Grissom pulled me to the hallway after I went nuts on a suspect in the interrogation room. I was sheaving with anger shaking looking in at the man talking to Brass.
"Hey!" Grissom said, making me look at him. "What is wrong with you?"
"That man beat his wife!"
"You think anger and violence is the solution?" He asked
"You heard what he said!" I said
"I want you to go outside and take in some air." He said "Now!"
I glared at him before going. He watched me go before going back in. I stood outside just trying to calm down. Sophia walked over to me touching my arm.
"You okay?"
"Yeah." I said
"Grissom just told me what happened."
"The guy deserves to rot!"
"Attacking him doesn't help the case."
"I know!"
She watched me walk away looking around. I came back in going to Grissom's office seeing him on the phone. He hung up sitting back in his chair.
"Are you in control now?"
"Yes, sorry."
"You should be. We almost lost the case."
I sighed nodding.
"Was there something else?" He asked
I looked at him nervous.
"Yes."
"What is it?"
"I know we broke up and everything, but…"
"You were the one that ended it, Sara." He said
"I know, but there is something we should talk about."
He raised his eyebrows waiting.
"I….am going to have a baby." I said
I watched him stand staring at me in surprise.
"A baby?"
"Yes."
"What am I supposed to do?" He asked
"I don't know, be happy." I said, scared.
"How long have you known?"
"A few days."
"We used protection."
"It didn't work."
He walked around the desk to face me.
"Sara, this is putting me in a spot."
"I'm sorry."
"I mean, I don't want to have a baby." He said
I flinched suddenly feeling alone.
"Then you don't. I will raise it without you." I said
"Sara, I can't just ignore the fact that I have a child."
We looked at each other in silence.
"You don't want to have a baby. Well I didn't either, but when I saw that I was it changed me and I did want it. This is happening with or without you." I said, before leaving. Grissom looked down leaning over his desk sighing. I wiped the tears from my face when I went through my door scared to death over something that hasn't been born yet.
The next shift I walked into the break room seeing Grissom walk in stopping as he looked at me. I walked over sitting on the couch rubbing my head hearing him moving about behind me. He walked over stopping as he held a file in one hand and a coffee mug in the other.
"How are you?" He asked
"Fine." I said, looking at him.
He nodded looking down at my stomach.
"Sara, I think we should talk more about this."
"Why?"
"I wondered if you thought of the options."
I put my arms over my stomach glaring at him.
"You want me to get rid of it?"
"No Sara, I just wanted to make sure you are aware."
I stood looking at him.
"I know what I could do, Grissom, but I am not destroying a life even if it was a mistake!"
Catherine came in seeing me push past her in anger.
"Wow, what is her problem?"
"I don't know." Grissom said, lying.
I avoided Grissom for a few weeks as morning sickness came part of my new routine. Then he had me accompany him on a case. I sat in the passenger seat looking head as he drove glancing at me then at my stomach. I looked over at him pulling my coat of my flat stomach. He sighed looking out again.
We walked to the scene in the shady side of town. I was comforted seeing a lot of police and Brass standing beside a dark run down house. The smell coming from inside made my stomach turn. I stopped as Grissom talked to Brass holding my stomach trying to think of something else.
"Sara, are you ready?" Grissom asked
I took a breath nodding. He nodded then turned going in. I walked in and it hit me.
"Breathe through your mouth." Grissom said
"The body must have been in here awhile." I said
"He's in the tub." Brass said, behind me.
We walked to another room then to a small bathroom where the bloated body of a man laid in dirty water. I went in then went out taking a breath. Grissom knelt down beside the tub not letting the overpowering smell get to him.
"It's hard to tell if it is a man or a woman." He said
"It's a man all right. I found his wallet. His name is Peter Gimble." Brass said
I came back in seeing Brass's coloring turning green like mine.
"If you don't mind. I think I will wait outside." He said, escaping.
"Grissom, can you call someone else to help you?" I asked
"I asked for you." He said
"Well I can't do this."
He stood looking over at me.
"Sara, the scenes are never pretty. You need to overcome the smell and work. Just because you're in a delicate condition does not mean I am letting you off."
"Fine." I said
He turned back to the body. I stood feeling sick and my body told me it wanted to throw up.
"Sara, would you hand me some gloves?"
I felt my eyes water then I bolted leaving him. He stood hearing me run out the door. Brass was talking to a neighbor as I ran out of the house going to a hedge throwing up. He came over watching as I dry heaved after losing the food I had eaten a while ago. I stood shaking wiping my mouth with my coat sleeve.
"Sara?"
"I'll be okay." I said, starting to go back at the house.
"Wait a minute." He said, holding onto my arm. "Just take some time."
I nodded as he reached for his ringing phone answering it.
"Brass."
I watched him look at the house then at me.
"Okay, I will."
He hung up shaking his head.
"Grissom is calling Nick in. He wants you off the case."
I looked back at the house then at him.
"I'll take you home."
"It's still shift."
"He said not for you."
I sighed letting him lead me away. I went home going to bed. Grissom did not call or visit which hurt.
