A/N -So this is a one-shot that came to me while reading some stories about these two and this moment. I was overwhelmed to find how many stories there are, that condition Shay being a lesbian to her having been previously assaulted or attacked. As though she can't "just be gay". Anyway, I hope this allows for something else. Sorry for the didactic tone. Hope you enjoy. Comments are welcome. Picpicpic

Disclaimer: I do not own any part or character of Chicago Fire. The quote at the beginning was taken from the series' script, season 1 chapter 19. There's another quote in there from season 3, chapter 1.

Plan C

When the time is right, you go into your room with magazines or Skinemax or whatever you need to get yourself ready.

And then with the lights out, you signal me by calling out my name once.

You'll hear your door open, footsteps.

And then you'll be mounted.

You will finish your business inside of me as quickly and efficiently as possible.

And then I'll be out the door, so you can clean up or whatever you need to do.

At which point, I will need to be alone.

Most likely to cry.

And we will never speak of this to anyone ever for the rest of our lives.

It was going as planned, sort of. He'd called her name, she came in and was currently on top of him, mentally preparing herself to slip him into her. He can feel her terror, her body rigid with fear and disgust at the thought of what they were doing but he doesn't dare move.

His hands at his sides, he lets her find her way in the dark, her courage, her pace. Slowly she lifts herself up and shifts to line herself with his erection. She then lowers herself on to him, a soft sob escaping her lips. He can't fight his physical reactions when his cock twitches inside her but he wouldn't call this is a good experience. He can feel her every move and emotion as she takes a moment to get used to the feel of him inside her. She's crying and simultaneously holding her breath.

Looking at her in the dark, it breaks his heart. So when she puts a hand on his chest to stabilize herself, he lays a hand on hers. "Shay,"

"No," her voice is small and frightened. "please don't,"

"It doesn't have to be like this," he answers in a similar low whisper.

"I feel like I'm raping you," she blurts out, sobbing uncontrollably. He now KNOWS he has to do something, no end could ever justify these means.

"God, Shay, no. You're not. I promise you I want this baby too but it doesn't have to be like this. Climb off for a moment, let's talk about this."

"No, let's finish and never talk about this again."

"No Shay, get off, I'm turning the light on. You have a shirt on, right? I'm turning the light on."

"No!" but it was no use, as he helps her off of him, he holds her wrist in his hand, preventing her from fleeing and with the other, he turns on the night lamp and the room fills with a soft yellow glow. He can see her clearly now, folded into a ball at his side, trying to avoid everything about him.

"Shay, look at me," he requests quietly but she shakes her head. "Shay, please," with his free hand he reaches and lays a finger under her chin, raising her face till her eyes meet his. "Hey, it's me. it's me." he knows she knows what he means, "I would never do anything to hurt you, you know that, right?" She nods silently, a ghost of a smile on her face. "Do you trust me?"

"In bed? Are you insane? Do you not know you?" her tone is quick and harsh but he can sense her sense of humor bubbling underneath and he knows they've made progress.

"Shay, if we want a baby, we have to do this. But it doesn't have to be this horrible experience,"

"How do you know?" she cuts in, "have you ever had sex with a man?" she means it as a joke, a sting, a provocation to give her some time and control but to her surprise, he doesn't answer immediately. Rather, something changes in his expression, and for a tiny moment, his gaze waivers. "What?! Kelly! What the? When? Who?" she's now laughing in disbelief.

"This doesn't leave this bed." He says sternly and waits for her nod of agreement. Then he relaxes back a bit, his voice calm and noncommittal, "End of college, it was a 'don't knock it till you try it' kind of thing, he was a mate on the football team, hot, even the straight guy that am, I could see he was hot. And as gay as they come. So, you see, sex with a man doesn't have to be a traumatic experience. And I say that from experience." He smirks at her.

"Well color me impressed. Fuck."

"We're trying to Shay. Now listen, I've done some research,"

"Oh?"

"Yeah, apparently, there is a position that's most efficient to get pregnant and I think you might find it less awful because you don't actually have to see me."

"What? You mean from behind? Like a bitch on all fours? Dream on Kelly, that's one fantasy I'm not fulfilling."

