This was supposed to be a Mass Effect/ Naruto Crossover. The first chapter acting as the Prologue taking place during Mass Effect 2, then from the second chapter onward it would have took place during Mass Effect 3 where the real story would have started.
The Pairing would have been: Naruto/Solana Vakarian plus one chosen by the readers of either Turian, Asari, Human or Quarian Race.
Excluding Tali, Aria, Liara and the Asari Councillor, of course. OC would have been okay, Less-used characters too...Even an OC Ardat-Yakshi would have been fine, I bet the blond bastard could fuck one and live to tell the tale and even have a normal relationship with 'her'!
You know he totally can, he is stubborn like that! (and would make the story funnier in my opinion).
" You bastard" - demon talking / jutsu
"Let's finish this" - dialogue
" Can it get any worse? " - during flashback/thoughts
His companions (His 'Crew') are mostly OCs of the various species of Mass Effect I hoped to manage to keep in tone with their "Canon" counterparts.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or whatever I will use here in this fic.
I preferred dealing with Missing-Nin instead of Aliens! Chap 1: Prologue.
Orbit around Palaven – Turian frigate 'The Eyes' – Quarters -
A lone, grey-skinned turian (Six feet tall, avian-like creatures with two long, proportionately thick fingers and an opposable thumb on each hand each tipped with talons and a set of mandibles around their mouths and metallic carapace-like skin) was standing in silence while looking at the infinite carpet of stars outside while the frigate he was on rapidly left the atmosphere of Palaven, sighing in annoyance at being forced to leave his home with the shortest notice once summoned by his race temporary representative in the Citadel.
"Captain Quentius?" a voice asked from outside.
"Enter." Quentius answered sharply without looking away from his window.
"Vilius Bellsis here for report, sir." the young Turian said standing to attention as soon as he entered the man's quarters.
"Speak, soldier. What news do you have that needed you to come all the way here when I clearly said I didn't want to be disturbed?" Quentius asked with only a tinge of annoyance surfacing from his tone.
"I have...News from the scouting you requested, sir. About the 'Side Research' you wanted me and few others to go through without anyone else knowing about." Vilius answered uncertain.
"Oh? What is it then?" the older Turian asked now clearly interested and finally turning to look at the other's face.
"The Salarians, sir...They may have found some new 'Toy'. He had made a mess in a small Mercenary settlement on a remote planet and got the attention of some of them...he and his Krogan pall."
"A new toy?" the Captain asked curious.
"Apparently he is kind of 'Different' from any other human, sir." Vilius answered uncertain.
"A human that is different...how so?"
"We could not get every detail as the Salarians are good at keeping their files safe, but he got the 'Friendship' of that Krogan by giving him a concussion...through head-butting as per the Krogan's request, then both seemingly got on a spree and proceeded to see who could beat more Mercenaries to submission unharmed."
"So he is a dead human? Why should he be interesting?" Quentius asked slightly disappointed, having the audacity of accept that kind of challenge from a Krogan and succeed was something curious, but being also that suicidal to go unharmed against who knows how many mercen-
"No, Sir. He and the Krogan are very much alive and kicking as the Salarian had troubles keeping both still and study the human, the dead ones have been all the others." Vilius corrected.
"Oh!" the Captain could only nod a little in surprise, now that was more interesting.
"But I still don't see why this would be worth our time."
"Well, Sir. Both the Human and the Krogan seem to be looking for employment, no question asked other than compensation and both food and a place to sleep. Neither of the two seem to be too much interested in their respective home-world or race. And you asked us to see if some 'Outsiders' could be found to work for you." the young Turian answered.
"I see. We'll need to see if they are reliable though, and capable." Quentius hummed interested.
"If I can be so bold, Captain."
"Speak it out, soldier."
"I think those two must be both very good and very crazy. They have just one hour ago escaped confinement, stole a ship and were last seen moving towards the Citadel with the whole crew of said ship held as hostage. That's why I hurried here to inform you." Vilius answered uncertain.
"Oh. We too have been called to the Citadel, see if you and the others can find them in there, I want to talk with them in person." the Turian Captain ordered.
"Yessir!" the other answered before hurrying out.
