Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, and, sadly, I don't own this plot. It's from a group on facebook, it's just been prettied up.
Harry and Ron were sitting at a table in Diagon Ally, contemplating what a young wizard had said. He had asked which one was cooler than the other, a question which should not be asked when you're talking to two best friends.
Then Harry said, "Well, I can talk to snakes."
"Yeah? Well Dumbledore gave me his magic lighter," Ron argued.
"I have an invisibility cloak."
Ron had realized that he was out of material, so he struck with a low-blow. "I have parents."
Harry didn't look offended. He simply smirked and said, "I banged your sister," leaving Ron utterly speechless.