A/N: There is Wicked Swan in this fic, but there's a Swan Queen ending. :)
Rated M for descriptive language.
"You will always lose the ones you love."
Rumple's words echoed in her head as she watched Henry walk away from his bedroom window. The look on his face was far from the hopeful expression he'd had when he'd first brought her to Storybrooke. Now, his jaw was firmly set and his eyes were cool and unforgiving. He looked so hurt, so painfully betrayed.
In hindsight, Emma realized that starting another operation with Henry after what she'd done was probably the worst thing she could have done. It had only made things worse. It had only hurt him more to know that she'd not only been the reason behind his first heartbreak, but she'd also lied to him. Again. He'd made it clear several times after the first curse broke that he didn't like it when either she or Regina lied to him.
And Regina. For all her faults, for all the things she'd done as the Evil Queen, Emma didn't think intentionally causing Henry pain was one of them. She'd stolen and crushed a lot of hearts, but never her own son's. Not like Emma had.
As she replayed the events of the last few days in her mind, she tried to figure out the exact moment she'd gone too far. It didn't take long before she came to the conclusion that she definitely should not have brought that damn dreamcatcher inside the house. If she had left it in the shed along with the dozens of others, Henry wouldn't have seen anything. He wouldn't have known anything as long as the curse was still intact. Regina wouldn't have had a reason to yell at her or to slam the door in her face. They'd come so far from that first couple of days in Storybrooke. It had been three years and they had become friends. Regina had trusted her, or she'd started to apparently, but that was all gone. That trust and friendship and probably co-parenting: gone. Because Regina didn't seem too thrilled with Emma's latest parenting choices and after seeing Henry's reaction to what she knew was a horrible thing to have done, Emma had to agree with her.
She looked up at Henry's bedroom window again. The light was off and as far as Emma could tell he was already in bed or somewhere else in the room out of sight from her. She doubted he would come back to the window. Regina had spent the last few hours with Henry and her impression was that he didn't want to see her. When she'd seen that look in his eyes, so much like his adoptive mother, Emma knew Regina was right.
Sure that neither one of the Mills' cared what she did, Emma stuck around the house. She didn't know why she stayed, especially when she had no right to even poof herself inside without permission, but she didn't need to be anywhere else. And the more she tried to tell herself to go, the more her body seemed drawn in. That was her family inside after all. It killed her that they didn't want her, but she understood it was a difficult situation and not long ago, she and Henry had treated Regina the same way.
She gave into the pull of the two people who probably disliked her most at that point and walked back toward the house. She stood on the porch and leaned against the door as she listened for any signs of life on the other side. It was stupid because even if Regina was still downstairs, Emma knew the other woman wouldn't let her in. She'd had her chance to come clean, had her chance to just air everything out and let Regina help her, but she'd chosen to remain as guarded as possible and hadn't revealed much. That decision cost her an invite into the house as well as cost her Regina's sympathy. Not that Emma expected it. She was no better than Cora. Not in Regina's eyes. Not anymore.
She closed her eyes and kept her head pressed to the door as she continued to listen to the quiet hum of the air conditioning. When she opened her eyes, she brought a hand up to the door and ran her index finger over the numbers. She traced each one of them as she tried to hold herself together. She'd already cried once that day over the same dreamcatcher that had brought her world crashing down on more than one occasion. She didn't want to do it again and she definitely didn't want to do it on Regina's porch.
One. She took a deep breath in as she slid her fingertip down the first number. Zero. Her fingers skated in a circle over the second number as she wondered if things would turn around like she hoped they would. Eight. As her finger trailed over the curves of the last number it reminded her that Storybrooke was lucky number eight. It was the eighth place in a decade she'd found herself in and it was the one place in which she chose to stay.
She dropped her hand back to her side and sighed as she pushed off the door and stepped away from the porch for the second time that night. She didn't bother to check the windows as she turned to her right and started to make her way around the side of the house. She passed the air conditioning unit on her way into the backyard and when she made it to the back of the house, she immediately noticed the apple tree. She smiled to herself as she stared across the yard at it, but the fondness in her expression was tinged with sadness.
