Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha
Tears Hidden in the Rain
Nekomata-17
I stare as the rain sputters against the ground… I can't see the moon anymore… the clouds are too dark… I feel my heart thudding dully as I gaze at the shrine grounds… I barely notice that my body is becoming cold… I barely notice the rain now; I still hear its pattering. The weather becoming worse… but nothing registers in my mind… my mind is too full of memories, memories that are tearing me to pieces… I try desperately not to cry, so I do the first thing that comes to mind… I hum… even then… I can't get the events from earlier from my mind…
Flashback
It was soon after the battle with Kaguya. I stood at the foot of the Goshimboku, remembering when I had kissed Inuyasha. I had not known it would break the spell… I just wanted him back… to show that I cared about him… I wondered if he would still go back to Kikyo… I was cut out of my thoughts when I felt warm arms encircle my waist from behind, already knowing who it was. I shivered at the warm breath next to my ear, as the Hanyou whispered the three words I have waited my life to hear…
"I love you…"
Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
After words being turned and pulled into a loving and gentle kiss… I let him into my heart… I let him know who I was… he was the one who made me feel strong, protected… who made me feel like I was something…
I would forever remember this moment…
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on
End Flashback
My half lidded eyes stared ahead at nothing in particular, as I let the faintest of smile grace my lips and the smallest of light shimmered in my eyes… I was still humming… but as I thought of the other memories muddled in my mind… my eyes turned back to their blank stare, and my smile turned down, no longer was I smiling… no matter how much I wanted to hold in those tears… I couldn't… there was no point anymore… my rears fell… but no one would notice… not only would it mix with the rain… but no one was around to care…
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
I wanted to forget and with out realizing… I had a dance to the hum that I had… my arms swayed from side to side. My feet walked me in circles, gliding along the cement. I closed my eyes, bringing my head from side to side, and soon, slowly I was twirling… dancing in the rain…
I felt my heart tear again as my mind continued to work…
I remembered… what he said… what he did… and it hurt…
As I continued to remember, my humming was now not just a hum… it now represented a song… a song that spoke volumes…
I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside
'Cause I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on
Flashback
I awoke from slumber, looking around the hut I was in… I realized it seemed colder… like I had lost a warmth I wasn't supposed to. I looked around me… everyone in their slumber. And then I knew what I lost…
I got up and walked outside the hut… looking for my warmth… and then… I found it… but it was providing warmth for someone else… but what hurt the most… was not that arms encircled one another, but also were lips.
I walked away… knowing that I was not needed anymore… I was in so much of a daze that I just went back to the hut and back to my sleeping bag. Waiting for the sun to come… hoping it was some form of nightmare… but it was no nightmare…
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
I don't remember much of waking up… eating… conversing with my friends or seeing the man who dropped me in this daze… I don't even remember when a rogue demon found us… I wasn't quick enough… and it angered my protector that he always had to look after me… I walked away when he was finished talking… thinking I hadn't heard him… that I hadn't heard him when he called me weak… a copy… a nothing…
Through all the times that I have known him… I never saw him this angry before… I continued walking until I saw a pair of feet before me… It was her… after thinking he made the wrong choice… he changed his mind and chose her… I only allowed her to follow me to the campsite to join the others. I watched as she hugged him… but then I moved my gaze… I was worthless… so what right did I have to look at them, and I would never let them see my tears… I never noticed the golden eyes gaze upon me for fleeting moment…
Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...
I hadn't realized I had fallen asleep until I was woken to a similar face to myself… I never questioned when I followed the figure to the well… never did I resist when she grabbed the shining orb from around my neck… I never let the tears escape my eyes as I watched my former love look at me from a distance, hidden in the bushes… and I never screamed when the woman pushed me back… letting me fall silently through the blue mist.
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
End Flashback
And here I am… the worthless being that I am… dancing to a hum… a song that I can't help but think about… The rain sputtered around me… mixing with my tears… no longer am I waiting for someone…. I thought I was loved… I thought I met the one who would never let me cry… so here I am… the fool… dancing in the rain…
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry…
Behind these hazel eyes…
A/N: Recently I have been feeling under the weather, so I decided to write this… just guy issues that every girl suffers through . So anyways, I hope you like this story, and please review and tell me what you think. Preferably no flames .