Grissom saw me in the hallway a month later wearing a red tank top which accented my slender figure, but he could see the baby bump forming. My belly jutted out more than it had and I seemed to be getting over my morning sickness. I didn't notice him admiring me from afar. I put my hand over my bump as I looked at a paper outside of lab room I had been working in.
I looked over seeing Grissom looking at me. Then I walked the other way. He walked back to his office. I was in the locker room later thinking as I got my things to go home. Seeing Grissom watching me earlier made me think he was interested.
Sophia walked into his office seeing him sitting in his chair with his eyes closed listening to some music.
"Hey." She said
He opened his eyes smiling.
"Hey." He said, tired.
"You okay?" She asked, walking around his desk leaning back against it looking at him.
"I think so."
"So, what's the matter?"
He sighed looking at his desk then at her.
"I just have things to think about."
"Sounds tough being the boss."
"It can be."
"What do you say I take you out for dinner?"
"You don't have to."
"I want to."
"Then I accept." He said
She smiled watching him get his desk in order then stand looking at her.
"What?" He asked
"Nothing, you just look handsome in this light." She said, leaning over kissing him. He slowly put his hands on her waist.
I came in stopping. They moved back hearing me gasp as I slowly backed out running away. Sophia looked at Grissom as he looked at her.
I ran outside clutching my chest breathing fast not able to comprehend what was going on. Grissom came out without Sophia seeing me.
"Sara?"
I turned facing him putting my hands up to stop him.
"No….just stay away!"
"Let me explain." He said, coming forwards.
"No….just….!" I said, trying to breathe.
He watched me in silence as I looked at him.
"You….like….Sophia now?"
"Maybe." He said
I nodded becoming more upset.
"Sara, you broke up with me. Why are you upset?"
"I….don't know…I just…thought….you had…..feelings….for me!"
People came out of the building as I ran to the side leaning against the building wall. Grissom came over looking at me.
"Sara, I loved you, but you told me that you didn't want to be with me anymore. It hurt, but I moved on and now….you want me back."
I put my hand against my head breathing better.
"Am I right?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Please leave." I said
He pulled my hand away making me look at him. I felt tears slide down my cheeks.
"You do want me back."
I slowly nodded. He searched my eyes hearing me sniff.
"I broke up with you because I knew sometime you would get tired of me. I know it sounds silly, but every time I had something that was perfect it would always turn bad."
I wiped my cheeks looking at him as he stood in silence.
"I would never hurt you, Sara. When I said I loved you I meant it."
I nodded sniffing again.
He sighed letting me go.
"I need to think about this." He said
I nodded again watching him walk away.
Sophia sat on his couch with him beside her later. Her hand touched his leg as he jumped a little looking over at her.
"It's late and I am tired." She said
"Me to."
"You're distracted. When you invited me back here I thought we were going to do more than just sit here."
"What did you have in mind?"
"Something along the lines of fooling around."
"Okay."
She smiled getting up walking over to the hallway leading to the bedrooms seeing he was still sitting there.
"Gil, what's wrong?"
"I was thinking about Sara."
"Well that's a weird thought to have before going to bed with another woman."
He stood walking over to her.
"I'm sorry, why don't we skip this tonight and I'll take you home."
"What is bothering you about Sara?" She asked, taking his hand.
He looked down at their hands releasing hers.
"I love her."
I slept in bed moving around before stilling. I sat up touching my stomach breathing in and out after a bad dream. The doorbell went off as I sat there wondering who it could be. Grissom watched me open my door looking at him.
"Did I wake you?"
"I was awake." I said
He came in watching me shut the door looking at him.
"What can I do for you?" I asked
He walked over without talking and pulled me to him as his lips touched mine. I didn't lift up my arms around him as he did. My mind was blank of thoughts. All I wanted to do was hide inside him. He moved back opening his eyes looking at me.
"I love you." He said
"And the baby?"
"Yes."
I moved putting my arms around his back with my head against his shoulder closing my eyes. He closed his eyes breathing in my scent.
We went to bed holding each other. When I woke he was leaning his head up with his hand touching my baby bump with the other. I smiled as he stared at it.
"Creation is amazing." He said
"The doctor said I am healthy." I said
"Good." He said
He looked at me reaching down taking my hand in his.
"Sara, I want to marry you."
"That's a big step."
"I know."
"I want to marry you to."
"Then let's do it."
I nodded smiling.
A few days later Grissom pulled me into his office holding out a black box in his hand. I smiled opening it seeing a diamond ring.
"If you don't like it we can choose another." He said
"It's rather large." I said, laughing.
"It won't be once you put it on." He said, taking the ring out of the box grabbing my hand sliding it on my ring finger. I looked at it then at him.
"It's still big, but I like it."
"We can get a different one." He said
"No, I want this one because you picked it out." I said, before kissing him.
A few months later I sat on the bed in his house eating ice cream out of the container watching a car chase on his TV on the dresser. He came in smiling as I smiled at him.
"You know these police chases look authentic." I said
"I think they give the criminal a five minute head start." He said, as he sat on the other side of the bed.
I laughed putting the container down leaning back as I rubbed my belly. Grissom looked at me as I sighed.
"What's wrong?"
I looked over at him.
"I feel like I am going to burst."
