Author's Note- I do not own any of the characters unless I have stated so. I used Love, Simon (the beginning preface) as a base for this story. I hope you like it!
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.
It was a cliche way to start the day, but it's the only kind of alarm that would wake the sleeping boy. Jack rolled over and grabbed his phone, mumbling something about how the school system was stupid for making him get up this early. He slid the snooze, his eyes hazy. He shoved his face back into his pillow for a silent moment, sighing, before rolling out of bed drowsily.
He lazily got ready for the day, washing his pure white hair and looking in the mirror. He clapped his cheeks a few times to wake himself up, as much as he disdained it. It was half-past 7, and school started at 8, so he didn't have much time to eat. Instead, he waited outside for his ride.
For the longest time, Jack rode the big yellow school bus that came bumbling down Mainstreet each morning at 7:15. He was grateful that he didn't have to anymore. Merida rolled around the corner, with her big, fiery hair practically blinding against the overcast morning. Jack smiled halfheartedly. He had only known her for a short while, since she'd moved in a few months ago practically across the universe- or just from Scotland, but same difference in Virginia- but it seemed like their blatant sarcasm only brought them closer.
"Oi, Jackson, yer gonna be late fer school if ya don't pick up yer feet!" She rolled down the window and laughed. "Hurry up, today's Wednesday, I want my coffee!" Jack chuckled and hopped into the passenger's seat. Merida sped out of the driveway and onto the road.
"So, how are you?"
Jack set his bag down at his feet. "I'm okay, I guess."
Merida glanced at him with her eyebrow raised. "Yah, and my dad's a ballet dancer. What's up with you?"
Jack sighed slightly. "It's nothing. I tried to focus and study for the test last night, but you know how bad I am at hard work and deadlines."
"Hah, that's true. Maybe when yeh get home you can sleep."
Jack cocked his head at Merida. "You know I can't do that. Gothel would kill me. Call me a lazy-ass and whatnot."
"Eh. Who cares about yer grades, anyway?" She stared ahead for a moment at the road, her smile disappearing and her expression turning to sympathy. "You are more important. You gotta take care of yerself, Jack. I mean it."
Jack looked down for a moment. "It's alright. I'm okay."
The car was silent. The kind of silence where neither party knew what to say, for fear of screwing up or making things even more awkward.
Merida turned into the second driveway, the tires screeching as she slammed the break. Jack laughed once the car had stopped. "You need to lay off the speed, one day you're gonna get yourself killed," he said, and although he said it in a joking manner, he really did mean it deep down.
"Humbug," Merida retorted. "Ah, there she is." A girl came running out of the front door of the house. Merida smirked, and just before the girl opened the door to the car, she snapped the lock on.
"Oh, come on!" The girl said through the window. "Merida, that is so old."
"Yet yah still fell for it!" She stuck out her tongue jokingly, before opening the door. "You're so gullible, yer like my mum!"
"Ah, piss off, Merida."
"Anything for you, your highness."
"Hey, Jack, can you hit her for me?"
Jack laughed. "Come on, Punzie, you're not the violent type."
"Nah, I was kidding." She pulled her long blonde hair up into a ponytail, as Merida pulled out of the driveway.
"Last stop," Merida said, finally parking in another driveway, two streets down. "Then coffee."
The white-haired girl was already waiting, with a braid and a halter top dress. She hopped in on the other side. "Why are you all so late?"
"What do you mean, late? It's 7:45." Jack raised his brow, smiling jokingly.
"You're usually here at 7:40."
"Ah, Elsa, stop bein' so uptight, I swear ya got a rod up yer ass."
The whole car laughed as they drove to their favorite coffee shop, 'Sundrop Coffee'. Merida ordered for them. "I'll have two iced vanilla lattes, one hot chocolate, and a caramel macchiato."
The coffee was fast and came in a cardboard cupholder.
"So, how are all of you on this slightly boring morning?"
"Slightly? I'd say it's severely boring. Could have at least had rain. That would have been better than this." Merida snorted at Punzie's comment.
"So I'll take that as you're tired," Elsa teased. "You're usually all sunshine and rainbows."
"Honestly, yeah. Midterms are next week and I don't know how I'm gonna do. I've got two B's and 3 A minuses."
"Pfff, that's nothing," Merida laughed, "I've got 4 C's, a D, an F, and two B's."
"Uh, Merida?" Elsa giggled. "That's not a good thing."
"Ah know, ah know, but I'll figure it out. The archery team can't exactly kick me off." Merida wiggled her eyebrows. "You all know I'm the best."
"More like the cockiest."
Everyone laughed, but Jack sat in the passenger seat, staring out the window at the passing cars and houses. His iced coffee sat in the cupholder, still full. He wondered if he'd be able to pass the test today.
