I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, Naruto, InuYasha, Full Metal Alchemist, and One Piece.
Road Trip
By:
CrazyGirlOfManyNames
Let me ask you the seven hundred and fifty thousand dollar question:
What do you get when you put Kurama, Uzumaki Naruto, Sesshomaru, Rin, Uchiha Itachi, Monkey D Luffy and Edward Elric in a mini-van seated for seven with no food and money only for the expensive gas going cross country in the United States of America for a vacation?
Let me ask you the million dollar question now:
What do you get when you make Kurama the driver (who unsuspectingly has road rage), Ed the navigator (who has issues reading the map since Al usually does the directions), Naruto and Luffy sit in the second row (who are both loud and always hungry) and Itachi (who is trying to learn Braille and goes all emo like his foolish little brother on us), Sesshomaru (who wants to kill everyone in the van because he just wanted a simple vacation on the beach with his daughter) sit with Rin (who unfortunately starts to get moody—she hits puberty) sitting in the middle in the back row?
The answer to both these questions is THE MOST RANDOM AND USELESS STORY EVER! BOOYAH!
Of course they booked the vacation through the Kaiba Corp's Travel Agency in the Anime-verse. Naturally all them are cheap skates and decided to pay for the vacation as a group. They thought that they were going on a cruise to the Bahamas. Apparently not. So now with the whole van cursing Seto Kaiba to his death and funeral, Kurama is driving on the New Jersey Parkway southbound. Their first stop the Jersey shore.
"Okay we have to get off at exit, uh, 91, I think," said Ed, scratching his head, while reading a map. Of course that so happens to be the wrong exit.
"If you say so," said Kurama, calmly driving. Naruto and Luffy are occupied by telling each other stories of their adventures. Sesshomaru looks like he is sleeping, but he is just meditating. Itachi is reading a Braille book, but cursing every two seconds. Rin is cuddled into Sesshomaru's side sleeping. She was promised that she was getting to go on some rides. Suddenly the van swerved and everyone was alert.
"What the fuck," yelled Naruto, jumping up from his seat sticking head outside the driver's window and flipped off a red Buick (cough-my-mom-cough).
"Naruto the language please," said Sesshomaru, covering Rin's ears.
"Sit down," demands Kurama.
"That lady just flipped us off," stated Ed, blankly.
"Shut up all of you or I'm killing you all," stated Itachi, going back to read his Braille book. A little while later, Luffy and Naruto were moaning about how hungry they were and then they started about how long the trip was taking.
"Are we there yet," asked Luffy.
"No," replied Kurama.
"Are you sure," asked Naruto.
"Yes I'm sure," said Kurama. A few minutes later, Luffy asked again. Ten minutes later Kurama's face was turning purple as he was gripping the steering wheel tightly. Itachi and Sesshomaru were watching, or listening in Itachi's case, amused. Ed was trying to get Kurama's attention but Kurama too preoccupied with regaining his calm.
"Kurama!"
"WHAT," snapped Kurama.
"You passed the exit," said Ed.
"SHIT," said Kurama.
"Kurama the language in front of Rin," said Sesshomaru, covering Rin's ears again.
"But don't worry that was the wrong exit I figured it out," said Ed. "The next exit is the one to Seaside Heights."
"RIDES," squealed Rin, giggling.
"YEAH," yelled Luffy, grinning.
"All of you go and die," said Itachi.
"Shut up drama queen," said Sesshomaru, tempted to roll his eyes at the PMS-ing Uchiha. Sesshomaru noted that Uchiha Itachi has as many mood swings as Kagome. An hour later they reached Seaside Heights. Luffy and Naruto went to get some food, while Sesshomaru took Rin on some rides. Kurama, Ed, and Itachi went to the arcades to play some games.
With Luffy and Naruto, they were scaring everyone in the restaurant that they went to eat. Luffy ordered five of everything while Naruto ordered two of everything then bitched about no ramen. The owners could not believe these odd-looking teenagers. Needless to say they have to shut down after Luffy and Naruto left because they ran out of food for the next month.