He shook his head reaching over touching my stomach.
"With your heavy eating lately it has been worrying me."
"I get cravings." I said
"Honey, you need to take a break and eat salads."
I nodded watching the TV.
"The other day I got a craving for pepperoni."
"Thus ends this vegetarian lifestyle." He said, flipping through a magazine.
"Oh no, I am not eating anything with a tail, feathers, or that moo's."
He smiled as I sighed again.
"Not to change the subject, but when are we to marry?"
I moved over laying my head on his leg.
"Do you want to marry soon?" I asked
"Well if you want to."
"What if we just went to the court house and did it?" I asked, moving to lie on my back looking up at him.
"You don't want a fancy wedding?"
"No, I just want it to be you and I. This is our day and no one else's."
"I like the sound of that." He said, touching my cheek.
I wore a black suit as Grissom wore a blue suit the next week as we went to the court house to marry. Then we went to work a few hours later wearing our rings. I could not stop looking at mine smiling feeing content to be just Mrs. Grissom.
The months went by one by one and no one noticed the mysterious rings or the way we looked at each other at times. I was not happy being put on maternity leave. Grissom sat reading in bed as I moved to my back groaning. It was a hot evening and I was very uncomfortable. He looked over at me as I closed my eyes putting my hand over my belly. He could see I was sweating. I opened my eyes looking up at him.
"I don't think I can sleep."
"You will soon." He said, taking my hand.
I sat up with difficulty sighing. He watched me stand rubbing my stomach.
"You okay?" He asked
I nodded leaving the room. I went into the living room. Grissom walked out not seeing me. He walked into the kitchen seeing me drinking water in a glass. He leaned against the counter watching me. I sighed putting the glass down winching as I rubbed my back.
"What's wrong?" He asked
"Nothing, just a small ache in my back." I said
He nodded watching me still. I walked over kissing him slowly then I moved back touching his gray tee shirt.
"I'm sorry about not being myself lately." I said
"Honey, you are going through a lot of mood changes. I understand."
I smiled some looking down at his shirt.
"Now that I am in my ninth month I am a little scared."
He kissed me then smoothed my cheek.
"Women do this all the time. You will be fine. We have a great doctor and we are ready. You will be a good mother and I will be a good father."
"I once left my doll baby outside because I was mad at it." I said
He smiled smoothing my hair.
"Live babies are different and you will not leave it outside."
"What if I leave it at the grocery store, or in a hot car?" I said "I am starting to panic!"
"Sara, listen to me. Once you have the baby it will be okay. Remember I am learning to. Let's just not worry and try our best."
I hugged him then I moved back touching my stomach.
"Baby kicking?" He asked, touching my stomach.
"No, the baby's coming." I said
He stared at me as I looked down feeling my water break.
"Let's get to the hospital." He said, calmly.
"My bag is in the closet!" I said, watching him run to the bedroom. That is when the pain came. I hunched over clutching the counter yelling. Grissom came out looking at me pulling me to him as we walked out slowly to the car.
"Just breathe, Sara!" He said, holding my hand in the car as he drove to the hospital.
"I….can't…..hurts to much!" I said
"You have to try."
He looked over at me as I tried to breathe when another contraction hit.
"Oh, here is comes!" I said, screaming.
"It's okay." Grissom said
"I…can't….do this!" I said
"Yes, you can!"
I shook my head sweating.
"No….I don't want to!"
"Sara, you are having a baby whether you want to or not."
I started to cry as another hit. He got to the emergency entrance getting out quickly asking two men to help him. I screamed again as he opened the door getting me out. I was wheeled inside taken to a room. Grissom came in seeing the nurses checking my status. He took my hand watching them. The doctor came in sitting down at my feet lifting up the blanket examining me.
"Sara, you are almost fully dilated."
"Then she will deliver?" Grissom asked
"In most cases the first baby takes the longest to come out, but in this case I think in a few hours."
"Hours?" I said
"Sit tight and relax. I will be back soon."
I looked at Grissom.
"Hours?" I said
"That's what he said." Grissom said "How do you feel?"
"Tired." I said, closing my eyes.
He kissed my head getting a chair sitting down taking my hand again. It didn't take long for the contraction to start again. Then I wanted to push. The doctor came in telling us it was time. I pushed hard trying to get it over with fast. The baby came out as the doctor caught it. I laid back on the bed breathing in and out fast as Grissom looked curiously at the red object in the doctor's arms.
"What is it?" I asked
"It's a boy!" The doctor said
I sighed looking up at Grissom who still looked curious. The nurse walked over to us showing us the baby.
"May I?" Grissom asked
She gave him the baby. Grissom held him uneasily at first then he looked like a natural.
"Sara, he looks like you."
I smiled looking at my son. Grissom smiled at me then he looked at his son. We named him Sam since we could not think of anything else that we liked. We went home after a day and a half. Grissom carried him in as I walked slowly to the living room sitting down on the couch. Grissom walked over sitting down beside me holding a sleeping baby.
"I look at him and I am in shock that this little person came from me." I said
"The creation of life can be amazing." He said, looking down at Sam.
"Now I am terrified." I said
He looked at me seeing it was true.
