Hello!

New story! Hurray! Don't worry readers of my other story (Mother of Halla) that is still in the works as well. Anyway, I've been doing another play through of the Dragon Age series and wanted to do a slightly AU story of Cullen and Surana. I'm not sure how far I'll go with it, but it could potentially go through all three games. It's just for fun, kind of fluffy, maybe a bit actiony, and far fetched in some cases I suppose. Buckle up, because I'm not sure where this one is taking me!

Read, enjoy, and review please!

RussianBear27

Chapter 1

She could hear them talking, all around her the tower was abuzz with the news of her Harrowing. Everyone was talking about her, the quiet elf who kept mostly to herself, and nearly always had her head in a book. Some even mistook her for a tranquil from time to time.

"She breezed through," they whispered. "One of the smoothest Harrowings ever. She has so much potential."

Instead of basking in the congratulations from her fellow apprentices, she stole away to the library to the rarely used chamber she had come to love. It may have once been a storage room, but she had turned it into her personal hide away. Being the Librarian's assistant had its perks.

There she kept a collection of her favorite tomes. A worn chair sat opposite the window looking out over the lake. A quilt was folded neatly across the ottoman. Early one morning, she woke up to find that same quilt covered her. Someone had cared enough to bring it up to her after she had fallen asleep reading. The old rug that covered the stone floor used to belong First Enchanter Irving's, who she convinced to part with after he acquired a new one for his quarters.

Otherwise the small room was sparsely decorated. A few books were stacked on the stone bench beneath the window, since there was no more room on the few shelves she had. It wasn't much, but it was the closest thing she had to having her own space.

Here she could hide away from the prying eyes, and the attention that made her so uncomfortable. The only ones who ever visited her here were Jowen, and a Templar. There were many a night Jowen would join her and they would stay up late playing cards, studying for exams, or just talking. Cullen, the Templar, was different. He had stumbled upon her hide away quite by accident, but had become a familiar visitor.

Cullen would visit her during his off hours. Usually they would read together in silence. Though she had caught him looking at her, when he was supposedly reading, on more than one occasion. She didn't mind though. Sometimes they would talk about family back home, or discuss the books they were currently reading. She knew his favorites were the adventure stories and history, while she read about theories of the fade and ancient elven magic.

Often, she would attempt to dicuss what she was learning, but some of it went over Cullen's head. Nonetheless, he always listened intently. It was a dangerous game they were playing, but neither had the mind to step away. At least not yet.

The familiar space was a welcome sight after the trials of her Harrowing. She looked out over the lake towards the distant shore, lost in thought. She didn't even notice when Cullen entered.

"Kaliana, you d-did very well in your Harrowing," he stammered, startling the mage.

"Cullen!" she gasped, "don't sneak up on me like that."

"I-I'm sorry," he always struggled with his word around her. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's alright," she assured him, "and thank you."

He just looked at her for a moment, unsure of what to say next. Until he remembered the excuse he had procured to track her down, "I, um, have a letter for you. Ah, it's from your mother… I think."

Kaliana smiled, she couldn't stop herself from noticing how cute he was when he was nervous. Turning a shade of red, Cullen handed her the letter.

"I'm very glad you succeeded in your Harrowing," he tried to make conversation while she opened the message. "Well, I knew you would, because you're… um, well you're you. I just, if you hadn't completed your Harrowing they put me in charge of… ending things…" He froze realizing how it sounded, "I'm sorry, this was much better in my head."

"Cullen," Kaliana giggled, "I know what you mean. I'm glad you were there."

He sighed and changed the subject, "What does your letter say?"

Kaliana skimmed the first portion of the letter, "well it seems my sister is to be married soon."

"Will you go to the ceremony?"

"I don't know, mostly likely not," Kaliana was torn. "I haven't been home to Denerim since I joined the circle." Her mother and sister had visited on a couple occasions, but visits were rare and difficult for her family who had no coin to spare. She was lucky she received letters from family often. Many apprentices either had no family, or their families didn't care enough to write. Some families looked upon magic as shameful and preferred to abandon their children to the Circle.

"As a full mage of the Circle you can request time to leave," Cullen noted.

"I don't know, they only give leave for very good reasons."

"You'll never know if you don't try."

Kaliana thought for a moment. The circle occasionally would grant leave to mages to leave, but only for certain events and under very strict conditions. Cullen was right though, there was no harm is trying.

