Disclaimer: I do not own the characters nor the Star Wars concept. Lucasfilm does. I am very respectfully borrowing them with no intent to profit. No credits have changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended.
Mom,
I want to come home.
Please let me come back. I'll save all the money I can and hop the first ship back as soon as I have it all. I miss you so much. I miss my friends, I even miss Watto. I promise I'll be good and not build stupid droids any more and not talk back ever, ever again.
Mom, I don't like it here. I know that you told me not to look back but it's not what I thought it would be. It's scary, really scary and people die. We went to help Padme and Master Qui-Gon died.
I know that I said I wanted to be a Jedi Knight like Master sir and I did. But something bad happened and he got killed and no one will tell me about it. I didn't know that Jedi could die. Master Qui-Gon said that Jedi could but I didn't believe him. At least, I didn't before but I do now.
Can I come home?
It's not like they are mean to me here on Coruscant but Master Obi-Wan is pretty strict and he doesn't talk much. Sometimes, he looks at me funny, kind of sad and confused but then he turns nice again. He's not bad or anything. You didn't meet Master Obi-Wan but he's my Master now. It's kind of a confusing story. When me and Master Qui-Gon and Master Obi-Wan got to the Temple, the Jedi Council tried to tell me I couldn't be one of them. Even after I passed all their tests. But that made Master Qui-Gon mad and he stood up for me.
Master Obi-Wan didn't like it much when he did that and he said some pretty mean things about me when he thought I couldn't hear. I'm not sure that he liked it when Master Qui-Gon sir told him off. But he did try and treat me okay afterwards. He didn't say any bad things to my face at least. And he showed me some wizard stuff about fixing things. We both like to do that and it was fun.
So I thought it would be okay to try and be friends with him. Master Qui-Gon liked him so he must be a good person. And he did try to be nice to me on the trip back to Naboo, even made sure I had enough to eat and a place to sleep. But I don't know. He was mad about something and I felt funny about being around him so I stayed mostly with Master Qui-Gon sir.
But when Master sir was killed - oh Mom, it was so awful when it happened - when he died, the Council changed their mind and said that I could be a Jedi after all. I wasn't sure what was going to happen but, at Master Qui-Gon's funeral, Master Obi-Wan told me that he was going to train me.
He seemed unhappy about it or something. Not on the surface unhappy but deep down and buried really sad kind of unhappy. Or maybe he was just upset about Master Qui-Gon dying like that. There was something under it, though. I could feel his anger and guilt even though he tried to cover it up. Why did Master Obi-Wan feel guilty? He hasn't said and I won't ask. It would just hurt him more.
But I want to come home.
Life as a Jedi isn't what I thought. No adventure, no lazerswords and rescuing people like in stories. I thought it would be fun and a wizard thing to do. But it seems that it's full of unhappy stuff, instead. And Master Obi-Wan tries to be nice and help me but I can feel - I think I feel his deep down hidden underground pain. It hurts him so much and he won't let anyone help him with it. Sometimes, I hear him crying in my dreams.
Mom, I love and I miss you and I really, really want to come home. Can I?
Ani