"We take this one day at a time." He said
I slowly nodded. Sam cried in the other room as I slowly got up walking out of the bedroom into the one next door where the crib was. Sam screamed as I quickly picked him up not understanding what exactly he wanted.
"Are you hungry?" I asked, sitting in the rocking chair near the crib. I tried to feed him, but he didn't want that. It was then I realized he needed to be changed. I set him on the changing table watching him scream squirming around. Nervously I started to undo his diaper opening it I gasped almost throwing up.
"Come on Sara, you have seen and smelled worse." I said, to myself out loud.
The smell was overwhelming. I remembered to breathe through my mouth as I tried to quickly clean in him up.
Grissom came in turning on the light as I turned looking at him.
"You look a little green." He said
"I….am changing his diaper." I said
He smiled looking down at Sam.
"Why don't you let me handle that?"
"I am going to let you." I said, stepping away watching him. Grissom calmly walked over changing the baby. I remembered he was used to smelling horrible things. He put the new diaper on then picked him up looking at me.
"Now I think it is dinner time." He said, over the crying.
I nodded taking my son sitting down lifting my shirt. Sam latched on to my breast drinking and we were once again in silence. Grissom kissed me then he took the soiled diaper out throwing it away. I rocked with Sam watching him slowly fall asleep. When I came back into the bedroom Grissom was in bed waiting for me smiling.
"What?" I said, getting in beside him.
"I think it is funny that you can stand in a room with a dead body, but you can't change a diaper."
"Everyone has a weakness." I said, yawning.
He chuckled moving closer to me kissing my head then he laid down. I slept the rest of the night not hearing a peep out of the baby. Grissom held Sam as he waited for his time to leave for work. I came out smiling at him leaning over kissing him.
"That's why I didn't hear him crying." I said
"He and I need time to ourselves." He said, smiling.
"Well I am glad you have gotten into this father thing." I said, getting some juice from the fridge.
"It's a piece of cake."
I shook my head getting a glass from the cabinet. Grissom left and I was alone with this baby. I stared at him in his crib. He looked at me moving his tiny fingers. I picked him up gently carrying him into the living room sitting in a chair laying him on my lap.
"What do I do with you?" I said
The baby just made little sounds stretching out his hands. Catherine walked alongside Grissom in the hallway.
"I am still annoyed that you two got married without telling me and that Sara was carrying your child." She said
"Sorry, we wanted to just keep it to ourselves."
"Well that needs to stop." She said, as her phone rang.
"Willow's." She said
"Catherine, its Sara."
"Hi Sara." She said, seeing Grissom stop looking at her. "How are you doing?"
"I don't know what I am doing! The baby won't stop crying and I have tried to feed and change him."
"Okay calm down."
"What's wrong?" Grissom asked, concerned.
Catherine put her hand over her cell phone looking at him.
"The baby is crying." She said, putting the phone back to her ear. "Sara, there has to be a reason why he is crying. Does he have a fever?"
I checked holding the baby.
"Yes, what do I do?"
"You need to take him to the hospital or call your doctor."
Grissom looked at her worried now.
"Hospital, okay." I said, hanging up.
Catherine hung up looking at him.
"He does have a fever."
"I'll see you later." He said, going.
I raced to the hospital running in with Sam against me panicking thinking about how Grissom would be mad. They took him into a room as I went with them standing in a corner of the room shaking listening to the baby screaming. The nurses tried to calm him down as the doctor came in checking him.
Grissom appeared looking over at where the baby was then at me. I ran over hugging him wanting to cry. He held me listening to the medical staff talking.
"It's going to be okay." He said
"I don't know what I did." I said
"You didn't do anything."
The doctor walked over to us.
"How is he?" I asked, scared.
"His fever has hit the danger zone. We are going to try to bring it down."
"What caused this?" Grissom asked
"It could be a number of things. Everywhere we go including hospitals have germs that can latch onto a body and infect. Right now I need you both to go out to the waiting room and I will come out to talk to you. We need to work on the baby."
"I am not leaving him!" I said
"Sara, we are in the way." Grissom said, pulling me with him. I looked over at my son still crying red with fever. We sat down in some chairs in the waiting room. Grissom took my hand looking at me.
"This is my fault." I said
"What do you mean?"
I looked at him with tears going down my cheeks.
"I should have been better prepared to take care of a baby."
"Sara, you could not have known this would happen."
I sniffed looking down at our hands.
"If he dies I don't want any more children."
"Honey." He said
I looked at him.
We waited for what seemed for hours. The doctor came out with a grim face. Grissom and I stood looking at him.
"He has a bad infection in his lungs. We tried to give him some antibiotics, but they are not helping."
"What are you saying?" I asked
He looked between us.
"There is nothing we can do."
Grissom let his head fall to his chest as he closed his eyes. I stared in disbelief as the doctor looked at us sadly.
"I am very sorry."
"Thank you." Grissom said "Can we see him?"
"Yes, but just for a second."
Grissom led me back to the room where the nurses were standing around the small table where our baby was trying to breathe. Grissom leaned down kissing his head. I walked away to the door leaving. Grissom just watched me go then he looked down at Sam. He came out seeing me sitting on the floor holding my head shaking as I cried. I felt him lift me up against him.
