"She's dead." What? What had Carlisle just said? Dead? No, that had to be a joke --- a sick one. She couldn't be dead. How could my Bella be dead? I just stared at him, being unable to do anything else. I couldn't wrap my head around that sentence. She's dead. What did that mean? She's dead. It didn't make any sense to me, she couldn't be dead. She wasn't. I'd just talked to her, ten hours ago, before I went hunting. She couldn't be dead.
"It's not funny, Carlisle," I growled. How could he, of all people, make jokes about death?
"It's not a joke," he whispered and his voice broke at the end.
"She's not dead," I said, more to myself than to him. "She can't be dead."
"I'm sorry, Edward." Alice. That had been Alice. I looked at her and my dead heart went silent. There was agony, unending agony, in her features. And that could just mean one thing. Someone died. Was it Jasper? No, I'd been hunting with him. Was it Rosalie? No, she sat on the couch, Emmett beside her. And Esme? Where was Esme? I listened intently, trying to figure out where she was. I heard her sobbing. No. NO!
"Bella?", I called now, hoping desperately she would just ran down the stairs, probably stumbling over her own feet. But she didn't come.
"Bella!", I shouted again, my voice sounding hoarse. "Bella, where are you?"
I tried to run upstairs, but two pairs of hands held me. "Edward, you have to listen to me."
"No, I want to go to Bella. She's waiting for me," I insisted.
"She's dead, Edward. She's not waiting for you."
I laughed once, without any humor. "She's not dead." My voice sounded even more desperate than before.
I listened again, trying to hear her heartbeat --- The most significant sound in my world --- but I couldn't find it. It wasn't here. She wasn't here.
"Where's Bella?", I asked. She couldn't be dead.
No one answered. They all just looked... compassionate. And sad.
"Where is she?", I insisted, even though my mind slowly got what happened.
"Edward," Carlisle murmured and took a step forward, his arms reaching out to touch me.
I flinched away from him. "Where is she? I want to see her."
"Upstairs, in my office. But-" I didn't hear the rest --- I was already gone.
I darted through the door and froze. There she was. My Bella. Dead. There was a lot of blood, her blood, but I didn't care. I didn't even recognize the thirst. Her body, her beautiful body, was broken. Her neck seemed crushed, and so did the rest of her body. In an instant I was by her side, kneeling at her head.
"What happened to you?", I whispered, carefully stroking her cheek. It wasn't flushed, as it usually was. It was white and hard. And cold. Just like my skin. I felt a tiny spark of hope. Maybe she wasn't dead? Maybe they just wanted to make fun of me? Maybe they changed her into a vampire?
"Bella," I choked out. "It's not funny. Please, just get up."
I almost expected her to jump up, screaming "Gotcha!" in my face. But she didn't.
"Bella." My voice was just a faint whisper, almost inaudible. "Bella," I chanted. "Bella. Bella. Bella"
What had happened to her? Why was she dead? She couldn't be dead!
"Edward." I didn't look up to respond to Carlisle. I just nodded, hoping he would tell me what had happened.
"She...Fell and broke her neck. There wasn't anything I could've done. She just died. Right in front of my. I tried to save her, I bit her, trying to heal the wounds. But I was too late, her heart had stopped beating. I was too late." His voice broke several times and he sounded like he was choking and sobbing.
I nodded again, telling him I understood. Of course she fell.
"Edward, we have to tell Charlie."
I didn't respond. I didn't care about Charlie. It was my life lying in front of me, dead. Dead. Gone. I reached out and took her in my arms, cradling her against my chest.
Time passed. I didn't know how much. Maybe minutes, maybe hours. I didn't care. Time had lost it's meaning. I just sat there, rocking back and forth with her in my arms.
"Edward?", a faint voice asked. I didn't answer, I couldn't. "Edward, we have to lay her down and clean her. Charlie's going to be here soon."
I still didn't move except for my rocking. I didn't want to let go off her. How could I?
Then someone held me while someone else took her right out of my arms.
"No!", I yelled, struggling against the iron hold. "Give her back to me!"
They ignored me. "No!," I shouted all over again. "No, no, no!"
Frantic sobs overcame me as I watched Carlisle cleaning up the broken corpse of Bella.
I heard someone whisper, but I didn't want to listen. I didn't care what they were saying.
Suddenly I was in the air. Someone was carrying me. Away from her.
"NO!," I yelled again, furiously fighting to get back to her. I couldn't see her anymore! I couldn't see her! I had to get back to her or they would bring her away! They would just bring her away, not giving me a chance to say goodbye!
Finally I was able to get out of the someone's arms. I raced back into the room, roughly shoving Carlisle out of my way.
"Just give me one minute. I want to say goodbye to her," I choked out as the arms tried to yank me back again.
I turned around a bit to check if I was alone. I was.
"Bella," I whispered. "I love you. Please, don't forget that. I'll always love you. Wait for me --- I'm going to join you soon."
I kissed her forehead and darted out the closed window, shattering it into a million pieces.
I was going to Italy.