"Jack?"
Jack blinked, looking back at the rest of the people. Elsa was the one who'd spoken. The car was dead silent, but for the radio that played quietly in the background. "You okay?"
It was quiet for a moment.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me. I'm just tired."
"You sure? Jack, you look dreadful."
"Thanks, Punzie."
"You know what I mean."
"No, I'm fine. Really. Just stressed and tired, that's all."
The car was quiet for the rest of the way to the school.
"Well, I hope you dorks have a good day at school. Don't die." Merida winked.
"Merida, that was the cringiest face I've ever seen."
"Oh, sod off!"
Jack walked the halls like he always did when he wasn't with his friends: invisibly. Nobody talked to or acknowledged him. He felt like a ghost sometimes. Like his friends were the only ones who ever saw him. Jack felt more like a watcher than anything. He'd watch people and everything around him. He cracked jokes in class a lot, but he doubted half the class knew his name.
He sat in third period, hardly listening to the teacher drone on. He tried to listen, and every few minutes he'd sit up and try to take notes, but it felt like everything was moving too fast, and he'd give up quickly and go back to scribbling little patterns in the corners of his lined paper.
Most teachers didn't care much for him. This one especially. Mr. Stutzman held the firm belief that if you wanted something to change, you had to do it yourself. He prefaced the beginning of the course by saying 'I won't baby you, you're young adults and can do your own work and pay attention. If you fail, it will be because you have not reached out for help or have simply failed to do the work required of you.'
Jack thought it made sense. He certainly liked it better than the teachers who were always on his back. He couldn't focus at all during the school day, but when he got home he could generally figure things out by reading it himself and doing the homework. Even still, he had three C's and two D's, and two A's. This class was a C.
Jack scoffed to himself. "C's get degrees," He mumbled under his breath. Nobody heard him. He could make himself heard when he wanted to, but most of the time nobody really listened. Stutzman droned on about relativity, while he sat staring at the board without any of it sinking in.
The bell rang loudly, but Jack didn't move, knowing that Stutzman hadn't assigned the night's homework.
"The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do!" He boomed, forcing the others back to their seats with a groan. "Tonight's homework is to read page 394 in your textbooks and do the paired assignment on relativity. Have a good day."
Everyone sprung out of their seats and filed out of the door. Jack slowly picked up his bag and sketchbooks. He was almost out of the door when he heard a voice behind him.
"Overland. Come here."
He furrowed his brow. He hadn't done anything wrong, had he? He turned around to face his teacher. His heart beat in his ears.
"Sit."
He did as he was instructed, but cautiously, as if to not make any sudden movements and scare away the birds.
"I don't usually do this kind of thing, Jack. But you've got a C in my class, and I know you can do better than that. The only thing weighing your grade is your personal management. You can't seem to focus, and when you are, you crack jokes instead of letting the material sink in." He leaned forward on his messy desk, propping himself up on his elbows. "But you've been overly distracted lately. You haven't said anything. You seem distant." He paused, sighing a bit. "Listen, Jack, I know you're in a rough situation. But you need to try harder. I've checked the rest of your grades, and I know you can do better than this. There's a tutoring club after school on Wednesdays, and I wanted to recommend you come in next week- or today, if you can. It isn't mandatory, but I'd like to see you improve."
Jack stared at him blankly. He wasn't sure how to respond.
"I feel like you can do more than you're letting on, that's all. As much of a face I put on in class, I do care about my students. Here's a note to your next class. If you hustle you won't be late."
Jack lifted his hand slowly and took the note. "Thanks," he said, almost in a questioning tone. He walked away, into the bustling halls. Was it really that obvious? That something was different now?
He shook his head and tried to let the thought out. He didn't want to think about it.
He made it to his locker, where his randomized locker buddy, Sandy, was standing. He only knew his name because it was written on half of his things. His binder, his books, everything was labeled. Sandy didn't talk- Jack wasn't sure if he could. He had spiky golden hair and hazel eyes and was almost a foot shorter than Jack. He always said hello to him, and Sandy always smiled and waved back.
"Hi Sandy," Jack said, and the boy turned around and faced him, smiling, waving and walking away as usual. Then, he tapped his wristwatch, nodding at Jack, then left. Jack watched him walk away for a second, before grabbing his next textbook.
The four sat quietly eating in the otherwise noisy cafeteria. "So, how's everyone's day?" Punzie asked. She received only a groan in response. "That bad, huh," she mumbled to herself.
"There was a fight in the girls' bathroom."
"What? Really?"
"Yeah, it didn't get physical though. Almost. Not quite." Merida took a big bite out of her apple, her hair bouncing in her way.
"Say, Jack, how do yah feel about only having girl friends?"