The following day – The Citadel – Purgatory Bar -
"And then that blond bastard grabs that guy by the leg and uses his whole body as a mace to beat this one guard on the head! I am talking about a human using an adult Krogan as an improvised weapon to beat another Krogan submission! Priceless!" a broad, amber-eyed and dark-purple-skinned, seven feet tall creature (A Krogan) said laughing uproariously while downing his latest drink.
"What Garky fails to add is that while I was doing this he had the Captain of the Frigate in a choke-hold and was slamming the poor bastard's head on the main controls. So he too was not playing nice." the blond human with the Krogan added laughing himself.
"Don't call me, Garky! I am Garkan Jarro and as I live and breath I will take over the Urdnot Clan, if I follow you around is just because like you I need a job for money and resources." Garkan answered annoyed.
"Aye-aye! I know that, I am just 'A means to an end' and all that crap!" the human answered amused while emptying his glass.
"Be as it may, you two were a problem to sort out without C-Sec interfering. Here, your new IDs and papers to stay in the Citadel, just don't make me regret helping you this time as well." the Asari with the two answered annoyed while tossing both fugitives said objects.
"You hurt me, Aria-chan! I did so much for you in the past and this is how you treat me? All cold and distant?" the human answered pouting.
"When my men brought you to me as my new recruit, you barely knew what Languages were mostly talked in the Galaxy or what another planet outside of Earth looked like...even if from what you told me, Earth as well was not the same as you remembered, Naruto." Aria T'loak answered ignoring his whining.
"And look where I got in a couple of years! You should be proud! Without you I would still be sealed inside the Moon! All those millenniums with Kaguya as my only company outside Kurama was not nice," he answered amused.
"Fuck you." a echoing female voice answered inside the man's head.
"Oh, do shut up for once, woman!" a second, and deeper, voice answered growling in annoyance.
"Whatever, see to not get into more trouble. You are starting to not be worth it any more." Aria answered walking away followed by her men.
"Always angry that Asari." Garkan said bored as he downed another glass emptying the bottle in front of him.
"Let her vent, I am satisfied by knowing that she still helped us when I asked and the fact that she knows I would help her if she needs me." Naruto answered.
"Uh! And nothing else?"
"Well, the knowledge of being still able to give her multiple screaming orgasms also helps digesting her attitude, no matter how much she denies liking what I can do to her when we are intimate." the blond human added smirking.
"Are all the humans that depraved? I swear that they day you grow a quad I'll start walking with my back glued to the wall." the Krogan said grumbling.
"I am an old-school human! The last one remaining after those self-righteous bastards 'Genetically Reseted' my planet back into Stone Age, we used to be more badass and honest with ourselves back in the days. And I got trained by a Super Pervert in my youth, that too helped...And I don't do dudes, Krogan especially."
"Well, that's a relief...Wait! Are you saying that Krogans are not good enough for you?!" Garkan hissed angrily.
"Don't even try to go there, buddy."
"NO! I am exactly going there! We are-"
"Your arguing is fun, almost comical. But I have to interrupt." a third voice said speaking very fast.
"What's a Salarian doing here!? I don't like your kind!" the Krogan growled jumping to his feet with bared teeth.
"WOH-WOH! Calm down!" Naruto said moving between the two to stop the possible brawl.
"I come in peace, I have a request to do in exchange of help." the new-comer said nonplussed.
The Salarian was a bipedal being with tall, elongated body and a long and thin head with a pair of horns protruding from the top of the skull; the skin seemed to be a 'blend' of blue and grey with each color taking over depending on the light; the curious thing was that both his arms looked robotic with the dull-grey colour of the metal standing-out from the tone of his skin.
What unnerved Naruto was how the guy's eyes (wide slit, oriented horizontally) kept scanning him from head to toe ominously reflecting the blond's face in his dark-brown orbits.
Oh, and apparently Salarians blinked upwards, that was always extra creepy too for him.
"You know why I don't like them!" Garkan hissed while still glaring at the Salarian.
"Yes, I know. The Genophage. We will find a way to cure it or at least reduce its effects...now let's hear what he wants."
"Thank you. I know you two escaped Salarians' Labs. This is good for my own researches, I want to study you personally."
