AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, if you're expecting me to update my other Phineas and Ferb fic, Remembering, not Knowing, sorry. Just haven't been in the mood for it lately. Also, water sports have been keeping me busy (and very sore too, crashing on water at high speeds is very painful, but super fun).So, this is an alternate ending for episode 21, season 1, It's About Time! You know how Perry and Doof are on that show? Well, what if instead of doing that, Perry did this? Man, I just realized how much I love 'what-ifs' for shows. I also just realized how Perry is super adorable when he's sad. Those big, adorable eyes… He really knows how to make people pity him. Take lessons from him Doofensmirtz. Poor little Perry is not heartless, and he takes offense to being called such.
Also, shaking means moving your head SIDE TO SIDE, and nodding means moving your head UP AND DOWN! Shaking=no, nodding=yes. It irritates me when people act like they're the same thing. They are most definitely NOT!
DISCLAIMER: I own NOTHING! It should be pretty obvious, considering what "Disclaimer" means. If you don't know, look it up.
After hearing Doofensmirtz and Peter the Panda fighting, Perry was done. His nemesis had abandoned him for another, and there was nothing he could do about it. It was then that decided to set down his fedora, for there was nothing left to do. The other agent was dealing with Heinz, so he had no work until he was assigned to a new person. Unless he was just filling in for others or training new recruits, there was nothing left to do for a while. Evil scientists and such didn't pop up every day, and most new spots came up because of an agent retiring. It was rare nowadays that agents from Major Monogram's division would die, and it would probably stay that way for a long time. The evil levels in Danville were pretty stable, and people were fine with that. Perry preferred it that way, despite it meaning that he wouldn't have a real job for a while. Heck, he could quit working at OWCA if he wanted to. Of course, he didn't want to stop working and become a normal pet, but he could spend more time with his owners if he did that… Maybe it was something worth looking into.
Eventually, Perry reached his lair. He finally decided what he was going to do. He was quitting. If agents were allowed to take nemesis's that weren't theirs, he didn't want to deal with seeing others getting his. Major Monogram and Carl would just have to deal with losing their best agent. He was the only one that had a dark brown fedora, but surely someone else was close to his level. The agency could survive without a platypus. If not, it was their fault for depending on him.
With a sigh, the platypus agent set down his fedora. On the screen, Carl watched with a shocked face. Surely Agent P wouldn't quit just like that…or so he thought. With the tap of a few buttons, Perry confirmed his worst nightmare. Their best agent was giving up. Even Major Monogram, in his frozen state, couldn't suppress a horrified look. What could cause him to stop working with OWCA, they wondered. Carl worked up the strength to ask that very question for himself and Monogram. What Perry responded with surprised them.
On the computer console, he typed, if other agents are able to take my nemesis, and he doesn't want to fight me anymore, there's no point to me working here anymore. Others can do my job just as well as I can, and there are more agents than evil scientists. I prefer to work with only one person, so switching around isn't a good choice. Dealing with new recruits is an even worse one. My best choice is to not work and just go home.
Monogram broke from his frozen state and exclaimed, "But you can't go Agent P! The agency needs you more that you know! And there are other choices! Please just think about this!"
Perry smiled sadly and chattered. I have been thinking about this. This is what I decided on.
"But Agent P, surely there's something else we can do…" Perry shook his head. "Well, at the very least, you need to say your goodbyes to everyone at the agency. We'll leave your lair, for if you ever decide to come back. Please come to HQ so we can properly… (here Monogram sniffles) send you off…"
Monogram and Carl can't help bursting into tears. Here's the greatest agent they ever had, and he's turning in his hat. Here's the agent that Major Monogram personally raised and trained, giving up.
Perry couldn't take any more of the crying. He got his jetpack and flew off to HQ, with tears welling in his eyes along the way.
Every single agent in Monogram's division and a surprising amount from others turned up to send Agent P off. Those who hadn't personally met him, had heard a surprising amount about him from various sources. Many who had only heard of OWCA's amazing agent expected him to be older than he was, and so did not think they would be seeing a relatively young platypus turn in his fedora.
Meanwhile, Perry was being shocked at the amount of people that came to wish him well.
Sometimes, Monogram seriously wondered why he bothered with certain people. He then had to remind himself that it was for Perry. Hopefully Dr. Heinz Doofensmirtz would make it in time to keep a certain agent from making the biggest mistake of his life…
Perry expected many things to happen at his going-away ceremony (although the word ceremony is slightly misleading, because based on the way the agents were acting, you'd think it was a funeral), but he did not expect this. His once-nemesis somehow ended up at HQ, and had found the time to put together a video showcasing their animosity for each other.
Now all the agents were watching with surprise the way he and his nemesis got along. They got an inside look at the way they treated each other. Perry watched with wide eyes as, on the screen, they saw multiple times where Perry popped up near Heinz, and listened to the music playing with them.
My neme, neme, oooo… My neme, neme, neme
I used to sit alone doin' evil all day,
But now I think there's someone gonna get in my way, yeah,
There's someone in my life that doesn't want me to exist,
My neme, neme, oooo... My neme, neme, neme
And I feel fine cause I've got a nemesis.
My neme, neme, oooo... My neme, neme, neme(x2)
And I hate him, and he hates me,
What a wonderful animosities,
Besides his hat he wears no clothes,
Now I have someone to oppose...
Cause I've got a nemesis!
My neme, neme, oooo… My neme, neme, neme
My neme, neme, oooo… My nemesis!
When it was all over, Heinz kind of smiled at Perry and asked him, "So, Perry the Platypus, do you want to…you know, be my nemesis again?"
After a video like that, there really was only one way for Perry to respond.
With a smirk and chatter, Perry pulled out his fedora, and proceeded to hit his nemesis in the head with the surprisingly hard edge of it multiple times. The crowd watched with huge eyes as the platypus and man laughed, like this was perfectly normal (which to them, it was). Seriously, how did they expect the "great" Agent P to respond to all that? With a hug? He was an Agent for crying out loud, he didn't do that sort of stuff, and especially not with his nemesis! (Though he did have a few tears well up, but nobody noticed, and if they did, they said nothing. After all, who knew how the platypus would react if someone mentioned it? Most likely by beating someone up, and nobody wants to be tail-whipped by a platypus.)
OTHER AUTHOR'S NOTE: Can you please review? It would be very appreciated… Of course, it's completely understandable if you don't, because there's not much point in reviewing for a one-shot…