"No, no. Jeez, Shay, will you relax. Listen, I know this is hard, no pun intended," he adds quickly as her eyebrows shoot up, "but we agreed this is the way we want to do it and I'm trying here. Listen, yes, from behind, no, not on all fours. On our sides, like spooning." He lets the information sink in. "It's not that different from when we slept in the same bed and you've already felt how it feels me being inside you, so it won't be as bad. And if it is, I'll stop. Say the word and I'll stop and we'll figure out another way to pay for the insemination, I promise. So, what do you say? Will you give it, me, one more shot?"

She takes a moment to look into his eyes, trying to find the catch, trying to read his emotions. But all she can see is respect and hope and love. And she realizes it's exactly what she feels for him. Slowly she turns her back to him, snuggling into a fetus shape against him.

"Okay, I'm going to the toilet to regroup and when I'm ready, I'll come back. Try and relax," he says softly, kissing her cheek. "Oh, and there are magazines under the bed if you're interested. I found some new chick-on-chick zine thing, just in case," she can't help but laugh with him as he leaves the bed to the en-suite.

A few minutes later, she can hear him open the door and enter the room. Crossing towards the bed, he turns off the light, taking a second to get used to the dark. Her breath hitches as he climbs into the bed, scooting closer to her. She waits in anticipation for his next move, preparing herself for the feel of his erection against her.

To her surprise, it's his lips that meet her skin as he softly kisses her shoulder blade and back. His fingers gently caressing along her spine, he then follows with his lips. Slowly, his hand makes its way between her thighs, stroking lightly, until she lets him separate her legs. His hand lightly shifting her thigh back to lay on his, as his fingers return to find her clit.

"Kelly," a gasp escapes her lips, but this time it isn't fear he hears but wonder.

"Shhh, it's okay, Shay," he whispers back, his lips finding her neck as his fingers softly stroke her clit, applying light pressure, "close your eyes, imagine I'm someone else if you want." He's taken aback by her response, though she does close her eyes, she searches for his other arm, holding his hand tightly in hers as she encircles herself with his arm, bringing his palm to her lips and kissing it.

Taking this as a sign to move on, he delicately stretches a finger down her vagina, slipping lightly in when he finds her wet and ready. She grunts softly with what he hopes is more pleasure than discomfort. Up until now, these were parts of sex she would have been used to. Now came the tricky part. He snuggles closer to her, pressing his erection against her body, making his progression clear to her. But he doesn't feel any resistance from her so he slowly slides inside her, giving her a moment to get used to it, with his other arm he tightens his hold on her against him.

He wants to whisper in her ear, tell her that he loves her, that this is an act of love that would lead to their baby, that he's happy to have this experience bind them together, but he isn't sure it wouldn't freak her out, so he bites his tongue and begins a slow rhythm inside her. It's then he notices her tension come back, she's holding her breath again. "You okay?" he whispers in her ear, "you want to stop?" he can feel more than see her shaking her head, a silent tear dropping from the corner of her eye onto his arm.

"No, I'm fine," She whispers, squeezing his hand, "Go on."

"Breath, Shay, we're almost done." He says to her ear as he resumes his thrusts, "I'll go a little quicker and then hopefully we'll get there soon." He figures letting her know what was going to happen would ease her discomfort and is surprised to find her giggling.

"This is ridiculous," she suddenly says, and he can feel her relax a bit, suddenly gaining some perspective. "I love you, I know you love me and we're making a baby."

"Yes, Shay," he says, her words and newfound soundness encouraging him on,

"Come on, let's just get this over with," she says, her tone now plain and accepting and to his surprise, she guides his fingers back to her clit, letting him stroke her as he raises the rhythm up a notch.

"Tell me what I can do," he whispers in her ear, turned on by the sudden change in her and the sound of her voice.

"Nothing," she whispers back automatically, trying to avoid needing him or enjoying this in any way but then she adds, "just, climb a little higher," she swallows, trying to compose herself, "so you can go a little deeper. And, you don't have to be so gentle with your fingers on me, just, go wild."

He's completely surprised by her response, realizing he's getting a peek into Shay's sexual preferences, finding it an extreme turn on, he quickly complies. Realizing, just like everything else that makes them best friends, she's very much like him in bed, her sharp wit and sassiness in daily life turn into bold exploring in bed. She knows what she wants and how to get there.