"Change of plans, he is all yours." the blond human said stepping aside making his Krogan friend happily crack his knuckles in anticipation.
"Wait. Not a threat, independent studies outside of Salarian sight. I will keep the results hidden to myself." the alien said unconvincingly.
"He is lying, Salarians are the best Hackers and Spies in the Galaxy, if they want they will find-out what he knows." Garkan answered with narrowed eyes.
"I promise to make an honest try at keeping everything hidden. But I can offer my knowledge and abilities in exchange, high-level technology and information gathering in exchange of you protecting me and the ability to run Tests on you personally." the Salarian added stepping slowly back.
"Why do you need protection? So much to even be ready to join two fugitives, probably labeled as dangerous criminals ones at that? Only for some Test you want to do on me and him?" Naruto asked.
"I am not welcome in Council's space. This is why our meeting should be short. My help and joining for your help in furthering my researches." the alien answered taking-in a longer breath than normal.
"Aaah! You are one of those Lystheni! An Off-shot! Bwahahaha! Who did you piss-off?" Garkan said amused.
"My researches have been deemed too dangerous, what researches? That is confidential." the Salarian answered with a grimace.
"If I really have to take you with me, can I at least know your name?" Naruto asked.
"Not the full name, we have not the whole day for you to list it all!" the Krogan of the three added.
"Yep! The short version, yes." the blond human added nodding.
"It's my clan tradition to give a full name as it includes the name of the Salarian's home world, nation, city, district, clan name and given name. His or Her full identity is to be disclosed in the first meeting. Mine is Gorot III Heranon Saleki Diest Dot Odum Luzom; for faster communication purposes you can call me either Odum or use my given name Luzom." the Salarian answered.
"Well, welcome on board then, Luzom! We may need a hacker to leave this place when C-Sec will find out we are here." Naruto said with a wide smile and dragging the grey-skinned alien down to sit with him.
"Understandable, I already hacked the C-Sec's registry and installed a temporary back-door in their security system firewall." Luzom answered.
"Eh?" Garkan asked confused.
"When the time comes I will be able to shut-down the security cameras for an approximate time of seventy-two seconds and delay their communication of additional thirty-seven seconds, by then we'll have to be near a ship to depart or they will be on us." the Salarian answered.
"Not much, but we have escaped with less," Naruto answered shrugging.
"That because that biotic ball of yours drilled a hole in every wall we found so to move in a straight line towards the hangar." the Krogan said.
"My Rasengan is not a biotic attack! How many times I will have to tell you!?" the blond human answered annoyed.
"Interesting! Non-biotic attack drilling a hole in a reinforced wall? Needs studying, can I study it? What frequency does it use? What's the energy behind it if not Eezo?" Luzom asked interested.
"I think that will have to wait," Quentius said as he walked in front of the table accompanied by C-Sec guards.
"...What about you back-door?" Naruto asked with a dead-pan tone.
"Found and closed, they stopped me from being alerted of it." Luzom answered after a short checking.
"This is why I hate Salarians." Garkan muttered growling.
"Have no fear, gentlemen, as I am not here to arrest you. I happen to have an offer for you, so please follow me." Quentius said with a calm tone once inspected one of the half-empty glasses to take a sip.
"I guess we have no choices?" Naruto asked sighing.
"There is always the option of being arrested, your IDs are still fakes after all." the Turian answered conversationally.
"...He has us by the quads. I'll take the three on the left." Garkan answered getting up.
"I would prefer to not fight. I am actually without weapons." Luzom added.
"We will follow you..." the blond human answered with narrowed eyes.
"HEY!"
"He is actually doing the smart thing, if I wanted to arrest you I would have done it already, please, come to my ship." Quentius answered walking away and leaving behind the guards.
Some time later – Quentius' ship -
Having left the guards back in the local, the three outlaws were then guided by the armed crew to a small conference room and ordered to sit at the table in the middle of it.
"Glad you decided to hear me out," Quentius said with a pleased tone as he sat at the opposite side of the trio.
"Second option would have been bad, Salarian Network would have known where we were. C-Sec won't?" Luzom answered.