We got home an hour later. Grissom watched me walk around the house in a daze till I finally went into the baby's room looking around. He came in trying to pull me out.
"Honey, you need to lie down."
I shook my head walking over to the crib feeling the wood looking down at the empty space. I then looked over at the changing table walking over throwing things to the floor. Grissom watched me tear the room apart then collapse on the floor sobbing. He knelt down trying to hold me. I turned putting my arms around his neck crying into his shirt.
A month later I was at work trying to get on with my life. Grissom was walking past the break room when he saw me coming out carrying a large cup of coffee.
"Hey." He said, stopping to look at me up and down. "You look nice tonight."
"Thank's." I said, smiling faintly.
"In fact I have a crush on you."
"Stop." I said
"What?" He said, facing me.
"You don't have to do this." I said
"Sara, I love you."
"I know, but you don't have to."
He looked around pulling me into the break room closing the door.
"I am going to flirt with you because I love you and I want you to be happy again."
"Maybe I don't want to be happy yet." I said, sighing.
He touched my cheek not caring who saw us.
"Honey, I am worried about you. I know this has been a very difficult time for you, but we need to look to the future."
I slowly nodded hugging him.
"You can flirt with me again."
He smiled.
"I was going to."
I smiled against his shoulder. I went on a case with Nick on the strip at a hotel. We went into one of the rooms seeing blood spray all over the place.
"Man." Nick said
"This is to much blood for just one person." I said
"Yeah."
We went to work not seeing another body. When our time was over I walked out with Nick hearing something in the alleyway.
"I'll be right back." I said, walking over carefully. I saw a dumpster and the sound got louder. It was a babies crying. I ran over climbing in the dumpster moving things around hearing Nick running over.
"Is that a baby?" He asked, watching me lift something wrapped in a bloody blanket out. He helped me climb out watching me unwrap the baby.
"This is a newborn." I said, seeing the umbilical cord still attached.
"Some jerk just dumped it in here." Nick said
"It's a girl." I said
"I think we should get her to the hospital."
"Yeah." I said, walking with Nick.
Later I walked into the hospital to check on the baby. The nurse took me into a room where they had her. She lay sleeping in a blanket.
"Were you the lady that found her?" The nurse asked
"Yes."
"Good thing you did. She would have frozen to death." She said "Would you like to hold her?"
"Um….maybe." I said
The nurse smiled lifting the baby holding her out to me. I took her seeing that she slowly opened her eyes making little baby sounds.
"Do you have children?" The nurse asked
"No." I said
"I think she likes you."
I looked down seeing the baby was quiet and looking up at me with blue eyes. Grissom watched me come in the house happy.
"What are you happy about?" He asked
I kissed him then moved back.
"I want a baby."
He stopped smiling as I smiled.
"Sara, I don't think it's a good idea right now."
"Not one of my own. Tonight I found a newborn baby in a dumpster and I want her."
"Nick told me about her."
"She likes me."
"You went to see her?"
"Yes, and I held her."
He sighed letting me go frowning.
"Sara, we can't have her."
I frowned looking at him.
"Why not?"
"She is not ours. Somewhere out there is a family. If they can't find them they will put her in a foster home or adopt her."
"We should adopt her."
"Sara, listen to me." He said, putting his hands on my shoulders. "I know you want her, but you can't have her."
I backed away feeling tears.
"You just don't want to have a baby!"
"I would love another, but I am worried about you."
"I want that baby!" I said, sniffing running past him to the bedroom slamming the door. He looked down shaking his head. I laid in bed crying feeling my heart breaking all over again. Grissom came in sliding in bed behind me holding me to him.
"Honey, I know how you feel."
"No, you don't." I said
"Tell me then."
I took his hand looking at the wall.
"I keep blaming myself over what happened to Sam."
He kissed my head.
"You don't have to."
"I think about that day and what I should have done when I heard him coughing. I can't seem to shake the feeling that I failed. I wanted that baby I found so I could make up for the mistake I made."
He pulled me to my back looking at me. I watched him lean down kissing me. He knew what I needed as he began to touch me. The sensation of his body over mine was a great comfort knowing he would never abandon me.
After that we went to sleep holding each other.
A few weeks later Grissom and I were walking to the Tahoe after we finished at a scene. I handed him the bags of evidence as he put them in the back of the trunk. He closed the door looking at me. I looked down at my stomach touching it.
"Sara, what's wrong?" He asked
I looked at him almost smiling.
"I have that feeling again."
"Feeling, what feeling?"
"I'm going to have a baby."
He said nothing as he looked at me steering me to the passenger side door. We stopped at a drug store getting a test then he drove us to the lab. We walked inside and he told me to go do the test. I ran into the women's bathroom waiting twenty minutes. My watch alarm beeped as I walked over to the sink shaking. Lifting the test up looking at the results.
Grissom saw me walk in to the lab room he was in. I sat on a stool next to him snapping on some gloves looking at the table.
"Well?" He asked
I looked at him.
