Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Rating may go up in future chapters.
Story based on an Elysian Fields challenge issued by tempestt (who asked for S2 Something Blue) and written to fulfill a funny fic prompt by nowinlivingcolor.
Many thanks to Sunalso for the beta work! Please enjoy.
Buffy's nearly too late. By the time the assassins of Taraka drag her into the church main, Spike has already stabbed Drusilla's hand together with her sire's, thus beginning the ritual that will kill-
"Angel!" Buffy struggles against the many hands holding her in place. Creepy bug man grabs her shoulders. Police lady has her by one arm, and a bulky vampire has her by the other. She's totally pinned.
On the dais, Angel groans in agony. Blood sluices down from the knife shish-ka-bobbing his hand to Drusilla's. The mad vampiress leans back against the straps binding them together, face rapturous
Spike, that bastard, finishes reaming Willy for bringing Buffy here and sidles over to gloat. "Yeah. It bugs me too, seeing him like this." They both look at Angel's contorted form: Buffy in horror, Spike in mock concern. "Another five minutes though, and Angel will be dead. So I forebear."
He stands before her, dangerous in game face and black leather. He reaches up with one thickly gloved hand to tug at his red shirt.
Punk. Menace. Thief. Stealing Angel and using him as an ingredient to heal his crazy ho-bag.
She's gonna annihilate him.
"I wouldn't feel too bad for Angel, if I were you," Spike adds. His yellow eyes and fanged mouth prickle at her senses. Vampire! Very close! Why the hell is he smirking? He takes dead-man-walking to a whole new level. He's as good as dust; he just doesn't realize it yet.
Buffy's frozen, unable to snap out her threats, or to pun away like she does in most life and death situations. Angel is right there and he's dying and she can't reach him. She sure as hell can't banter.
Spike's animal gaze sears her face. "He's got something you don't have."
Buffy finds her voice and it cracks with stress and anger. "What's that?"
"Five minutes. Patrice?"
The policewoman releases Buffy to draw her firearm. Spike steps back to facilitate Buffy's murder.
With a loud crack, the next thing Buffy knows is freedom of movement. Her captors roll on the ground, disoriented from blows to the head.
Kendra, standing proud and strong, matches Buffy's position. Shoulder to shoulder they face Spike, the last obstacle to Angel.
He blinks. Kendra's barrage of an attack has clearly caught him off-guard. "Who the hell is this?"
"It's your lucky day, Spike." Buffy nails him in the face. Bam.
"Two slayers," Kendra says. She punches him too. Spike staggers back a step.
Buffy exchanges one look with Kendra and that's all it takes. Her sister slayer comes in swinging to the fight with Spike, covering Buffy's progress to the dais.
She dashes up the short steps to where Angel droops in his chains. Buffy hesitates over the strap binding Angel and Drusilla belly to belly. She needs to take the knife out of their hands, first.
A crash snags her attention. Giles, Willow, and Xander charge through a side entrance to the church hall. Willow raises a cross to her opponent's face-one of the vampires who'd held Buffy captive. Xander zips in to stake the cringing vamp. Simultaneously, Giles raises his crossbow and aims at another minion across the room.
Relief floods through her. Her friends will handle the mess of Spike and the Order of Taraka while she saves Angel.
"Angel," Buffy chokes. Her boyfriend raises his head with effort, pained eyes warming when he sees her. "I've got you, just hold on." Stretching to her tiptoes, Buffy grabs the knife and pulls.
The roar from Angel sickens her. Drusilla's shriek of delight twists her gut and snaps reigns of urgency against her heart. Buffy pulls again, causing Angel to shout in pain.
The knife won't budge.
"Come on! This isn't the sword in the freaking stone!" Buffy appeals to Angel. "You'll die if this stays. I'm sorry."
Buffy yanks hard. Through the immobile knife, she feels the crackle of fine bones snapping. Angel's cry cuts off into harsh breaths.
The knife remains pierced through two hands. Angel's hand is bruising from the trauma. Buffy lets go. "I can't-Angel, how do I stop this?"
Drusilla's giggling madly. "You can't, you can't! Black medicine...murderous child…"
Buffy feels herself harden. "Then I'll dust you." Drusilla's head lolls to the side like it's too heavy to hold up. A too-wide smile stretches her mouth, even as her fey eyes lock onto Buffy's stake.
"No," Angel says weakly. "We're...connected. If you dust her, I'll dust too."
Their eyes meet. Despair fills Buffy. So much resignation in Angel's eyes. "No. There has to be another way."
"There might be." Jenny Calendar kneels down next to Buffy, making her jolt in surprise. Buffy hasn't seen her computer teacher since the Eyghon incident that soured Jenny's relationship with Giles. "Ms. Calendar! Can you fix this?"
"I can try," Jenny says. She starts pouring sand around Drusilla and Angel in a circle.
