A.N. I don't know if this makes sense, I wrote it at three in the morning. I'm too tired to care. If you find any mistakes, tell me and I'll fix them. I'm sorry for whatever this is.
I don't own it.
Green scowled as he looked over the battlefield, his mind hard at work. This match had gone on for far to long. Green had easily defeated all of his opponent's Pokémon. Well, all but one; the very one that was causing him so many problems right now.
The challenger was a youngster from some region that had just recently been brought to Green's attention; maybe Unova or Kalos. Regardless, the only Pokémon he owned that Green hadn't blown through was his Togekiss. The infernal creature was still hanging on, despite Green's best attempts to knock it off.
As far as Green could tell, the only stat that she had over his own Pokémon was speed, but that was quite a problem when she kept using moves like Sweet Kiss and Attract. And yes, "she" was accurate. Green recalled that female Togekiss were supposed to be rare, even in places like Sinnoh, but here in Kanto they were practically unheard of. Not that it mattered now of course. Green regretted not having more female and genderless Pokémon on his team.
Inevitably, one after another, Green's prized Pokémon fell, still sporting that desiring gleam in their eye whenever they looked at their opponent. If Green didn't have his usual mask of stoicism, he would've yelled in frustration. Eventually, Green was left with only a paralyzed Charizard. (It had been Nuzzled earlier. Yet another move that he wasn't familiar with.) Yet he saw light at the end of the tunnel. The youngster had finally run out of hyper potions, (It had been never-ending!) and the Togekiss was looking worn down. One more blow would end this, assuming Charizard could move and attack through infatuation and confusion.
"Charizard; Flamethrower!" called Green, always the confidant gym leader. Tokekiss landed another air slash before Charizard could respond. Charizard shuddered, looked up at Togekiss with that stupid moony love-struck expression, opened its mouth….. and promptly burned itself and keeled over. Green continued to scowl as he crossed the battlefield to deliver the Earth badge to the celebrating trainer.
Afterwards, Green pondered over the texts on Pokémon moves he had dug out.
Sweet Kiss: The user kisses the target with an angelic cuteness that causes confusion.
Why? Why would the unproductive act of kissing confuse Pokémon? Green might be able to understand why it could be that way with other people's Pokémon, but he had trained his team to be virtually unstoppable. The act of kissing an enemy shouldn't have thrown them off!
Attract: If it is of the opposite gender of the user, the target becomes infatuated and less likely to attack.
Yet again, a move he didn't understand. Plenty of girls had tried to bag him in the past (becoming a gym leader hadn't helped) but he had never been left unable to act. What caused such a reaction in his Pokémon?
Nuzzle: The user attacks by nuzzling its electrified cheeks against the target. This also leaves the target with paralysis.
At least this one made some sense, if the user's cheeks were electrified. Aside from the fact that it causes paralysis, it still didn't seem like an efficient way to attack an enemy.
Green was rudely awakened from his ponderings, however, by a large crash coming from the back of the gym. Scowling, (surprise, surprise) Green strode toward the clamor's source.
In a broom cupboard near the back door, Green found a female brunette with a white hat stuffing a bag full of pokeballs. His pokeballs, with his Pokémon.
"Blue, what are you doing in here?" Green asked, exhaustion and irritation apparent in his voice. The girl looked up, a brilliant smile on her face.
"Green, sweetie, there you are! I was wondering when you would show up! Want to lend a hand?" she said as she tried to stuff Alakazam's pokeball into the already bulging bag. Green raised an eyebrow.
"I'm supposed to help you steal my own Pokémon?" Blue looked up, severe hurt written on her face.
"Green, I'm surprised at you! I would never steal Pokémon." Green was about to point out that she was already guilty of this when she continued. "I heard about a Pokémon raising contest in Lavender Town where the winner gets 500000 Pokedollars! Since you're so good at leveling Pokémon up, I decided to borrow a couple of them. Since I know this place so well; I just decided to find them myself and not bother you. I knew you wouldn't mind!" Blue batted her eyelashes heavily for the last couple of lines. Green's eyebrows tried to touch the sky.
"If you knew I wouldn't mind, why are you hiding back here?" Blue waved her hand.
"I'm not hiding, this is a very public part of the gym."
"This is a storage closet I never use, in a part of the gym I never go to." Green replied.
"Well how could I be expected to know that?" Blue asked, swinging her bag over her shoulders.
"You just claimed to know this place well."
"Pfft. Green, nobody remembers details. By the way, what are you reading?" Blue reached over and snatched the book from Green's hand. Despite his attempted interventions, Blue managed to glance at the pages he had marked. "Gee, Green," she said with barely contained laughter. "I wouldn't have guessed these as your preferred battle strategies."
Green gritted his teeth and snatched the book back. "I'm not looking for battling techniques." he ground out.
"Oh, I see. So it's personal advice you're seeking, huh? You know, normally I'd say that anyone who looks through a Pokémon move encyclopedia for help attracting a partner must be pretty bad off, but you don't really fit the stereotype. If you needed help, you should've just come to me! I'm sure with a face like yours, I could get you a girlfriend in no time!"
Green gaped at her, his mind barely comprehending the stupidity issuing from her mouth.
"Don't look too shocked Green, I'm serious. I think you have a chance, or you would at least if you started paying attention to a certain someone instead of nonstop training. And you know, needing help is nothing to be ashamed of."
"I was trying to understand how these moves work!" Green hissed. Blue glanced at the book now in Green's hands.
"Seems pretty self-explanatory." Blue smirked.
"What I mean is, why do these stimulus cause these reactions?"
"Well I would be happy to teach you that, Green." Green opened his mouth to respond, but suddenly found he couldn't because Blue was much to close for comfort, and was rubbing her cheek against his neck while her arms wrapped around his back. Green couldn't move. He honestly couldn't. He could feel Blue's breath on his neck, causing goose bumps on the skin. Green's brain started focusing on things he had never (consciously anyways) noticed before, like the aurora of color that was Blue's eyes as they gazed up at him, the length of her lashes, the scent of her skin, the softness of her hair, the shape of her body…. Green's whole brain was wracked with sensory overload. Then something astounding happened. Green felt something soft brush his lips. It was only a brief sensation, but it resonated within him for a very long time.
After Green's brain finally worked out what the #$%! had happened, he regained his senses and found….. an empty room. Which meant no Blue, and no Blue's bag. Snapped out of whatever was left of last minute's euphoria by this thought, Green strode cursing toward the door.
Charizard watched its trainer stalk out the door after the giggling girl with the blue eyes and snorted. And Green had given him a hard time.