"Very perceptive, but yes. In that area security have been made 'lax' and I made sure the guards accompanying me won't talk about our little meeting so that nobody will know we met...Especially since I am asking you to be my hands in more dirty affairs than the ones I am supposed to dwell in." the Turian replied.
"Uh-hu?"
"It has been a week since the battle of the Citadel happened and Councilor Sparatus died in the destruction of the Destiny Ascension, now I am close at taking his place so I will be under constant scrutiny from my fellow Councilors, the press and the Galaxy as a whole...Meaning my freedom will be reduced considerably." he explained.
"And here we are to fix that." Garkan said grumbling.
"Yes, while I may appreciate the fact that the Asari left their 'share' of responsibilities about security on the Citadel to us, I would have preferred having that without the death of my predecessor, and so I decided I needed 'agents' to work for me from the shadows. If anybody ask I will deny my involvement with you should you be captured mid-mission, but in exchange I offer you the best equipment and resources money can buy, along 'immunity' from certain laws should your mission require unconventional solutions." Quentius answered.
"You seem to have all to gain while we take all the risks." Naruto said with narrowed eyes.
"Not exactly, you will be officially registered as my agents, everything will be perfectly legal with every paper signed in triple and every law and regulations followed in full, you would literally be "Regular Soldiers" of the Turian Army...The only difference of course will be that not EVERY Mission you take will be registered, confirmed or even presented to the Council, the Citadel or just the public; I will even make sure to add your pay a small extra whenever one of those missions are completed in success. Being so much in the open will make it less likely for people to think you are working behind the scene. My cutting-off any involvement will of course apply should you fail in those 'Off the records' Missions only of course." the Turian replied nonplussed.
"Just wondering should we accept. What kind of Secret Missions would we take?" Luzom asked.
"To be honest I had already planned to contact you to enlist you in the crew, Doctor Luzom. finding that you already contacted those two made things easier. But, to answer your question, they will mostly be 'Recovery', 'Hacking', 'Hijacking' and 'Demolition' Missions. I would love to see the various species collaborate for a common end, but I also understand that certain elements will need to be removed for this to happen."
"So assassination too?" Naruto asked.
"Only if there will be no better option, as I said, I want people to collaborate, if a terrorist group keeps pushing for war between two races, then I will live with the remorse of having every single member of that group being killed if that stops said war from happening."
"Anything else?"
"I would also like you to keep an eye on Commander Sheppard and brief me on what she does or discover about the Reapers, I too am privately worried about their probable return, even if I still hold a tiny bit of skepticism, it never hurts to be prepared."
"Sheppard? Wasn't she declared KIA?" Garkan asked confused.
"Apparently death as well could not stop her, they have found some traces of a destroyed Reaper and she is sure more will come. She may not have solid proofs, but I too heard the stories about them and I wish them to remain just that, 'Stories' not 'Warnings'...But if for some reason she is right and the Reapers will come..."
"You want to have a head-start." Naruto finished saying nodding.
"Precisely. The Council is a wonderful machine that regulates the Citadel and the races that are part of it, but it moves just too slowly with each member following his or her own ideals and agenda, so IF we really face a single enemy, may it be Reapers, Collectors or whatever monstrosity coming out from the Void...I want things to move smoothly AND fast, not waiting for the Batarian, the Asari and the Humans to decide how, when and who will fight and then pick up the pieces and mourn the deaths we could have saved had we acted sooner." Quentius answered.
"We can provide proofs. We can provide distraction. We can provide the spark that ignites faster response." Luzom said humming.
"And if there is the need, try and slow-down the advancing of the Reapers or everything else IF they appear." Naruto added.
"Yes. So? What is your answer?"
"Your thoughts?" Naruto asked the other two.
"It's either this or prison, it's not like we really have a choice." Garkan answered.
"Covert Ops aren't unheard of, we'll still operate on the right side of law. Turian would still cover our past: my researches will not be disclosed, your crimes won't either." Luzom added.
"I already talked with the next Salarian Councilor, Esheel expressed her will to recall your status as Lystenhi should you drop and erase your studies and accept this mission, your companions too will be left alone just as well." the future Turian Councilor answered.
"Just like that?" Naruto asked doubtful.
"He has hit a dead-end in his experiments early enough to not be considered 'Too dangerous' if left alone."