Kaliana was given a week's leave to attend her sister's wedding. She was of course to be escorted by a Templar guard. Luckily Kaliana was considered a "low risk" by the order, since she knew very little combat magic. She had spent most of her time in the circle studying theoretical magic and the fade. This meant that only one guard was needed to escort her. Her guard, of course, was none other than Cullen Rutherford. Though he was one of the most likely choices for this assignment, Kaliana wasn't convinced it was entirely by chance they were to travel together. She couldn't determine if it was Irving or Gregior's influence that determined this arrangement. Regardless, she was thrilled to be able to visit her family.

It was a two-day journey to Denerim, and Cullen said very little to her during their first day of travel. They never spoke much outside of Kaliana's little office and when they did they never used each other's names. She always to the Templar as "Ser," and he addressed her as "Miss," as was the proper way. Yet, his silence now perturbed her. He seemed more nervous than ever, and she addressed it after they made camp for the night.

"Are you angry with me, Cullen?" Kaliana asked as they sat near the fire.

Cullen looked at the girl across from him. She was nineteen, a full head shorter than he and of slender build. Her warm auburn hair rested on her shoulder in a long braid, blue-green eyes shining in the starlight. He held her gaze too long and looked away a bit embarrassed.

"Well, are you?" she probed.

"A-angry? With you," he stammered in his usual manner, "I would t-think not. You do make me nervous, however."

"Nervous?"

"Um, yes, in a m-manner of speaking."

"How do I make you nervous?" her heart beat faster. The Circle walls were gone and yet there was still something between them.

"I… well I… Why are you asking this?" he dodged.

"You haven't really spoken to me all day. We don't have to talk if you don't want to…"

"No, that's not it," feeling the pressure, Cullen pushed his hand through his blonde hair. It was a nervous mannerism that Kaliana adored. "I would prefer not to make a fool of myself in front of you. Though it seems that is completely unavoidable"

"You are many things Cullen, but you are certainly not a fool."

"I really wish that were true," he said hardly above a whisper. He knew his feelings for Kaliana were beyond foolish. There was no possible future with her, but his feelings for her had only grown the few years he had been around her. Kaliana hadn't encouraged him, nor had she deterred him either. He wasn't like the other Templars in the circle, and she couldn't deny her feelings for him as well.

Cullen prayed every night to the Maker and Andraste, asking why they had seen it fit to torment him so. Now it seemed they were playing some cruel prank on him, as he was no traveling alone with the one person he could never be with.

Looking at her now, in the glow of the campfire, he couldn't help but think that Andraste had put them together for a reason. That maybe this cruel joke of the divine was actually the opportunity he had hoped for since the day they met in the Circle's chapel years ago.

"Can I tell you something, Cullen?" Kaliana asked gently.

Cullen sat up a bit straighter, "of course. You can tell me anything."

The mage moved over next to the Templar and sat down a mere breath's away from him. "Please stop me if I go to far, but I know I'll never get another chance to say this." She looked directly into his warm golden eyes, "I don't know how to say this, but I care about you Cullen. More than I should, and I think you are a wonderful man. Sometimes I wish I wasn't a mage, or maybe that you were, and then we could be…" she trailed off.

Cullen just stared, unable to find the words to reply. He was panicking, his heart said yes, but his head said no.

"I'm sorry, so sorry. Just forget I ever said anything," Kaliana frantically backpedaled. She stood up to leave, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

"Wait!" Cullen grabbed her hand, finally finding his words.

Kaliana stared at him, wide eyed, as he stood and looked down at her.

"I've never been good with words around you," he whispered still holding her hand. "I know what is between us can never be. It goes against everything we have been taught. We can never be together."

She looked away, and fought back tears knowing he was right.

His free hand found her chin and gently raised her face till she was looking into his eyes once more. "We can not be together," he repeated softly, "but that doesn't mean I don't want to be with you. I have cared for you since the day I met you and I no longer have the strength to deny my feelings for you. It is up to you, and when we return to the Circle this will all be over. If word ever got out, the punishments would be… severe. Is this really what you want?"

A tear slid down Kaliana's cheek. She always seemed to cry at the worst times. "I would gladly give my life for a day with you, than spend the rest of my years wondering what could have been."

He pulled her in to his chest, and he held her for what seemed like years. In a week they would have pretend none of this had happened, but right now they had each other.

Kaliana giggled to herself suddenly interrupting the moment.

"What's so funny?" Cullen asked.

"You didn't stumble over your words," she grinned.

Cullen smiled sheepishly, "Well you still make me nervous."

"Perhaps I can change that."

Cullen pulled her closer unable to stop himself from fulfilling a dream three years in the making. When their lips met, they knew there was no turning back now. Their destinies were forever entwined, sealed by a kiss beneath the stars.