Jack looked up. He had been completely checked out until Merida asked. "I… I don't know, I think it's fine. Why wouldn't it be?"
"I dunno, some sort of sexist bullshit."
"Hey, mind if I sit with you guys?"
A tall boy with shaggy brown hair and eyes was the source of the voice, standing behind Jack. He had a chiseled jawline and some stubble. "Oh, sure!" Punzie said, before anyone else could object. She patted the seat next to her.
"Sorry, I'm new here," the boy said as he sat down. "The name's Flynn."
"Nice to meet you," Punzie smiled and held out her hand, "My name's Rapunzel, but most people just call me Punzie."
The rest of the group stared at Punzie, cringing internally and hoping the boy wouldn't be a bother. "This is Merida, Elsa, and Jack."
"So, are you two like a couple or something?" Flynn asked, looking at Elsa and Jack.
"What?! No, uhm," they both said in unison.
"Oh, sorry, I just though because of the hair."
"Well, hers is natural. Mine's bleached. It's a funny story actually." Jack laughed quietly to himself thinking about how when they had been 12, Elsa had been made fun of for her bright blonde hair, and how Jack had countered by dying his hair white. Since then, he'd grown to like the look, and decided to keep it.
"Ha ha, yeah, totally." Elsa kicked Jack under the table before he started saying anything, and Jack resisted the urge to yelp. "So, Flynn, where are you from?"
"Well, I'm from across town. I got kicked out of my other school."
Elsa and Jack looked at each other, both wondering how they'd gotten into the mess of befriending someone who got expelled.
"Oh, that's awful! Why?" Punzie maintained her bubbly attitude.
"I got in a big mess with these two thieves. They framed me."
"That's awful."
"Do you believe that?" Jack mumbled to Elsa.
"Of course not," Elsa said back.
But soon, Flynn and Punzie were talking away, leaving the three to a different conversation.
"Well, I guess that works out," Merida said, putting her hair up in a ponytail.
"I guess so. Let's just hope he was telling the truth." Elsa fiddled with her braid, before Merida's hair tie snapped.
"Damn!"
"Language," Elsa said.
"Did you just say 'language', Agnarr?"
Jack snorted.
"Jack, go on the school website, there's this huge scoop in the confessional. Everyone's talking about it."
Jack was puzzled. Elsa had called her about the school newspaper? Then again, this is Elsa. To her, anything is big. "What is it?"
"Just do it, Jack. Trust me, it's crazy."
Jack groaned lightly. "You're really gonna make me look it up?"
"It's better if you read it yourself."
He grumbled a little, hopping on his crappy laptop- he got it on craigslist with some of the money he got from his summer job- and going to the website. The newspaper crew had decided a few years back that it would be more paper-efficient to move their writing online. Since then, there'd been a few wild things in the confessional letters.
Jack mumbled to himself, clicking on the confessional section, and waiting for it to load. "Elsa, if this isn't good, I'll push you into the lake," He said into his phone.
"Aw, c'mon, Jack. You wouldn't."
"I've done it before, remember?"
"Yeah, but you know how much I hated it."
"Oh, here it is. It finally loaded."
Jack started to read. He furrowed his brow.
"Crazy, isn't it?"
"Elsa, I'll call you back. Uhm, Gothel's calling."
"I don't hear anythi-" Jack hung up before she could finish, his heart beating so fast in his chest that he wasn't sure how he wasn't having a heart attack.
Dear Burgess High,
I'm just like the rest of you. I go to school, maybe do some of my work, drink too much coffee. Except, every day I feel like nobody would ever like me if they knew about me. I feel like I'll be hated. Like I'm on some sort of hellish ride of fear where everything's okay as I climb to the top until I get to the huge 90 degree drop and hit rock bottom. So, I guess this is me saying it out loud. Nobody, not my parents, not my friends, not my teachers, nobody knows that I'm gay.
-Red
Jack stared in disbelief. He read the final line over and over again. Usually, the confessional had girls crying about their boyfriends, or drama, or straight up feelings. But never this. Burgess had so much homophobic background, the majority of students were brought up in christian beliefs, and because of that it was unspeakable to, well, be gay.
He reread and felt his ears grow hot as he clicked on the email link in the corner of the confessional.
He stared at his screen, where an open message sat blinking.
He typed, then shook his head. "God, this is stupid." He typed again, nodding silently until his message was done. Then he deleted it again, and restarted. His nerves were bunched and he didn't know how to say it right.
He stood, running his fingers through his hair and back over his face. He bit his lip, then tapped send.
Dear Red,
I'm just like you. I've been holding everything in for the last few years, and it's the biggest secret I have. Not even my friends know that I'm gay too.
-Frost