" What is going on with you B, usallly your always up for a little girl talk, i need your help please?

"Can we please have a few more minuets sister dear? Its getting a little stuffy under here" a new voice muttered as the one and only chuck bass poped his head out from under the covers

"what are you doing here chuck?" chuck just smirked and licked his lips

" Oh god you two are disgusting ! just eww!"

"S, its not what you think"- blair when to continue when serena cut her off –

"No Blair i know exactly what this is it, Its like we are going back to before your 17th birthday not after your 20th. The sneaking around no strings attached or mabey there are strings but we all know where that ends up don't we blair ?" cocking her eyebrow "have you ever told him?"

"Serena don't you dare that is not you secret to tell" blair stated glaring at her best friend

" You think i don't know S? you might have to be told everything but i know Blair and even if she hasn't told me i know about her problem. I also knew if she wanted me to know that she would have told me so now that you know that i know, what are you refering to? how does this have anything to do with blairs problem "

"chuck just leave it alone, please" blair grasped his hand squeezing it, pleading with him to let it go.

"Serena i think its time you leave, blair and i need to talk" S nodded closing the door softy behind her.

Chuck turned to face blair bringing his hands to her chin so he could make her look in his eyes

"Please tell me that she not saying what i think she is, please tell me that ive never made you feel like you need to do that, i know we have hurt each other but please tell me it wasn't that bad that i made you feel like you had to do that blair ?"

"I cant chuck, cause honestly its not true, i wish it was but it isn't like you said this isn't a fairy tale. "

"Christ blair when? I need to know when"

"recently or back around my 17th?"

"start from the beginning please"

"You know when i thought i was pregnant and it was posed on gossip girl. The night after you said what you did i was almost on a plane to stay with Daddy but S stopped me and i stayed but i started again untill S found out and took me back to the doctor. I was fine untill Tuscany the first week when i was alone there, i dont think my problems ever been worse, but i went and saw a doctor over there who was in contact with my doctor back home and i worked myself out.

"Christ Blair, why wouldnt you tell me about this ?"

"Would you have cared back then?"

"No matter whats been going on with us, i will always care about you i know recently it hasnt seemed like it but i need you to know that no matter what im always here for you. Know i have a a feeling that Tuscany wasnt the last time so tell me the rest please?"

" I was honestly fine for a while, untill the thing with Jack and the hotel and while i was in france after the Jenny thing i was in a hospital and before you start the reason you dont know is because i went in under a fake name and only S knew."

"You were in hospital? Blair what did you do?"

"Its hard to explain basicly, my body couldnt take it anymore"

"Never agian, blair please promise me, no matter what you wont do this again, come and talk to me, talk to S just please dont hurt yourself like that agian"

"I cant promise that chuck but i can promise to try"

"I suppose i can handle that, now was that the last time"

"No"

"Blair, tell me please i need to know"

" When everything was going on with Eva almost everynight till when you declared war and the next day i knew that i needed to go to the Doctors cause i would have been back in hospital with the amount i was doing that and i couldnt give you ammo like that so i havent since you declared war" He didnt speak just wrapped his arms around me buring his face in my hair. I dont know how much time passed but i felt him place a kiss on the crown of my head.

"Im so sorry"

"Your hear now thats all that matters" i replied

"I know that ive said otheriwse and acted otherwsise but Blair I love you and i always will no matter what happens with us so please always remember that"

"I will, I love you too Chuck" i replied my eyes drooping as i driffed of to sleep in his arms.

And for the first time in months i felt content and safe.