"Still cannot find right reagent to speed-up effect of serum..." the Salarian muttered in annoyance.
"And you better hope to NEVER find it, if you want to no longer be considered an enemy of your race." Quentius said shaking his head.
"Our hands are tied, you may as well have ignored the issue of asking us and just have somebody tell us we have been conscripted." Naruto said groaning.
"I preferred giving you the illusion of having a choice. So I take you three accepted?" the Batarian asked amused.
"...Yes." the three said in chorus after a short silence.
"Good! For now you will remain here, tomorrow I will introduce you to the rest of the crew of the ship you will work in and the Commander of the squad you will work under.
"Who is he?" Garkan asked.
"She. She is Solana Vakarian, a young Turian soldier I discovered may need the extra money paid from this job. Once contacted her, she readily accepted."
"She needs money?" Naruto asked.
"It is not my place to tell, but Salarian cures are awfully expensive, and even if her dear brother likes to make 'secret' donations, those are hardly enough." Quentius answered.
"...Can you do something to speed things up?" the blond asked.
"Hard to say, I may need to hack the hospital mainframe and discover what she has or if the family member in the hospital needs special treatments, but is feasible." Luzom answered.
"And?" the shinobi prompted.
"Give me proper equipment and I'll see if I can help recovery."
"Perfect. I will cover the expenses with part of my pay." the blond answered with a pleased nod.
"..."
"...What?" he then asked at seeing how Quentius was looking at him.
"I was wondering why you just did this." the Turian said honestly curious.
"She is accepting a job that will probably destroy her career should she be discovered, all to help somebody she cares about being healed. I am a sucker for whoever takes risks to protect and save their Precious People. Whoever they are-"
"Her mother." Luzom said while reading the display of his Omnitool.
"...You already hacked the file?" Garkan asked mighty impressed.
"It was behind a Level Six firewall with three different thirty-six characters alpha-numerical passwords in three different alphabet. My apologies if I took so long. I am more of a doctor/geneticist than a Hacker." the other answered sounding almost ashamed.
"Level Six?" Naruto asked curious.
"Highest Level is Level Seven. Citadel is only mainframe using Level Eight security, still impossible to duplicate it."
"As long you have not been discovered again." Garkan said huffing.
"To be fair we were monitoring him the whole time so we saw him prepare that back-door, otherwise we would have never noticed it. Wonderful job by the way, we made sure you will be credited as ' a worried citizen of the Citadel that casually found a hole in our defences and alerted the proper authorities to have it patched'." Quentius said.
"Thank you." Luzom answered drily.
"Cool. If we are okay, Luzom, please remember me to deposit my extra in paycheck in a fund for your researches healing Solana's mother."
"I will remember it."
"I can take care of it myself if you are so adamant in doing it and have your extra pay go directly to Doctor Luzom, as long as he uses the extra money for his researches on Miss Vakarian's mother of course." Quentius said calmly.
"Yes I will." the Batarian answered nodding.
"Thank you." Naruto said with a thumbs-up.
"I take it then that you three accept my offer? Very well, you will be now accompanied in your temporary rooms here. Tomorrow you will be transferred on the Imperium Frigate under Miss Solana's orders, do not make me regret this choice." Quentius said pleased before walking away.
"Welcome to the Turian Army." one of the soldiers said.
"Hurray!" Naruto said unconvincingly making the Turian chuckle.
"We are not so bad." he answered amused.
The next day – Turian Frigate 'Imperium' -
"Here they are, Commander Vakarian." a grey-skinned Turian said introducing the three 'Former criminals/escapees' to a female Turian with pale-brown-ish skin that was more on the 'petite' side with more soft curves compared to the male soldier accompanying her.
"Relax, gentlemen, and welcome on the Imperium." Solana said as soon as the three got up from their seats when she entered.
"Leave us," she then ordered making the other soldiers vacate the room to remain alone with the three.
Taking a deep breath she calmed herself and looked at them straight in the eyes.
"What were you promised to do this? What would be your duties during Missions?" she asked immediately.
"I am Naruto Namikaze. They promised me the Batarian will stop trying to vivisect me to see how my body works. I can cover for jobs requiring Reconnaissance, Espionage, Infiltration, Stealth Killing, Impersonation (of every Race), etc-etc-etc...I am a Ninja. Literally." the blond human said.