Emma turned toward the house and considered sneaking in. Poofing would have been a little invasive for her, but for some reason it felt like less of a violation if she just used magic to unlock the door. She had no idea why she felt better about one more than the other. It was still intrusive no matter what method she chose. And sneaking in hadn't been her plan, hadn't been why she'd stayed. She'd just wanted...to be close to them. She wanted to be close enough that if they needed her, or if they wanted her, she'd be there. She'd try to soothe their fears about who she'd become and she'd try to show them that the Emma they knew from before still existed beneath the gold tinted surface.
Maybe if she just checked in on them. Even if she had to technically break in to see how they were, to see them without their masks in place and their walls up to hide their potential vulnerability from her, it wasn't bad to want to make sure the pain she'd inflicted hadn't been too damaging, right? Although, she didn't need to sneak in through the back door so her reasoning was probably flawed. She only needed to use it if she thought it would keep any neighbors or late night dog walkers from seeing her enter the house in case they decided to report suspicious activity. Or worse, call Regina directly.
With a flick of the wrist, gray smoke swirled around the lock and it clicked open just as the remnants of her magic faded. She slowly and quietly pushed open the door and tiptoed inside a nearly pitch black room. All the lights were off in whatever room she'd just walked into and it didn't sound like anyone was close by. She tensed her shoulders as she carefully shut the door behind her and relocked it just in case Regina came down while she was still inside the house.
She ran that thought through her head one more time and realized that yes, her reasoning was definitely flawed. She was stalking Regina and Henry and she knew what she was doing was wrong, so wrong, but that didn't keep her from moving further into the house.
Her movements were slow and deliberate as she tried to not only be quiet but to also avoid bumping into anything. Like the dining room table.
"Shit," she hissed as she stubbed her foot against one of the legs. Her toes tingled in the worst way inside her boot and she gritted her teeth as they throbbed in pain. A long moment passed before it lessened just enough for her to continue her trek through the house.
Other than that small outburst, she was quiet as she walked toward the front of the house and peeked up the winding staircase before she crept her way up the steps. All the doors on the main floor were closed and no light shined through the cracks under them so Emma thought she would find Regina upstairs where she already knew Henry was.
She was right. There was only one light on upstairs and she was almost one hundred percent sure it wasn't Henry's. She was proven right again when she heard sniffles from behind the closed door as she approached the room. She immediately frowned and froze in place just a few steps away from standing directly in front of the door.
She didn't need to know which Mills might have been crying or why to know with absolute certainty that she'd fucked up.
When she poofed into the confined space Zelena was forced to stay in with that bulky, magic-hindering cuff, Emma saw the redhead crossed legged and comfortable on her cot despite the lack of onion rings she desired and the opportunity to stretch her legs that Emma figured she would enjoy.
"Trust me, if anyone knows what it's like to be pregnant behind bars it's me," she said in place of a greeting.
"Dark Swan," Zelena replied with a low and almost breathless kind of voice. "To what do I owe this honor?"
"Just wanted to have a little chat."
Zelena's scowled and said, "Afraid I'm not in the mood."
Emma engulfed them in her magic and wordlessly welcomed Zelena into her new home with two bags of Granny's takeout. It wasn't a nice stroll in what was probably much needed fresh air, but Emma wasn't going to parade around town with Zelena by her side. Her house was the only place the two of them could go if they wanted to get out of the psych ward and keep Emma's plans from public knowledge.
She smiled at Zelena as she retrieved and then held out a large order of onion rings to the other woman. Zelena's eyes immediately fell to the warm, greasy food and Emma's smile curled into a grin just before the food was snatched out of her hands.
"I suppose I could listen," Zelena said and took a seat at the table with her eyes mostly fixated on the onion rings. "So tell me, what kind of trouble do you want to get into?"
Zelena smirked and was seemingly happy to help, at least if it meant disaster. In all the time Emma had known her she'd have to guess that was the woman's middle name.
Zelena devoured both bags worth of takeout—well, almost all of both bags—before Emma finally attempted to share her plan with the redheaded Mills.
"Eat up. Dark One's don't judge," she said.
Zelena chuckled and dropped the onion ring she was about to pop into her mouth. It wasn't that the woman was self-conscious because Emma was sure she wasn't, but it appeared Zelena didn't prefer her snippy way of getting down to business.
"Despite these greasy treats, I know this isn't a social call," Zelena said and wiped her hands off on a napkin before she balled it up and tossed it onto the table with a brief frown. The fleeting look of what Emma could only describe as slightly upset on Zelena's face confused her. It was like the other woman had hoped there was more to Emma's kindness than bribing Zelena to do something for her, which was insane because why the hell else would Emma take the woman back to her place and give her the one meal Zelena craved?