"Magic…?" Angel whispers. Inches from him, Drusilla's dark eyes go still and distant as she stares down at Jenny's efforts.
Willow runs up, gasping for breath. "I've got the stuff right here, Ms. Calendar."
"What about-" Buffy turns to survey the battle she ducked out of. Giles is battling the last two vampires, barely holding his ground. Xander is nowhere in sight. Kendra is still brawling with Spike and somehow keeping his back to the proceedings up front.
Even as Buffy watches, Kendra stumbles and has to brace her side before re-engaging in battle. Her strength is obviously flagging.
Snap decision. "You'll save him?" Buffy asks of Jenny and Willow.
Jenny flips open an old book while Willow sprinkles some powdery substance in the air over Angel and Drusilla. "I'll do my best," Jenny says.
Buffy squares up, intense. "Save him," she implores. She can't lose Angel.
Willow nods furiously and Jenny angles her chin to the battle. "We will. Go, Buffy."
Buffy goes, straight for Spike. She yells out, "Switch!" to Kendra and the other girl looks grateful. They twist around each other, Kendra spinning away to aid Giles, Buffy slamming her foot into Spike's gut without missing a beat.
Back at the altar, Drusilla is staring at the ceiling like she's trying to watch a movie from the back of the theater and Angel is nearly unconscious.
Magic shimmers in the air. Two more vampires burst in through the side entrance.
Jenny scoots around so that she can see the whole room, keeping an eye on the new approaching threats. It'll have to be now, ready or not. Straightening, she declares: "Let this unholy union part!" Angel and Drusilla fall apart on their backs, bonds cut, the knife clattering down between them.
Rising to her feet, Jenny gathers her spellbook close and edges away from the vampires ascending the few steps. She keeps chanting in a shaky voice.
Meanwhile, Buffy swipes a hand over the scrape on her cheek. Spike bounces to his feet, leering at her and seeming unaware of his interrupted ritual. "I'd rather be fighting you anyway," he says.
Buffy glares. "Mutual."
Up front, snarling vampires are inches from Jenny. She diverts from her original spell ending, and cries: "Cleave together the proper pair!"
Her back hits a wall and she closes her eyes to the sight of impending death. Jenny can only hope the last portion of her spell will fling Angel safely to Buffy's side and knock Drusilla into Spike.
Xander and Cordelia finish smooshing the many parts of Bug Man into goop. They hop over the mess and run into the church sanctuary.
There's a lot happening all at once. Giles is leaning against a pew, alone and surrounded by dust. Kendra is sprinting up to the front to save Ms. Calendar from two attacking vampires. Their teacher is holding a book and backing away from the danger while chanting a spell. Angel and Drusilla lay collapsed on the floor, no longer touching, while Willow crouches over Angel and tugs off his chains.
Nearby, Buffy faces off with Spike. Both fighters are worse for the wear, bleeding and mussed but apparently ready for round two. Willy the Snitch is crawling for the exit.
"Um, who do we even help?" Cordelia asks, head swiveling around to take in the chaos.
Before Xander can reply, Ms. Calendar finishes her spell and backs into a wall. Kendra slams into the two vampires at once, her sinewy arms hooking around their necks.
A bright flash of light ripples through the church and several crackling booms, like invisible fireworks, startle the room into a standstill.
The only one to move is Kendra, who dispatches her opponents with two neat thrusts of the stake. She and Jenny look around to see what happened.
"Did Ms. Calendar just do a spell?" Cordelia stage whispers.
"I think so?" Xander can't see any weird change, except for how quiet the room suddenly is.
That's when Spike lowers his fists and drops down to one knee. After a charged moment, Buffy steps closer, hand pressed to her mouth. The way they're looking at each other is very strange, in Xander's opinion, for mortal enemies.
Spike game face has fallen away. He holds out a hand, palm up toward Buffy who gasps.
Buffy takes his hand.
Xander jumps when someone grips his shoulder, but it's only Giles leaning on him as he peers at his slayer.
Spike expels a breath like he's nervous or maybe really excited. "Buffy, Slayer. I can't wait any longer to ask you this. Will you marry me?"
The needle scratches off the record. Even Willy pauses his escape to gape at the two fighters.
Xander checks his ears for wax build up. Surely he misheard that last part. Whatever's going on with Spike, at least Buffy has a clear shot to-
Buffy's eyes are sparkling with tears. "Spike! I…It's just so sudden. I don't know what to say."
Spike's voice deepens with intent. "Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on earth."
Giles gives an alarmed wheeze behind Xander which sums the whole thing up pretty well.
"Oh, Spike. Of course it's yes!"
Spike grins, happy and boyish, and rises to his feet to gather Buffy close. Xander blinks because something must be wrong with his eyes and then Buffy's kissing Spike like there's no tomorrow.