Rin was having the time of her life on the rides while Sesshomaru watched apathetically as usual. With the arcade group Itachi made every machine and glass thing in the arcade explode. Ed and Kurama were mortified and quickly grabbed Itachi and ran out. Ed went to find Luffy and Naruto, while Kurama dragged Itachi to find Sesshomaru and Rin to get out of here before they attracted anymore attention. Unfortunately some poor fool angered Sesshomaru by stepping on Rin's foot making her cry. Kurama and Itachi had to pull Sesshomaru from decapitating the man. Thus the group ran out of Seaside Heights, jumped into the car and headed to their next destination, New York City.
Most of the trip was good until they reached the bridge from Perth Amboy, NJ to Staten Island, NY, were they hit rush hour traffic to and from the city. There were about two accidents and people were rubbernecking (looking at the accident instead of paying attention to driving, which causes even more accidents). Kurama was driving and gripping the steering wheel angrily. Ed, Naruto, Luffy, Sesshomaru and Rin knew not to say a word when Kurama was in this mood. They were all there at an incident at the National Appreciation of Bishounen and Bishoujo, where Kurama flipped out on Hiei for spending all his money for the week again.
"What the hell is taking so long," muttered Itachi.
"There are accidents, Uchiha," said Kurama.
"Somebody is moody," said Itachi.
"NOT KNOW UCHIHA," snapped Kurama.
"When we get to the city I'm so using the Mangekyou Sharingan on your sorry ass," said Itachi, creepily.
"Oh yeah we'll see about that," said Kurama.
"Oh shit he's going to go Yoko Kurama on your ass," said Naruto. Inside his head, Kyuubi was giving Naruto ideas to give to Kurama to kill Itachi. Naruto started to take notes. This fight would be fun to watch. Suddenly beeping from behind them started, and Kurama stuck his head out the window and yelled 'I CAN'T GO FUCKING ANYWHERE YOU DOUCHEBAGS!'
Eventually they reached the Big Apple, where unfortunately they were spotted by a group of people from an anime convention and glomped. They decided it would be best for their health if they headed to Chicago there second to last stop on there road trip. So on the road to Chicago, Illinois, Kurama was calm, Itachi was sleeping, Sesshomaru and Ed wanted to kill Naruto and Luffy for singing, and Rin was sleeping.
"89 bottles of sake on the wall, 89 bottles of sake on the wall, take one down pass it around, 88 bottles of sake on the wall," sang Luffy and Naruto, horribly.
"FOR THE LOVE OF THE PHILOSPHER'S STONE AND ALL THAT'S PURE AND GOOD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP," snapped Ed.
"Thank goodness Rin is asleep," said Sesshomaru to himself. Suddenly Naruto, Luffy, and Ed felt a strange chill in the car.
"EVERYONE SHUT UP I'M TRYING TO SLEEP ON THIS VACATION FROM EVERYTHING," yelled Rin.
"Yes, ma'am," said Ed, Naruto and Luffy, jumping. They just knew that Rin was not in a good mood and when a girl isn't in a good mood they wind up hurt as their experiences with Winry, Sakura, Tsunade, Ino, Anko, Kurenai, and Nami.
"Good girl, Rin," said Sesshomaru.
"Thanks Sesshomaru-sama," chirped Rin, lovingly at her lord.
"This is why I'm asexual," grunted Itachi.
"This is why I bugged sensei not to pair me up with anyone in the series," said Kurama. Suddenly there was a crash. Kurama slammed the van into a station wagon. Only bad things could come from this…
Back in the anime-verse, anime characters all over the place were opening the newspaper to the front page with Kurama, Sesshomaru, Itachi, Naruto, Luffy, Ed and Rin under arrest for threatening a police officer with bodily harm. Hiei smirked, that fox deserved it. InuYasha spit out his breakfast at his brother under arrest. Sasuke jumped in joy and kissed Sakura for Naruto and Itachi were his biggest pains in the ass. Winry, Al, and Roy just hung their heads. And everyone pitied Rin.
End.
I said it was random…