A/N

Hello lovelies! Welcome to my first ever (posted) fan fiction!

I have written several, but I never really got the guts up to actually publish these bad boys, though I found this one the most fun to write, and the most humorous, so I figure, what the heck!

This is inspired, simply because I laugh the hardest when France makes a joke about America being hot and England freaks out. This will be the entire fic. I dunno if it's been done before or not, but I'll try to make it as original as possible!

I hope you at least laugh, though if this is proven to be lame and stuff, or no one likes it, I'll end up taking it off. So if you really like it and are going to want me to continue, I would love for you to review or follow or something, just to let me know you're there (:

This has some swears since Prussia's in it and all, so just to warn you! Also, suggestive content, 'cause France... and that's the reason for the T rating!

Maybe if I get good feedback for this I'll post some of my (thousands) of other fics!

Also, I apologize for the random unnecessary French in this chapter, but considering that I've only just started high school level French III, this is the best I've got xD

Without further adieu, please enjoy this fanfiction!

After the disclaimer:

I do not own Hetalia

Cleaning out anything is a naturally boring affair. One seems to always get distracted by the items they find, and cease to continue what they originally set out to accomplish. This normally occurs when one finds something that they had lost, as they in turn, get swept away from their responsibilities in blissful memories.

Even countries aren't exceptions to this rule.

"Honhonhon~ Look at this! Très magnifique!"

A certain nation was currently in in corner of his attic, curled up into a ball whilst giggling like a schoolgirl with bubble tape. Only seductively. This person in particular, had stumbled upon a simple leather bound book, written by his own hand. All that was in said book, were names of other countries, along with seemingly random dates. To the untrained eye, this book would seem like nothing more then a birthday reminder, or even a schedule planner. However, once you learn that this is France's book, all innocent assumptions fly out the window.

"I cannot believe I still have this!" He kicked his feet out and wiggled them in delight. Yet, the book came to a sudden stop! This was definitely not up to date! "Un stylo! I must have a pen somewhere!" He quickly reached into his pocket and excitedly pulled out the writing utensil, scribbling down more names in a hast.

"When was that again? Oh right! And...oui, oui." He muttered as he wrote the names, trying to recall all of the new countries he needed to add. Once finished, he scanned over the new nations a few times more, before breaking out into an insanely creepy grin. "Parfait." He hugged the book close.

"I've done it! Haven't I? Every single one!" He cackled his original laugh, and pulled the book away from his body, opening it once more. He reread the beautiful list one more time, sighing contently. "I simply cannot banish you to storage now can I, mon petit chouchou? Non! You will stay right by my side until I can show you to Espagne et Prusse!"

"France? Are you done up there yet?" France cringed as he heard his boss call. He hadn't realized just how long he had spent reminiscing with his book when he should have been cleaning.

"Une minute!" He yelled back, stuffing the book into his back pocket and frantically moving several dusty boxes into neater stacks.

"Oh no way! This is priceless!" Prussia bellowed. He was currently holding the old brown book, laughing at it's content.

"Props to you, I never thought anyone could do it!" Spain said, blinking away his surprise.

"Oui, I expected you two to forget about this. And of course, you're both absent. Otherwise it would just be très bizarre!" France's grin had not left his face. "I expect neither of you completed yours, correct?"

"No one's as big a whore as you Francis."

"Si, I forgot about mine centuries ago."

"Then I suppose you two know what this means?" Frances waggled his eyebrows. "I am the King of the Bad Touch!"

"You're still not as awesome as me."

"I would like to say that bet expired, but mi amigo, this is impressive!" Spain said, leaning over the book to catch another glimpse, as Prussia was hogging it, trying desperately to find a major absence.

"Yeah man, this is insane. You gotta have missed someone." Prussia muttered. "I mean, besides impossible countries like Spain's little bitch, and that leek-teen-stine or whatever." He continued to flip through the pages madly.

"Non, everyone's there. Look as long as you want, you won't find any errors."

"But I'm definitely the awesome leader of this group! You can't take this away from me!" Prussia complained without removing his eyes from the book. Apparently, extremely determined.

"You are not the leader! Nor were you ever!"

"Sure as hell wasn't you!"

"Romano is not my perra!" Spain finally put two and two together and realized who Prussia was implying.

"Well I am the King now." France said with a devious smile, that only succeeded in making Prussia's scowl increase.

"Just because you out sluted us shouldn't mean- ... hang on." Prussia immediately flipped to the beginning of the book again.

"I am truly the country of l'amour, Prusse. Give it up." France said, disregarding the blank expression the Prussian suddenly acquired as he began to read more intently.

"How did you find this anyway?" Spain asked, scratching his head.

"I was cleaning out my attic and I stumbled upon it."

"And you had everyone you didn't have before?"

"Oui. Every country we associate ourselves with."

"You're crazy." Spain said, shaking his head with an amused smile.

"I GOT IT!" Prussia yelled suddenly. Making the two unsuspecting countries jump. "I knew it! You missed someone! Kesesese~"

"I did not! Third world, and illogical countries do not count!"

"This guy's definitely neither."

"Who is it?" Spain piped up, trying to take the book from Prussia who would not allow it.

"Kesese! You're an idiot! How do you miss him!"

"Who Prusse?!"

"Mein Gott, you even have Canada whoever that is!"

"...Who?" Spain tilted his head.

"PRUSSE!"

"You fucking missed America!"

France paused. He would have protested, he should have, but he couldn't. He racked his brain desperately for any recollection of getting America. Nothing. He was fairly sure he would have remembered the muscular young country. Unless they were drugged or something. How could he have missed America!?

"No way!" Spain said, laughing "So much for King, eh?" He elbowed France lightly with a smile.

"YEAH! Look for yourself! I guess he's just so obvious we didn't think to look for him." Prussia said, handing Spain the book who quickly ran through it.

"Mon Dieu... Amérique?"

"Your right! He's not in there!" Spain confirmed.

"He's so stupid too! How could you not trick him into it!" Prussia laughed his own original laugh.

"Shut up! I-I could get him in one week!"

"A week? Isn't that a little too over confident if you haven't after all this time?" Spain teased.

"Non! I know I can! I just forgot about him or something!"

"How 'bout this Frenchie." Prussia smiled deviously. "You can have two weeks to trick America into the sack, and if you do, you can still be the king or whatever. But if you don't, this trio is mine!"

"That is fine." France was positive it would take him two to three days to get the boy, so that was perfect. "I'll have no problems."

"Oh really?" Prussia raised an eyebrow.

"Oui, I can't think of anything that will get in the way besides you two, or maybe-" France paused. Oh merde. France now remembered how he completely overlooked the attractive boy. Every attempt had been throttled.

"Don't tell England." France begged.