In the Van Man

As Lindsay looked out the window of the VW bus gazing at the landscape, she wondered if she was going to get away with the lie she told her parents. She sighed and visually took in the various fields of livestock and the buildings of the small towns the small bus putted through. She looked over at a sleeping Kim whose blonde hair was wafting in the wind as she rested her head on the door frame of the window of the front passenger seat, trying to stay cool. Kim always seemed so energetic and ballsy. But the hot summer of 1981 was getting to her, and the bus had no air conditioning. The heat of the South and the Midwest is different than the heat in Michigan. Thank God for the swimsuits and shorts they bought from some roadside vendor. Although they were in light clothes, the heat still made beads of sweat form and dried out mouths. This made Kim moodier than usual. Therefore a dead silence echoed in the van, because no one wanted to set Kim off for any reason. The other reason for the silence was because they had the dates off, and the Dead weren't beginning their tour again until July 2nd in Houston. Not June 2nd. Idiots...

Now their little adventure had turned into a road trip to Canada. Lindsay lamented to herself that she just had to be adventurous and free willing, she couldn't have just waited to check the facts before trusting the hold-over hippies Laurie and Freddie. After being on the road with them for five days, Lindsay took inventory of her newfound friends and her old ones.

Lindsay remembered how Laurie had been in their freshman and sophomore year. Very smart and uptight at times, she was a cheerleader and a young Republican. Then Laurie broke her ankle and wrist at a homecoming game while doing a somersault, and it changed her. Over the next couple years, she quit all of the activities she was in and became what she is today.

Lindsay looked over at Laurie's petite figure sleeping on the van's floor without a care in the world, snoring away and smiling at the same time. Then Lindsay looked to Freddie driving the van. He had a stern look on his face, eyes affixed to the road diligently. His beard was insanely bushy and his hair was long. He looked similar to Jesus but much skinnier, if that is even possible.

Lindsay remembered him from freshman year. Freddie was obsessed with Star Wars. A few times he dressed as Luke Skywalker, as if it was his everyday wear. He drew a Darth Vader helmet on his locker and his then-girlfriend wore Leia's side buns. His obsession seemed to stop when he was suspended for a few weeks because he hit Mr. Kowchevski in the face with a lightsaber by accident-at least, probably it was an accident. This implemented the rule of no costumes at school, as if that rule was needed. At that time Lindsay was too afraid to even talk to him; her focus was Mathletes and church. Wow, times have changed.

Freddie and Laurie began going out at the beginning of junior year and slowly transitioned into dead heads. Lindsay thought to herself, "That's what the music does to you, it changes you mentally and spiritually". People who are looking to come out of their shells discover that they are more than grades, friends, school clubs, or cultural anomalies.

Just then Lindsay heard Kim rustle awake. "Hey Loser!" she yelled at Freddie.

"What, Man!?," he snapped at Kim as he was pulled out of the hypnosis of driving.

"Why the hell are we in Missouri?! That sign just said 'Welcome to Missouri'!" Kim yelled.

"We are lost man, just lost," Freddie chuckled.

Laurie snickered as she lay on the floor of the van. Lindsay ducked her head down and smiled and pretended to pick at the bright blue shag carpeting on the van's floor.

"The plan is to go to Canada, score some weed, and come back and be in a daze for the rest of the summer. An' we need to take the quickest way back because my Mom thinks I am at the geek summit with the brain back there."

"Hey you decided to tag along, Brain," said Lindsay

"Little woman, I earned this trip-Daniel is a working asshole and I worked my ass off to get A's and pass my classes. An' my bitch of a Mom can now focus on her baby boy and fat-ass husband," Kim growled. "I need to meet someone other than Daniel, there is no one in Chippewa, so bored with his ass. GOD I HATE THIS HEAT!"

"Hey you got a guy right here," snorted Freddie as he grabbed Kim's left arm.

"You're barking up the wrong tree, Mac. Don't touch me, and take a bath!" Kim scoffed.

"Woof," said Freddie.

Lindsay heard a chuckle from Laurie again. "Hey Kim, that's my man meat, but I can share if you are willing to trade for Daniel," said Laurie.

"No thanks, and I will give you Daniel for free. Watch out, he is dumb as a box of rocks" scoffed Kim again.

"We can throw in Nick as well, two for one," Lindsay interjected.

All four began to laugh at the mere thought.

"Oh my God, Nick and Daniel, dumb and crazy," Kim laughed. "I can't believe all of the lies I had to tell just to be alone with Daniel. The boinking wasn't even worth it, couldn't even feel it." Kim thrust her hips, "Hump, hump, sleep, blech!"

"Ugh! Gnarly info!" shouted everyone else in the van at Kim, along with a boisterous laugh.

Lindsay began to remember the incredible lie Kim told her mother. She couldn't believe Kim's Mom bought yet another ruse. Kim didn't particularly care for the band itself, but it was good to have her along since Lindsay didn't really know Laurie and Freddie. Lindsay remembered Kim's well-crafted lie: she said that she wanted to learn more about the Law program at the University of Michigan. And that she needed to go with Lindsay, because she had a free room in the dorms. Kim's Mom reluctantly agreed; a part of Lindsay and Kim was suspicious on how easily her Mom bought it. This made Lindsay's stomach turn-maybe they would be set up, and grounded for eternity when they made it back home.

However, since January Lindsay noticed Kim's Mom had laid off of her. This was after the period when Kim was mad at Lindsay because Kim's Mom told Lindsay's parents Kim was a dumb slut, in so few words. The confrontation seemed to motivate Kim to go to class and take school more seriously, since she didn't want to be seen as a "dumb slut." Kim's Mom seemed to be more attentive to her brother and stepfather over the following months, and the lack of attention made Kim feel alone. Kim confided in Lindsay about this around April. Kim's Mom didn't even check with Lindsay's parents for more information on the summit. Lindsay's parents had no clue she was with Kim and Lindsay wanted to keep it that way. The mere idea of her parents finding out made Lindsay's heart race. They tolerate Kim and her antics, but to sneak away and get caught with her. . . . All hell would break loose.

But maybe Kim's Mom gave up and changed her focus to people other than her baby girl, as Kim was nicknamed by her. Surprisingly, all her Mom asked was she at least check in once a day; maybe the crazy woman finally trusted her daughter. Lindsay's heart slowed and stomach calmed down a bit more as she continued to overanalyze.

Kim then shouted "Pull over at this next gas station! I have to call the wicked psycho of the West."

"Right Chief!" chuckled Freddie.

"Then I am driving, freaking hippie. You are still tripping hard off of those shrooms we got in Houston," said Kim reluctantly.

Lindsay's eyes widened.

"OH MY GOD PULL OVER! I have to puke!" shouted Lindsay.

In the back of her mind as she leaned over the bushes on the side of the road as Kim held back her long brown hair, Lindsay wondered what everyone else was doing at home while she was on this long, and dangerous strange-trip…