Well, when she thought about it like that... Maybe taking Zelena home was a bit much?
"What is it you want," Zelena growled.
"Direct. I like that. Take a look at this," Emma said before she even had time to process how much that kind of sounded like a come-on even in monotone.
She made a wand materialize in her hand and Zelena frowned as she cocked her head to the side. She pouted her lips and looked over the wand for a moment, but when she met Emma's gaze again she surprisingly didn't have a comment.
"What," Emma asked, a little frustrated.
"No, nothing. I just thought... Why do you need the Apprentice's wand?"
"You're the only one who's wielded Merlin's magic and lived to tell about it."
"Aww. Well, it's nice to be appreciated," Zelena smiled and nodded. "But that's not what I meant."
"It isn't?"
"I assumed you wanted to talk to me about Regina."
"Regina? Why would I come to you about her?"
"Interestingly enough, the patient that's fancies a mop loves to talk and I heard how you ripped out that young girl's heart to break your son's." She laughed and leaned forward in her chair. "Kudos. I mean, that is like next level darkness. Well done."
Emma didn't know why, but suddenly she was flattered. She grinned and felt her cheeks heat up a little as she looked away for a moment. When she realized that the darkness had twisted her emotions into something wildly inappropriate, she inwardly chastised herself and then shook her head. "You think you have any right to judge after all the things you've done?"
Zelena sobered up and confessed, "No, but as someone who's been on the receiving end of a mother's betrayal, I know those feelings of hurt don't go away. They fester. So have fun with a lifetime of resentment. And I can only assume how pissed Regina must be."
"They'll forgive me. They just need time."
Zelena's stare intensified as her voice dropped to a low timbre and for some reason it had an odd effect on Emma. "Even with all the time in the world, some things can't be forgiven."
"I don't believe that."
Zelena leaned forward again and smiled as she tilted her head to the side and looked Emma up and down. She bit her bottom lip before their eyes met again and Zelena said, "I killed Neal."
Emma clenched her fist on the table, hoped the other woman didn't notice, and let her eyes wander to that recently bitten lip of hers. Emma never knew if Zelena saw her make a fist, but she knew the redhead had seen where Emma's focus went as soon as she saw Zelena knowingly grin at her.
"Ready to kiss and make up?"
It wasn't supposed to feel like electricity in her veins; a shock to her heart and her clit. It wasn't supposed to be so alluring, the taste of pink lips and the flutter of long lashes against her skin as their bodies entwined under the sheets or against a wall.
Before Emma even knew what she was doing, she surged forward and kissed Zelena. The other woman was in no way forgiven for the things she'd done. She'd killed innocent people just because she could and had hurt Regina because it served two purposes that were both just as wickedly selfish as the other. No matter how dark Emma was or how cold and black her heart became, Emma wasn't about to say all that the consequences of all of Zelena's misdeeds were fixed. Because they weren't. Zelena hadn't earned Emma's forgiveness or her kindness or her kisses, but their mouths were fused and their tongues darted past parted lips to play.
She felt liquid heat between her legs and squirmed in her seat where she was bent forward at the waist to stay connected to the other woman before she felt hands on her thighs travel up toward her hips. She lost herself for a moment. She didn't think about anything and just allowed herself to feel. It seemed like the first time in a long time that Emma felt less suck-ish and frustrated and she wanted more. She needed more.
The waistband of her tight black pants were tugged at until she slid off her chair and onto the other woman's lap. Her thighs squeezed a thin waist and her knees pressed into the back of the chair while her fingers tangled in bouncy curls. She moaned into the next kiss and felt hands grip her ass. Those same hands pulled her closer and her hips rolled against the woman's stomach as a result. She pulled away from the kiss with a gasp and dipped her head to trail kisses along a rapidly beating pulse point before she bit down and sucked.
When her tongue flicked over the faint mark she left behind, she heard a throaty moan and one of the hands on her ass slid up her side and under her leather jacket. Knuckles pushed the jacket up with the movement and Emma felt a breeze along her back and ribs. In response, Emma kissed a spot she quickly realized was an extremely sensitive one beneath the other woman's ear. The evidence that the particular spot Emma had chosen was sensitive was a long and higher pitched moan louder than the first as more of the woman's neck became available to attack.