"It….was a false alarm." I said
"Oh." He said
He took my hand rubbing it then we got to work. After shift Greg and I met up talking outside as Grissom came out. He saw me fall to my knees as Greg leaned down touching my arm talking to me. Grissom knew he had to pretend to be the boss instead of the husband. He ran over kneeling down beside me.
"Sara, what's wrong?" Greg asked
When I slumped down more Grissom and Greg pulled me up.
"Put her in my car and I'll take her to the hospital." Grissom said
"Okay."
They helped me into the car and Grissom drove out taking my hand as he glanced at me.
"Sara, talk to me."
I had my eyes closed as my head laid to the side. He grew more worried when I didn't respond. Once at the hospital the Doctor examined me then he had me rest while he took Grissom outside into the hallway.
"Sara is pregnant." He said
"She can't be. The test said she was not." Grissom said
"Tests can be faulty. It's important that she rest's and eat good foods. Otherwise she will continue to have fainting spells."
"Thank you."
"Let her rest a little then you can take her home."
Grissom nodded going back inside. I slept on the bed as he walked over touching my hand leaning down kissing me. I moved not opening my eyes.
"Gris?"
"Sara, we are having a baby."
I felt his lips move down my temple to my cheek. I sighed wanting to sleep. He moved back watching me relax.
Once we went home I realized that it was true. My morning sickness started and then the cravings I had started again. Grissom made sure I slept and ate. I worried until I started reading all the baby books I could.
I came into Grissom's office as I reached my fifth month. He watched me sit down in a chair tired.
"Something wrong dear?"
"I wish men could have babies."
He chuckled looking down at his paperwork on his desk.
"Me to."
"I walk around with swollen ankles and feet. The guys say how adorable I look. I want to kick them to show them how adorable I feel."
"I would rather you didn't." He said
I sighed looking at him. He sat back in his chair looking at me.
"Did you get the ice cream?" I asked
"I will after work."
"I really want some."
"You'll have to wait." He said
"Please go get me some." I pleaded
"Sara, I am working."
"I love you." I said, smiling.
He smiled shaking his head.
"No."
"I know the sex of the baby." I said, trying another tactic.
"I know you do and if you tell me what it is I still won't do it."
"What do you want to have?"
"I don't care as long as it is healthy."
"I know you want a boy."
"Sara." He warned
I stood walking over to his side of the desk. I took his hand placing it on my belly.
"I feel fingers moving along your skin." He said, smiling.
I smiled looking down. He came home hearing me humming in the kitchen. I stirred some soup on the stove in a pot in my pajamas. He walked over kissing my head.
"What are you making?"
"Um….beans, chicken, mixed with ice cream and tomato sauce."
He grimaced looking at the strange mixture of ingredients in the pot.
"You're eating chicken?"
I nodded looking down at the soup.
"I think I'll get us some take out." He said, walking past me phoning. I lifted up the spoon tasting it.
"Yuck!" I said, turning it off dumping it. Grissom watched me walk over sitting beside him on the couch then I laid down putting my feet on his lap.
He turned on the TV rubbing my feet. I smiled looking over at the movie playing. The food came and I was starving. He lifted out the Chinese takeout containers.
"Keeping with your chicken craving I got you broccoli and chicken." He said, handing me the white container. I opened it up breathing in the fumes.
"Mmm."
He sat watching me eat then I started eating from his plate. I ate an egg roll as he ate one. After that we went to bed. I got up later going to the bathroom feeling indigestion. Grissom moved feeling my side was empty. He sat up seeing the bathroom door was closed.
"Sara?" He called, getting up walking to the door.
"Yeah?" I said
"You okay?"
I threw up which alarmed him as he opened the door looking at me. I threw up again then I flushed the commode getting up washing my face.
"I ate to much." I said
He touched my head then helped me wipe my face with a towel. We laid back down sleeping. The next day I was up and ready for work despite fighting with Grissom about staying home. He surrendered knowing I was being stubborn.
We went to work as usual. Grissom walked me to the lab's front door when he stopped looking off to the left.
"What's wrong?" I asked
He didn't answer as he continued to look over.
"Grissom?"
He recovered looking at me.
"Sara, go inside and call Brass tell him to come out to the front door of the lab. Then stay inside."
"Why?"
"Please just go." He said
I went in looking back out at him. He looked over where he was before walking to the left. I got hold of Brass telling him what Grissom needed then I walked back to the front door seeing Grissom and Brass talking outside motioning over to something. They both walked towards whatever it was and that is when an explosion hit them and me causing a loud shockwave shattered glass as the alarms went off. People screamed all around me as I laid on the floor trying to get up again.
"Sara, stay down!" Catherine shouted, running over kneeling down.
"Grissom!" I called
"It's okay, just lay still." She said
"Cath, what happened?" Warrick asked, as he ran over.
"Bomb maybe, go outside wait for the ambulance. Get Greg and Nick to check for injuries."
"You got it."
Catherine looked at me seeing I was terrified.
"Just stay calm." She said
She touched my stomach searching for injuries as people ran by. I winched as she checked my side.
"What's wrong?" I asked
"It will be all right." She said
"Catherine, it's a mess outside. The ambulances have arrived." Warrick said
"Good, go get one for Sara."