"A...What?" Solana asked confused.
"I will send Human Codex about works of fiction and Culture." Luzom said nonplussed.
"What do you mean 'Impersonation'? How can you impersonate somebody that is not Human?" she then asked.
"Simple! I do this: Henge!" he answered covering himself in smoke, when that dissipated a Turian no different from any of the guards that had just left was in Naruto's place.
"W-Wha?"
"Or this!" he added turning into a Batarian, then in a Krogan and in a Quarian and even in an Asari, before returning human.
"Either Male or Female of course!" Naruto said smirking.
"Yeah, it was hard not jumping him when he turned into a female Krogan for a bet." Garkan admitted.
"That is why I won't do that ever again."
"HOW?!"
"No codex entry of that ability. Why? Mutation? Military secret? New Biotics?" Luzom asked even faster than usual in great interest.
"Nope! Humans used to be able to do this, then some self-centered alien bastard found us to be too dangerous and used some science bullshit to 'Remove' Chakra from us...I am the only Exemplar of 'Humanity 1.0' remained nowadays because they never found the beacon they used to put me in stasis and hidden on our moon. I can do lots of fun things if you need, so I will make myself very useful, have no fear." Naruto explained sighing.
"Oh..." Solana said in surprise.
"And you two?" she then asked.
"I just want Batarians to stop using me for making Genophage 'Better'. I shot things until they are dead and can drink everybody else under the table. The rest is my own business." Garkan answered uninterested.
"I was promised the dropping of my Lystheni Status. I am a physician, medic, geneticist and biologist with a specialization in Bio-Engineering and Nano-technology. Information/data gathering and Hacking are also in my field of expertise, along cybernetic prosthetic." Luzom answered showing both his artificial arms.
"A big wound that one," Solana admitted in respect.
"No wound. Self amputation, I needed to properly test for sensibility and eventual time-lapses between thought and action so I used myself for testing." the Batarian answered.
"That's hardcore." Naruto admitted with a low whistle.
"Yep!" Garkan added with a nod.
"Also, fake hands are stronger and do not resent of allergic reactions, poisoning, radiations exposure and can be more precise when dealing with very delicate work and have more stabilized aim when shooting." the scientist added.
"Very well, we four are on the same boat then, I too have my reasons to be here for this 'Special' Team, and not all of them are about Turian Honor." Solana answered sighing.
"Yeah, yeah. That politician promised you extra money for your mother, we know." Garkan said uncaring.
"The same tact of a Tresher Maw." Naruto grumbled annoyed.
"Quite fitting analogy." Luzom said nodding.
"Oh...Then...I am Solana Vakarian, I am trained in Sniping, scouting, reconnaissance, warfare, guerrilla tactics, sabotage, high-profile assassination and similar missions. And as your friend said...I need money for health bills." the Turian deflated a little at that.
"Nice to meet you, Commander." Naruto said with a small bow.
"Likewise." Luzom said.
"Tch!"
"You are free to go, try to acquaintance with the ship and the crew, tomorrow we will depart for our first mission." Solana said returning to sound sure of herself.
"Yes, Commander." human and Batarian said as one.
"Aye. By the way, the Blonde Bastard here is helping paying those bills of yours for some reason, so nobody of us will laugh. But where is the food here? And the alcohol?!" Garkan said as he left the room with a grumbling stomach.
"I'll see where the medical bay is, can I make some specific requests should I find some equipment being lacking?" Luzom asked.
"Yes, I will then ask to Councilor Quentius if our budget can cover that." she answered.
"Thank you, Commander." the Batarian said as he too left the room.
"Then I will roam around and poke random things, it should help making my "Turian Henge" a bit more believable if I can study you others close." Naruto said smiling as he tried to leave while whistling before Solana's hand grabbed his arm stopping him.
"WAIT!" she said.
"Yes?"
"You are the one that decided to help me cure my mother...Why? What do you get in exchange from that?"
"Nothing." he replied shrugging.
"Then why?"
