(Scene: The crew on the bridge, as usual. Kirk looks macho, Spock looks
thoughtful, McCoy looks irked, Uhura looks cute, Scotty is somewhat there,
Sulu looks tense, and Chekov just is... there.)
Kirk: Anyone there?
Uhura: All quiet, sir.
Kirk: *frowns* That's odd.
Spock: *puzzled* Why is it odd, Jim?
Kirk: Because the Hollywood Rulebook says so! *holds a very thick black book and waves it about madly*
Spock: Fascinating.
McCoy: *concerned* You alright, Jim?
Kirk: I'm spiffing, Bones, why should I be? I'm the macho captain! *as if on cue, begins to cough*
Chekov: Macho, vy arse.
Kirk: *cough* Spock, you *cough* have the *cough* conn.
(Kirk leaves with McCoy in tow. Spock moves to the side of Kirk's chair and appears thoughtful once more.)
Scotty: *quietly* Why can't he be our captain? At least he doesn't go after girls right and left.
Uhura: Sir! We're receiving a transmission!
Spock: On speakers.
Speakers: Hello, my dear old friend.
Spock: *raises an eyebrow* Who is this?
Speakers: *irritably* Put me on the frickin' screen, Mr. Spock, so I may see you all.
Sulu: Should I.?
Spock: Yes.
(Kahn appears on the screen! All crew members GASP dramatically, and then stop acting like this is a soap opera and merely gape.)
Chekov: But. but you're dead!
Kahn: Shut up. The author brought me back so I may. terrorize you once more.
Scotty: *truthfully* Well, I'm not very terrified.
Kahn: You WILL BE! *evil laughing* Prepare to meet thy doom, Enterprise!
(He clicks off the screen with a REMOTE. The door suddenly starts to wobble dangerously, and something repeatedly slams into it.)
Uhura: What will we do? *faints*
(Everyone looks helpless. The door suddenly slams open.)
Annoying Narrator: What will happen next?! Find out NEXT TIME! .I'm going to ask for a raise.
Kirk: Anyone there?
Uhura: All quiet, sir.
Kirk: *frowns* That's odd.
Spock: *puzzled* Why is it odd, Jim?
Kirk: Because the Hollywood Rulebook says so! *holds a very thick black book and waves it about madly*
Spock: Fascinating.
McCoy: *concerned* You alright, Jim?
Kirk: I'm spiffing, Bones, why should I be? I'm the macho captain! *as if on cue, begins to cough*
Chekov: Macho, vy arse.
Kirk: *cough* Spock, you *cough* have the *cough* conn.
(Kirk leaves with McCoy in tow. Spock moves to the side of Kirk's chair and appears thoughtful once more.)
Scotty: *quietly* Why can't he be our captain? At least he doesn't go after girls right and left.
Uhura: Sir! We're receiving a transmission!
Spock: On speakers.
Speakers: Hello, my dear old friend.
Spock: *raises an eyebrow* Who is this?
Speakers: *irritably* Put me on the frickin' screen, Mr. Spock, so I may see you all.
Sulu: Should I.?
Spock: Yes.
(Kahn appears on the screen! All crew members GASP dramatically, and then stop acting like this is a soap opera and merely gape.)
Chekov: But. but you're dead!
Kahn: Shut up. The author brought me back so I may. terrorize you once more.
Scotty: *truthfully* Well, I'm not very terrified.
Kahn: You WILL BE! *evil laughing* Prepare to meet thy doom, Enterprise!
(He clicks off the screen with a REMOTE. The door suddenly starts to wobble dangerously, and something repeatedly slams into it.)
Uhura: What will we do? *faints*
(Everyone looks helpless. The door suddenly slams open.)
Annoying Narrator: What will happen next?! Find out NEXT TIME! .I'm going to ask for a raise.