"Wait, where is Grissom?" I said
He didn't answer as he stood there.
"Warrick!" I said
"He's outside near Brass. They are both hurt bad. The EMT's are tending to them."
I felt my heart race as Catherine took my hand. The EMT's came taking me out on the stretcher. I moved looking around seeing blood on the pavement and the smell of smoke. As we came to the hospital I kept asking about Grissom. No one could say what was going on. I was given stitches on my side and checked by the doctor telling me that I would have to stay overnight.
"My husband was hurt. Can you tell me if he is all right?"
"What is his name?"
"Gil Grissom." I said
"I will find out for you." He said, leaving.
I sighed laying still looking at the heart monitor that had mine and the baby's heart beats. I rubbed my stomach causing the baby's heart beat to calm down. My doctor came in looking at the monitor.
"Sara, despite what you have gone through the baby seems fine."
"Good."
He reached over touching my hand.
"Your husband is in surgery. They told me he has a deep gash on his head and a wound in his stomach that could be serious."
"What about Captain Brass?"
"He is in surgery for a broken arm and leg."
I nodded.
"I want you to rest and I will have someone come in and give you an update."
"Thank you."
He nodded looking back at the monitor before leaving. I wiped the tears from my face lying back thinking about the possibility that he could die.
Trying to relax was hard. Sleeping was worse as I waited for news. Mentally I prepared myself, but as I looked at my stomach the tears started again. I felt pain winching as I moved around. The nurse came in checking my status. She ran out sending in the doctor. He looked at the monitor reaching over touching my stomach.
"What's…..happening?" I cried
"You're going into premature labor." He said
I moved crying as the pain got worse hearing the doctor shouting for something. He put something into my IV. After a few minutes the pain eased and I was able to sleep. The doctor watched the monitor then he looked at the nurse.
"We need to watch her closely."
The nurse nodded looking at the monitor.
Grissom slowly opened his eyes feeling numb. His eyes focused on the hospital room he was in remembering the explosion. The door opened as Catherine came in looking tired, but relieved he was going to be okay.
"Hey." She said
"Brass?" He said
"He's going to be all right."
He swallowed trying to focus on her.
"You have to stay here and rest."
"Sara?" He asked
She sighed feeling his hand grip hers.
"She is in the hospital for a side injury. They were able to stitch the wound, but she went into premature labor."
He looked at her worried.
"She lost the baby?"
"No, they were able to stop the contractions."
He sighed closing his eyes. She patter his hand.
"It will be okay, Gil."
He opened his eyes looking at her.
I woke seeing the nurse standing by the bed doing an ultra sound on the baby.
"What's wrong?" I asked, scared.
"You're going to be fine. The doctor asked me to perform an ultra sound to see how the baby is doing." She said
I calmed down looking over at the screen seeing my baby moving around. The nurse smiled nodding.
"She is holding her own. She must take after you."
I smiled faintly. The doctor came in smiling at me.
"Sara, your husband is awake asking about you."
"He's all right?"
"He needs to stay here for a week at least, but I think he will be just fine."
I nodded relieved.
"Doctor, the baby looks healthy." The nurse said, showing him.
"Good, we will be monitoring your condition for a little bit and if by tomorrow you are able to go home then you can."
"Can I see him?"
"I want you to stay in that bed."
I sighed unhappy.
The next day I was able to go home, but I needed to see Grissom. He slept as I walked in looking pale hooked up to machines. My cold hand touched his and he woke looking at me.
"Sara."
I took his hand watching him let go of mine touching my stomach.
"How is the baby?"
"Great, don't worry about that." I said
He looked at me.
"Everything is going to be all right." I said
Once I got home I went to the bedroom crying. Trying to be strong was taking a toll on me. Grissom needed to see that I was in control. Grissom came home a week and a half later told to rest by the doctor. I cooked him soup and made sure he was comfortable never thinking of myself once. One day I brought in some soup for him as he sat on the couch watching the news. He watched me lay the bowl down on the coffee table with a spoon. I stood wiping my head looking at him.
"I'll get you something to drink."
He reached for my hand making me stop.
"Wait."
"What's wrong?" I asked
"Sit down."
I sat looking at him.
"Honey, I appreciate all you do, but you need to rest." He said, touching my cheek.
"I will."
"Sara, you are exhausted. It's not good for the baby."
I nodded looking down.
"I will be fine. I want you to eat and rest."
"Okay."
He nodded watching me get up. I walked to the kitchen getting a snack then I went to the bedroom laying down. Lying there I listened to the TV sighing knowing I could not sleep. Grissom got up his first day back at work a few weeks later. It was the beginning of my seventh month. I sat up on the bed feeling sick. Grissom put on his brown coat looking over at me as I sat hunched over looking down.
"Sara, are you feeling okay?" He asked
"I feel kind of rough." I said
He walked over touching my head.
"You a little warm. Why don't you lay down and I'll call the doctor." He said
"I have to work on the case." I said, feeling him push me down.
"I'll get someone to cover for you. Lay still." He said, getting his phone out dialing.
I watched him walk around finally talking to the doctor.
"This is Gil Grissom, my wife has a slight fever." He said "She is seven months."