Emma pushed a sleeve off the other woman's shoulder and the hand that neared her breast let go to shake the sweater sleeve the rest of the way off. Before the woman could touch her again, Emma moved a hand between her own legs and grabbed the hem of a soft T-shirt and pulled it up to the other woman's chest. She slipped her fingers under the bra that impeded a more fluid maneuver than the one she managed and felt a nipple stiffen beneath her fingertips.
"Yes," the other woman whispered in encouragement before Emma felt a hand slide into her pants.
Just as the hand grazed all the right places, Emma whimpered into her ear, "Regina."
The hand stilled and Emma's eyes shot wide open. She instantly realized her mistake. Except it wasn't a mistake. The name she'd moaned hadn't been wrong, but the person she'd been rounding all the bases with was.
Emma pulled back and looked into blue eyes that, in that moment, looked as deep as an ocean.
"Wow. Are you trying for a personal best," Zelena asked. Emma recognized a brief look of hurt flash across the redhead's face before she hid it behind a mask of haughtiness and added, "First your son and now an imprisoned pregnant woman. Not to mention how my dear sis is gonna feel once she finds out we almost—"
"Shut up," Emma insisted while she stood up and wiped the back of her hand across her lips.
Zelena laughed. "That really is some remarkable commitment to the darkness. What else have you got?"
She scowled at the other woman and raised a hand to poof Zelena back to her cell, but the redhead held up a finger and started to speak again.
"Just one question before you throw me back in my cage. Did you really not know how you felt about Regina until just now?"
"What do you mean how I feel about her?"
Zelena's eyes widened and her mouth twisted into a wide, amused smile. "You can't be serious. Do you really think it doesn't mean anything that you said her name?"
"I just had her on my mind at the time."
Zelena expectantly raised an eyebrow as if to silently urge Emma to see her point.
"That's not what I—I don't love her!"
"No," Zelena dramatically feigned agreement. "No, of course not. Except…I didn't say love. You did."
Emma wanted to slap that damn smirk off Zelena's face.
"Honestly, I don't know why you won't just tell her," Zelena nonchalantly added a moment later and slouched a little in her chair. "She'll never dump poor Robin until you admit it."
"Wha—This is ridiculous," Emma shook herself out of whatever thoughts Zelena clearly wanted her to entertain.
"Thank you," Zelena agreed with immense relief, and that time the consensus was real. "Now you're starting to get it."
"No," Emma squeezed her eyes shut. It wasn't until that moment that she finally understood why Regina had magically, and frequently, shut the woman up during their time in Camelot. "I'm not going to tell her because there's nothing to tell."
Zelena scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Fine. The two of you can keep avoiding your feelings for the rest of your lives." She sighed. "The one time I actually try to do something nice and this is what I get. Mark my words, you'll come to me again and next time it won't be about some silly wand."
"I can give you freedom. And protection from Regina and anyone else that might want to harm you," she offered, which she would have done before they kissed. But timing was a bitch sometimes.
"No. I'm not going to make a deal with you. I've helped you all I can."
"We both know that's not true."
"You're right," Zelena said and then corrected herself. "I could do more, but why should I when you're ungrateful and won't even help yourself?"
"Because some time from now, maybe days, maybe weeks or months, you're going to need an ally in this town and you will come to me seeking what I can offer you."
"I don't think so, Emma. You see, the difference between you and me is…I don't mind being alone."
Emma's lips parted ever so slightly with the weight of Zelena's statement, because unfortunately for her the witch was right. Emma didn't want to be alone.
"No."
"I haven't even said hello."
"Whatever you want, Miss Swan, you won't get it from me. Or Henry. Now leave." Regina almost shut the door in Emma's face again, but she stuck her foot in the door and barged inside behind the brunette. Regina wasn't happy about it.
Emma didn't explain herself or apologize to make Regina feel better about her unwanted presence. Instead, she just closed the front door and looked up to make sure Henry wasn't at the top of the stairs listening in on their conversation. Regina seemed to notice and looked up at the empty second floor landing before she said, "He's not here. He's with your parents."
