splinter began. "You are not to call this woman ever again. You know better than to give out your number to strangers. As for your punishment, you will do fifty flips for lying about your brothers, and you will write an essay on why it is dangerous for you to give out your number to strangers. Also, you are to go to this woman's home and tell her that this was all a mistake and that you cannot be friends with her any longer. The risks are too great, my son."

"But we're friends with April, Casey, and even Aubree," Mikey protested. "Why can't we have more friends?"

"Because the risks are too great, and not all humans are trustworthy," Splinter replied. "Now, you are to do as I say. Perhaps this will teach you a lesson about being too naïve."

Mikey pouted, but he knew he couldn't disobey his father. "Yes, Sensei," he replied. Then he decided to go to Aubree's and see if maybe she could help him with this little dilemma.

22222

"And, that's pretty much it, really," Mikey concluded.

"So, you want me to help you contact this woman to tell her that she can never see you again?" I confirmed.

Mikey nodded. "Yep, that's the deal," he said.

"Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt," I replied. "But you'd better not get into any other scrapes like this, okay?"

"I promise," Mikey answered.

"Good," I said. "So, what did you say to this woman after you rescued her?"

"I just said, 'Hey, this may sound crazy after I just met you, but here's my number. So, call me maybe if you get a chance.' Hey, it worked in that song by Carly Rae Jepsen."

I put a palm to my forehead. "Oh, great," I moaned. "You took the advice of a song? I'll never understand you, Mikey."

"Well, it was either that song, or I could've taken the Battle Shell out and let go of the steering wheel to see if Jesus would take it for me," Mikey answered. "It worked for that chick in that Carrie Underwood song."

I sighed. "Note to self: Take away Mikey's CDs so he can't get any ideas," I said quietly to myself.

"So, are we gonna go, or what?" Mikey asked me.

"Yes, let me look up her address," I told him. As soon as I found it, my heart sank. Her name was Kelsey Larson, and I used to go to school with her. She was always a ditz and often felt that she would get a boyfriend just by looking at the first hot guy who came her way. Needless to say, she went through many guys and all of them ended up breaking up with her. This definitely wasn't a good sign. "Do you have your disguise?"

"Yep, I sure do," Mikey said. He put on his trench coat and hat just before we set off.

"Good," I said. "At least you didn't forget that little detail."

I could tell Mikey felt bad about what he'd done because he kept apologizing to me all the way there. I simply told him that I wasn't the one he should be apologizing to in the first place. When we arrived at Kelsey's place, I could see Mikey was a bit nervous.

"Let me do the talking," I instructed him as I knocked on the door. He nodded and gave me a thumbs up.

Kelsey answered the door and did a double take when she saw me. "Aubree?" she asked.

"Yes, it's me," I said. "How are you, Kelsey?"

"Well, I was fine until some idiot decided he was going to take away my love," Kelsey replied.

"Yeah, about that," I began. "I think there's been a misunderstanding. You see, I know Mikey was trying to be nice, but he isn't your soul mate. In fact, he's already taken, so you'll have to look elsewhere for love."

"You mean he lied to me?" she asked incredulously.

"Yeah, I did," Mikey said. "I'm really sorry, Kelsey. I shouldn't have led you on like that. My brothers are really awesome, and they don't mistreat me at all. I just felt sorry for you, so I decided that maybe you needed someone to be your friend, so that's why I did what I did. I'm really sorry. Can you forgive me?" He gave his famous puppy dog look, but it didn't work on Kelsey. She slapped him across the face so hard his hat almost slipped off.

"How dare you lie to me like that?" she snarled. "I hate you. I'm going to tear up your number and delete it from my phone. You're a horrible person, Mikey, and I feel sorry for whoever is with you now."

"Well, don't worry because I'm going to give him a good talking to," I told her.

"Wait, you're the one he's with?" she asked incredulously.

"Yep," I answered. "Now, if you'll excuse us, we need to have a very long talk, don't we, Mikey?"

"Uh, yeah, we do," Mikey said sheepishly.

"Good," said Kelsey. "Well, I'll see you around, Aubree. Good luck."

"Thanks," I replied.

After Kelsey shut the door, I led Mikey back to my apartment. I could tell he was relieved that I'd saved him from that little disaster.

"Thanks a million, Aub," he said. "I don't know how I can repay for this."

"How about if you buy me a pizza?" I suggested.

He brightened. "That sounds like a plan," he said.

"Great and you'll be able to watch me eat it," I added with a smile.

"Wait, I can't have any with you?" he asked.

"Nope," I said my face serious. He looked a little crestfallen until I burst into laughter. "I'm just joking, Mike," I told him. "You can have some since you're so sorry. But you'd better not give your number to strange women anymore."

"I won't, Aub," he said. "Now, let's go get that pizza."

"Sure thing," I said. As I dialed the number for the pizza place, I couldn't help but smile at Mike's predicament. Sometimes I felt like their mother rather than a friend or a sister figure. Maybe it had something to do with my age, or maybe it just had to do with my experience of my own brothers. Whatever the reason, I was still happy to have them as my friends because at least they could come to me if they were ever in a pickle. And besides, no matter how crazy my friends were, I knew they'd always return the favor in some way. That was just the way it worked, and this time the favor turned out to be a four cheese pizza. Yeah, I was definitely lucky, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

A/N: Not the best ending, but it was the best I could do. I just had to write this down after listening to the song. I know Mikey may have seemed OOC here, but I can see him doing something like this on a whim. It just sounds like something he'd do. Anyway, this little story is dedicated to notawordsmith as I heard she was feeling under the weather. I hope this little story makes you feel better, Smithy. Get well soon! Feel free to leave a review, and have a shelltastic day.