"I grew-up without parents, and I always fought to protect my Precious People...You are doing this and risk ruining your military career (that for a Turian means a fucking lot) just to scrap enough money for those damn expensive Batarian doctors and save your mother, I am just using the extra money from our 'Out-law, suicide Missions' for something worth the effort. I hate the idea of seeing somebody losing a family member, that's all." he explained with a gentle smile.
"I..Don't know what to say."
"Huhuhu! Thank you would be more than enough, and if we are lucky, our new friend Luzom might stumble on some alternative solution himself for your mom's illness."
"Luck?" Solana said confused.
"I have lots of it normally, maybe it will help in this as well." the blond answered shrugging.
"Let's hope so." Solana answered nodding unsure.
"Commander? We have got an emergency call about a raid from Cerberus. Councilor Quentius told us to intervene 'Standard Procedure', Shall I prepare for launch?" the pilot of the ship asked from the intercom.
"Go! We have no time to waste!" Solana answered.
"Yes, Commander!"
"Standard Procedure, does it means that this is a 'Normal' Mission instead of his out-of-the-records ones?" Naruto asked.
"So it seems. Follow me." she answered.
"Yes."
And so, the Special Task Force of the Imperium moved its first steps in the Galaxy, ready to face everything Fate will put in front of them.
Omake – Garrus Vakarian: Overprotective Turian Brother – (Takes place during the events of ME3)
Citadel – Solana's apartment -
It was very early in the morning when Solana Vakarian was forced awake by an incoming call of her brother, the first video-call in a long time actually.
"Good Morning, Broth-"
"What is this thing about you allegedly having a boyfriend?" Garrus asked immediately and with a furious tone as soon as his face appeared on the screen.
"And how do you know that? Let's hear!" Solana answered annoyed while crossing her arms.
"I have my informants. Now answer me! Who is he? Where does he work? Why he asked YOU out? Where do I have to put a bullet to kill him?" her brother asked in rapid succession.
"In order: I am not telling you. None of your business. None of your business. And if you even TRY to shot him I will shot YOU." Solana answered.
"I have better accuracy."
"And I have better drawing speed." she replied.
"Damn it, I just want to know who he is! And why you sleep naked!?" Garrus almost shrieked in answer.
"I don't remember you telling me you were going out with Commander Sheppard." Solana countered with narrowed eyes.
"And how do you know that!?" her brother hissed.
"I too have my informants." she said with a vindicated tone.
"TELL ME WHO HE IS!"
"NEVER!"
"Solana, you okay?" Naruto asked as his head peaked-out from the bathroom.
"...WHO THE -AUTOMATIC PROFANITY CENSURE- IS HE?!" Garrus asked screaming, this time actually reaching a very high-pitched tone of voice.
"Who is the angry guy?" the blond human asked confused.
"Well...No sense in hiding it anymore...Naruto, this is Garrus, my brother. Garrus? This is Naruto...My boyfriend." Solana said uneasy.
"Gck!" Garrus answered with a clearly unhealthy-sounding rasping noise.
"H-Hello! Sorry if I don't come out...I kinda lack the clothes for that...This is awkward." the blond said with a forced smile.
"YOU NAKED! SHE NAKED!" Garrus roared seemingly reverting to more primitive vocabulary for reason of blind anger.
"...Stuff happened?" Naruto tried saying unsure.
"GCK! GgggggkkkkkkkKKKYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! -Signal Lost -" Garrus' bestial scream of utter rage went cur short as static overcame the communication signaling the destruction of the communicator on his side.
"..."
"...Not my best choice of words." Naruto admitted.
"No. No it wasn't." Solana admitted.
"From where was he calling?" he asked.
"...From the Citadel...Dock area...He was calling from the Normandy." a VERY pale Solana replied worried.
"SHIT!" the shinobi answered hurrying inside the room to get dressed.
"What are you-"
"LUZOM! LUZOM ANSWER ME!" the blond screamed in his Omnitool.
"Yes?" the Batarian answered.
"Find me a ship directed to the most isolated, inhospitable planet you can find in the most hidden and obscure corner of the galaxy! Or at least one that passes close to such a place, I will force them to drop me there once on board!" he explained.
"I can do that, but why?" Luzom asked while already looking for said ship.