He walked over touching my head again.
"It's warm to touch." He said, standing. I watched him look at me as he listened. "I should make her rest…..I can do that thank you."
He hung up looking at me again.
"You are to rest and stay in bed. They said that sometimes this happens."
"I feel so useless."
He leaned down kissing me.
"You are not to me."
I smiled faintly watching him get up walking out.
Grissom came home later smelling something good. He set down his things hearing me coming.
"Do you like it?" I asked, smiling.
He stood there with his mouth open looking at my sexy black dress that just about covered my rear end. I walked over to him in my black high heels giving him a kiss he would never forget. He moved back looking at me in wonder.
"Where did you get that?"
"I bought it a while ago."
He moved me away so he could look at it again.
"I….suppose this is what someone does when their….speechless."
I smiled looking down.
"What is that smell?" He asked
"Spaghetti and eggplant."
"You made that?" He asked
"Well with the help of the Italian restaurant down the road." I said
He kissed me again putting his hands on my back sliding them down. I laughed moving back.
"Mr. Grissom, what are you doing?"
"I can't get over how beautiful you look."
"Being pregnant you tend to let yourself go." I said
He touched my stomach.
"Honey, I think you look lovely every time I see you."
"I felt unattractive."
He sighed shaking his head.
"Is dinner ready?"
"It's warming in the oven."
"Good then we have time." He said, leading me into the living room.
"Time for what?"
"Bedroom." He said, pulling me along. I chuckled walking behind him shutting the door.
Grissom moved in bed waking hours later sensing that I was awake. He moved over kissing my bare shoulder.
"Are you awake?" He asked, quietly.
"Yes."
"I forgot to ask you earlier how you are feeling." He asked
"Better, I think I just had a bug." I said, moving onto my back looking at him.
He nodded looking down at me. Taking my hand he kissed my fingers.
"Sorry about tearing the dress."
"That's okay." I said
"It was very pretty."
"I could tell you liked it."
He smiled nodding.
"Next time I think you should just greet me naked."
I laughed as he did.
"You are supposed to be a gentlemen."
"Just a thought."
"Well get it out of your head."
I yawned making him smile.
"I think you can sleep now."
He moved to his back as I put my head on his chest closing my eyes.
Everyone kept asking me if I was nervous about being in my ninth month and as I had done this before I said no, even though I was inside. Maternity leave was put on me early in my mid seventh month which caused a huge fight in the Grissom house. The doctor sided with Grissom which put me in a corner.
I walked into the lab looking for my husband. He stood in the hallway with Nick talking about something. When Nick nodded at me Grissom looked over then he talked to Nick again before coming over to me.
"Hello dear."
"Hey." I said
"What was so important that made you come all the way here?" He asked, taking my arm leading me to his office.
"You got a call from a George Hanson asking if you would come do a lecture series in Washington D.C.?"
"Oh, good." He said, leaving my side to go to his desk.
"You are going?" I asked
"I was thinking about doing it in the spring."
"You're serious?" I asked
He looked at me.
"It was just a thought."
"We are about to have a baby and you are running off to do a lecture?"
"Sara, there is no need to be angry. I may not take it."
I looked at him and he knew something was coming.
"Grissom, I want you to call him back and tell him you are not interested!"
With that, I walked out hearing him call my name. I went out to the parking lot pacing seeing Catherine.
"Sara, look at you!" She said, walking over. "What's wrong?"
Grissom came out seeing Catherine take my hand as I fell to my knees in pain. He ran over trying to help. An ambulance arrived loading me on as Grissom gripped my hand scared. I was rushed into the hospital with Grissom by my side. The put me into a room where the doctor was checking me. The nurse gave Grissom some scrubs.
"Put those on now." The doctor said
"The baby is coming now?" Grissom asked
"I would say in a few minutes." He said
I cried screaming as the pain intensified. Grissom came back taking my hand dressed in the blue scrubs looking pale.
"Sara, push!" The doctor said
I pushed hard falling back on the bed.
"I see a head!" He said
"Grissom?" I said
He looked at me seeing I was shaking.
"Push!" The doctor shouted.
I pushed again screaming out feeling the baby come out. Grissom looked over at the doctor. The doctor looked over at him smiling.
"It's a girl!"
"A girl?" Grissom asked, looking at me.
I smiled weakly squeezing his hand.
"Surprise." I said
He let my hand go to take the baby in his arms as the nurse handed her over to him. I looked at her pale skin with curled black hair on her head.
"She's perfect." He said
"I'm glad you like her." I said
"I do."
He leaned down kissing my head then he stood looking back at her.
"I love her."
I slept for a few hours waking as Grissom came in walking over to me.
"Where were you?"
"I can't stop staring at her." He said
"She is pretty."
"I would never want to replace Sam, but have this precious little girl in the world has made me feel proud."
I smiled touching his cheek.
"Are you all right?" He asked
"I'm just tired."
"Honey, I am sorry about our fight. I was being selfish. I called George and told him I don't want to go."
"Really?"
"Yes, I want to stay here and be with you."
"We have to name her."
"How about Isabella Rose Grissom?"
"I like it."
"Me to." He said, kissing me.