Artemis Fowl and teh Scroll of Doom
Disclaimer: I own teh Scroll of Doom, nothing else. ;)
Summary: Uproar! Artemis Fowl, aged two months has been kidnapped! No ransom demand has come through; it is as if he has disappeared without a trace. But deep underground..a deep secret- Bah, fine, it's the fairies who kidnapped him!
A/N: My first AF fanfic, intended for humorous purposes only.
Enough of my ramblings.
-Darth Maximus
Prologue: Meet the Characters.
"Holly!"
Holly spun around to the source of the voice, and came face to face to a screen showing one particular centaur's face.
"Holly, Julius wants you at the Police Plaza now. Apparently, it's an 'urgent' matter," Foaly spoke smugly. Holly belted on her Neutrino 3000 and promptly tripped over her sofa.
"Great, just great," she muttered sarcastically. She turned off the screen and exited the house.
"Gentlemen," LEPrecon Commander Julius Root began. "We believe there is reason to take a particular Mud Boy and use him to suit our needs."
Chaos ensued.
"WHAT?!"
"WHAT?!"
"HUH?"
"WHAAAA ?"
Foaly snorted.
Julius Root sighed. He had expected something like this. He took a deep breath, and continued.
"Major Trouble Kelp, Major Maxwell Pork, Captain Holly Short, Captain Tobias Heater, Corporal Douglas Fishe, Corporal Jashin Fugly and a Retrieval Squad will kidnap an Artemis Fowl for our intents and purposes," he said in one breath. Six faces looked at him with strange expressions on their faces. Root reddened.
"FINE. I'll tell you why we need the Mud Boy. He has shown remarkable genius at the tender age of two months, saying his first word, 'Artemisrules.'"
Maxwell interrupted him.
"Isn't that two words?" he queried. Julius nodded his head sagely as Foaly snickered.
"What old Julie here is trying to say, is that the Council thinks that if this Fowl works with moi, and my supreme intellect, we shall be able to find the legendary Scroll of Dooooom!" Foaly explained as if talking to three year olds.
"Don't call me Ju-"
"The Scroll of Doom?" Tobias interrupted Julius' protests. Foaly rolled his eyes and stamped his feet in mock anger.
"No no, not the Scroll of Doom, but the legendary Scroll of Dooooom!" he struck a pose. This time, all members rolled their eyes at Foaly's stupidity.
"Who exactly agrees to this mission?" Douglas asked suspiciously. Julius, attempting to regain his dignity, replied.
"We have the full approval of the Council with the go-ahead," he replied with supreme satisfaction, but that look fell when Jashin put her hands on her hips.
"When exactly are we leaving?" she said ominously, with a murderous look. If looks could kill, then Julius Root would be eating a pork. What? No!
"When exactly are we leaving?" she said ominously, with a murderous look aimed at Julius. Julius shivered. Wing Commander Vinyàya chose that moment to enter the room.
"You will be leaving in approximately..." she checked her watch. "In five seconds."
Chaos ensued.
Nonononono...wait..Chaos didn't ensue!
"Wait a moment," she said. "My watch appears to be malfunctioning. Foaaaly!!"
She regained her serious look.
"Foaly will suit you up with all the equipment and will debrief you on what you need to do," she continued. "Good luck."
With that, she left the room with Julius running after her with a bouquet of roses, leaving the stunned elves with Foaly.
"Excellent, excellent," Foaly murmured, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "Meet your newest friend, the invention 'Pogo Stick v2'.
A/N: Like it? Hate it? Please let me know! I love clicking blue buttons too!! hugs