"Right." She took a quick look around the foyer for a moment in case there was someone else in the house, a certain someone that smelled like forest and clung to Regina like dog shit stuck to the bottom of a shoe, before her eyes locked on Regina. She immediately noticed the eyeshadow and darker application of eyeliner. She hadn't worn that much makeup since she was the Evil Queen and Emma had the mental images burned into her brain from her experience with time travel to prove it. The color might have matched Regina's blue dress—a blue dress with an insanely high zipper in a tantalizing place—but it didn't fit right on the brunette anymore. Not unless her evening plans involved going to a night club or the Rabbit Hole.
"I know what I did was wrong," Emma blurted out.
"Interesting. That sounds like an apology and yet I feel a 'but' coming on."
"No. No 'but.' Just this. I thought I was doing what needed to be done—" Regina was about to say something, but Emma stopped her before she could interrupt. "But you were right. There was a choice. There is a choice. I don't—I think I forgot. I forgot that maybe there was more that could be done than what I was seeing and I didn't ask for help. So I lied and I hurt the people I love and—and I want to come home."
Regina blinked, her mouth open as she stared at Emma in complete shock. "But…how? You're already here. How would you—"
Emma stepped closer and shook her head. "Home isn't a place. Not to me it isn't."
Regina looked confused and took a step back for every step Emma took forward.
"You've had my back," Emma continued and moved closer and closer to Regina each second. "You've been the one to try to keep me steady and you weren't pushing when you thought it wouldn't help. Until last night. Last night, you pushed."
"I was upset."
"And you have every right to be."
In the next two steps, Regina was backed against a wall and her breath ghosted over Emma's lips.
"You were right to push me then," Emma added. "And I should have seen it sooner, but the important thing is I see it now."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"I think I know how to fix this," she said and then leaned in. She closed her eyes and heard Regina's breath hitch before she pressed their lips together in a careful and chaste kiss.
A burst of light washed over them and took their breath away, or in Regina's case what little breath she had left to lose. Emma opened her eyes and found brown eyes staring back at her. They were full of emotion and even more confusion than there had been before their kiss. Emma was about to smile and crack a joke about what just happened when she felt her skin tingle. She looked down at her hands and watched the bronze glimmer fade from them. Her complexion returned to its normal state and she felt a warmth in her chest she hadn't felt in weeks.
"How did you…?" Regina never finished her question. She let it hang in the space between them as she searched Emma's eyes for something. Emma wasn't sure what she was looking for, but for some reason she didn't understand she hoped the other woman found whatever it was. "Show me the dagger."
Emma frowned, but pulled it out of her jacket. Her eyes widened as she noticed what was different. Regina turned the dagger over to see exactly what had amazed her. The blade was wiped free of any name.
"You're not the Dark One anymore," Regina said a few seconds before she looked up and met Emma's gaze.
"And…and your memories," Emma hesitantly asked. "The curse?"
"You—I… We broke it. I remember everything," Regina breathlessly confessed.
Emma waited for the other shoe to drop, waited for Regina to yell at her or hit her or tell her to get the hell out of Storybrooke and never come back. But Regina didn't do any of those things. Instead, she completely threw Emma off guard and pulled the blonde in by the lapels of her leather jacket.
Regina crashed their lips together and kissed her like everyone's fate depended on a fiery display of affection, public or not.
That time she knew who was kissing. That time she knew it wasn't a mistake. That time she knew she was right where she needed to be.
"Damn," Emma said when they pulled apart for air. "I was definitely kissing the wrong Mills."
"What," Regina asked with a frown.
Emma sucked in a deep breath and prepared for the worst as she quickly confessed, "Ikindofalmostsleptwithyoursister."
"You what?!" Regina's eyes bulged and the vein in her forehead became pronounced before her chest heaved with shallow, angry breathing. A few seconds later, she relaxed and slipped into her overly charming, but actually evil, politician mask as her lips curled into a smile. Then Emma was the one to back up every time Regina stepped forward as the brunette stalked her like prey until the brunette was ready to pounce. "I promise you, Miss Swan, by the time I'm through with you you'll never question which Mills is the right Mills ever again."
Emma accidentally backed herself up against the round table in the middle of the foyer and her hand accidentally swatted at the bouquet of flowers that resided on it. The vase smashed to pieces on the floor, but Regina didn't hesitate to lift her onto the recently cleared table and kiss her hard. Emma melted into the kiss and wrapped her legs around Regina's waist. There was only one thought on her mind then.
It's good to be home.