"The short version? I had sex with our Commander as per my 'Boyfriend's Duties' to keep her satisfied, now her brother clearly wants me VERY DEAD!" Naruto said finally getting dressed.
"What about allergic reactions? Different chemistry can mean allergic response to ingestion of certain body fluids during coitus." the Batarian asked curious.
"Only ingestion, she didn't ingest a thing as I did everything on her face. Neither did I ingest anything."
"CAN YOU PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT IT!?" Solana asked mighty embarrassed.
"OPEN THIS DOOR, SOLANA!" Garrus voice resounded from outside as he tried to force the door open.
"SHIT, HE IS HERE ALREADY?! THE SHIP LUZOM! THE SHIP!" Naruto said jumping outside the window just in time to evade the first salvo of bullets Garrus shoot as soon as he entered and saw him.
"Found one, Asari ship for archaeological researches, it should pass near an abandoned mining planet in its third week of travel. Frozen planet, highest temperature ever registered was of 'Minus 178 Degrees Celsius' using human scales." the Batarian answered.
"It's a good start-eeep!" the blond said while running vertically on the wall as a bullet passed very close to his head.
"STOP!" he heard Solana scream as she tackled her brother to the floor before he could shot again.
"Name is 'Passion of Discovery'. Dock seven, I already registered you as guest, just have a good excuse when they will ask for clarification." Luzom said.
"GOOD! THANK YOU!" Naruto answered grateful and closing the communication before gaining even more speed in his escape as bullets had once again started raining on him.
A month later – Frozen planet – abandoned mining outpost -
"SHOW YOURSELF!" Garrus horrifying roar of rage managed to cut through the howling winds perpetually blowing on the planet waking-up the sleeping Naruto.
"Shit! Shit! SHIT! He has found me? HOW!?" the blond said shocked.
"Naruto? Can you hear me?" Luzom asked from blond's omnitool.
"Luzom? What's wrong?"
"The Geth crew-member of Sheppard Ship violated my system and found your location, the Normandy was last seen moving towards your position. The antagonistic weather stopped me from alerting you sooner." the Batarian said with an apologetic tone.
"Too late it is! He is here already!"
"I suggest strategic retreat then, the Imperium is reaching the planet's orbit to collect you, do you need assistance?"
"COME OUT AND FACE MEEEEE!"
"I would appreciate that, yes."
"Garrus!" Solana's voice echoed everywhere as the Imperium breached the orbit to hover above the area.
"WHAT?!" the Turian growled back in answer.
"Maybe you should calm down a little, Garrus." Sheppard said from her position next to him as she tried AGAIN to make him see reason.
"I AM CALM!" he bellowed.
"YOU CAN'T KILL HIM!" Solana said furious.
"WHY?!"
"...Because I love him..." she admitted shyly.
"YES!" the blond cheered finally coming out from his hiding spot.
"NOOOOOOO!" Garrus yelled letting loose a wild spray of bullets that forced the shinobi to dive for cover.
"STOP! I DON'T WANT TO BE A WIDOW MOTHER-AH!" Solana said before noticing and covering her mouth with both hands.
"WHAT?!" Both Naruto and Garrus yelled in chorus.
"...It was supposed to be a surprise..." she admitted ashamed.
"Very surprising to see cross-breeding resulting in success. I ask permission to study a seminal sample of our Human teammate, Commander." Luzom was heard say in the background.
"Me too." another Batarian asked from Sheppard Omnitool.
"Not now, Mordin." the woman hissed in answer with a low voice.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Garrus bellowed as the last spark of humanity (or is it Turian-ity?) left his eyes to leave room to pure hatred as he tried to physically assault Naruto.
"STOP HELPING ME, SOLANA!" The blond in the meantime yelled as he ran away from the crazed Turian.
"GARRUS! STOP!" Sheppard said as she chased the two.
"STOP IT, BROTHER!" Solana also yelled as the ship kept following the two no matter the absurd wind.
Maybe he should have remained sealed inside the Moon, way less of a hassle!
End of the Omake.
This too it saddened me to leave unfinished, but I honestly had no idea about how to tackle it! And just to be sure to not make an enemy of the Mass Effect Fandom, I preferred to not continue it, even if I find a waste leaving a good idea like this unfinished.