Boldened by her ease, he picks up the rhythm even further, pinching her clit lightly between his fingers, he hears her gasp in pleasure as her head falls back. He can feel the gathering pull at the pit of his stomach and knows that he's close. "You ready?" he whispers in her ear.

Her eyes shoot open to look at him, her head nodding and he can't stop himself from kissing her. Without thinking their lips join and open toward each other, their tongues finding their way into the other's mouth. Sucking on her tongue he silently conveys to her the magnitude of this moment for him, the sheer happiness he feels to be doing this with her.

"Sorry," he says as he pulls back, suddenly ashamed of his inability to control himself, realizing kissing was an intimate action irrelevant to the task at hand, one she wouldn't necessarily want.

"Don't be," she whispers back, her nose scrunching with concentration as she feels the wave of pleasure building inside her.

"Can you do me a favor and take over for me?" he asks, meaning his fingers on her clit, "and then I can tend to myself so we'll come together."

He can see the confusion in her eyes, "No, don't," she's not sure what he's doing with his fingers, but the thought of losing that contact drives her insane, "I'll do you, tell me what to do, just, please don't stop what you're doing," she pants her answer and he smirks lightly, his eyebrows rising in surprise.

"You sure? Male parts and all?" she nods decisively, and he can see a blush rising in her cheeks.

"Okay, stretch your hand down and find my balls, and when you feel you're going to come, just squeeze them, not too hard though, that will finish me off for sure."

She hesitates for a moment and then he feels her hand brushing against him on its way down. He's not sure he even needs it anymore, the sensations and talking about it, overwhelming him. He can feel her hand find its place, her fingers fleeting against his testicles at her opening.

"Wait," he grunts, "only when you're ready, otherwise it will be too soon."

They keep their rhythm for a few seconds longer, no more than a minute, his fingers madly circling against her clit, and around her nipple, driving her wild. She suddenly bucks against him, her hand cupping around his balls and squeezing lightly.

"Kelly," she pants.

"Shay," he pants in response.

"Shit, Kelly, I'm coming" and with a final grunt, he matches her convulsions and releases into her, gasping and panting against her ear.

It takes them a short while to come down, get their breath and heart rates in check, he then pulls out of her, unsure what she wants to do next. He lies there on his back, breathing, letting the experience roll over him.

He finds he's surprised by their encounter, happy and content, hoping it won't become too weird and uncomfortable. It was a good experience, damn, it was okay sex, it shouldn't mar their friendship but make it stronger. He's afraid to look at her and realize her experience was different, but he wants to make sure she's okay.

"You okay?" he asks quietly, his eyes to the ceiling, "You need to be alone? You want me to leave?"

She can hear the insecurity in his voice and though it takes her a moment to answer, she eventually turns to him, laying her head on his shoulder, "No, I'm fine. Just need to, uh, rest my eyes for a moment. You?"

"I'm good," he says, turning his head to kiss the top of her head. "That wasn't too bad, was it?" he asks carefully.

"No, I guess not." She answers quietly, feeling his smirk expanding against her hair. "Put it back in your pants, Lieutenant. I'm still gay. Hopefully, we've just created a baby and we'll never have to try that again. But it wasn't all bad and now I know what every woman in Chicago is on about."

"Ha, you haven't seen the half of it," he laughs lightly with her. He then finds her hand and brings it to his lips, kissing it quickly, "Thank you, though, for trusting me. I'm really happy we did this. Especially if it results in a baby. And if not, I'm open to trying again. There are plenty of other positions…" he chuckles.

"I knew that position thing was not a thing, you probably saw it in some late-night TV show!"

"No! Anyway, it worked didn't it, we got there at the end, pleasurably rather than painfully, I might add. Now enough of this. You stay lying, I'll grab a quick shower and order in. Chinese? Thai? Pizza? Your pick."

"Ah, what a gentleman you are. I knew I chose right. Pizza. And a movie?"

"Sure," he says as he gets up from the bed and walks toward the en-suite, "meet you down there in a few."

But when he comes back, out of the shower, wrapped in a towel, she's still in his bead, snoring ever so lightly, a sweet smile spread across her sleeping features.